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Discouraged and Dismayed

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Stop worrying about what the swing looks like. As long as the shots are well struck and heading toward the intended target, that is all that matters. There are no pictures on the scorecard.

It would probably help to adjust your mindset related to on-course results. For example, on Saturday I crushed my first tee shot, with a pull left into trees and well out of bounds. I then proceeded to hit my second tee ball right down the middle because the second shot is always perfect and went on to card a 7 on the opening par 5. Instead of lamenting over the double, I took the positive of parring the second ball on a tough opening hole.

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I play in a group of about 40 guys ranging in age from 60 to 80 years old ( maximum hcp 14, majority single digit). Some of us work really hard on our game, some of us not very much. We all play virtu

I’ve been there. Honestly the best advice for me was to take some time off. Get back to appreciating things other than golf. And when the time was right I started playing again.

Identify one swing thought that tends to help you get a decent trigger and swing some of the time. Not all the time, not foolproof, just something you can build from.Find the easiest/widest/most forg

Like you said, its not Monte or Iteach, its you. You are your own worst enemy. Your "knowledge" of the game is the reason you don't get better. I will bet you every cent I have that if you went to either of them with zero ego, zero preconceived notions and was 100% open to everything they say to you, you would get better...instantly...massively better. Like 99% of every other golfer out there, you think you know things and that is your issue.

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A couple of days ago my ability to practice what I preach was severely tested as I opened up double, double, bogey, double. I was not hitting the ball all that badly just hitting it to places you can't hit it and also missing short game shots and putts. I stood on the 5th tee laughing about my posts on this subject and determined to enjoy my tee shot. I nailed a 3 hybrid into perfect position and then enjoyed the heck out of thinning a nine iron over the green into a creek. Took a drop and pitched on and power lipped out the bogey putt! I did sink the 4 footer for double though!  Anyway I was fairly successful at reacting with humility and I parred the next hole and played my normal game the rest of the way ending up shooting a 45 - 40 - 85 which is at the higher end of my scoring average but perfectly acceptable for my ability level. One bad bounce on the back cost me a couple of strokes but like Forrest said "it happens".

Being able to maintain my composure and play one shot at a time allowed me to have an enjoyable round and also gave me a story to write about here.  I did have all of the usual emotions of "poor me" and "the course is not fair" and so on but I managed to stay humble and not worry about the past holes or shots for the duration of the round. Not sure if I could have stayed sane if I had doubled every hole for the duration of the round though. Hope I don't find out about that one anytime soon! It is a process...

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"Ah, little grasshopper, when you can snatch the pebble from my hand...." ('Kung Fu' TV series from the 60's starring David Carradine).

When that happens, as frustrating as it can be, I challenge myself to see if I can turn it around on the back and play against myself (i.e., back 9 vs. front 9). That level of frustration just not going to let you play well. You have to get over it (I know, easier said than done).

Quote: "The pattern is the same. In an average week, I play one semi-decent round which offers a level of encouragement. I play 6 others that outright stink. I see my coach/instructor on Sunday, and he gives me something to do. I do it 'correctly' a couple of times, and he sends me off to practice more. I do. Then, I play one semi-decent round and 6 more stinkers. How bad do they stink? I was 5 over after 4 holes yesterday. I almost ran out of balls. I threw the last one in the lake and walked off the course.":

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LH Callaway Rogue 5-wood (18*), 7-wood (20*); Aldila Synergy 60-Reg
LH Callaway Rogue Pro 4-AW, Recoil 760 F3
LH Callaway Rogue 19* 3-Hb, Aldila Synergy 60-Reg
LH Cleveland RTX 50*, 54*, 58*
LH Odyssey Double Wide Stroke Lab Putter

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All in your head man, you are overthinking and trying too hard. I bet you stand over the ball with 13 swing thoughts. The best players in the world pick a target and swing. maybe one swing thought if that. In golf there has to be a natural swing and not someone else's mechanics going through your head the entire round. With instructors you have to take their advice and apply it to your swing. With ITeach, you look at many of his students and their swings are nearly the same. they are nearly a carbon copy of his own swing. Its a good swing with great fundamentals but you cant swing like someone else. And as for having a bad attitude on the course, get your s* together. A bad day of golf is better than a great day of work

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A few comments:


I knew a guy with the most beautiful golf swing in the world. Lovely, rhythmic temp. Yet he couldn't hit the ball. It was embarrassing watching him hit golf balls on the range.I knew another whose swing looked like a paralyzed one legged man, but whose handicap was in the single digits.I saw an LPGA pro from Thailand on TV this weekend. She had back problems and swung all "wrong." Way open stance. Swing way inside out. Yet she won the tournament. Clearly there's more to success than technique.I propose that you need to consider the intangibles in the golf swing. Your tempo. The tension in your hands, arms, stomach, etc. Forget trying to kill the ball and concentrate only on making good contact. Consider that the forward swing many be way more important for you than the overthinking you probably do on the backswing. Try playing a round only taking half swings; punch shots.

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Someone beat me to this. :)

Extraordinary Golf really applies to your situation, Goat.

Also, if you are playing alone, I think that exacerbates the problems.

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sometimes 5W, sometimes 3 hybrid

4,5,6 hybrids (22,25,28 degrees)  Adams
4, 6-GW basic GI irons, weak lofts and +1/2" for more speed and launch
58º Wedge
Odyssey Jailbird Mini
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Golf isn’t suppose to be your life , hopefully you got a family. If not get a woman. That will get your mind right. You will either have a pleasing relationship or she will drive you to drink. That makes bad golf tolerable. Either one works.

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Livin' proof that Lefties are not naturally talented.

Driver Callaway Epic Flash 10.5 set to 9.5
3 Wood Epic Flash set to 16 degrees
3-5 Hybrids Epic Flash 18 20 23 degrees
6 hybrid Big Bertha 26 degree 
7-AW Callaway Mavrik Irons 
50 degree GW Vokey SM7
56 degree SW Vokey SM7
Odyssey White Hot V-Line Fang

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I can empathize with the OP. I have many days where I wonder why in the living *** I play golf. Literally about the only stressors I have in my life are stupid effing college football and golf. Luckily my college football team has started to suck lately and frankly I’m caring less and less about how they play. So golf is the main stressor left (besides some of the buffoons at work, but I digress).

I’m actually getting better lately, but going through swing changes and so it is up and down. Add to it that I am still recovering from spinal fusion surgery earlier this year, and I can only practice so much. I’ve gone through all of the mental game stuff...literally all of it. And I had been playing reasonably well lately but the last two times out were awful, and I was so depressed. My contact was so terrible. But every time I’ve had one of those miserable days it sets me eventually on a path to improvement. Basically, there’s something wrong with all of our swings, and eventually it rears it’s ugly head. It’s actually amazing how well we play despite it sometimes. But the key is finding out what the flaws are and trying to fix them. I had a brainstorm in front of the mirror last night that I can’t wait to try. Unfortunately my spine is too sore to hit balls yet though. I’ll get out soon, try it out...maybe it will work, maybe it won’t. But I’m not the type to just be happy being out in the woods. I need to play decent too.

I get it MountainGoat...I’m with you man. I feel you. I know EXACTLY how you feel. I guess just keep plugging away with the knowledge that better golf will come in the future. And if not, try your best to appreciate the “you” that showed up at the course that day. I have trouble with that too, but am trying to at least accept that apparently my swing sucks just enough to bring these awful rounds into play (despite people telling me all the time how they wish they had a swing like mine). It’s the quest that is important I guess, not the destination (though I can’t wait until I can consistently shoot in the 70s and at least hit a handful of pure iron shots a round).

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Thanks for your comments.

I'm the OP, and I'll close out this tread by saying that I believe the root cause of my problem is an issue about which I've been mis-instructed for 56 years in general an 18 years in specific. I won't detail it here, because I don't want to get into any arguments with anyone. So, it wasn't because I didn't seek PGA Professional instruction. I did. It wasn't because I didn't study. I did. It wasn't because I didn't do the drills. I did. I was simply given the wrong instruction by unknowledgeable "professionals" and pushed to do the wrong drills. In fact, in retrospect, they were exactly the wrong drills. I believe I could make this case in court, if I had to.


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Sorry to hear that you were taught poorly in your opinion. Not to tout his horn (cause there is enough of that on this board haha) but Monte's efficient swing video really helped me and I am just going through his Drive 4 dough as we speak.


I would suggest to go out and play 9 holes by yourself. Don't keep score. Play two or three balls and have fund trying to come up with creative shots to execute. It always helps me when I get down on golf to try and capture the feeling of when I was a junior trying out new things and just having fun on the course. Try to come off the course disappointed that there is not another hole to play instead of the feeling of relief that there is not another hole to play.

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I and my brother had been misinstructed as well. In my case it ruined a fairly decent natural swing that I am still trying to recover. I hit the ball straight with a push as a miss and played with a closed stance and shoulders slightly open and they had me reverse that. It disconnected my swing and set me back years. I feel all they should have done was adjusted my grip or remind me to push off with my right leg to start the swing.


'98 Big Bertha 12 and 16.5 deg. Accuflex Ultraboom X, Acer XV Pro 4i Accuflex Assassin II X, Acer XV Tour 5i-S, FST 115 SX, Bionik 101

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Lol. MountainGoat has a long history of skepticism or downright contempt for other golfers on their journeys improvement and the instructors they’ve worked with. Ego / stubbornness was mentioned earlier in the thread and that’s probably a good guess. Sometimes people have extraordinary success or mastery in one facet of their life (business, hobby, etc.) and that mentality of infallibility can transfer over to other areas of their life where it has no business.


Unless it’s how you earn a paycheck, Golf should be fun. If it’s not find another hobby.There is a litany of highly regarded, well vetted instructors on this forum. It’s you not them. Most will give you 3-5 thoughts or drills to do that will help you play better, but if you arrogantly stick with what you’ve been doing (which clearly isn’t working) you are doomed. Delayed gratification mon frere, put in the work, be humble and patient, reap the rewards

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some Good advice in this thread.

TaylorMade Kingdom M4 9.5* Red 5S stiff Atmos 44.5” vs Callaway Max 10.5* Rogue Max
TaylorMade M4 3HL 16.5* fairway stiff Atmos vs Callaway Max 15*
TaylorMade M4 3 hybrid stiff Atmos
TaylorMade M4 4 hybrid stiff Atmos
PING G410 5-U w/DG 105s 
Cleveland RTX 54* & 58*
Odyssey Stroke Lab Big Seven TU, Seemore si3, si5, Directed Force Reno, PING Ketsch
Precision Pro Nx7 Pro, Shot Scope V3


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