A miserable, depressed golfer....!

[benden]

Good evening to all in the 'counselors' corner.

 

How do you deal with a depressed, negative playing partner?

 

You know the sort.....

 

WHY IS THE BALL GOING THERE!

WHY AREN'T I HITTING IT WELL TODAY!

WHERE IS MY BALL, GODDAMIT!

IMPATIENT SHIFTING ABOUT....

HOW COULD I MISS THAT PUTT...IT'S ONLY 3 FEET!!!

 

ETC, ETC.....

 

This guy is the funniest bloke i know, and when he's on form, OMG, golf with him is Fun with a capital F !!!!

 

BUT, he's sooooooo 'variable'. Funny one minute, raging the next, etc!

 

He's a good friend and our wives and kids get on well too.

 

What to do?

[DeNinny]

After a while you just have to completely ignore it all.

[benden]

After a while you just have to completely ignore it all.

 

So i see, DeNinny, so i see.

[braincramp52]

Tell him he's not good enough to get mad.

[DeNinny]

After a while you just have to completely ignore it all.

 

So i see, DeNinny, so i see.

 

I play with a guy like that in my reg foursome. He can't control his golf emotions when things go bad. The other three of us try empathy, joking, calling him out on it, but we have realized it is in his nature. So we now just ignore it and/or change the subject.

[Kaysquare]

Just tell him to "suck it up" and get over himself, then move on.

[MtlJeff]

It's really not that big a deal. One of my closest friends, and literally one of the guys i like the most of anyone i know....is so negative it's an ongoing joke. The best alltime comment he made was one time we were playing in April, and he made a double on a par 5, and he says "all year this hole has been killing me!!!"...LOL, it was like our 3rd round of the year. It's like 6-7 years later and we still make that same joke every single year, when someone bogeys a hole in April, we joke that the hole has been killing us all year...haha

 

You just tune it out...I mean if the guy is a nice guy, its not that big a deal. Some people get emotional on the golf course

[benden]

After a while you just have to completely ignore it all.

 

So i see, DeNinny, so i see.

 

I play with a guy like that in my reg foursome. He can't control his golf emotions when things go bad. The other three of us try empathy, joking, calling him out on it, but we have realized it is in his nature. So we now just ignore it and/or change the subject.

 

This sounds so familiar.

 

I've often been down the 'ignore it' road. Thing is it's me and him, only.

 

Oh well, ce'st la vie, i suppose.

[benden]

It's really not that big a deal. One of my closest friends, and literally one of the guys i like the most of anyone i know....is so negative it's an ongoing joke. The best alltime comment he made was one time we were playing in April, and he made a double on a par 5, and he says "all year this hole has been killing me!!!"...LOL, it was like our 3rd round of the year. It's like 6-7 years later and we still make that same joke every single year, when someone bogeys a hole in April, we joke that the hole has been killing us all year...haha

 

You just tune it out...I mean if the guy is a nice guy, its not that big a deal. Some people get emotional on the golf course

 

Thanks Jeff. That was funny, lol!

 

I swear to God, this guy could start well, then hit a bad shot. I stand there, waiting, for the meltdown! This may go on for the rest of the round, may not, just depends on whether he accepts it. Sometimes, the 'rollercoaster' ride levels off and he accepts his lot in life. When he counts his score, post round, he sees it's not so bad. Come next round he's bouncing round like a spring lamb, can't wait to get started!! Then it all begins again......

 

I know we're all different but i'm a great believer in this saying....

 

Your either born to 'cope' or your born not to 'cope'.

 

The thing is, i'm a 'we're out here and the sun is shining' type. If i play badly, who cares? I'll go home, put my kids to bed and tomorrows another day....

[Palauan Hammer]

I've played with many guys just like this LOL! Nicest people you'll ever meet, decent at golf too but once they hit a bad one they're all up in their own head. The only thing you can really do is tune it out, or try to crack a few jokes. The only problem is I've had the joke around thing backfire, then it's just awkward the rest of the round. I guess take it as a test of your own mental fortitude haha. Good luck Sir!

[benden]

I've played with many guys just like this LOL! Nicest people you'll ever meet, decent at golf too but once they hit a bad one they're all up in their own head. The only thing you can really do is tune it out, or try to crack a few jokes. The only problem is I've had the joke around thing backfire, then it's just awkward the rest of the round. I guess take it as a test of your own mental fortitude haha. Good luck Sir!

 

Thanking you Hammer! And regards to you and yours.

 

Definitely had the jokes thing back fire, lol! I often feel blessed that i've not been on the receiving end of a driver head. :taunt:

[Palauan Hammer]

I've played with many guys just like this LOL! Nicest people you'll ever meet, decent at golf too but once they hit a bad one they're all up in their own head. The only thing you can really do is tune it out, or try to crack a few jokes. The only problem is I've had the joke around thing backfire, then it's just awkward the rest of the round. I guess take it as a test of your own mental fortitude haha. Good luck Sir!

 

Thanking you Hammer! And regards to you and yours.

 

Definitely had the jokes thing back fire, lol! I often feel blessed that i've not been on the receiving end of a driver head. :taunt:

 

Likewise my friend, hope all is well out your way! :) As for me, I'm hanging in there and things will get better, I believe it!

 

Well, all you can do is try your best to ignore it or when he's over at your house perhaps gently bring it up. Sometimes people that have these moods have no idea they're doing it.

[doublepar93]

My usual playing partner, my cousin, is like that. We play new courses a lot and talk it up and get super pumped to play wherever we are playing, but as soon as we get there, and a drive goes off line, or a good shot rolls off the back of the green, he's done for the day. He fusses, and contemplates not playing again. I just ignore it, and bring up other things. We're quite religious, and have done a lot of mission work for poor families. Oddly enough, if I bring that up, and we start talking about memories of that, he calms down.

[mrmacwvu1]

drink more

 

have him drink more

 

problem solved

[thug the bunny]

Everyone plays with a few guys who's normal MO is to complain, vent, and rage to varying degrees. Sometimes it's annoying and distracting, sometimes it's entertaining. That's golf..

[benden]

I've played with many guys just like this LOL! Nicest people you'll ever meet, decent at golf too but once they hit a bad one they're all up in their own head. The only thing you can really do is tune it out, or try to crack a few jokes. The only problem is I've had the joke around thing backfire, then it's just awkward the rest of the round. I guess take it as a test of your own mental fortitude haha. Good luck Sir!

 

Thanking you Hammer! And regards to you and yours.

 

Definitely had the jokes thing back fire, lol! I often feel blessed that i've not been on the receiving end of a driver head. :taunt:

 

Likewise my friend, hope all is well out your way! :) As for me, I'm hanging in there and things will get better, I believe it!

 

Well, all you can do is try your best to ignore it or when he's over at your house perhaps gently bring it up. Sometimes people that have these moods have no idea they're doing it.

 

Things will definitely get better, Hammer.

 

Thanks and kick a** on course!

 

My usual playing partner, my cousin, is like that. We play new courses a lot and talk it up and get super pumped to play wherever we are playing, but as soon as we get there, and a drive goes off line, or a good shot rolls off the back of the green, he's done for the day. He fusses, and contemplates not playing again. I just ignore it, and bring up other things. We're quite religious, and have done a lot of mission work for poor families. Oddly enough, if I bring that up, and we start talking about memories of that, he calms down.

 

Aaah, i'm not alone!!

 

Cheers dude!

[benden]

drink more

 

have him drink more

 

problem solved

 

:taunt: :taunt: !!

 

Only one problem with that idea.....

 

After that, can't hit a golf ball, neither can he.

 

There'd be a murder.

[benden]

Everyone plays with a few guys who's normal MO is to complain, vent, and rage to varying degrees. Sometimes it's annoying and distracting, sometimes it's entertaining. That's golf..

 

Thanks Thug and regards from the UK.

 

Hit it good!

[mrmacwvu1]

if you both drink enough you won't care what you shoot and end up at a tittty bar

[thug the bunny]

Everyone plays with a few guys who's normal MO is to complain, vent, and rage to varying degrees. Sometimes it's annoying and distracting, sometimes it's entertaining. That's golf..

 

I love the way some of these guys deride themselves after a stinker. After working dog excrement and their mothers into the their self directed tirade, I sometimes have to look away while I laugh, not being sure if he might still be in a mood to throw the club.

[benden]

if you both drink enough you won't care what you shoot and end up at a tittty bar

 

And when i walk through the door and my wife finds the 'cage fighter' in her?

[benden]

Everyone plays with a few guys who's normal MO is to complain, vent, and rage to varying degrees. Sometimes it's annoying and distracting, sometimes it's entertaining. That's golf..

 

I love the way some of these guys deride themselves after a stinker. After working dog excrement and their mothers into the their self directed tirade, I sometimes have to look away while I laugh, not being sure if he might still be in a mood to throw the club.

 

Agreed.

 

It's pretty awful to hear!

 

Laughing?? You've got to joking, lol! Caught = Dead....