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MD/DC/VA Golfers - Twelve Monkeys Mental Divergence


eagle1997

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I definitely want to play a "bugler". Farting when your ball is in the air. Par or better = dot.

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American Vandal, Season 2 : The Turd Burglar.

 

Previews are up. That's not a joke. AVS1 was best show of 2017.

 

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MD CUP Qualifying Recap (this time with words)

 

so, like i was telling fabb last week, i had kinda been pointing to this round all year, getting my game ready. i actually *gasp* practiced a couple times in the couple weeks leading up to it, and had back-to-back rounds of golf the weekend prior at UMD (The Hive) and Queenstown (DCGT). besides a bit of a crisis with the putter, i felt nearly there. a practice round at worthington the week of would have been the last piece, wasn't able to pull that off tho. i literally had been dreaming about the tournament leading up to it. sometimes good, sometime bad. fell asleep every night for 2 weeks thinking about how to play certain holes.

 

friday comes and it's just a sauna outside. i'm sweating right now thinking about it. it was thick and disgusting. i warmed up in a tshirt (getting all kinds of WTF looks from the guys preening in the matching logo’d attire) and that soaks thru in 5 minutes. after about 20 balls, i go inside, change shirts, then go back out and hit putts. the warm up went, uh, not so good. i'm jacked up, and nervous. putter was ok and seeing golferdrew drain a few putts from all over the putting green calmed me down a bit. dude is a baller. more on him later. the main putting green was closed which was a huge bummer.

 

by some fortuitous happenstance, for the shotgun start, i’m going off the 1st hole, paired up with two guys i know well, obarksy and another old friend pedro. blue mash guys. didn't ask for the starting hole or the pairing, lucked out with both. we're 1B, and they're sending 2 groups per tee, but primarily "starting" on 10 and 1. worked out that there was no one behind us. glorious. format is a two man better ball, blue tees. just like anyone who's paired up with a golfer that is much better than him (drew has a 0.6 hcp), i felt an internalized pre-round pressure to make sure i contributed to the team. #1. it’s a dumb way to think. #2. it inhibits performance. thankfully, that all kind of went away when the round started. for the net division, drew got 1 stroke on hole 3, as a 6.5 index, i got 8 strokes. based on recent hive event performances, i'm thinking we have a chance for qualifying on net, drew's thinks we have no chance net, our only hope is gross. he was right.

 

i won’t do the hole-by-hole, but will mention some highlights.

 

- drew didn't make any birdies, but it wasn't because he left any short. fearless. i've never seen someone run so many birdie putts past the hole (he had a ton of birdie putts). and every single time it mattered, he made the comebacker for par. unreal. from 4, 6, 8 feet or more. the downhill slopes kinda got him a bit on the first putt... rock solid on the follow up. same way with the driver. he bashed the big stick all day. some of that confidence he had definitely rubbed off on me.

 

- i'm personally +4 through 5 and am on the wrong side of the hump of the par 3 6th. not playing well. still nervous. flag is back left, i'm right fringe. i hit my line (the top of the slope), but way too hard. ball rolls off the green. meanwhile, i had given drew bad advice on the tee and he's flown the green and makes bogey. we're (+1) as a team right now. i get a 2nd read from drew because it's a bit of a vague putt. he's got it going left, i've got it breaking right... split the difference with the left edge and dammed if the ball doesn't go right in the middle with perfect speed. big high five. drew's eyes get big and he goes, "that was HUGE." i finally start to breathe.

 

- i hit the best drive of my life off #9 tee. goosehook long. 181 stick, pin is middle left. we're talking about the shot, it's a little downwind, and a little downhill... drew says, "take one less and trust it." i smoke a 6i off a downhill lie that carries the front edge by a yard and rolls past the cup. scare it for eagle, tap in bird. awesome hole. our first birdie of the day, gets us back to even.

 

- i pull-hook a 5w on 11 and it bounces a couple times, maybe OB. provisional is piped down the middle. GRRRRRRRRR. lucky that i find my first one, but i am bush-restricted on the swing. 120 stick, i pull PW and manufacture even more of an OTT slice swing to try to avoid the bush. hit the bush going back, hit the bush going thru. ball comes out perfect tho, carries the front pot bunker and i have 15 feet from the fringe for bird. even my buddy perdro is clapping from the fairway. ridiculous golf shot. we both make par.

 

- we had 3 lightning delays, starting on 11. that sucked. drew goes, this is actually an advantage to us, we can handle the start and stops. he was right. :) they had caribbean cask too and eye candy and air conditioning, so not all bad to sit at the bar for a few minutes.

 

- drew makes a great par on 12 with an up and down from the right side of the green with another 6 footer for par. so solid.

 

- i bash another drive on 13. 187 left to a back pin, very downwind. i pull 7i and get it hole high. close to the pin, but in a tough spot. very thick rough, 2 feet off the green, green sloping away from me. i hit a good one, but it hits fringe and just stands on the brakes. 10 feet left. drew somehow 2 putts for par from the front of the green (80 feet away) and we discuss the read. i had it going slightly right, he had it going slightly left. i had just left my par putt on 12 one roll short. played it middle right and the ball backboards in. fist pump, hair flip, foot stomp, F bomb. we're (-1).

 

- after another rain delay, we get to 15. drew pulls his driver a bit left and we can't see it. should be fine, but i hit 3w just in case. and i just mash it. we get up there, find drew's ball. i've got 107 stick, just over the minge.

 

me: 107? i love that number. that's a great number. this is gonna be a good shot.

drew: <smiling> ok, great. let's do it.

me: 107 is my jam. this is a perfect GW. it's already good, i just have to swing.

 

<center face>

 

drew: be good!

me: oooo, it does look good...

 

<ball hits and nestles 10 feet away... high five>

 

drew: so glad you had 107 in.

me: 107 means nothing to me. can't remember the last time i had 107. i was just trying to talk myself into a good shot.

drew: you are hilarious. that's awesome.

 

the happy ending of this hole would have been if i made the putt. instead, i left it DFC, literally on the lip. teeth were gnashed. the hat was violently scrunched down over my eyes. face to hands in despair. we needed that, read it perfect, but it just didn't go. the downhill wasn't enough to push her in.

 

#17: so i'm distraught after that putt. drew hits a laser right at the stick... but it comes down 10 yards short of the green. 188 into the wind, very downhill. i tell myself to let that last hole go. step up and just pipe it. high beauty of a fade, lands middle middle and feeds to the hole. 12 feet. drew kinda mangles his pitch (very difficult) and is talking with obarksky just to the side. obarsky says something like, this is a tough putt here. drew goes (quietly, but loud enough for me to hear him), "i'm not worried about it. eagle's gonna make his putt for bird." :D he was right, i did. fist pump, hair flip, foot stomp, F bomb. big high five. 18 was kinda of a mess for both of us, drew gets us to the house with a par.

 

 

...

 

 

took me awhile to get going, but once i did it was so good. best way i can describe it: i felt like 12 oz of water being poured into an 8 oz glass. everything felt compressed and slightly distorted. the ball was going so much farther for me, which was hard to gauge at the beginning. 100% geeked up. when i finally got straight, the focus became very narrow. repping my Hive golf ball all day was a constant reminder that there were people out there who were rooting drew and i on... great feeling to have. i felt the love boys. barring a riveting game of airwolf or a good match, as much as i want to, i can't manufacture that level of play in a "regular" round of golf. playing in tournaments is just different, and incredibly addictive.

 

this is probably the wrong way to look at it, but for me (right now anyway) tournaments are a pass/fail proposition. at the end of the day, there is a binary answer. mostly, it's a fail. do not pass go, do not collect $100. of course this only makes success all the sweeter.

 

 

tl;dr: drew and i qualified. it was a good time. bartenders at WM are hot.

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3 putts should be the loss of a dot. Can't decide whether that should be for the team or the individual.

 

Loss of a dot for that person, or they give a dot to everybody else?

 

I think putting related junk that goes negative can be tough, because then is everybody supposed to putt everything out? One of the big pluses of games can be people just picking up when it doesn't matter.

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this is probably the wrong way to look at it, but for me (right now anyway) tournaments are a pass/fail proposition. at the end of the day, there is a binary answer. mostly, it's a fail.

OK!

 

 

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I definitely want to play a "bugler". Farting when your ball is in the air. Par or better = dot.

 

quad point penalty if you end up deucing your pants while trying to get a bugler.

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tl;dr: drew and i qualified.

Mostly, congrats.

 

When and where is the next one and what's the field size?

 

Are you only eligible for Gross in that one, or is net back in play?

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It should only apply when a 3rd putt is necessary (in the most likely scenario, to tie a hole).

 

I definitely want to play a "bugler". Farting when your ball is in the air. Par or better = dot.

 

quad point penalty if you end up deucing your pants while trying to get a bugler.

 

If you s*** your pants during the round, everyone gives you $20 and you leave immediately.

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American Vandal, Season 2 : The Turd Burglar.

 

Previews are up. That's not a joke. AVS1 was best show of 2017.

 

 

Would just like to reiterate this. Not a big fan of crime shows, but AV season 1 was terrific.

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tl;dr: drew and i qualified.

Mostly, congrats.

 

When and where is the next one and what's the field size?

 

Are you only eligible for Gross in that one, or is net back in play?

 

pretty funny that we shot 70 as our better ball, and you shot 70 on your own the next am. different tees, but still. :)

 

only eligible for gross as far as i know. which is fine. i don't think we'd have a chance at net and i don't have to concern myself with anyone being a bagger. 61 won net on friday. mark r. and ash shot 63 net and lost in a playoff.

 

md cup championship is at blue mash on the 23rd (day after the Hive's CC). the team that wins (gross and net divisions) gets an annual membership to all 5 participating courses (blue mash, pb dye, worthington, musket ridge, maryland national). the initial entry fee covered both rounds, so no more out of pocket costs.

 

field size is as of yet undetermined, but based on what i've heard, approx. 12 teams so far in each flight. there's one more qualifier at maryland national on the 7th, so probably around 16 teams/division.

 

 

anyone got any tips on blue mash? ;) i just like talking about the tournament site. gives me new stuff to think about before i fall asleep.

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The BPPQ - When you leave the hole at any point to drop a a deuce and make a par or better, you get a dot

 

The 827 - When you leave the course at any point due to diarrhea (likely from a bad Whiskey River BBQ burger, or batch of Pizza Hut pasta the night before), you give a dot to everybody for each hole for the duration of your absence

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Are the results posted somewhere for Friday? I remember looking at it when it was first advertised, but would've been tough to get off that day and/or tough to find a partner.

 

Good luck at BM!

 

there haven't been any results posted anywhere for a single qualifier. kind of shockingly bad, even by my laisse faire standards. it's the first year of this thing, so gonna give them a pass. they do need a centralized website for that info.

 

and thanks!

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How did the scoring work with regards to the junk? Is whatever junk that applies to the score that counts for the team on a given hole all that matters?

 

Say one team gets a greenie par, and one gets a par where they get up and down (not from a bunker). The hole is tied, but does the team with the greenie par get a dot on that hole?

 

Are birdies and eagles only for gross, or do you give dots for net as well?

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If you have carry overs what do you do if it carries through 18 and 18 is a push?

 

We had this discussion in a skins round last week when we had 5 skins outstanding after 18 was a push. Two people argued it should be split among the two guys that pushed 18. Two said they should just be hanging out there until the next match. Which was nearly impossible to schedule.

 

So naturally the conversation about what to do about pushed skins on the final hole...was a push.

 

Granted they were only dollar skins and it was the Himilayas Putting Course...but it seemed important at the time.

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