Handicaps for juniors when playing against Dad

Hello all,

I have 2 sons that are enjoying golf and are becoming more competitive. One is 10 1/2 and the other is 13 (he is almost 6 feet tall and is driving the ball 240 the odd time when he goes easier on the swing. I am having troubles getting him to go 80%)

10 year old shoots low 70's 13 year old shoots high 60's

They both want to beat me, I usually score in the low 60's (2 or 3 birdies per round) on the par 54 pitch and putts with the longest hole being about 125-140 yards.

I dont know how to handicap myself and my kids so we can be on a level playing field. 20 years ago I was possibly a low 2 digit player. Shooting mid 70's and low 80's from the blues.

Can anyone help me out so we can get my kids beating me and me not have to miss putts or greens on purpose.

Thanks for any advice you can offer!

Kids can get handicaps. It just takes a little longer to enter enough scores. My 11 year old daughter has one and she has to give me strokes.

My son is 10. I'm a 3 handicap currently. I just look at our scores and make a determination off that. At one point, when my son was shooting in the mid-high 50s for 9 holes, I gave my son 2 strokes per hole (him off forward tee and me off the tips). When he got around the low 50s, I went to 1.5 per hole. When he got in the high 40s, I dropped it to 1 per hole. Now that he is scoring in the low to mid 40s (and able to break 90 from the forward tee for 18), we have agreed to 10 shots for 18. We play for a coke or candy bar after the round. Basically, I try to make it where he can beat me, but only if he plays well and earns it. Last time out, he played poorly for him and shot 98. I beat him by over 20 shots and relished my Dr. Pepper after the round ?. We both are competitive and enjoy needling each other in a good natured way. And trust me, he lets me hear it when he beats me.

Thank you for your replies!

I shot a 62 yesterday and my 13 year old shot a 73 on a par 56. I think giving him 10 strokes would be a good starting place.

My 10 year old shoots about the same as his brother. He's much more serious to get better.

Thanks for your thoughts, I really appreciate it.

Man, does that sound like fun. You’re a lucky man Metrocruiser. Relish it.

Why would you get him to go 80%? That is a theory used with old balata balls.

Is there different tee boxes you could use? I know its different than the question, but might be a way to play straight up.

I have to give my daughter strokes (currently). I can move back a tee box and that seems to equal it out.

Good morning HH, he seems to lose a lot of control by trying to pound the ball into outer space. He loses his face control and pushes or pulls massively. I'm trying to teach him control before distance. He is very inconsistent with the driver. I want him to go easy with the arms, relaxed grip, use the body for the power with a nice full rotation from knees, hips and shoulders and it will feel effortless like Freddy and Ernie.

He does the same thing with his irons. Just the other day was the 1st time I played with him away from the range since March. For instance, he used a 9 iron to a 125 hole. I used an easy 8 and had a birdie chance. He ended up short and right because his face opened up. If he did hit it square he could make it 125 but I'm trying to teach him that there are other options like an easy 8 or a fade.

Hi TBb, we were playing at a par 3 1500 yards pitch and putt. The longest hole is 125 yards. They only have 1 tee box position.

I walk with them sometimes during lessons, that are sometimes on the full course. They have red, white, blue and black tees there. Next time I play on a full course I think I will play from blacks and my 13 yo whites and 10 yo reds.

Have a great day all!

I don't know where you live or where you play, but if I were you I would try to find them an instructor. More than likely him losing control isn't from him swinging it 100% and is being caused by other swing issues.

I don't give my kid any strokes. He has only ever beaten me once and that was after I had walked four days in a row prior and just didn't have my legs under me. (I know... excuses are like a-holes, everyone has one and they all stink) Even if I offered him strokes he wouldn't take them.

Go to a regulation course. Have the 10 yo play the forward tees and the 13 yo play the middle tees. You play the blues. Don't be surprised if your wish comes true.

I'm a 5 index and have no doubt my son can beat me if he plays reds and I play blues. I'll probably shoot 77/78 and he will shoot right around par.

My index is 13.6 and my 11 year old daughter’s is a 10.0. She recently moved back to our “Gold” tees at 5600 yds and I still cannot beat her playing from the blue tees at 6600 yards.

My daughter doesnt like taking strokes either, so the reason for me going back a tee box or so. i usually play from the member tees but if its straight up between her and I. I will go to the tips.

I gave strokes until my kids got better than me and then suddenly, they thought giving strokes wasn't right anymore.... Every now and then, we use the differential so I can be competitive but I'm glad to be out there playing with them - it's going by quickly so enjoy the time with them while they're home. I'd let your kids set up the games as long as they're not being too generous to themselves to win all the time. I'd rather let them lead on things like this.

Thank you all for the replies!

I play skins w my 7yo and she gets no strokes, but just plays from appropriate yardage so it’s competitive. I have to start moving her back as she’s been dominating me lately...

I play with my 10yo son at the local pitch and put. 

His first handicap was 3 shots per hole and he could kick it out from under the trees or retake shots. 

He quickly moved to 2 shots per hole.

Hes now down to 2 shots on 4 holes and 1 shot on the other 5. Plus he has to play out from under the trees or he can move it for a penalty shot. 

He can choose 3 shots per round to take again. 

We have made up a stroke index for him so he knows which holes he gets 1 or 2 shots. This allows us to play stroke play, stableford and matchplay. 

I'm not strict with it sometimes we don't even score. It's got to be fun. 

I personally wouldn’t give any strokes. Especially to the 13 year old. The motivation should be to beat you, I wouldn’t lower the bar to make that easy.  
 

 Control before distance is backwards thinking.  If his technique improves he will hit it both further and straighter.  He should be hitting 9 iron 150 yards and driver close to 300 at his size.   Find a great instructor and they will beat you in no time

Both my kids - Son is 13 and my daughter is 10 and we have our normal Sunday afternoon "tournament".     Both my kids play in real tournaments on Saturday so this turns out to be a relaxing fun time on the course but very competitive since they really want to beat me.    We do work on specifics like course management but most of the time they are on their own battling me.   

I started out similar to others in this post about 1 or 2 strokes a side but that quickly turned out badly for me.      We are now playing straight up but it is important to be at the right tee box or location to still have fun.     We have now transitioned into other games like Wolf or Quota.   They absolutely love quota (guesstimate on handicap is fine and adjust if need be) and allows them to play against any handicaps / players.    We have about 10 people on Sunday afternoon that play across all age groups.    They cannot wait to see how they did against that group.   

Tons of fun!!  

12 minutes ago, MPG said:

Both my kids - Son is 13 and my daughter is 10 and we have our normal Sunday afternoon "tournament".     Both my kids play in real tournaments on Saturday so this turns out to be a relaxing fun time on the course but very competitive since they really want to beat me.    We do work on specifics like course management but most of the time they are on their own battling me.   

 

I started out similar to others in this post about 1 or 2 strokes a side but that quickly turned out badly for me.      We are now playing straight up but it is important to be at the right tee box or location to still have fun.     We have now transitioned into other games like Wolf or Quota.   They absolutely love quota (guesstimate on handicap is fine and adjust if need be) and allows them to play against any handicaps / players.    We have about 10 people on Sunday afternoon that play across all age groups.    They cannot wait to see how they did against that group.   

 

Tons of fun!!  

 

 

I remember those days. It was fun when I controlled the scores. That is, fun when it lasted. Alas, I found myself struggling and sweating over every misplaced putt, and now play the front tees while my son and daughter play back. Lol.

I’m about even with my daughter on a good day with me playing old equipment which is worth about 2-3 strokes at most.