Make sure your daughter or son is having fun...

[TIM929]

> @Nard_S said:

> Being a full fledged range rat, I've seen this a number of times and it's beyond pathetic.

 

Yes, I see this all the time at the range.. parents are pounding on there kids with bad instruction and remarks with a loud voice not aware of others around them. Then, the kids get smart back and start jabbing at their parents. parents get really angry and pull the plug on the range time or say they’ll wait in the car while stomping off.

 

 

[BigBad]

My son is 9. When he plays we do 2 things. Obviously, we always ride a cart which he loves. On every shot, I lay down an alignment stick behind the ball pointed at his target. Other than that he plays only the holes he wants so if he gets frustrated he will just watch me for a couple of holes. Golf is too hard to push your kids into.

[jbw749]

Absolutely have to keep it fun for the kids or nothing good usually happens. And quit worrying about your own game when you bring your kids to the range. Make them the focus. Don't even bring your clubs.

Also quit bringing your wife to watch you hit balls. I hate that, the poor gal tries to act interested, but would rather be anywhere else. No one likes watching weekend golfers practice, especially the wife and kids.

[CBJ]

Ice hockey is just as bad, when we lived in the Columbus Ohio area, I couldn’t believe how some of the parents acted and conducted themselves, we just move to the Dallas TX area, so it remains to be seen how the hockey parents will act here. I have a 9 year old son, he loves playing golf and loves playing ice hockey. My only rules with him at this age for both sports are to teach him proper etiquette, be a good team mate, have a good attitude, and to have fun, he gets discouraged easily, when his attitude starts to go south on the golf course, he takes a break, he might take a hole off, I let him drive the cart, etc..

 

Most importantly, I do not give my son any lessons, I worked in the golf industry in the late 90’s, taught lessons, played college golf, and was a good competitive club pro golfer in the local sections. I want to be his dad, not his coach, I will occasionally remind him on what he is working on with his golf or hockey coaches, only if he asks me.

 

I leave the coaching to the coaches, by doing this, it has helped tremendously for the enjoyment of playing the sport, there are no expectations, if he has golf/hockey issues, i have him write them down, and he/we talk with his coaches.

[dpb5031]

> @CMCSGolf said:

> It should be illegal for parents to go to the range with a young child and not bring their own clubs. If Dad doesn't have his sticks, it's a dead giveaway that the kid is about to have a miserable 30-60 minutes. When kids are young, they love playing with their parents. So it seems like the best way to build love for golf is to play with them and hope they pick it up. Lecturing them on things they aren't old enough to understand is obviously not the answer.

 

I disagree. I found it a waste of time and a distraction to bring my clubs to the range or even out on the course with my daughter. She wanted me to watch every one of her shots!

 

I agree in making it fun though, not a job. It's a tough balance. You need to push enough to get them to stick with it at times. Kids are impulsive and their interest level will naturally go up and down. Yes, there are many over-the-top obnoxious parents, but the dad shaming on this topic can get a little over-the-top as well.

[MountainKing]

> @DavePelz4 said:

> > @MountainKing said:

> > Range at Bolingbrook?

>

> Of course...my home away from home.

 

When I lived in Bolingbrook that was my range 3-4 times a week. Sadly, what you witnessed is not a rare site out there when you get out there a lot. A lot of parents trying to develop the next PGA or LPGA star and the kid with little interest. It makes me so sad to hear your story and see it. The crazy part, if parents just invested that money instead of spent it non stop, they'd be able to cover college and then some.

 

I also got to see plenty of it when coaching hockey, I went between Pee Wee and Bantem (11-14 age group) and I can't tell you how many kids I was coaching that had lost all interest in the game by that point, and these kids had some insane talent but were ready to give it up thanks to the parents. In my last year I did finally step up and told one parent of a kid on our team (who like this girl could do nothing right) that they're destroying their kid. I miss coaching, but I stopped because of the parents, I don't miss dealing with them.

[tatertot]

> @MountainKing said:

> > @DavePelz4 said:

> > > @MountainKing said:

> > > Range at Bolingbrook?

> >

> > Of course...my home away from home.

>

> When I lived in Bolingbrook that was my range 3-4 times a week. Sadly, what you witnessed is not a rare site out there when you get out there a lot. A lot of parents trying to develop the next PGA or LPGA star and the kid with little interest. It makes me so sad to hear your story and see it. The crazy part, if parents just invested that money instead of spent it non stop, they'd be able to cover college and then some.

>

> I also got to see plenty of it when coaching hockey, I went between Pee Wee and Bantem (11-14 age group) and I can't tell you how many kids I was coaching that had lost all interest in the game by that point, and these kids had some insane talent but were ready to give it up thanks to the parents. In my last year I did finally step up and told one parent of a kid on our team (who like this girl could do nothing right) that they're destroying their kid. I miss coaching, but I stopped because of the parents, I don't miss dealing with them.

 

After years in youth sports, I've realized the kids are great ... the parents are intolerable. I can't wait to get out.

[rich_s2]

ugh, makes me want to puke. The only time I get the slightest upset is when Ella does not put in any effort. At that point I just ask her if she wants to play or go home. She snaps out of it and we play golf. Does not happen very often. Other than that we have two goals, stay positive and have fun. Parents can really suck when it comes to their kids sports. He is not doing her any favors.

 

@DavePelz4 if you are in Chicago, we should play sometime! I am up in Oshkosh. Meet ya half way or I could head down there.

[CBJ]

> @MountainKing said:

> > @DavePelz4 said:

> > > @MountainKing said:

> > > Range at Bolingbrook?

> >

> > Of course...my home away from home.

>

> When I lived in Bolingbrook that was my range 3-4 times a week. Sadly, what you witnessed is not a rare site out there when you get out there a lot. A lot of parents trying to develop the next PGA or LPGA star and the kid with little interest. It makes me so sad to hear your story and see it. The crazy part, if parents just invested that money instead of spent it non stop, they'd be able to cover college and then some.

>

> I also got to see plenty of it when coaching hockey, I went between Pee Wee and Bantem (11-14 age group) and I can't tell you how many kids I was coaching that had lost all interest in the game by that point, and these kids had some insane talent but were ready to give it up thanks to the parents. In my last year I did finally step up and told one parent of a kid on our team (who like this girl could do nothing right) that they're destroying their kid. I miss coaching, but I stopped because of the parents, I don't miss dealing with them.

 

That is exactly why I don’t coach, I will offer to help out, help keep kids organized, and just be an extra set of eyes, I always tell every kid at least one thing, they did great to keep it positive. Though last weekend, I helped “coach” (keep bench organized and help with shift changes) my sons hockey team in a tournament, it was a 10u tournament and the Dallas AAA 10u team signed up, they are the best of the best, practice year round, pretty impressive to watch. All the other teams were no where close to their talent. They destroyed every team they played, after one of the games, I saw a kid crying and clearly upset, he was the goalie on another team that lost 41-0 against the Dallas AAA team, I went up and told him some of the stuff he was doing well, and not to get too upset. The Dad pulled me aside and said that telling his son that, will make home weak and not help his development, he did thank me for talking with his son, so he wasn’t a d#ck to me, just took me by surprise, as the kid was clearly upset...

[DavePelz4]

I coached Little League baseball for 25 years. Started almost 10 years before my kids were of age. As a young guy, I mistakenly let the parents talk to their kids during practices/games. Once I grew up and had a bit more confidence, I met with the parents before the start of the year and laid down my ground rules which involved them not talking to their kids during practice or games, only cheering the good things their kids did in practice and games and made it 100% clear that the primary purpose was to play up to our potential, have fun, and winning was third. Parents HATED that winning was so low on the priority list. We had a goal for each game that if met, resulted in ice cream. If we were playing a team with poor pitching, we'd need to get so many hits to earn ice cream. It kept kids from standing there with a bat on the shoulder waiting for the 4 pitch walk.

 

Ironically, we won championships 90% of the times and once parents understood the program, they bought into it and mostly supported it.

 

 

[tatertot]

> @CBJ said:

> > @MountainKing said:

> > > @DavePelz4 said:

> > > > @MountainKing said:

> > > > Range at Bolingbrook?

> > >

> > > Of course...my home away from home.

> >

> > When I lived in Bolingbrook that was my range 3-4 times a week. Sadly, what you witnessed is not a rare site out there when you get out there a lot. A lot of parents trying to develop the next PGA or LPGA star and the kid with little interest. It makes me so sad to hear your story and see it. The crazy part, if parents just invested that money instead of spent it non stop, they'd be able to cover college and then some.

> >

> > I also got to see plenty of it when coaching hockey, I went between Pee Wee and Bantem (11-14 age group) and I can't tell you how many kids I was coaching that had lost all interest in the game by that point, and these kids had some insane talent but were ready to give it up thanks to the parents. In my last year I did finally step up and told one parent of a kid on our team (who like this girl could do nothing right) that they're destroying their kid. I miss coaching, but I stopped because of the parents, I don't miss dealing with them.

>

> That is exactly why I don’t coach, I will offer to help out, help keep kids organized, and just be an extra set of eyes, I always tell every kid at least one thing, they did great to keep it positive. Though last weekend, I helped “coach” (keep bench organized and help with shift changes) my sons hockey team in a tournament, it was a 10u tournament and the Dallas AAA 10u team signed up, they are the best of the best, practice year round, pretty impressive to watch. All the other teams were no where close to their talent. They destroyed every team they played, after one of the games, I saw a kid crying and clearly upset, he was the goalie on another team that lost 41-0 against the Dallas AAA team, I went up and told him some of the stuff he was doing well, and not to get too upset. The Dad pulled me aside and said that telling his son that, will make home weak and not help his development, he did thank me for talking with his son, so he wasn’t a d#ck to me, just took me by surprise, as the kid was clearly upset...

 

What does either U10 team possibly learn from a 41-0 hockey game?

[tatertot]

> @CBJ said:

> > @MountainKing said:

> > > @DavePelz4 said:

> > > > @MountainKing said:

> > > > Range at Bolingbrook?

> > >

> > > Of course...my home away from home.

> >

> > When I lived in Bolingbrook that was my range 3-4 times a week. Sadly, what you witnessed is not a rare site out there when you get out there a lot. A lot of parents trying to develop the next PGA or LPGA star and the kid with little interest. It makes me so sad to hear your story and see it. The crazy part, if parents just invested that money instead of spent it non stop, they'd be able to cover college and then some.

> >

> > I also got to see plenty of it when coaching hockey, I went between Pee Wee and Bantem (11-14 age group) and I can't tell you how many kids I was coaching that had lost all interest in the game by that point, and these kids had some insane talent but were ready to give it up thanks to the parents. In my last year I did finally step up and told one parent of a kid on our team (who like this girl could do nothing right) that they're destroying their kid. I miss coaching, but I stopped because of the parents, I don't miss dealing with them.

>

> That is exactly why I don’t coach, I will offer to help out, help keep kids organized, and just be an extra set of eyes, I always tell every kid at least one thing, they did great to keep it positive. Though last weekend, I helped “coach” (keep bench organized and help with shift changes) my sons hockey team in a tournament, it was a 10u tournament and the Dallas AAA 10u team signed up, they are the best of the best, practice year round, pretty impressive to watch. All the other teams were no where close to their talent. They destroyed every team they played, after one of the games, I saw a kid crying and clearly upset, he was the goalie on another team that lost 41-0 against the Dallas AAA team, I went up and told him some of the stuff he was doing well, and not to get too upset. The Dad pulled me aside and said that telling his son that, will make home weak and not help his development, he did thank me for talking with his son, so he wasn’t a d#ck to me, just took me by surprise, as the kid was clearly upset...

 

What does either team learn in a 41-0 U10 hockey team?

[tatertot]

> @CBJ said:

> > @MountainKing said:

> > > @DavePelz4 said:

> > > > @MountainKing said:

> > > > Range at Bolingbrook?

> > >

> > > Of course...my home away from home.

> >

> > When I lived in Bolingbrook that was my range 3-4 times a week. Sadly, what you witnessed is not a rare site out there when you get out there a lot. A lot of parents trying to develop the next PGA or LPGA star and the kid with little interest. It makes me so sad to hear your story and see it. The crazy part, if parents just invested that money instead of spent it non stop, they'd be able to cover college and then some.

> >

> > I also got to see plenty of it when coaching hockey, I went between Pee Wee and Bantem (11-14 age group) and I can't tell you how many kids I was coaching that had lost all interest in the game by that point, and these kids had some insane talent but were ready to give it up thanks to the parents. In my last year I did finally step up and told one parent of a kid on our team (who like this girl could do nothing right) that they're destroying their kid. I miss coaching, but I stopped because of the parents, I don't miss dealing with them.

>

> That is exactly why I don’t coach, I will offer to help out, help keep kids organized, and just be an extra set of eyes, I always tell every kid at least one thing, they did great to keep it positive. Though last weekend, I helped “coach” (keep bench organized and help with shift changes) my sons hockey team in a tournament, it was a 10u tournament and the Dallas AAA 10u team signed up, they are the best of the best, practice year round, pretty impressive to watch. All the other teams were no where close to their talent. They destroyed every team they played, after one of the games, I saw a kid crying and clearly upset, he was the goalie on another team that lost 41-0 against the Dallas AAA team, I went up and told him some of the stuff he was doing well, and not to get too upset. The Dad pulled me aside and said that telling his son that, will make home weak and not help his development, he did thank me for talking with his son, so he wasn’t a d#ck to me, just took me by surprise, as the kid was clearly upset...

 

What does either team learn in a 41-0 U10 hockey game?

[DavePelz4]

> @tatertot said:

> > @CBJ said:

> > > @MountainKing said:

> > > > @DavePelz4 said:

> > > > > @MountainKing said:

> > > > > Range at Bolingbrook?

> > > >

> > > > Of course...my home away from home.

> > >

> > > When I lived in Bolingbrook that was my range 3-4 times a week. Sadly, what you witnessed is not a rare site out there when you get out there a lot. A lot of parents trying to develop the next PGA or LPGA star and the kid with little interest. It makes me so sad to hear your story and see it. The crazy part, if parents just invested that money instead of spent it non stop, they'd be able to cover college and then some.

> > >

> > > I also got to see plenty of it when coaching hockey, I went between Pee Wee and Bantem (11-14 age group) and I can't tell you how many kids I was coaching that had lost all interest in the game by that point, and these kids had some insane talent but were ready to give it up thanks to the parents. In my last year I did finally step up and told one parent of a kid on our team (who like this girl could do nothing right) that they're destroying their kid. I miss coaching, but I stopped because of the parents, I don't miss dealing with them.

> >

> > That is exactly why I don’t coach, I will offer to help out, help keep kids organized, and just be an extra set of eyes, I always tell every kid at least one thing, they did great to keep it positive. Though last weekend, I helped “coach” (keep bench organized and help with shift changes) my sons hockey team in a tournament, it was a 10u tournament and the Dallas AAA 10u team signed up, they are the best of the best, practice year round, pretty impressive to watch. All the other teams were no where close to their talent. They destroyed every team they played, after one of the games, I saw a kid crying and clearly upset, he was the goalie on another team that lost 41-0 against the Dallas AAA team, I went up and told him some of the stuff he was doing well, and not to get too upset. The Dad pulled me aside and said that telling his son that, will make home weak and not help his development, he did thank me for talking with his son, so he wasn’t a d#ck to me, just took me by surprise, as the kid was clearly upset...

>

> What does either team learn in a 41-0 U10 hockey team?

 

How to be gracious winners and losers? Shocked that there isn't a mercy rule in hockey at that level.

[LyinEye]

6 year old on Trackman....lol. Ridiculous!

[Nard_S]

> @TIM929 said:

> > @Nard_S said:

> > Being a full fledged range rat, I've seen this a number of times and it's beyond pathetic.

>

> Yes, I see this all the time at the range.. parents are pounding on there kids with bad instruction and remarks with a loud voice not aware of others around them. Then, the kids get smart back and start jabbing at their parents. parents get really angry and pull the plug on the range time or say they’ll wait in the car while stomping off.

>

>

One time I saw kid belly aching and in tears over how high to tee the ball. The Dad was an "a" hole and they bickered for 20 minutes.

If the kid cannot have the room to enjoy whacking ball to the moon and his/her inner passion is continually stomped on, what is anyone accomplishing?

[JeffreySpicoli]

> @tatertot said:

> > @CBJ said:

> > > @MountainKing said:

> > > > @DavePelz4 said:

> > > > > @MountainKing said:

> > > > > Range at Bolingbrook?

> > > >

> > > > Of course...my home away from home.

> > >

> > > When I lived in Bolingbrook that was my range 3-4 times a week. Sadly, what you witnessed is not a rare site out there when you get out there a lot. A lot of parents trying to develop the next PGA or LPGA star and the kid with little interest. It makes me so sad to hear your story and see it. The crazy part, if parents just invested that money instead of spent it non stop, they'd be able to cover college and then some.

> > >

> > > I also got to see plenty of it when coaching hockey, I went between Pee Wee and Bantem (11-14 age group) and I can't tell you how many kids I was coaching that had lost all interest in the game by that point, and these kids had some insane talent but were ready to give it up thanks to the parents. In my last year I did finally step up and told one parent of a kid on our team (who like this girl could do nothing right) that they're destroying their kid. I miss coaching, but I stopped because of the parents, I don't miss dealing with them.

> >

> > That is exactly why I don’t coach, I will offer to help out, help keep kids organized, and just be an extra set of eyes, I always tell every kid at least one thing, they did great to keep it positive. Though last weekend, I helped “coach” (keep bench organized and help with shift changes) my sons hockey team in a tournament, it was a 10u tournament and the Dallas AAA 10u team signed up, they are the best of the best, practice year round, pretty impressive to watch. All the other teams were no where close to their talent. They destroyed every team they played, after one of the games, I saw a kid crying and clearly upset, he was the goalie on another team that lost 41-0 against the Dallas AAA team, I went up and told him some of the stuff he was doing well, and not to get too upset. The Dad pulled me aside and said that telling his son that, will make home weak and not help his development, he did thank me for talking with his son, so he wasn’t a d#ck to me, just took me by surprise, as the kid was clearly upset...

>

> What does either team learn in a 41-0 U10 hockey game?

 

Well, the losing team learns a bit about spite and demoralization.

[MountainKing]

> @DavePelz4 said:

> I coached Little League baseball for 25 years. Started almost 10 years before my kids were of age. As a young guy, I mistakenly let the parents talk to their kids during practices/games. Once I grew up and had a bit more confidence, I met with the parents before the start of the year and laid down my ground rules which involved them not talking to their kids during practice or games, only cheering the good things their kids did in practice and games and made it 100% clear that the primary purpose was to play up to our potential, have fun, and winning was third. Parents HATED that winning was so low on the priority list. We had a goal for each game that if met, resulted in ice cream. If we were playing a team with poor pitching, we'd need to get so many hits to earn ice cream. It kept kids from standing there with a bat on the shoulder waiting for the 4 pitch walk.

>

> Ironically, we won championships 90% of the times and once parents understood the program, they bought into it and mostly supported it.

>

>

 

Myself and the other guy I coached with had a very similar mentality. First rule was have fun. I had a parent tell me that he is paying for his kid to win, not to have fun, WTF!. What parents don't understand isn't winning isn't always about talent, you develop camaraderie and a real sense of team when you keep things loose and let them have fun. They're more open to be being coached when they're that way, and all that results in is good team work and winning games. We did very well in big tournaments and always went deep in the playoffs, even the years we had teams that had no business going deep. The goal of the parent should be to help the kid develop, but let them guide the way, get the kid to the point where they're begging to go practice and play. If they don't get to that point, then help guide them to something they can be passionate about and enjoy.

[CMCSGolf]

> @dpb5031 said:

> > @CMCSGolf said:

> > It should be illegal for parents to go to the range with a young child and not bring their own clubs. If Dad doesn't have his sticks, it's a dead giveaway that the kid is about to have a miserable 30-60 minutes. When kids are young, they love playing with their parents. So it seems like the best way to build love for golf is to play with them and hope they pick it up. Lecturing them on things they aren't old enough to understand is obviously not the answer.

>

> I disagree. I found it a waste of time and a distraction to bring my clubs to the range or even out on the course with my daughter. She wanted me to watch every one of her shots!

>

> I agree in making it fun though, not a job. It's a tough balance. You need to push enough to get them to stick with it at times. Kids are impulsive and their interest level will naturally go up and down. Yes, there are many over-the-top obnoxious parents, but the dad shaming on this topic can get a little over-the-top as well.

 

That's great and I hope your daughter loves the game, but I think you are the exception. I haven't seen a lot of fathers at the range without their clubs who are hands off. It's just not a lot of fun to do something when your parent is standing over your shoulder at every moment. You develop passion and love for something by spending a lot of time with it and learning yourself. Not a lot of people would love golf if every shot was watched by your superior with a waiting critique.

 

Obviously there are exceptions, but more often than not a dad there without clubs is going to add more pressure than fun to the situation.

[DavePelz4]

> @MountainKing said:

> > @DavePelz4 said:

> > I coached Little League baseball for 25 years. Started almost 10 years before my kids were of age. As a young guy, I mistakenly let the parents talk to their kids during practices/games. Once I grew up and had a bit more confidence, I met with the parents before the start of the year and laid down my ground rules which involved them not talking to their kids during practice or games, only cheering the good things their kids did in practice and games and made it 100% clear that the primary purpose was to play up to our potential, have fun, and winning was third. Parents HATED that winning was so low on the priority list. We had a goal for each game that if met, resulted in ice cream. If we were playing a team with poor pitching, we'd need to get so many hits to earn ice cream. It kept kids from standing there with a bat on the shoulder waiting for the 4 pitch walk.

> >

> > Ironically, we won championships 90% of the times and once parents understood the program, they bought into it and mostly supported it.

> >

> >

>

> Myself and the other guy I coached with had a very similar mentality. First rule was have fun. I had a parent tell me that he is paying for his kid to win, not to have fun, WTF!. What parents don't understand isn't winning isn't always about talent, you develop camaraderie and a real sense of team when you keep things loose and let them have fun. They're more open to be being coached when they're that way, and all that results in is good team work and winning games. We did very well in big tournaments and always went deep in the playoffs, even the years we had teams that had no business going deep. The goal of the parent should be to help the kid develop, but let them guide the way, get the kid to the point where they're begging to go practice and play. If they don't get to that point, then help guide them to something they can be passionate about and enjoy.

 

So my all time favorite coaching story was when my oldest turned 10 and I started coaching him in LIttle League. Because I was new to coaching in this city and the league, they gave me a team with kids who didn't know left field from shortstop. No tryouts, here's your team. They were literally the kids no one wanted. In our first game, which lasted 4 innings, we got beat 36-1 by the team that won the league championship for the 3 years prior. Their manager was a class A d*** who was still stealing bases after they had a 30 run lead. His son was the "star" pitcher.

 

After the game I had 15 kids crying and I told them if they did their best, we'd have our day. We improved each practice and game and somehow made it into the playoffs. We got to the championship game against, you guessed it, the same team who beat us 36-1. It's the only game where I never did a pre-game talk or laid out a game plan. The kids were SO incredibly focused and hungry. In the 5th inning of a 0-0 game we scored 3 runs off the same star pitcher. After the inning his Dad berated him until his son was in tears. In the bottom of the 6th, their star hitter who was 6'1" and about 200 pounds at 12 years old came up with 2 guys on and 2 outs. Tying run and this kid was good. We pitched around him in his first 2 at bats. I walked out to the mound to talk to my pitcher and before getting a word out he said, and I quote, "Coach go sit the **** down. I will strike this son of a ***** out on 4 pitches." There was nothing better that could be said so I went back and settled in.

 

The first pitch was a fastball right at the kid's head. He got out of the way but you could tell it shook him. He took the next two pitches which were both strikes, looking. Our pitcher, Eddie, looked at me and gave me a signal for a pitch we used once a game at most. He threw an ephesus pitch that Tom Seaver would have been proud of and the kid swung and missed it by 2 feet. The worst team in the league with the least talent won the championship against the best team with the most talent. The opposing coach wouldn't shake my hand after the game but his wife came over to me and apologized for her d*** of a husband. My guess is that wasn't her first apology.

 

After the game Eddie's Dad came up and asked what his son said when I went to talk with him. I said he thought he could get him out so I didn't say anything. He knew I was lying but hey, I gotta protect the team.

[PowderedToastMan]

> @DavePelz4 said:

> > @MountainKing said:

> > > @DavePelz4 said:

> > > I coached Little League baseball for 25 years. Started almost 10 years before my kids were of age. As a young guy, I mistakenly let the parents talk to their kids during practices/games. Once I grew up and had a bit more confidence, I met with the parents before the start of the year and laid down my ground rules which involved them not talking to their kids during practice or games, only cheering the good things their kids did in practice and games and made it 100% clear that the primary purpose was to play up to our potential, have fun, and winning was third. Parents HATED that winning was so low on the priority list. We had a goal for each game that if met, resulted in ice cream. If we were playing a team with poor pitching, we'd need to get so many hits to earn ice cream. It kept kids from standing there with a bat on the shoulder waiting for the 4 pitch walk.

> > >

> > > Ironically, we won championships 90% of the times and once parents understood the program, they bought into it and mostly supported it.

> > >

> > >

> >

> > Myself and the other guy I coached with had a very similar mentality. First rule was have fun. I had a parent tell me that he is paying for his kid to win, not to have fun, WTF!. What parents don't understand isn't winning isn't always about talent, you develop camaraderie and a real sense of team when you keep things loose and let them have fun. They're more open to be being coached when they're that way, and all that results in is good team work and winning games. We did very well in big tournaments and always went deep in the playoffs, even the years we had teams that had no business going deep. The goal of the parent should be to help the kid develop, but let them guide the way, get the kid to the point where they're begging to go practice and play. If they don't get to that point, then help guide them to something they can be passionate about and enjoy.

>

> So my all time favorite coaching story was when my oldest turned 10 and I started coaching him in LIttle League. Because I was new to coaching in this city and the league, they gave me a team with kids who didn't know left field from shortstop. No tryouts, here's your team. They were literally the kids no one wanted. In our first game, which lasted 4 innings, we got beat 36-1 by the team that won the league championship for the 3 years prior. Their manager was a class A d*** who was still stealing bases after they had a 30 run lead. His son was the "star" pitcher.

>

> After the game I had 15 kids crying and I told them if they did their best, we'd have our day. We improved each practice and game and somehow made it into the playoffs. We got to the championship game against, you guessed it, the same team who beat us 36-1. It's the only game where I never did a pre-game talk or laid out a game plan. The kids were SO incredibly focused and hungry. In the 5th inning of a 0-0 game we scored 3 runs off the same star pitcher. After the inning his Dad berated him until his son was in tears. In the bottom of the 6th, their star hitter who was 6'1" and about 200 pounds at 12 years old came up with 2 guys on and 2 outs. Tying run and this kid was good. We pitched around him in his first 2 at bats. I walked out to the mound to talk to my pitcher and before getting a word out he said, and I quote, "Coach go sit the **** down. I will strike this son of a ***** out on 4 pitches." There was nothing better that could be said so I went back and settled in.

>

> The first pitch was a fastball right at the kid's head. He got out of the way but you could tell it shook him. He took the next two pitches which were both strikes, looking. Our pitcher, Eddie, looked at me and gave me a signal for a pitch we used once a game at most. He threw an ephesus pitch that Tom Seaver would have been proud of and the kid swung and missed it by 2 feet. The worst team in the league with the least talent won the championship against the best team with the most talent. The opposing coach wouldn't shake my hand after the game but his wife came over to me and apologized for her d*** of a husband. My guess is that wasn't her first apology.

>

> After the game Eddie's Dad came up and asked what his son said when I went to talk with him. I said he thought he could get him out so I didn't say anything. He knew I was lying but hey, I gotta protect the team.

 

I feel like I’ve seen this movie. Wasn’t it a movie?

 

 

[gsea33]

Guy's an ass swipe no question. Son is 12 been playing since 7. Never said word one to him actually played with a baseball grip till is first year at golf camp and "Coach " showed him an overlap grip. Just hit it and find it. He now can really play all while having fun. "Teacher leave us kids alone". Dads like this need a life.

P.S. Was a coach for basketball from CYO to D2 could write a book about the ass wipe parents. Girl's parents are the worst trust me.

[dpb5031]

> @CMCSGolf said:

> > @dpb5031 said:

> > > @CMCSGolf said:

> > > It should be illegal for parents to go to the range with a young child and not bring their own clubs. If Dad doesn't have his sticks, it's a dead giveaway that the kid is about to have a miserable 30-60 minutes. When kids are young, they love playing with their parents. So it seems like the best way to build love for golf is to play with them and hope they pick it up. Lecturing them on things they aren't old enough to understand is obviously not the answer.

> >

> > I disagree. I found it a waste of time and a distraction to bring my clubs to the range or even out on the course with my daughter. She wanted me to watch every one of her shots!

> >

> > I agree in making it fun though, not a job. It's a tough balance. You need to push enough to get them to stick with it at times. Kids are impulsive and their interest level will naturally go up and down. Yes, there are many over-the-top obnoxious parents, but the dad shaming on this topic can get a little over-the-top as well.

>

> That's great and I hope your daughter loves the game, but I think you are the exception. I haven't seen a lot of fathers at the range without their clubs who are hands off. It's just not a lot of fun to do something when your parent is standing over your shoulder at every moment. You develop passion and love for something by spending a lot of time with it and learning yourself. Not a lot of people would love golf if every shot was watched by your superior with a waiting critique.

>

> Obviously there are exceptions, but more often than not a dad there without clubs is going to add more pressure than fun to the situation.

 

Well, I dont know if I was the exception, but my daughter may have been. Every kid is different. She has always been very coachable, wanted me to watch her, and actually constantly requested feedback. And BTW, at 9, 10, 11 years old we're not talking marathon range sessions, just maybe 15-20 min or 5-6 holes on the course. Total waste of time for me to be fussing with my own game; I learned early on that bringing my clubs didnt do either one of us any good. I also thought very consciously that in terms of commentary, less was more. I'd recommend to other dads nearly a dozen compliments for every one 'suggestion/critique."

 

Fast forward to today and my daughter is a rising college junior playing D1 golf on a full ride. At this point we enjoy the game together and are competitive from the same tees, and I'm a 1 HC. In fact, we're playing together later today at one of the top courses in the state.

[SNIPERBBB]

When I was officiating a lot of youth league and all-star youth basketball tournaments, these kind of parents are what my brother and I coined as the 18-year, get-rick-quick scheme parents. The sad thing was of the kids with such parents, they weren't usually the better players of the team, let alone in the league.

 

Also sad is that this isnt a new thing, its just worse because technology and youtube make these parents think they know more than they actually do. I remember back 20 some years ago when I was in 7th grade playing in the finals of the area's junior high valentines day tournament. The best player of the opposing team HATED basketball. IIRC that game was a 2-3 point game then entire way until the end where we pulled away in the last minute or two. Every time I think of that I just wonder how badly that game could of gone for us had the kid had an enthusiasm for the game instead of playing because he was made to.

[SNIPERBBB]

> @gsea33 said:

> Girl's parents are the worst trust me.

 

Surely not.

[J13]

Dad of the year for getting a trackman haha

[Kevlar10]

I played 9 with my kids the other day and it tries your patience. My kids love to just go out and rip it. I try to let them have fun as long as they have a little respect. I also coach baseball and the same as when I coach, I feel it’s better to stick with one thought and focus on that. For instance, my older son hits his irons and driver pretty well except when he pulls his head up during the swing so I just repeat, keep your head down on the ball.

Golf is supposed to be fun.

[Forged4ever]

No soapbox Dave, just observations from a “normal” well adjusted adult male, father & golfer.

 

It’s pathetic and this is why Madison rejects approximately 44%+(actually 44.64%) of the parents that she interviews prior to accepting their children as students.

 

That’s almost half the parents that she speaks with who have their heads so far up their a**** that they’d need a commercial neuro@nal extractor to get em out?

 

I was thinking of gettin one, doing the extraction and then sending em back for a second interview, lol

 

I mean it’s not like we couldn’t use the money?

 

Stay well brother and I hope that you’re having a nice season⛳️

RP

[rkodavey]

> @CMCSGolf said:

>I haven't seen a lot of fathers at the range without their clubs who are hands off. It's just not a lot of fun to do something when your parent is standing over your shoulder at every moment. You develop passion and love for something by spending a lot of time with it and learning yourself. Not a lot of people would love golf if every shot was watched by your superior with a waiting critique.

>

I recently stopped bringing my clubs to the range with my four year old son because he always wants to use my clubs (which are an inch longer than standard) instead of his. Plus he likes to run around a bit and I need to keep my eye on him to make sure he doesn't get whacked in the head by someone. Still, I just let the kid hit balls, and the only comment he hears from me is, "Good shot buddy!" The joys of being a dad-golfer, I suppose! :smile:

 

You can also add the word "Wife" to the title of this thread. To me, watching husbands on the range with their wives is the most cringeworthy thing I ever see. It seems that most of them have to give them some kind of "tip" after every single shot they hit, and the tone they speak to them in just sounds like they're mad at them. I often wonder if that's how they speak to them all the time. A bit sad, really.

[MountainKing]

> @DavePelz4 said:

> > @MountainKing said:

> > > @DavePelz4 said:

> > > I coached Little League baseball for 25 years. Started almost 10 years before my kids were of age. As a young guy, I mistakenly let the parents talk to their kids during practices/games. Once I grew up and had a bit more confidence, I met with the parents before the start of the year and laid down my ground rules which involved them not talking to their kids during practice or games, only cheering the good things their kids did in practice and games and made it 100% clear that the primary purpose was to play up to our potential, have fun, and winning was third. Parents HATED that winning was so low on the priority list. We had a goal for each game that if met, resulted in ice cream. If we were playing a team with poor pitching, we'd need to get so many hits to earn ice cream. It kept kids from standing there with a bat on the shoulder waiting for the 4 pitch walk.

> > >

> > > Ironically, we won championships 90% of the times and once parents understood the program, they bought into it and mostly supported it.

> > >

> > >

> >

> > Myself and the other guy I coached with had a very similar mentality. First rule was have fun. I had a parent tell me that he is paying for his kid to win, not to have fun, WTF!. What parents don't understand isn't winning isn't always about talent, you develop camaraderie and a real sense of team when you keep things loose and let them have fun. They're more open to be being coached when they're that way, and all that results in is good team work and winning games. We did very well in big tournaments and always went deep in the playoffs, even the years we had teams that had no business going deep. The goal of the parent should be to help the kid develop, but let them guide the way, get the kid to the point where they're begging to go practice and play. If they don't get to that point, then help guide them to something they can be passionate about and enjoy.

>

> So my all time favorite coaching story was when my oldest turned 10 and I started coaching him in LIttle League. Because I was new to coaching in this city and the league, they gave me a team with kids who didn't know left field from shortstop. No tryouts, here's your team. They were literally the kids no one wanted. In our first game, which lasted 4 innings, we got beat 36-1 by the team that won the league championship for the 3 years prior. Their manager was a class A d*** who was still stealing bases after they had a 30 run lead. His son was the "star" pitcher.

>

> After the game I had 15 kids crying and I told them if they did their best, we'd have our day. We improved each practice and game and somehow made it into the playoffs. We got to the championship game against, you guessed it, the same team who beat us 36-1. It's the only game where I never did a pre-game talk or laid out a game plan. The kids were SO incredibly focused and hungry. In the 5th inning of a 0-0 game we scored 3 runs off the same star pitcher. After the inning his Dad berated him until his son was in tears. In the bottom of the 6th, their star hitter who was 6'1" and about 200 pounds at 12 years old came up with 2 guys on and 2 outs. Tying run and this kid was good. We pitched around him in his first 2 at bats. I walked out to the mound to talk to my pitcher and before getting a word out he said, and I quote, "Coach go sit the **** down. I will strike this son of a ***** out on 4 pitches." There was nothing better that could be said so I went back and settled in.

>

> The first pitch was a fastball right at the kid's head. He got out of the way but you could tell it shook him. He took the next two pitches which were both strikes, looking. Our pitcher, Eddie, looked at me and gave me a signal for a pitch we used once a game at most. He threw an ephesus pitch that Tom Seaver would have been proud of and the kid swung and missed it by 2 feet. The worst team in the league with the least talent won the championship against the best team with the most talent. The opposing coach wouldn't shake my hand after the game but his wife came over to me and apologized for her d*** of a husband. My guess is that wasn't her first apology.

>

> After the game Eddie's Dad came up and asked what his son said when I went to talk with him. I said he thought he could get him out so I didn't say anything. He knew I was lying but hey, I gotta protect the team.

 

I love this story so much