Helping partners look for ball

[Rbsiedsc]

Played a round with two strangers yesterday. We got to the last hole, drive was into the sun and I didn't have my sunglasses since i wasn't expecting the sun to come out. I felt like i hit a really good drive, didn't see it. Partners we stating nice drive. I asked where is was (did i stripe it down the middle), and they said left of center. I go to look for my ball and cannot find it anywhere. I tell them this and ask if they saw it and they said no. I continue to look for my ball and cant find it. I look up and they are already walking to the green, so i drop and take a 2 stroke penalty. My question to everyone, was this in bad taste by them to not help me out? We weren't being rushed and we were well ahead of pace (finished 18 in 3hrs 45 mins).

[2bGood]

4 minutes ago, Rbsiedsc said:

Played a round with two strangers yesterday. We got to the last hole, drive was into the sun and I didn't have my sunglasses since i wasn't expecting the sun to come out. I felt like i hit a really good drive, didn't see it. Partners we stating nice drive. I asked where is was (did i stripe it down the middle), and they said left of center. I go to look for my ball and cannot find it anywhere. I tell them this and ask if they saw it and they said no. I continue to look for my ball and cant find it. I look up and they are already walking to the green, so i drop and take a 2 stroke penalty. My question to everyone, was this in bad taste by them to not help me out? We weren't being rushed and we were well ahead of pace (finished 18 in 3hrs 45 mins).

 Yes very likely in bad taste. 

 

I could see a few remote scenarios where it would not be in poor taste, but typically you always assist looking for a ball for up to 3minutes. 

[Mr. Bean]

Sounds like those two were not interested in your ball. First they said they saw where it went, then they said they did not, and finally they did not help you to look for it.

 

I have a word for such characters but writing it here gives me a penalty so I will not write it.

[PappyVanWinkle53]

That's disappointing......very poor taste on their part.  Probably threw cold water onto what was otherwise a nice round.  Let this be an inspiration to always help your future playing partners look for their missing balls.....I'm sure the golf gods will then return the favor.

[Pepperturbo]

We may be playing with 3 others, but each of us is responsible for knowing where our ball ends up, sun glasses or not.  No, they were not responsible for helping you.  If they do help, consider yourself fortunate.  Bad taste?  Nope, expectations, yep.

 

I play with plenty of people (friends and strangers) that can't see worth a sh**, so they are worthless when it comes to my ball.  I rely on my ball striking to tell me where my ball goes.  Thankfully, it's very seldom hard left or right.  Thankfully, I have pilot and hunter eyes and can track a ball in-flight. 

 

That said, its ALWAYS important to be prepared for changing conditions.

 

PS edit: If there's one thing that annoys me, it's not having to assist someone in finding their ball.  It's golfers that don't understand proper etiquette; stand off to the side of a tee box, NOT behind me, so when you obliviously scratch your azzz or pick your nose, your movement doesn't show up in my back-swing. 

Edited October 20, 2020 by Pepperturbo

[BlackDiamondPar5]

Me and my playing partners will often help track the other guys ball off the tee and always will if there's sun in our faces. It's just kind of commonsense. Kind of important for us bogey golfers as we can be a little wild off the tee. 🙂

 

Anyway we generally help locate another guys ball if his ball is generally on the way to our own, or one guy has a cart and can zip around more quickly. 

[dd564]

In my group, I'm usually the first to tee because others are playing the next tee up. I always try to keep an eye on it and specifically provide instructions on what line to their ball is. (Walk toward that tree, or that edge of sand, etc.

 

Frustrating when there is no care to help search for your own lost ball however, but not expected.

If anything it makes me feel like I need to hit better.

 

[ChipNRun]

One of the complicating factors is ball color.

 

I play with orange Calla SuperHots, which I can see very well. But, about half of other golfers say they can't track them very well.

 

Some players prefer the lime green balls, but I can't see them on the turf unless I'm 5 feet away.

 

When I play on gray sky days in fall and spring, I have terrible time tracking a white ball.

 

This has nothing to do with OP's problem, but I wonder if others have trouble tracking balls of a certain color.

[Mr. Bean]

1 hour ago, Pepperturbo said:

We may be playing with 3 others, but each of us is responsible for knowing where our ball ends up, sun glasses or not.  No, they were not responsible for helping you.  If they do help, consider yourself fortunate.  Bad taste?  Nope, expectations, yep.

 

I play with plenty of people (friends and strangers) that can't see worth a sh**, so they are worthless when it comes to my ball.  I rely on my ball striking to tell me where my ball goes.  Thankfully, it's very seldom hard left or right.  Thankfully, I have pilot and hunter eyes and can track a ball in-flight. 

 

That said, its ALWAYS important to be prepared for changing conditions.

 

So.... from your point of view it is just fine to say 'yes, I saw where your ball is' and then say 'I sure don't know where your ball went', is that it?

 

Wow...

[Pepperturbo]

6 minutes ago, Mr. Bean said:

 

So.... from your point of view it is just fine to say 'yes, I saw where your ball is' and then say 'I sure don't know where your ball went', is that it?

 

Wow...

Do you actually take these supposed threads as real life?  I hope not.  YOU just put words in my mouth then answered the question as if I said it.  PLEASE that is failed HS student miscommunications.  I never said that. 

Edited October 19, 2020 by Pepperturbo

[Mr. Bean]

8 minutes ago, Pepperturbo said:

Do you actually take these supposed threads as real life?  I hope not.  YOU just put words in my mouth then answered the question as if I said it.  PLEASE that is failed HS student miscommunications.  I never said that. 

Well, you wrote as if you meant what I wrote. The first chapter IMO made your point: ' No, they were not responsible for helping you.  If they do help, consider yourself fortunate.  Bad taste?  Nope, expectations, yep'

[Pepperturbo]

23 hours ago, Mr. Bean said:

Well, you wrote as if you meant what I wrote. The first chapter IMO made your point: ' No, they were not responsible for helping you.  If they do help, consider yourself fortunate.  Bad taste?  Nope, expectations, yep'

 

No, that was the way you read it using your bias.  Playing partners are NOT responsible to help a person find their ball...period.  If they chose to great. 

 

Even in many of the regional tournaments I've played in people lose their ball in the rough, players stand by and wait.  Expecting people to help is a recipe for whiny disappointment.  Kinda like a person getting a flat-tire and expecting someone to stop and change the tire for him.   It's a choice to help, NOT a requirement.  Just like it's a choice to give yardage to others, NOT required in proper etiquette.

Edited October 20, 2020 by Pepperturbo

[Mr. Bean]

25 minutes ago, Pepperturbo said:

 

No, that was the way you read it using your bias.  Playing partners are NOT responsible to help a person find their ball...period.  If they chose to great. 

 

Even in many of the regional tournaments I've played in people lose their ball in the rough, players stand by and wait.  Eexpecting people to help is a recipe for whiny disappointment.  Kinda like a person getting a flat-tire and expecting someone to stop and change the tire for you.   

Well, what I picked up from your original post was 'If they do help, consider yourself fortunate.  Bad taste?  Nope, expectations, yep.'

 

So if you did not mean what you wrote then we are in agreement. If you did... I suppose we are not. Because IMO not helping a fellow golfer to find their ball IS bad behaviour, or as you put it, bad taste.

 

EDIT: Come to think of it, all these years I have played golf and been refereeing I cannot remember when fellow players / competitors have NOT helped to find the other player's ball. I guess this is one of those culture things between us and them...

Edited October 19, 2020 by Mr. Bean

[SNIPERBBB]

Customary around here to help fellow competitors look. One it prevents possible shenanigans,.two it keeps you moving and speeds the round up. My home course there's so many blind spots the ball can land and the way certain holes lay, you could be easily be 100 yards off where your looking for the ball...on a good shot!

[Naptime]

I'll be another contrary voice.  😀  I don't think another golfer has any obligation to help find another golfer's ball unless they are on the same team.  In general, I think folks should be ready to hit their own shot, and having everyone leave their ball to find someone else's would seem to slow things down.  If the other players are friends/relatives there is some courtesy that can be extended.  If several players lose balls in the same general area then it seems efficient to look for all the lost sheep together.

Edited October 20, 2020 by Naptime

[rogolf]

1 hour ago, SNIPERBBB said:

Customary around here to help fellow competitors look. One it prevents possible shenanigans,.two it keeps you moving and speeds the round up. My home course there's so many blind spots the ball can land and the way certain holes lay, you could be easily be 100 yards off where your looking for the ball...on a good shot!

Same around here - hit your ball first if it's on the way to the search, then go help search.  If your ball isn't on the way, then search first then go hit your ball.  Imo, it's just common courtesy and good etiquette.

[Mr. Bean]

8 hours ago, rogolf said:

Same around here - hit your ball first if it's on the way to the search, then go help search.  If your ball isn't on the way, then search first then go hit your ball.  Imo, it's just common courtesy and good etiquette.

 

Exactly. Contrary to one opinion presented above that does not slow play down but speeds it up.

[dubbelbogey]

I will say that since COVID, single player carts are more common. I still walk whenever possible and I've had a good number or rounds where I'm the only walker with three other singles in their own carts. Typically there, the cart-based guys are the ones doing the vast majority of searching - they can simply get to the search area much more quickly than I can on foot. Just a practical reality.

[naval2006]

Etiquette is the name of the game. You’re not forced to help a partner but if there’s just a tiny bit of class...

[nitram]

I cannot think of a valid reason why you wouldn't help a guy/gal look for their ball. Yeah, it's good manners and etiquette but as mentioned, if done correctly speeds up play. I'll also help a competitor in a tournament or money game search for their ball because we're damned sure not going anywhere until they find it. It also has a way of preventing those "miracle in the rough" lies as well. So, unass the seat and help 'em find the ball.

Edited October 21, 2020 by nitram

[2bGood]

I always find it interesting reading a thread like this. I thought it would be a no brainer with everyone saying you help look, but turns out it is not as simple as that. 

 

I play mostly club golf, but there is no question we all help look, well we also are managing pace (ie we hit first if our ball is close then look, or someone goes and hits well the others like and we switch off). We all walk but, it does not seem like any special effort.

 

The only balls we don't all look for is one that clearly went OB. If you can't hit we don't really care.

Edited October 21, 2020 by 2bGood

[ArtMBgolf]

A big part of the slow play problem is playing partners not watching the 
shots of others, to have as many eyes on the ball as possible.   Knowing 
where the balls of others are, helps the pace of the group.  
 
It was bad taste to lie about seeing your ball and not helping for a few
minutes.         
 
If you don't want to help a mean competitor in a serious tournament, that is 
a different story.  

[Nels55]

I always help to look for lost balls of anyone I am golfing with, friends, enemies, opponents, competitors and whomever.  It would never occur to me not to except for the case of someone who has clearly given up and is spewing golf balls in every direction.  A couple of times in club tournaments I have been a bit embarrassed by low handicappers with really good eyes finding my ball for me in the rough all day.  In those cases I would apologize and make sure to buy those guys a beer after the round.  My vision is not the greatest at the moment and I always make sure that if there anyone with good eyes in the group that they are watching when I hit a tee ball. 

 

Thinking about this I have lost matches by finding my opponents ball in a tough spot and I have also won matches when an opponent found my ball in a spot where I would not have found it.  I have also had young guys with good eyes go out of their way to watch my ball for me on some shots where they could have been worrying about their own shot.  Something that I really appreciated.  On the other hand if someone is only worried about their own game and is not helping with other players lost balls I can understand that and no worries!

[llewol007]

Sounds like they still remained strangers even after 18. I guess they were done and ready to head in. 

[BlackDiamondPar5]

8 hours ago, naval2006 said:

Etiquette is the name of the game. You’re not forced to help a partner but if there’s just a tiny bit of class...

Yes, kind of like holding a door for someone or leaving a gap to let someone pull out of a parking lot in front of you into heavy traffic.

[MtlJeff]

I think helping your playing partners look for balls in a casual round, provided you are not 100yds away on the other side of the hole looking for your own ball, is just a commonly expected etiquette thing. 

 

It's not required to do it. However it's not required to say "thank you" to people or politely laugh at their bad jokes. But we all do it just to try to be part of society here

 

On the other hand in a fun round i wouldn't get bent out of shape if someone consistently didn't do it. But in my mind i might assume things about that person, right or wrong

 

 

[Naptime]

In the casual rounds we play, nobody is taking a true lost ball penalty.  If it clearly landed in the leaves on the fairway or open rough, take a free drop and move on.  If it went in the woods, we aren't realistically playing from there anyway.  We just play it like a lateral hazard and take a stroke.  I have been in too many rounds where the group behind is waiting on the tee while 4 guys rummage around for a ball.  Then they get to wait some more while everyone goes back to their own ball, which may or may not require another search.  Courtesy also means keep up the pace for the sake of those behind you.  If my ball is in the same vicinity as a lost one I will look for a short time as long as we aren't slowing up folks.

[Mr. Bean]

10 hours ago, ArtMBgolf said:

f you don't want to help a mean competitor in a serious tournament, that is a different story.  

 

Indeed it is as it reveals another side of the story.

 

Not helping a 'mean competitor' might slow the group down and result in being put on the clock, and that just might hit the non-helpers as well.

 

I believe from all possible points of view it is in the vast majority of occasions everyone's benefit to help the other players to find their balls.

[I'_rather_be_golfing]

Going through this thread. And wow, what happen to common courtesy? I like to lend a hand regardless of friend or stranger. But that’s just me. It’s not difficult to be courteous. But for some it seems that way. 

[Sean2]

Playing partners may not be responsible for looking for another's golf ball, but that is beside the point...it's the kind thing to do.