Declining a random pairing?

[CBarns92]

Not sure if this is etiquette or if this post belongs somewhere else but every so often I'll make a tee time in the early afternoon if I see the tee sheet is pretty wide open, hoping to play alone at my own pace and work on my game.

 

Recently I was paired with one guy who was totally normal and a decent player, and then two other guys who were friends with each-other who were an absolute disaster. Too high and too drunk to keep their composure, yelling all over the place, breaking branches off of trees if they were in their way, the list goes on.

 

Is there any way to avoid this in the future? I'm really working on improving my game and while I can still play a decent round with people like that, it makes it hard to truly focus and play my best. 

 

Thanks for any and all input!

[Mudguard]

Pay for a fourball? 

[LeoLeo99]

Learning to play with distractions is a skill useful for golf.  Accept the challenge.  

[I'_rather_be_golfing]

Though I don’t deal with guys that are drunk or high or both. I do deal with guys that are impatient when my wife plays golf with me. I just separate from the others after a few holes. I’ve done this over 10 times this year and never had an issue where the Marshall comes out. But that’s just me trying to avoid any type of confrontation. Next time, try to separate yourself form the others. 

[I'_rather_be_golfing]

8 minutes ago, LeoLeo99 said:

Learning to play with distractions is a skill useful for golf.  Accept the challenge.  

No one should have to play with others that are drunk or high if they don’t want to. Having 2 drunk and high guys chasing balls around the course is reckless and dangerous. 

[2bGood]

Not sure what your long term plans are. But if you don't want to play with random people you have a few options:

 

1. Always put together a foursome and don't go out as a single

2. Join a club (you still will have random people but typically you will learn who to avoid and be able to pull your name off the tee sheet in advance)

3. Dont golf

 

If you have plans to play in events or am competitions in the future you will be playing with random people, so these outing are good practice.

 

 

Edited August 31, 2020 by 2bGood

[Augster]

I say get used to playing with anyone and get tougher mentally. 

[CBarns92]

59 minutes ago, 2bGood said:

Not sure what your long term plans are. But if you don't want to play with random people you have a few options:

 

1. Always put together a foursome and don't go out as a single

2. Join a club (you still will have random people but typically you will learn who to avoid and be able to pull your name off the tee sheet in advance)

3. Dont golf

 

If you have plans to play in events or ammeter competitions in the future you will be playing with random people, so these outing are good practice.

 

 

Yeah I don't mind playing with others but it was immediately clear these guys weren't your average players, they were just embarrassing to be around. 

[jvincent]

If you are paired by the starter there's not much you can do other than let them go ahead of you a couple of holes in.

 

If the course is empty behind you this shouldn't be a big deal. Just tell them you want to play a couple of balls and practice.

[oikos1]

Completely agree with @LeoLeo99and @Augster.  Players that are difficult, whether in your group or in front or behind you, are part of the course for the day.  Best to learn how to deal with them.  However, you would certainly be within your rights to decline to play with them in the future.

[SNIPERBBB]

41 minutes ago, jvincent said:

If you are paired by the starter there's not much you can do other than let them go ahead of you a couple of holes in.

 

If the course is empty behind you this shouldn't be a big deal. Just tell them you want to play a couple of balls and practice.

Go ahead of them.  Don't compound it by now waiting on them

[2bGood]

1 hour ago, CBarns92 said:

Yeah I don't mind playing with others but it was immediately clear these guys weren't your average players, they were just embarrassing to be around. 

 

Yes I get it, some times it is very clear that there will be an issue. 

[Emthree]

You could ask the starter to give you a slot alone, but usually this would mean playing in the late afternoon/early evening when he feels like he's not going to fill up the slots behind you.

 

Alternative is to join a semi-private/private club where they only accept member's guests. The solitude of a summer's evening practice session, where the course is essentially your own is quite worth the fees.

[puresurfr]

If these guys are really slow and holding up the course, you can always offer to skip a hole and play ahead.  It will speed things up for you and there won't be anybody behind you.

[PZero]

"You want us to pair up with random strangers during a pandemic?"

 

That's my go to.

[b2bbirdies]

Go out at super twilight

[95124hacker]

Find a course that offers early morning back 9 play if you don’t mind getting out there at dawn. I’ve had my best practice rounds by doing that. The courses in my area don’t pair you up on the back, you show up on #10 and hit when you’re ready. Usually you can find a gap where no one is waiting.

[llewol007]

Let em know you playing a practice round so either hang back and let them play through. Thats what I would do and have done. Usually I will hang back an practice some chips on the green or I will circle back and play the hole again if possible. There are ways to clear yourself of the group, you just gotta be forward with what you are trying to do. Most people understand and dont mind dropping a player. 

[Soloman1]

That was something I really liked about playing golf in Japan. They never pair you with anyone. You avoid potential problems by never having to go through the awkwardness of it all.

[taporsnap17]

Depends on the scenario and who's telling me.

 

If the pro tells me, then pretty much gotta suck it up and do it no matter what.  If the  course is relatively empty, they know me well enough to just ask what I prefer.  I'll usually just group up or decline if I've just gotten there and want to spend a few more minutes loosening up.  There's only a select few around the club that if given the option, I'd just say no to but in general it's been all good.  I've got a few semi regular guys I play with just from these chance meetings.

 

In OP's example, I'd see how we go.  I'm pretty laid back and as long we keep moving a some etiquette and common sense is maintained we can move.  If it becomes a problem I'll have a word and if it goes beyond that, the pro can come out and deal with it.

[jholz]

The phrases "early afternoon" and "playing alone" don't go together very often in the height of the season. If you want play alone - at lease in my experience - you go late, early, or in the middle of the winter. 

[Twism86]

I used to always try to golf alone and late tee times when you wouldnt get 18 in are key. However this time of the year, when everyone is trying to get those last rounds of summer in are still crowded. If your course books online you and always try and find a bunch of open tee times in a row and pick the middle one. Check right before you arrive if any other have been booked and then try to adjust your time as needed when you get there. Once fall comes around, mid-day and mid-week times can be lonely.

 

As for the two other fools you got paired with, I wouldnt stand for that behavior. A call to the clubhouse would incoming from me after a hole or two if me telling them to calm down didnt work. In golf we all get paired with randoms but we shouldnt have to deal with frat boy attitudes out there. Were they still drinking on course getting drunker? If so and they drove there a call to the local PD might be in order as well. 

[Warrior42111]

I think that it sucked you got that twosome, but as other mentioned learning to tune distractions out can be a benefit.

 

On a flip note, if your're suppose to be paired unless the course is wide open it please do it. Two weeks ago me and a buddy had a afternoon time as a twosome. No starer at the hour but the pro shop said there's a foursome ahead of you and you join with the guy in green and partner for your foursome.  The first group was two twosomes that either didn't talk or didn't want to play together and teed of separately...delay 1. Was walking to introduce myself to the group I'm to be with and the guy from a distance says sorry I want to play just us two and takes off to the tee....delay 2. 

[taporsnap17]

1 hour ago, Warrior42111 said:

I think that it sucked you got that twosome, but as other mentioned learning to tune distractions out can be a benefit.

 

On a flip note, if your're suppose to be paired unless the course is wide open it please do it. Two weeks ago me and a buddy had a afternoon time as a twosome. No starer at the hour but the pro shop said there's a foursome ahead of you and you join with the guy in green and partner for your foursome.  The first group was two twosomes that either didn't talk or didn't want to play together and teed of separately...delay 1. Was walking to introduce myself to the group I'm to be with and the guy from a distance says sorry I want to play just us two and takes off to the tee....delay 2. 

 

If the starter/pro shop says you've got to go together, you go together.  They are the ones that are supposed to be keeping a eye on everything and making sure POP etc is adhered to.  If one group is egregiously slow then if there's space you can move on forward (IMO).  One of my first rounds, me and a buddy were hacking away and after 5 odd holes the other 2 guys just excused themselves and took off ahead.  There was no one around us.

 

If you're steadfast in deciding to split up from the tee, you also (again IMO) don't get to go out ahead unless it's known by all parties that you're willing and able to motor down the course.

[ArtMBgolf]

A lot depends on how full the course is.     If 100% full, you are stuck playing with those guys or quiting.   Splitting up would be weird if then waiting on each other at each tee. 
 
If course is not busy, then it's OK to go ahead, drop back, etc, based on where the openings are.   

[sprcoop]

My buddy and I playing as a twosome on a wide open course get caught by a single on 10.  We wave him up from the fairway and when he catches up says he's only playing 13 and do we mind if he plays along.  We were fine with that.

 

We get to 13 and he mentioned he has a pretty good round going and asks if it's ok if he finishes with us.  Once again, we didn't care.  I joked with him how I liked the way he left himself an out should he find that we were too hard to take so he could bail at 13 without hurting anybody's feelings.  He was a really nice kid.

 

I'll use that next time I'm a single on an open course.

 

He was 3 under on the back from the tips and told us he was 3 under on the front and the way he played I have no reason to doubt him.

[taporsnap17]

19 hours ago, ArtMBgolf said:

A lot depends on how full the course is.     If 100% full, you are stuck playing with those guys or quiting.   Splitting up would be weird if then waiting on each other at each tee. 
 
If course is not busy, then it's OK to go ahead, drop back, etc, based on where the openings are.

 

If the course is full, you just gotta play together.  You're not exactly going to be dropping extra balls and practicing etc so you might as well get in the line and try to finish in a reasonable time.  Sometimes you just don't get a chance to choose who you play with and just have to deal with it.

 

A few years ago I had a run in with another member.  He basically accused me of hitting into them on the green (I actually apologised for it.  I thought the green was out of range because I was under a tree miles out and had hit a low, hooking punch out that must've just rolled on and on).  They never actually told me where my ball was.  What he did was actually hit by ball off the back of the green where we found my ball well after because it's just not possible for me to hit a hybrid 250m and when we crossed a few holes later, I called them out on it and let's just said words were had.  Like most clubs, weekend mornings fill up fast.  A week later this guy comes late and gets shoved in with my usual group.  Way I saw it, all I had to do was walk 3-4 hrs with this guy, I didn't have to talk to him or anything and occasionally, help the guy look for his ball if the need be.  It was frosty of the next few hrs where the most I said to him was a combination of "hit the ball, it's your turn", "hurry up, you're falling behind", "your ball's over there".

[Twism86]

On 9/2/2020 at 3:34 AM, taporsnap17 said:

 

If the course is full, you just gotta play together.  You're not exactly going to be dropping extra balls and practicing etc so you might as well get in the line and try to finish in a reasonable time.  Sometimes you just don't get a chance to choose who you play with and just have to deal with it.

 

A few years ago I had a run in with another member.  He basically accused me of hitting into them on the green (I actually apologised for it.  I thought the green was out of range because I was under a tree miles out and had hit a low, hooking punch out that must've just rolled on and on).  They never actually told me where my ball was.  What he did was actually hit by ball off the back of the green where we found my ball well after because it's just not possible for me to hit a hybrid 250m and when we crossed a few holes later, I called them out on it and let's just said words were had.  Like most clubs, weekend mornings fill up fast.  A week later this guy comes late and gets shoved in with my usual group.  Way I saw it, all I had to do was walk 3-4 hrs with this guy, I didn't have to talk to him or anything and occasionally, help the guy look for his ball if the need be.  It was frosty of the next few hrs where the most I said to him was a combination of "hit the ball, it's your turn", "hurry up, you're falling behind", "your ball's over there".

I never understood people that get angry when a ball rolls up on them from a far distance and likely rolled out much further than expected. You got a lucky bounce/roll, you didnt take aim at the group! balls flying over your head or landing at your feet are different. Anyone will gladly take an extra 10-20 yards of rollout, dont get mad when it happens to someone else and it has zero chance of hurting you. 

[Pepperturbo]

On 8/29/2020 at 2:08 PM, Mudguard said:

Pay for a fourball? 

 

I have tried that and found it's not acceptable at many clubs. 

[Pepperturbo]

When I took up the game I was walking on as a single multiple times per week.  The first thing I had to do was accept being put with other golfers.  Sometimes it was one to four strangers, others times it was two or three golfers.  The goal of the course is to fill each tee time on the sheet each day.  Yep, some people can be lunatics and or wacky directionally challenged golfers, no fun for someone like me that hits the ball straight, but we adapt to difference and get on with playing our game.