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That one guy you HATE playing with...


caeye0710

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I hadn’t thought too much about this, but many go through this stage. In my 20s, we were stuck at work for 15-16 hours per day, and most of us were too busy to be depressed? That might be one solution? Later in life, quite a few confessed that without the business life they could easily have fallen into depression.

You are definitely not alone. Your story may even help others in their mid-20s.

Thank you for sharing.

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Same here in Switzerland, Germany, Austria, without the 5 hcp thing

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If you're not playing for anything who cares what he does?

Personally, I think if you're going to "set it up" in the bunkers, you just allow it regardless of the lie. Especially if you have an entire group; unambiguous uniformity is best. It becomes too subjective if you try to pick and choose on a case-by-case which lie is worthy of relief and which should be played as is.

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Yea, I get it and is fine within your own foursome. My point is in a larger group it becomes too subjective and applied inconsistently. Better to just play it "up" in bunkers w/ scorecard length relief

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Two players I dislike playing with. The first is the player who takes too long to do anything. No ready golf mindset. Still fumbling with whatever and when it’s his time, he has no clue what club to hit, he is testing the wind, and takes about 2-4 practices before each shot. The second is your get to the course so I can get wasted player. Gets annoyingly loud to the point that other groups are staring at who the loud guy is. I’m okay with drinking as I do so myself but when it comes a point to where you just don’t have a volume control anywhere on the course including the club house, it wears thin quick.

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I agree with most about the loud, angry, club throwing fools. Today though we experience a new kind of "that guy". We had a scheduled tee time at 8:00 am. At 7:55 he still hadn't shown. We callrf and he said, "oh sorry, I got messed up (drunk) last night. Sorry". He didn't bother to text or call. I won't wait for the door to hit him on the way out. There was another guy we turned away because we thought we had 4.

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Guy 1

The guy that always pulls into the parking lot just when everyone in the group if suppose to tee off and expects everyone to wait on him.That guy above who is a slow player and/or wants to blast music loudly during the round.That guy above who is always in a hurry to leave after putting out on 18.Guy 2

The guy who shows up at the course during the busiest time of the weekend and expects to get paired with a group immediately.The guy above who realizes he is missing some clubs from his bag (including his driver and putter).The guy above who is in poor shape physically and is going to walk.The guy above during this Covid epidemic has the nerve to ask can I borrow your putter?

 

 

 

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What works for me is commenting on it when it happens, but in a way that makes fun of it in a lighthearted manner. Make it seem like you're roasting him in a jovial and funny way, but that it doesn't bother you. It takes some creative thinking but is pretty effective because it's not a confrontation, but the guy won't want to get made fun of.

If that doesn't work you need to talk to your friends.

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I’ve played this great game for 52 years and only encountered two guys I couldn’t tolerate playing with.

The first guy took an excessive amount of time to play each shot. This includes each putt, as well. I am not exaggerating, he’d take a full minute to size up each shot before drawing a club, then once he addressed the ball, he’d fidget with his alignment. Finally, he would freeze over the ball for quite a long time before drawing the club back. Full swing shots NEVER took less than 3-minutes. Every round with him was a marathon round. When he left our club, there was a collective cheer!

The second guy was a ticking time bomb. He was a capable enough player at 4-handicap, but his temper was legendary. Profanity laced club throwing tirades were a part of every round with this turkey. He too has moved on from our club and we are all better for it.

 

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  • 2 weeks later...

My two pet peeves are slow players and what I call social golfers. Sometimes they are the same guy. I played on Wednesday with a guy who I know fairly well, but I haven't played with him very much. He talked constantly and was more interested in telling stories than focusing on his game. He shot 98 to my 80. I actually gave him a couple of mulligans and a few three foot putts just to keep him moving. He's a nice guy, but hopefully I can avoid playing with him in the future.

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Slow, hits 3 balls a hole from the same place because he keeps skulling it, if he kept real score would be 200. A relative so can't always avoid playing with him. If stuck with him in a family round I always suggest a scramble. Otherwise a great guy.

Otherwise the annoying guys are one offs I may get paired with and never see again. Loud and drunk aren't fun unless you're the loud drunk.

 

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I had a bit of an opposite situation happen this past Sunday and wound up with a "glad I didn't play with" story. So Saturday afternoon I hop online to see if I can get lumped in as a single Sunday morning. I find a spot with a threesome and booked it. I get to the tee a few minutes before our tee time and check in with the starter who waves his hand toward 3 guys lingering by the tee, a younger guy around 30 and apparently his dad and uncle. I catch the dad's eye and mention that it looks like I'm playing with them today. He gives me this look like either he didn't hear me or didn't understand what I said so I repeated myself to which he replies, "we're practicing social distancing." In my head I was like "great, we all are". Not really all that hard to do on a golf course. But then he says it again because apparently his kid's wife is pregnant. I had overheard them talking about him becoming a dad a minute earlier so in my head I'm thinking, ok, give this kid his space and then the younger guy chimes in saying that he booked a foursome and his buddy was on his way. I was just kind of dumbfounded.

The starter then asks if there is a problem and I told him that these guys just told me they've got a foursome. He looks at his sheet and it only shows a threesome plus a single (me) and he's only got slips for those people. The young guy then starts pointing at his phone saying he booked his foursome 2 weeks ago (course's site only allows 7 days advance tee times) and what is he supposed to tell his buddy who is 2 minutes out. The starter wasn't having it but at this point I wasn't going out with these guys either way. Finally, the starter comes to me and says, "You don't want to play with these guys, right" and I was like nope. It is a packed day but he promises to get me out and starts checking with the starter on the other 18 at the course. While that's going on the threesome is about to tee off and the younger guy feels like he needs to put the icing on the cake and says to me, "You don't want to be near me anyways, bro, I just got off a flight from LAX." Ummmmmm, ok.

They head off and 2 minutes later the starter has done some magic and split 2 paired twosomes so he could create a threesome with me and we wound up next on the tee. I ended up with a guy around my age and his father and we wound up having a pleasant round together. As we broke off after the 18th I mentioned to them "I think I lucked out today" and they agreed. I will say this, the guys that ditched me did send the cart girl over with a beer for me at the 3rd tee so I have to give them that. Oh, and the guy's "buddy" never showed. I'm very worried about him.

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I have a couple:

 

The guy who brags he just beat you on the hole, but doesnt count the 3 foot wedges or dropped balls. I don't care what you shoot, but dont try and brag to me and the group or try and show me up when its clear you did not count some strokes. Dont play with those types much any more.

 

My recent has been an old time friend and I have had to tell him multiple times, do not give me any swing advice. I havent asked and you sound like an arrogant jerk giving advice to someone who has not once asked you for it. These types drive me mad because often, they arent the best player in the group, they arent shooting par or close to it and often have this huge ego for no reason. I've been tempted to have him out with another buddy of mine, to see what a real golfer acts like (ie, no excuses for crappy lies, or butterflies farting near his ears, etc), but I dont think it would be a good day for anyone. He is a friend of mine, so Ill be having one more talk with him, but like many of you have said lifes too short to not enjoy something and if after a conversation they continue to annoy you, drop them like a bad habit for golf (keep them around for everything else that friends do).

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  • 2 weeks later...

I say talk to your buddies and tell them you can't play in the group anymore because of him. If he hasn't learned proper etiquette in the time you've had to play with him, I wouldn't entertain it any longer. I used to be very passive but now that I have gotten older (46) I just don't take s*** any more lol. Find someone else to play with if your buddies don't understand. I've met some great players and people I call friends by playing as a single and getting paired up with them. 

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I was the guy to organize our golf trips. Usually 8 players but sometimes it was the 4 of us(the core serious golfers that were ALWAYS in. We always had a season long side bet going). For those of you that organize you know that it takes hours upon hours to sync up schedules, make/negotiate tee times, lodging, car rental, setting up games for all the handicaps involved, taking into account all of the suggestions, SB party arrangements etc. I actually enjoyed putting the trips together because I was creating something that all of us enjoyed. 3 trips to Vegas. Arcadia Bluffs. Sand Valley. San Diego. Palm Desert. John Deere x 3. Eagle Ridge twice. Yes we were based out of Chicago.

 

Eventually it became so competitive that cheating became an issue. Dropping balls. "Finding" balls that were impossibly alive. Carding wrong scores. Illegal drops to give yourself a better lie. Accusing me of cheating when he was the one who agreed on the ruling on the course but after I parred the hole he decided to double back on what he agreed to. And then the straw that broke the camel's back. The last trip we were in Vegas and someone stole $200 out of my wallet. One of the seven guys that I considered a friend actually stole money out of my wallet. 

 

I just walked away. It was made easy because I moved to Dallas to be closer to family. I did had the courtesy to clear the air in an email instead of just cold walking away. That was it. The accumulation of crap started to effect my enjoyment of the game. Only once in my life have i ever been on the course playing and sincerely wishing that I was not playing and it was that last round in Vegas. We had tons of fun together. We had similar handicaps and we all really love playing golf....but it got to a point where I just couldn't stand the thought of teeing it up with that group again because of the potential negatives. Don't get me wrong. Those trips were THE most fun I have ever had playing golf. I have very fond memories but it degenerated into something that outweighed the positives. 

 

All this just to say....walk away and enjoy the game you love. I play weekly with my guys in Dallas now and we plan on making a trip to Pebble, Vegas and Arizona. Don't be afraid to try and address your group dynamic and if that doesn't work...move on. We only have limited number of rounds to play. Don't waste them on people that you know will pull you down!

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My trigger lately has been for people who want to convince you they know ALL the stuff...not just golf and that you NEED to agree with them.  I don't mind people sharing opinions or why they believe what they do regardless of topic, but I get irked when they feel the need to try and make me believe what they do.  


Since the new Bill and Ted movie is getting released, I've been trying to adopt their motto and "Be excellent to each other" but it sure can be tough sometimes. 

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This Saturday me and my buddy were paired with a twosome, very nice guys, but every 2 or 3 holes one of them brought up politics. Tried just replying with yup and um hmm, but that really didn't get the hint.

 

I don't mind a good conversation and find them stimulating but with someone I just met it's hard to know how they'll react and that can derail a round immediately. 

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