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In retrospect

leezer99leezer99 I swear I am quitting this site every day...Members Posts: 1,323 ✭✭✭✭✭✭

In the vein of hindsight being 20/20, I was just wondering what you would have done differently with your junior golfer over the past two, five or ten years (depending on age obviously) to better prepare them for what they were getting into. Would you have entered different tournaments, practiced differently, focused more on schoolwork, used different equipment or did you do it right from the get go? I realize it's a pretty difficult conversation because none of us know where they will land in the future but looking at your present situation it should be an interesting conversation.

Hope you all have a great 3 day Labor Day weekend. Stay safe out there!

There's definitely something more important that I should be doing.

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  • wkuo3wkuo3 RELEASE Members Posts: 4,333 ✭✭✭✭✭✭✭

    Instead of practice , golf and entering the tournaments ( which is important to compete with the peer, but not always ).
    I would take the kid to observe the best in the region, on the peer and the big tour. As often as possible.
    They have to understand the bar that they're measuring up to. Never pressure them to set goal and work hard to reach the goals. The learning process should be a self realization of what's out there and no pressure to be the best if they have decided to jump in the race.
    If the child is not a stand out golfer in his/her peer, have more fun doing it. Not everyone is made to be on the professional tour. Golf is a life lesson which could influence the child's entire life.
    Golf is like any event in a child's life. Learning process needs to be self motivated. What a guardian does is open the door to another world for the child and the child has to step inside by their own will, not pushed in.

  • leezer99leezer99 I swear I am quitting this site every day... Members Posts: 1,323 ✭✭✭✭✭✭

    @wkuo3 said:
    Instead of practice , golf and entering the tournaments ( which is important to compete with the peer, but not always ).
    I would take the kid to observe the best in the region, on the peer and the big tour. As often as possible.
    They have to understand the bar that they're measuring up to. Never pressure them to set goal and work hard to reach the goals. The learning process should be a self realization of what's out there and no pressure to be the best if they have decided to jump in the race.
    If the child is not a stand out golfer in his/her peer, have more fun doing it. Not everyone is made to be on the professional tour. Golf is a life lesson which could influence the child's entire life.
    Golf is like any event in a child's life. Learning process needs to be self motivated. What a guardian does is open the door to another world for the child and the child has to step inside by their own will, not pushed in.

    I will have to reflect on this but I agree wholeheartedly with this statement.

    There's definitely something more important that I should be doing.

  • heavy_hitterheavy_hitter Members Posts: 3,326 ✭✭✭✭✭✭✭
    1. Would have gotten him a trainer sooner rather than a swing coach.

    2. Would have made a change in coaches sooner.

    3. Wouldn't have spent as much time on the course with him.

    4. Would have never talked to him about rankings.

  • kekoakekoa ClubWRX Posts: 9,123 ClubWRX

    In retrospect, I would of had my kid focus a lot more on schoolwork. This guy thinks he's going to the PGA, but doesn't have a clue just how hard the journey is. He's also mentioned a few times about skipping college if he could. When he says this, I have to hold my wife back from slapping him upside the head. By no means is he dumb, but he is just lacking in work ethic and discipline when it comes to school. We are trying to instill this in him now, but its a lot harder at 9 and will only be more difficult as time goes on.
    Other than the above, I don't really have any regrets. With regards to equipment, I took a big gamble in moving my son to adult iron heads when he was 7. This could have been a huge disaster, but ended up working very well. The process was expensive, but also fun as my son and I are both gearheads.

  • NolesNoles Members Posts: 1,468 ✭✭✭✭✭✭

    @kekoa said:
    In retrospect, I would of had my kid focus a lot more on schoolwork. This guy thinks he's going to the PGA, but doesn't have a clue just how hard the journey is. He's also mentioned a few times about skipping college if he could. When he says this, I have to hold my wife back from slapping him upside the head. By no means is he dumb, but he is just lacking in work ethic and discipline when it comes to school. We are trying to instill this in him now, but its a lot harder at 9 and will only be more difficult as time goes on.
    Other than the above, I don't really have any regrets. With regards to equipment, I took a big gamble in moving my son to adult iron heads when he was 7. This could have been a huge disaster, but ended up working very well. The process was expensive, but also fun as my son and I are both gearheads.

    Take this from an elementary school teacher: Most 9 year old boys do not have work ethic or discipline when it comes to school. When a 9 year old boy does, its an exception. Is he kind? Does he get along with kids his age? Is he socially appropriate? These are way more important at age 9 then work ethic. Of course he doesn't have a clue how hard a journey getting to the tour is. What 9 year old would? Does he know what it takes to become an accountant? An attorney? I think you get the point. His development as a person is what is most important right now. Teach him work ethic, but don't be surprised or frustrated by his lack of it.

  • mrshinsamrshinsa Members Posts: 229 ✭✭✭
    1. Would have went with US Kids instead of Flynn
    2. Would have went straight to US Kids TS, instead of Ultralight
    3. Would have not wasted so much money on "Golf Academy"
  • TripleBogeysrbetterTripleBogeysrbetter Members Posts: 193 ✭✭✭

    There is a few for us (me).
    I wouldn't been on the course with him as much in the beginning. Partly we don't have many kids playing at his club.
    Could have struck with one driver for a year.
    Never switched from cleveland wedges to vokeys.
    Hammered it home that you running out of time to be a junior golfer. One tournament a year isn't going to cut it. Tournament golf is different than practice rounds.

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  • leezer99leezer99 I swear I am quitting this site every day... Members Posts: 1,323 ✭✭✭✭✭✭

    @kekoa said:
    In retrospect, I would of had my kid focus a lot more on schoolwork. This guy thinks he's going to the PGA, but doesn't have a clue just how hard the journey is. He's also mentioned a few times about skipping college if he could. When he says this, I have to hold my wife back from slapping him upside the head. By no means is he dumb, but he is just lacking in work ethic and discipline when it comes to school. We are trying to instill this in him now, but its a lot harder at 9 and will only be more difficult as time goes on.
    Other than the above, I don't really have any regrets. With regards to equipment, I took a big gamble in moving my son to adult iron heads when he was 7. This could have been a huge disaster, but ended up working very well. The process was expensive, but also fun as my son and I are both gearheads.

    I guess we are lucky with the schoolwork piece since Mom is the brains of the operation. The boy has received his President's Education Award each of the last two years and has made it a goal to continue receiving it. He actually had two B's near the end of the year last year and worked his behind off to get his grade back up to an A in each class.

    As for equipment I actually took your lead and moved my son away from GI irons into some forged 'players irons'. The quality of strike immediately went through the roof and along with the move to steel shafts he started being much more consistent in distance and dispersion. I actually really enjoyed the process of learning how to properly cut shafts, install new shafts, bending for the correct loft / lie, etc. It is expensive though! Maybe I need to get a deal like BW has. LOL

    There's definitely something more important that I should be doing.

  • leezer99leezer99 I swear I am quitting this site every day... Members Posts: 1,323 ✭✭✭✭✭✭

    @TripleBogeysrbetter said:
    There is a few for us (me).
    I wouldn't been on the course with him as much in the beginning. Partly we don't have many kids playing at his club.
    Could have struck with one driver for a year.
    Never switched from cleveland wedges to vokeys.
    Hammered it home that you running out of time to be a junior golfer. One tournament a year isn't going to cut it. Tournament golf is different than practice rounds.

    This bolded part is huge. We have a friend that only puts his kid into a couple of events each year and he wonders why his results from our practice rounds to tournament rounds doesn't translate. I've also seen that in the younger age groups that the more highly ranked kids are playing more events. Not that rankings mean a lot at my son's age but there has to be a correlation there.

    There's definitely something more important that I should be doing.

  • BloctonGolf11BloctonGolf11 Members Posts: 378 ✭✭✭✭
    edited Aug 30, 2019 6:18pm #11

    Would have kept him away from certain tournaments instead of letting him continually lose to the same opponent repeatedly, for about a year it really messed with his head and confidence and we are really only seeing him claw his way back into actually believing he is capable of playing at a high level. I also wouldn't have freaked out about (not at him, to myself) him not winning tournaments. He is that kid who can play well but has a curse about winning and I was worried it would mess with his mental side. In retrospect that was me being idiotic and overly worrying. I would let him practice with the girl who has become his mainstay practice partner a lot more. Every since they paired up to practice this summer I have seen a monumental change in his confidence in the game.

    When it comes to balance I feel we have done an excellent job with that. My son has two teachers looking over his shoulder as parents so he knows that school is his 100% priority and golf is what he does for fun and as a way to learn some very important life lessons. As well, we have kept him grounded and he has a major balance of all facets of life. We regularly take extended breaks where he is only playing a little golf so he keeps things in perspective.

    Just a father and son on a journey together through golf....
  • wkuo3wkuo3 RELEASE Members Posts: 4,333 ✭✭✭✭✭✭✭
    edited Aug 30, 2019 6:58pm #12

    @leezer99 said:

    @wkuo3 said:
    Instead of practice , golf and entering the tournaments ( which is important to compete with the peer, but not always ).
    I would take the kid to observe the best in the region, on the peer and the big tour. As often as possible.
    They have to understand the bar that they're measuring up to. Never pressure them to set goal and work hard to reach the goals. The learning process should be a self realization of what's out there and no pressure to be the best if they have decided to jump in the race.
    If the child is not a stand out golfer in his/her peer, have more fun doing it. Not everyone is made to be on the professional tour. Golf is a life lesson which could influence the child's entire life.
    Golf is like any event in a child's life. Learning process needs to be self motivated. What a guardian does is open the door to another world for the child and the child has to step inside by their own will, not pushed in.

    I will have to reflect on this but I agree wholeheartedly with this statement.

    And from experience with my own and others, it'll be a whole lot easier if, the child is self motivated. For the benefit of the child and your own.

  • TripleBogeysrbetterTripleBogeysrbetter Members Posts: 193 ✭✭✭
    edited Aug 30, 2019 8:54pm #13

    This bolded part is huge. We have a friend that only puts his kid into a couple of events each year and he wonders why his results from our practice rounds to tournament rounds doesn't translate. I've also seen that in the younger age groups that the more highly ranked kids are playing more events. Not that rankings mean a lot at my son's age but there has to be a correlation there.

    It's like anything in the modern era. Everything has to be organized. Son would never practice baseball or football with friends in an open field on his own with friends. Once the season started he was fine with doing 4-5 practices a week and games. It was a set date and time.

    For junior golf it's different animal. It was different for us to understand. We came into this knowing nothing or anyone. No one to really help understand anything. He is a naturally gifted athlete and super smart. Good genes from his mom (i guess or swapped at birth).
    The club pro mentioned to him some about tournaments in the area. Son was always hesitate cause "those kids have played since they were 5".
    His swing coach challenged him over the winter to play less "casual golf" and more tournaments. He said you will see that the casual golf scores might go up because you're more inclined to work on something. Then you will see your tournament scores lower, cause you know the grid it takes.


    edit


    Learning this information. When my daughter decided to take up golf this summer. I threw her into the deep end. First time on a regulation course she was playing 9 holes in a tournament. I tell you she is so much better for it.

    Post edited by TripleBogeysrbetter on
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  • tiger1873tiger1873 Members Posts: 1,183 ✭✭✭✭✭✭

    Would have fired the first coach much sooner rather then sticking with them. You can’t assume the instructor knows that much and some them have no idea of how to score low.

  • yellowlover519yellowlover519 Members Posts: 397 ✭✭✭✭

    Would have banned fortnite - lol. On a serious note - would have taught him green to tee not vice versa. Just expected his short game to be good bc he’s pretty athletic and was so obsessed with maximizing swing efficiency. Put him into MP-5s at age 9. Now it’s starting to round out but shot a 78 at a recent event with 5 3-putts. Happy that he hit 15 greens but 5 3-putts is absurd...

  • wildcatdenwildcatden China Cat Sunflower Members Posts: 980 ✭✭✭✭✭

    At younger ages (mine is currently 8YO), there is no need to play massive amounts of tournaments. We played around 15-20 tournaments at age 6 and 7. At age 8, we will play just 7 this year. Instead, just go play golf (and many other sports) and stay away from the junior golf arms race of equipment, coaches, trainers and mental coaches until at least age 10 or 11. So meany greats didn't even start playing golf until these ages or later such as Nicklaus (10), Hogan (11) and Norman (15). Let others be the rabbit. You be the greyhound.

    -- Two things don't last long. Dogs chasing cars and golf pro's putting for pars. --

  • kcapkcap Members Posts: 189 ✭✭✭

    We started playing tournament golf only as a late 9 yr old .. sometime I wish we started earlier cause he loved golf.
    2. Invested in a good coach at a earlier age..
    3. Was very keen to see him win at a earlier age..I am still keen but also realize his is just not there to win regional and national levels..
    4. Found this jr golf section golfwrx earlier. Since it help me realize that skiing is dangerous for golf and the most imp fact “winning at 12 means nothing”!!

  • hangontighthangontight Members Posts: 623 ✭✭✭✭✭

    @heavy_hitter and @kcap - you both had similar responses about finding a good coach /switching coaches earlier. Care to elaborate? Was it just finding the right fit or stepping up to maybe a coach with higher credentials and or solid track record with juniors? What age would you have done all this?

  • FSUGolfdogFSUGolfdog Members Posts: 167 ✭✭✭

    This is a great question.
    Obviously if I had unlimited funds there would have been more higher level tournaments and a high profile swing coach. Giving the same level of funding I don't think I would have changed anything.
    My son is playing at a top 15 DII program, he's a smart, well rounded young man who has his head on straight. He understands that unless something changes a lot for the better he won't be playing professional golf. He works hard to get better and loves playing. The game has already given him so much, from members at our club giving him summer jobs to working in the pro shop for 4 years, interacting with adults and now paying a portion of his college tuition.

  • TripleBogeysrbetterTripleBogeysrbetter Members Posts: 193 ✭✭✭

    @yellowlover519 said:
    Would have banned fortnite - lol. On a serious note - would have taught him green to tee not vice versa. Just expected his short game to be good bc he’s pretty

    Thinking of banning forenite and taking away the car when he cant scramble 50% and only hits 2 greens. Honestly, Im thinking next fews tournament I wont even be in the same zip code.

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  • kekoakekoa ClubWRX Posts: 9,123 ClubWRX

    Should have bought my son a trackman instead of getting a family car.

    Half kidding, but I saw two girls last night at our local range. One had a flightscope and the other a trackman. Must be nice!!!

  • TripleBogeysrbetterTripleBogeysrbetter Members Posts: 193 ✭✭✭

    Half kidding, but I saw two girls last night at our local range. One had a flightscope and the other a trackman. Must be nice!!!

    We have TM / FS and a GC 4. Want to ensure all the numbers match and no equipment failure.

    I thought this is how everyone rolls? sighs Guess not. :-)

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  • zztop32zztop32 Members Posts: 3

    Only been at this a little over a year, but have learned plenty in that short amount of time. Along with other sports and activities, we spent the last year dedicated or as I like to say "forced my child" in this disciplined game (I am of the opinion that most kids, especially young ones DO NOT like golf vs other team sports or fun stuff (playground, tag, etc.). My child has grown a bit more fond of golf mainly from winning, thrill of making a great shot, and hi fives from dad but is still very young and would rather be at the pool. In retrospect, I would change too many things to list, but what I am changing is we will play much less golf and focus on refinement of skills and basic athleticism now that he has built a solid base. Will replace with more fun stuff along with the same 2-3 team sports...

  • heavy_hitterheavy_hitter Members Posts: 3,326 ✭✭✭✭✭✭✭
    edited Sep 5, 2019 1:25pm #24

    @hangontight said:
    @heavy_hitter and @kcap - you both had similar responses about finding a good coach /switching coaches earlier. Care to elaborate? Was it just finding the right fit or stepping up to maybe a coach with higher credentials and or solid track record with juniors? What age would you have done all this?

    Finding a coach is easy. Finding a good coach with the right fit isn't. Just because they have played high level golf and have a FlightScope/Trackman doesn't make them good. Just because they are good doesn't make them the right fit. There are some guys that are great coaches, but don't know how to teach swing. There are guys that are great at teaching the swing and have no idea of how to progress your kid through junior golf. Finding someone that can do everything is difficult. You have to find someone that fills in the gaps from what you need for your kid.

    As an example, my kid understands how to play the game. His fist 3 coaches were great at teaching the game and on course management. Unfortunately, they all lacked in areas where he really needed work which was TPI, sequencing the swing, and putting mechanics. First two coaches my son just didn't gel with. First coach I pulled away from after a month.
    Second coach he told me after 2 weeks it wasn't going to work and I pushed it for a year. Third coach was awesome with my kid and we really wanted it to work, but he had no understanding of how to fix and maintain his swing. None understood the importance of of how to put together a schedule or what tournaments to play in. Sons new coach has Flight Scope, KVest, Sam Putt Lab, and is TPI level 3 certified. My kid also gets along with him because they both have the same personalities and are both a little nerdy. I don't know how much his new coach understands how to teach on course management, but he really doesn't need that. He usually doesn't make mistakes that are going to kill him. It also gels with what I know how to do which is how to make a schedule and what tournaments to play in.

    Don't go to a coach just because he is cheap. By the same token don't go to a coach because they are expensive. You should know if it is going to work within the first few lessons. If you feel it doesn't, then move on.

  • kekoakekoa ClubWRX Posts: 9,123 ClubWRX

    Not to get too far off track, but to add to @heavy_hitter statements above, I think it is also important to determine if the instructor has connects with local college coaches. Some do and some don't. Certain instructor around here feed big D1 programs. Kids/Parents know this and pay a premium for lessons hoping thing pan out.

  • heavy_hitterheavy_hitter Members Posts: 3,326 ✭✭✭✭✭✭✭

    @kekoa said:
    Not to get too far off track, but to add to @heavy_hitter statements above, I think it is also important to determine if the instructor has connects with local college coaches. Some do and some don't. Certain instructor around here feed big D1 programs. Kids/Parents know this and pay a premium for lessons hoping thing pan out.

    California is a lot different than where we are in Florida. Have to be in a metropolitan area to get that.

  • leezer99leezer99 I swear I am quitting this site every day... Members Posts: 1,323 ✭✭✭✭✭✭

    @heavy_hitter said:

    @kekoa said:
    Not to get too far off track, but to add to @heavy_hitter statements above, I think it is also important to determine if the instructor has connects with local college coaches. Some do and some don't. Certain instructor around here feed big D1 programs. Kids/Parents know this and pay a premium for lessons hoping thing pan out.

    California is a lot different than where we are in Florida. Have to be in a metropolitan area to get that.

    Guess we lucked out, my son's coach has contacts across the country and is also a D1 assistant coach. My son practiced with a kid on the SMU team a week or two ago.

    There's definitely something more important that I should be doing.

  • BertGABertGA Members Posts: 341 ✭✭✭✭

    On the topic of selecting a good coach, good fit, I wonder to what degree timing is relevant. My daughter, 10 y/o, recently went back to seeing the first coach she had. Just one fo the pros at our club. I remember not being satisfied the first go round, but decided to give it another shot after other coaches did not work out.

    Compared to two years ago, I can tell you now that my daughter is much more excited about golf. She has more fun just going out on the course. She was disappointed when I had to cancel 9 holes with her last weekend because of work. I can see she is much more invested in getting better, and I am much more satisfied with her coach now than I was the first time two years ago.

  • CaptJoshCaptJosh Members Posts: 10 ✭✭

    My son is just starting on this journey and has only been playing a few months. Lots of good advice in here for me.

  • CTgolfCTgolf Members Posts: 503 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited Sep 6, 2019 11:40am #30

    Compete against top players more often.

    I will also be provocative and say that what you do as a parent matters MORE earlier (at younger ages) than later. By the time they are 12 or 13yo they are pretty much their own person and parents have much less influence in shaping who they become - they are on their way to being independent already.

  • kekoakekoa ClubWRX Posts: 9,123 ClubWRX

    In retrospect, I probably shouldn't have introduced my son to fishing which happened a few months ago. The guy is obsessed. If given a choice, I think he would now rather go fish than golf. That's disturbing!! Last week we were in the desert for a practice round and he is there looking for fish in every pond. He recently went so far to say that if golf doesn't work out he wants to be a pro fisherman. ughhhh

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