anyone else out there that hasn't had a great experience playing in tournaments?

[Hawkeye77]

On the suggestion of people in the travel forum and another source I entered a comp when we were in Troon in ‘19. Got to play a nice course for peanuts. I was apprehensive being an outsider. Got paired with two guys that came there every year from Northern Ireland to play in it with some buddies. Play was in threesomes and I got paired with them. Coincidentally the wife and I had taken a ferry to Belfast the day before. They were super welcoming, we focused on our own games, but plenty of good conversation and encouragement. One of the guys had the same handicap as me - he had a good day (I had an okay back nine, lol). Other guy struggled mightily and shot over 100 and it was obvious he was just having one of those nightmare days and was a bit tired. Yet ... he kept his cool and was a good playing companion the whole round. Otherwise I play in our course tournament when I can and it’s always congenial and people don’t get too uptight.  
 

Have never played in enough competitions to have much of an opinion and I can’t remember any nightmare random pairings otherwise. Guess I’ve been lucky but totally get some folks can potentially spoil the event. 

[cardoustie]

The guys I hate in events:

 

- zero knowledge of rules guy

- guy that thinks he knows the rules and is clueless

- slow play guy

- read putts from 4 sides guy

- negative comments guy “it’s OB left, don’t hook it” ,, this has actually happened to me in a big invitational

- super serious grinder guy that thinks he is Monday qualifying to save his life

 

[Petethreeput]

6 hours ago, 2bGood said:

For me past athletic success did not translated over to golf at all as far as an approach to competing. I was (in my glory days) a national level athlete in two contact sports. I was very good at building adrenaline and channelling it back into the game. The first time I played in a golf tournament this approach was disaster, and it took me a long time to learn how to be in the right mental state to compete well at golf. I still today have trouble figuring out how to channel nervous energy in big tournament, as I can't just go out and hit someone like back in my glory days 😀.

 

 

The competition is very different, but the understanding that everyone is doing their best and sometimes my best on that day just isn’t that good. It doesn’t mean I need to throw clubs or swear, it just means over the years I have succeeded and failed. I try to never let my play alter my mood (not always successful), but I am paying to play not getting paid to play. That’s what I mean about learning to compete. And generally the most desultory competitors I have played with haven’t learned this (in my anecdotal opinion).

[2bGood]

9 minutes ago, cardoustie said:

The guys I hate in events:

 

- zero knowledge of rules guy

- guy that thinks he knows the rules and is clueless

- slow play guy

- read putts from 4 sides guy

- negative comments guy “it’s OB left, don’t hook it” ,, this has actually happened to me in a big invitational

- super serious grinder guy that thinks he is Monday qualifying to save his life

 

 

There is a version of this guy that drives me crazy - does not know the rules and does not think they matter because they are in the X flight or they are shooting badly that day and won't win anyway. 

 

It is a fine line between taking it too seriously and not seriously enough. If you enter a real tournament, expect to play by the rules and don't get bent out of shape because you are called for breaking them.

 

The one I see the most is guys hitting a moving putt that missed by a bit or picking it up without holing out. They don't get that I am saving them a DQ be reminding them there was penalty and they need to hole out. 

 

 

[Loki]

I love the guy that hovers over a 6" expecting it to be given. Then he gets bent out of shape because it wasn't given fast enough. MAKE THE PUTT!

 

Me? I expect to HAVE to make every putt even one hanging on the lip.

 

The other thing I do: you want the birdie on the card? Make the putt. I'll give you a par. Birdies are precious, MAKE the putt.

[GolfTurkey]

I had a guy carry on at me for the rest of the round and afterwards because I didn't give him a 3 foot putt ... in a strokeplay event!

[cardoustie]

In my club events you also have to be wary of sneaking preferred lie guy and creative ball marking guy, often the same guy

 

We know who they are, you just need to be paying attention

[RSinSG]

1 hour ago, cardoustie said:

In my club events you also have to be wary of sneaking preferred lie guy and creative ball marking guy, often the same guy

 

We know who they are, you just need to be paying attention

Sadly this is true. One fellow who has this reputation is as you say known to us for giving (and taking) putts. His group has been told several times to putt everything but they never really changed anything. They’re good players and don’t need to do it, but I guess it’s become a crutch to them.

 

Anyways- a couple of years ago during the championship he was called out for an improper drop. He was outraged that anyone would question his integrity and for weeks he would defend himself to anyone who would listen. I overheard a few of the conversations and chuckled at him as he truly fit the “doth protest too much” category. Most of the guys let him ramble on, but one member told him he had personally seen him cheat multiple times and no reason to doubt the player who called him out. As it was a public conversation it ended any further whining. He and his regular partner both dropped out of the league shortly after that. 

[2bGood]

14 hours ago, Loki said:

I love the guy that hovers over a 6" expecting it to be given. Then he gets bent out of shape because it wasn't given fast enough. MAKE THE PUTT!

 

Me? I expect to HAVE to make every putt even one hanging on the lip.

 

The other thing I do: you want the birdie on the card? Make the putt. I'll give you a par. Birdies are precious, MAKE the putt.

I assuming you talking about match play events?

[2bGood]

12 hours ago, GolfTurkey said:

I had a guy carry on at me for the rest of the round and afterwards because I didn't give him a 3 foot putt ... in a strokeplay event!

There are events and then there are EVENTS I guess.

 

I think the type of event are we talking about are real true golf events were you would be DQ'd if you did not hole out (in stroke play).

 

 

[Obee]

On 3/27/2021 at 9:20 PM, 2bGood said:

If you want a fun relaxed round, don't go in a tournament. 

 

The events I play in I find all types, but pretty much everyone is trying to to play their best and shoot their lowest score.  They mostly all take the rules seriously. Some are fun to play with, some aren't. Many that aren't fun to play with are really fun after the round.

 

Regardless I don't play events for the company but because I want to compete. If I want to play for company I play with my friends. 

 

 

Really good point there about not necessarily fun while competing, but fun after the round. Plenty of people are like that. I had two friends in particular really horrible to be with during anything competitive, golf or poker, especially, but dinner and drinks or hanging out afterwards? Great guys. 

[GoTime]

23 hours ago, 2bGood said:

For me past athletic success did not translated over to golf at all as far as an approach to competing. I was (in my glory days) a national level athlete in two contact sports. I was very good at building adrenaline and channelling it back into the game. The first time I played in a golf tournament this approach was disaster, and it took me a long time to learn how to be in the right mental state to compete well at golf. I still today have trouble figuring out how to channel nervous energy in big tournament, as I can't just go out and hit someone like back in my glory days 😀.

 

 

 

I would like to hear more on your fix or how you have gotten better at this, as I find myself in the same boat. My only competitive round (a qualifier) I was nuking 170 yard pitching wedges from adrenaline. 

[Petethreeput]

53 minutes ago, Obee said:

Really good point there about not necessarily fun while competing, but fun after the round. Plenty of people are like that. I had two friends in particular really horrible to be with during anything competitive, golf or poker, especially, but dinner and drinks or hanging out afterwards? Great guys. 

You are a better man than I.  I live by the old adage, "Sports doesn't develop character, it exposes it."  At my age, I have gotten to the point where if a person is a jerk on the course, field, etc., then I assume they aren't being their true selves elsewhere.

[Obee]

14 minutes ago, Petethreeput said:

You are a better man than I.  I live by the old adage, "Sports doesn't develop character, it exposes it."  At my age, I have gotten to the point where if a person is a jerk on the course, field, etc., then I assume they aren't being their true selves elsewhere.

 

Like all adages, there are always exceptions. 🙂

[RoyalMustang]

On 3/30/2021 at 12:22 PM, Petethreeput said:

You are a better man than I.  I live by the old adage, "Sports doesn't develop character, it exposes it."  At my age, I have gotten to the point where if a person is a jerk on the course, field, etc., then I assume they aren't being their true selves elsewhere.

 

Yep.  Anyone with a reputation for cheating on the course is NOT to be trusted.  My grandpa told me this back as a kid: if someone cheats while playing golf with me, I won't do business with that guy.  

 

If only more people would take it to heart (a businessman-politican who likes to be in the news comes to mind)

[caeye0710]

Considering I'm a 4 HCP and every time I tee it up in a tournament, I somehow turn into a 14 HCP - - pretty much every tournament I play in is a bad experience. 

#hackunderpressure

[Bonneville85308]

On 3/29/2021 at 2:40 PM, cardoustie said:

The guys I hate in events:

 

- zero knowledge of rules guy

- guy that thinks he knows the rules and is clueless

- slow play guy

- read putts from 4 sides guy

- negative comments guy “it’s OB left, don’t hook it” ,, this has actually happened to me in a big invitational

- super serious grinder guy that thinks he is Monday qualifying to save his life

 

 

The "negative comments" guy doesn't affect my play, but I hate the rest, plus the guy who refuses to speak with you or the other people in the group other than to give you his name on the first tee. If you are lucky. I've noticed this is usually younger guys.

Edited April 2, 2021 by Bonneville85308

[Cwebb]

Serious tournaments are not typically going to be social events during play.  After the round, is for social.  That said, some are fun to play with and others are not.  Best approach is to really focus into your own game, while being an "easy" guy to play with

[getitdaily]

I'm much more Jon rahm than matt kuchar in tournament play. Some folks don't like that, some don't care. But I love to compete and am uber competitive. I'm hard on myself, more than I should be, in golf and other things. 

 

I've tried to be the relaxed, have fun kind of guy and it just doesn't work for me. 

 

But there's give and take with it. I try to not be uber serious as the round starts. Focused, yes. Serious over shots, yes. Relaxed in between shots, yes. But, if I'm on then I tend to get even more serious. If you've ever gotten into the zone then you know the feeling...the mind is clear, the focus is easy, zero energy put into focus. I've played years and years of tournament golf and you never know when a solid start will turn into that zone like feeling. So when I get it going, I narrow things mentally. That usually leaves me in a bit of a loaner state to my playing partners. But it is what it is. I make no apologies for it. 

 

Probably doesn't help that I have 7 and 3 yr old boys at home so as soon as the tournament round is over, I'm booking it home. 

[rodinho]

Interesting thread! 

 

Reading it, the thing I notice is how big a difference there is between golf in the US and golf in the UK. The majority of clubs in the UK have a stroke play competition on a Saturday, where the rules are followed - no putts given, no "Mulligan's" etc. - you tee it up on the first, and hole everything out. 

I think it's because of this being the norm, the majority of people don't get overly serious or stroppy. Yes, the good players are into it and concentrate, but everyone realises there is a social aspect to the game also. 

 

Don't get me wrong, there's always going to be someone in the club you don't want to play with, but that's life, there are always people like that! Even though someone might be a d-bag, everyone is cordial and sociable. If you weren't like that, in the club's I play at, you'd be told pretty quickly to sort yourself out. 

[GoTime]

On 3/30/2021 at 12:39 PM, GoTime said:

 

I would like to hear more on your fix or how you have gotten better at this, as I find myself in the same boat. My only competitive round (a qualifier) I was nuking 170 yard pitching wedges from adrenaline. 

 

bump @2bGood

[Unplayablelies]

I play in some men’s groups where we take the game and rules seriously but we have fun and banter too. I played a couple area tournaments last year for the first time and found the experience weird. There was little talk, head down all business for the most part. Nobody was unpleasant , just withdrawn with lock jaw. My group was all within a point or so of a 13 index so it’s not like any of us were going to set the golf world on fire. But then again some folks approach comps differently.

[MtlJeff]

On 3/30/2021 at 12:27 PM, Obee said:

Really good point there about not necessarily fun while competing, but fun after the round. Plenty of people are like that. I had two friends in particular really horrible to be with during anything competitive, golf or poker, especially, but dinner and drinks or hanging out afterwards? Great guys. 

 

I think there's a big difference between playing in events in your own club (like club championships) or playing in outside AM events. 

 

For the most part, i've had mostly good groups in both. But in general you should expect club championship events to be like 50% more relaxed frankly, at least IMO. These are guys you see every weekend. I really HATE being paired with standoffish guys in events in my own club...it really ruins it , i mean these are supposed to be a bit more fun

[Golfer1414]

I really enjoy the tournament atmosphere. Although being in Philly there are some more competitive events that I'm tentative about playing in.  I would feel like I'm slowing that person down... I could imaging that would frustrate him and fluster me...  I played sports all my life and didn't pick up golf until after college.  I'm in love with the game now.  I love the fact that you get to play a bunch of new courses in tournaments.  Usually I will invite my friends so we have a good time.  We'll grab a beer after.  We'll take it seriously but if we're having a terrible day golfing, it's our own fault... 

 

Instead I play in Glover Park Tour which is for guys like me, a +5 to +10 handicap.  It's in Philly and DC.  Pretty cool league with good guys. 

[UncleJohn’sBand]

On 3/30/2021 at 12:39 PM, GoTime said:

 

I would like to hear more on your fix or how you have gotten better at this, as I find myself in the same boat. My only competitive round (a qualifier) I was nuking 170 yard pitching wedges from adrenaline. 

 

The best advice? Play more competitive rounds. 

[getitdaily]

On 3/27/2021 at 11:42 PM, RoyalMustang said:

I jumped into my first tournament today and can't say I enjoyed it. I usually play with a group of decent golfers and good friends: we all want to improve our games but also love to talk golf, life in general, and encourage each other.  At the high single digit/low double digit level, I figured any tournament that is handicapped would be similar: it isn't like an all-comers tournament where everyone competes against everyone and especially some sort of qualifier where legit players hang out.  Handicaps are self-reported and sandbaggers exist.  I just want to golf with fellow decent golfers and play a round, and like I said, we aren't really playing against the top people in a handicapped tournament.  

 

Anyways, maybe it was just my group, but things were WAY too serious out there. One guy was constantly cursing and slamming his club (he shot mid 80's and didn't look to have the game for a lower score) The same guy kept bugging me about the score I was keeping for another player, making sure it had been changed (it had-he miscounted). Another guy was constantly re-checking another person's score, as if they assumed cheating was going on.  The ball drop rule was another dude running over and doing the tee width thing when a quick explanation of "anywhere in this approximately 7 feet is where you can drop". Only one guy was someone I would care to play a round with or have a beer with.  

 

I figured, based on my typical random pairings on weekdays, that most golfers were pretty cool, but perhaps the weekend-warrior amateur player crowd takes themselves way too seriously?  I mean, it was my 1st tournament and I was leading my flight after 9 holes, but even if I had won shooting an 80 or whatever, who gives a whoop?  There were 20 guys in better flights shooting under 80!

 

I raced a bicycle for a decade (was elite-pro most of that time) and it was very social and communal, especially in cyclocross.  Sometimes you puncture out of a race: it happens. Almost nobody melts down.  You typically go back to your team tent, cheer on your friends in other races, and drink beer.  Same for autocross (although the beer drinking happens off-site).  People show up in Auto-X specific cars and want to drive really freaking fast, but afterward we are all friends (and would BS between races if we weren't back to back in heats). 

 

Perhaps I just got a lousy group today.  I may give it a shot again but if that is the general tournament crowd, I would rather just pay 1/3 of the entrance fee and join up with a random 3-some. Yesterday I played golf with a music teacher and a physicist. Super interesting group and I really enjoyed the round.  Plus, the music teacher could play!  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Reread your initial post. You got a lousy group. You weren't playing with guys who were serious, you were playing with guys who were consumed with scores and everyone else. That's really odd. 

 

Keep playing in competitions. You'll get better pairings.

[Imp]

On 3/27/2021 at 11:42 PM, RoyalMustang said:

Same for autocross (although the beer drinking happens off-site).  People show up in Auto-X specific cars and want to drive really freaking fast, but afterward we are all friends (and would BS between races if we weren't back to back in heats). 

I can answer this one....

Local events: Playing golf with buddies.
National Tours: Local Tournaments.
National ProSolo Tours: ProAms
National Championships: US Open. 

You're going to run into some 'too serious' people when you get out into the tours and higher, because there's money (contingency) on the line. Sure, everyone is used to having fun, and some do, but there are still those that want to do well, and expect more of themselves than the self that showed up that day and may end up being kinda pissy for hitting that cone on every run, etc... Especially early in the season. 😉 And yeah, need to get in with some guys that do drink after the rounds, or in the least hang out and socialize. There are some that do, some that don't (go home, wife/kids, stopped drinking, etc...) And there is a LOT more downtime in an autox... I'd be mad if someone wanted to hold a conversation with me while I was actually ON course, or distract me, etc... Or my favorite, having a GREAT run, but someone is out on the course setting up a cone and in the way and have to stop, only to duff the re-run. 😉 

 

 

--kC
(X-National-AutoXer)  😉

Edited May 4, 2021 by Imp

[driveandputtmachine]

I played High School golf, then Div 1 & state and US am's, then mini tours, then got my status back and played some state and US am's.  Most everyone during High School and college were ok.  No one stood out too much as a complete jerk, but there were some.  In college I had one guy pretty much every other round that was some kind of jerk or a guy you don't want to play with.  This was mid to late 90's.   State and US Am events were 30% jerks and 70% fine or good players.  I played in enough events and qualifiers from the time I was 16 until I was 22 to have a pretty good sample size.

 

Fast forward to the mid to late 2000's and I saw a definitive switch.   State Am's and US Am's were full of jerk-offs.  To the point where they were horrible to play in.  First the horrible pace, then spending it with horrible people.  Don't get me wrong there were some good ones, but good = 30% and bad equals 70%.  My sample size here is smaller, but between 28 and 40 I played in about the same number of events and qualifiers, and I saw the number increase quite a bit over the years.  I played in the GA mid-am qualifier last about 3 years ago.  Wrist surgery and a surging handicap stopped that particular avenue, maybe next year as my wrist has been better for almost a year, and my mind is finally catching up to my body on healing from the inury.

 

I have been lucky to play better in events than I do when I am playing a money game at my local club.  I even play better in the monthly MGA events than I do typically in the money games I play in pretty much the rest of the month.  Nothing major changes, other than my bad shots just aren't as bad in an event.  The bad drive in the money game that gives me a double I may sneak a par or at worst make a bogey in an event.  My number of under par holes stays roughly the same, I hit close to the same GIR in both, just everything gets a little tighter as far as misses are concerned.

 

Before I moved I had some guys try and call me on it, but luckily two of the Handicap committee plays in our money games and assured them my handicap was fine, and that I had lost way more money in the money game than I could make back placing in the majority of the club events I played.

 

 

[Slippin_Jimmy]

Late to the party on this thread, but I just competed for the 1st time as an individual and thought I'd share my experience.  I'm 43 and started playing golf around age 27-28.  Just played in a Public Links Qualifier last week.  I play to an 8.7 currently and knew that I obviously had zero shot at winning, but I could qualify if I played a great round.  I ended up shooting a 79 in the qualifier and missed by 3 strokes.  I was very happy with how I played, but still I can look back and know I left some shots out there with some poor decisions/swings and inexperience.  Certainly inspired to keep getting better.

 

The Public Links experience was exhilarating and I can't wait to do it again.  My only other previous competitions have been in 2-man events involving handicaps a couple years back, and they left a bad taste in my mouth.  I was probably naive to how serious people took it, and also naive to the sandbagging aspect.  I don't think there are a lot of big-time sandbaggers (there are some), but I do think there's a lot of "everyone's doing it, so I better too" fluffing of handicaps.  I decided after playing with a guy who shot a Net 57 (with a triple on 18), that I would devote myself to getting better and when I did compete again it would be in gross events.

 

Sounds like the OP got a bad group and should give it another shot.  I played with 2 nice guys last week.  I shared a cart with one of them and asked him directly on the 1st if he wanted to talk at all or if he preferred to focus on his game.  It was definitely well-received by him and he did enjoy chatting during the round which was nice.  As an aside, I parked next to the guy who won the qualifier and he was as nice as anyone, friendly/joking before the round and legitimately interested in my round and asking questions afterward.  All in all a great experience and can't wait to try again.

 

Long story short for the OP: try it again and I'm sure you will get a much better group.

[Dannyboy44]

I will be playing in my first tournament this weekend. Its a 2 day at 2 courses 1 flight individual and best ball with your partner event. I have no expectations other than to have fun and not make myself look like a idiot. My partner is the funniest guy i know and plays in these things a lot. He told me don't worry about winning anything Ill bring the beer lol. I feel like there will be 2 kinds of people at this tournament. Guys that think they can win and take it serious and guys having fun and treating it like a golf scramble. I'm going to approach it and try to fall somewhere in the middle.