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This was rude? Should I have said something more to this guy?

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So my son (15) and I were playing 9, walking and carrying, behind a foursome around his age, also walking and carrying. These boys, or at least a few of them were obvious newbies and I even saw them pick up a few times, when they saw were waiting on every shot. so they were trying to move the best they could. My son who has been taking lessons since age 12 is slightly frustrated but, I reminded him that "We all were beginners once, etc..."

So on hole #7 they were in the fairway, in range, we were waiting to hit, standing on the tee, which is a large tee box mind you. The group behind us 3 guys in single carts (covid-19 thing) and one man walking roll-up and proceed to walk onto the tee and one yells something to the effect of "hey kids hurry up! get going"

I look at my son and say to him, (one guy hears me, not the yeller) "What are these guys doing walking onto the tee and yelling? It's our tee box." The guy that hears, who was the walker, tells the other guys get back off the tee box (he actually was embarrassed I think).

So a minute, tops, passes my son hits and his ball lands right where one of the kids just vacated. I say "Great shot it's a good thing we waited or you would have clocked that kid"

I go through my routine and hit, my ball lands past my sons and also close (maybe 10 yards away from them) to the group in front of us , (they had walked further by that point). I proclaim "I almost hit in to them" towards the "Yeller"

He says "Good".

I mutter "No it's not good if I hit some kid." as we walk away.

We were still probably close enough for him to hear as we walk away and I say "What an a******."

I might have said more if I didn't have my son with me. I think there was alcohol involved and I am 6'5" 235 so I wasn't too concerned but, I didn't need some idiot with beer muscles starting crap with my son there.

What would you have done?

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Give yourself credit, you handled that very well and set a very good example for your son at the same time.  

Handled it pretty well. Fortunately there was one reasonable person in their group that might have helped the situation from getting escalated.


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I would have let the group play through and then hit into them.

Joking of course. I think you handled it well. The angel version of myself would have later run ahead and talked to the kids, maybe after the round. Tell them to ignore the ass hole and mention the concept of pace of play and letting people play through (in case they don't know).

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I think what you did is fine.

The guy was rude, but it's an overreaction to think he actually believes a desirable outcome for the situation was to seriously injure a kid. He was frustrated and said something that should not be taken literally. He overreacted to the situation and I think it would have been just as big of an overreaction to get into a debate about how literally he meant his words because I don't think there is any world where he really meant what he said. We should all be more charitable in this world of cancel culture and think more about intent, which you did with your son in the first part of the anecdote.

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Yes the group behind us was yelling at the group ahead of us.

I forgot to mention that we got to the tee on the next hole #8 just as they were finishing teeing off, and I assured them it was the guys behind us yelling at them and not us.

One of them said "Yeah we know, thanks sir."

It was interesting to see that the 4 teenagers in front of us had more maturity and class than, the guys behind us who were in their late 30s or early 40s.

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I believe that if he was ahead of us and our positions were switched he would have hit on several holes before they were clear and conditions were safe.

He felt the need to attempt to "bully" them from 250 yards away and he no small way pressured us to hit before we were really prepared just to get away from him.

and finally, we finished the 9 in 1:55 on the nose so, conditions were in no way slow. We started out a hole and a half behind the kids in front of us but I bet they finished in 2:15.

My biggest problem was him jumping on the tee box when we were preparing to hit and yelling at people 250 yards away,





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When I was about your sons age, I was playing with a neighbor that played fullback at Rutgers, and could hit the ball a mile. A guy about your size came up behind us with his group, and told us to hit, several times, while the group in front was still in my neighbor's range. Next thing I knew, my neighbor grabbed this guy by the shirt, and his driver was about an inch from his nose. The loudmouth almost pooped his pants. My neighbor teed off, cut the corner, and put is just short of the green. The group behind us gave us plenty of room after that.

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We all dream of tattooing someone with a 9 iron at some point ......or it's just me. But, you definitely did the right thing. Resolution without escalation

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hearing the entire dialogue even walk up to the tee box, it wouldn’t really matter what you said. It would be like telling a mouse not to play with the snake during feeding time. Probably the same guy who would of elected to hit into the kids and be remorseful after one of the kids gets hit.

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The main point is to totally ignore any pressure to hit a ball when there's someone in range. I never, ever do it and it wouldn't matter what someone tried to say to convince me otherwise. I've only ever struck one person with a golf shot (he came out of the woods while my ball was in the air, no way I could have seen him) and it was the most sickening feeling I've ever had on a golf course. By some miracle the ball just brushed the side of his face and barely left a mark but it was a fraction of an inch from a horror show.

So I don't care if I've been waiting 20 minutes or if they are almost, just about, nearly out of range. I wait.

As for what to say, I personally would have not acknowledge the guy whatsoever. No response, no gestures, don't even look at him. My father always said when confronted by an idiot, ignore him if you can, only deal with him if he forces the issue. In this sort of case, ignoring would have been an option.

My general rule for on-course behavior is behave properly myself, just do my thing and move on. Golf gets too stressful if you start reacting to all the nonsense you encounter from other people who can't behave like adults.

P.S. The weirdest thing about that guy I hit was I left my clubs and literally ran down the fairway to where he was. He saw the look on my face and busted out laughing. I couldn't believe he thought it was funny. I was still shaking a few holes later and just walked in, couldn't deal with it.

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I agree I hit too early. That's part of the reason for the "What would you do?" The guy was pressuring us to hit and I just wanted to get away from the situation.

The reason for the possessiveness of the tee box is that, one ball was already teed up and he walked in front of it to the front edge of the tee, along with another guy to yell at people 250 yards away.

He was literally standing on the tee between the tee and the line of play yelling.

We finished the nine in 1:55 so it wasn't even slow and they had picked up several times already and were trying to go faster.



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Only you were there and we are only getting one side of the story so hard to really judge the situation. In any case if it is possible to back down a club or 3 then that is a good option. If there is a forced carry and you have to hit a club that could potentially reach the players in front don't let someone else pressure you into hitting. Ever.

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I guess the back and forth seems petty on both sides. It doesn’t sound like the group behind OP was saying HE needed to hurry up and hit so I’m not sure why OP is passive aggressively making the point that he was right to wait. My question would be, was the foursome holding people up and did they have open holes ahead of them? If some rando behind me wants to yell at the group ahead of me I would probably stay out of it. And when I was able to communicate to the group ahead I would politely say they should let faster groups play through.

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it seems you mentioned they may have slightly been starting to lag behind, and had to pick up a bunch of shots.

I would have gone up to them and asked if i could play through, and explain why, and that they may want to let the group behind you as well. Pretty standard move. Then the drunk guys behind you can scream at some kids without you between them.

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I’ve been hit in the head by a really poor drive before. Some hack was trying to drive the green on #3, sliced it and hit me on #2 tee box.

it buckled my knees and my eyes were wobbly; it ended my round.

I was too pissed off to realize how lucky I was to be standing.

I’m a pretty salty fella without getting hit, I gave that clown a large piece of my mind and explained when to holler “Fore”.

I play fairly fast, but won’t be rushed by anyone. It’s not worth risking injury to someone.


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