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I am so VERY sick an tired of playing crappy golf!


golfnhack
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There used to be a time I could play this game. I would shoot even or under a 3 or 4 times a year, and manage to shoot round about 75.

 

But not this past year. My game has just completely fallen off the planet. I practice 4-5 times a week. All parts of my game. I would find something on the range, but just cannot take it to the course. My swing feels like it has completely deserted me. Not only that.. but I feel like I have lost 10 yards (AT LEAST) this year.

 

For the effort I am putting in, the return just isn't there.

"Some emotions cannot be endured with a golf club in your hand." - Bobby Jones

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We are entitled only to our labor and not the fruits of our labor. Said another way, we aren't guaranteed anything. 

 

If my golf buddies put in the work I have, they would be scratch or better. I'm a 15. 

 

Commitment is a state of being. If I'm truly committed to knocking down my handicap, I commit myself to it and then the actions follow without any effort. I do things that are commesurate with that goal. 

 

Attachment is a toxic obsession with an outcome. It's the opposite of commitment. Attachment is only being concerned with the end result and basing your worth/identity/etc off whatever shows up at the end. It's trying to let something go by squeezing it tighter. 

 

The committed person doesn't care if they shoot 70 or 100 because an end result has zero to do with their commitment, and who they are. 

 

The attached person is so reviled by the 100 that they become someone who operates in avoidance They're "Trying not to suck" or "trying not to hit it OB" Our brains don't understand that well. The attached person ends up manifesting the things they claim to hate. 

 

I spent most of the year in your shoes. I practiced stupid hours and sacrificed time with my wife, hikes with my dog, etc. to hit a stupid ball at a driving range. 

 

I'm still committed to becoming a single digit hcp, but I'm not basing who I am off my golf performance anymore. The golf gods will decide when it's my time again. 

 

If I can ask a question- why do you golf?

Edited by TurnDog69
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21 minutes ago, golfnhack said:

Because... I enjoy it... at least.. when I do play semi-well

Sounds like you don’t enjoy golf. You really only enjoy doing something well.

 

this is totally understandable and the cause of so much anguish (at least it was for me). It’s an easy trap to fall into.

 

Here are your choices 

1. keep going down the same road and try to dig out a game. this might work 
 

2. See a highly regarded instructor and hope you have some fatal flaw preventing you from good golf that can be corrected. This also might work

 

3. Give up golf short term or long term. Your results may vary here. It works for some people and others can’t fathom it

 

4. Change how you talk to yourself and accept that your game is wherever it is. Doesn’t mean it’s there forever. Forgive yourself for torturing yourself over a game. Decide what you really want out of this long term.

 

my goal in golf is to score well and become a single digit handicap. My purpose is to experience incredible places and strengthen relationships with my friends and dad as I continually learn to make golf my lifelong friend
 

Achieving or missing my goal doesn’t get to dictate how I feel.

Edited by TurnDog69
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You have to hit rock bottom before you'll commit to making a real change.

 

It's the off-season for most of us and a good time to get some professional assistance, either in person or on-line.

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My advice to is to take some time off.  You've picked up some bad habits/movements somewhere whether it be your swing or short game and now it's ingrained into your muscle memory.  It's time to shut it down and not do anything golf related for 2 or more weeks.  What this does is a partial to complete muscle memory wipe where you can start fresh and rebuild your swing.  For me, it works more often than not.  In case the short break doesn't end up helping, you can then look into other avenues such as going to see a teaching pro.  

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Fortunately for me, I've never been good, and am still striving to have a duff-free round.  I don't keep score, but I am aware of whether or not I'm parring holes (or better), so the more I par, the better I feel.  Regardless, I often have rounds where I swear I'll just take up knitting, but what keeps me going is the socialization enjoyment I get from it (though we don't often even talk that much) and the exercise.  I walk almost exclusively, so I figure I've gotten something out of each round even if the golf is crappy.  Perhaps it would help you to focus on the benefits of the sport unrelated to the score.

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17 hours ago, TurnDog69 said:

We are entitled only to our labor and not the fruits of our labor. Said another way, we aren't guaranteed anything. 

 

If my golf buddies put in the work I have, they would be scratch or better. I'm a 15. 

 

Commitment is a state of being. If I'm truly committed to knocking down my handicap, I commit myself to it and then the actions follow without any effort. I do things that are commesurate with that goal. 

 

Attachment is a toxic obsession with an outcome. It's the opposite of commitment. Attachment is only being concerned with the end result and basing your worth/identity/etc off whatever shows up at the end. It's trying to let something go by squeezing it tighter. 

 

The committed person doesn't care if they shoot 70 or 100 because an end result has zero to do with their commitment, and who they are. 

 

The attached person is so reviled by the 100 that they become someone who operates in avoidance They're "Trying not to suck" or "trying not to hit it OB" Our brains don't understand that well. The attached person ends up manifesting the things they claim to hate. 

 

I spent most of the year in your shoes. I practiced stupid hours and sacrificed time with my wife, hikes with my dog, etc. to hit a stupid ball at a driving range. 

 

I'm still committed to becoming a single digit hcp, but I'm not basing who I am off my golf performance anymore. The golf gods will decide when it's my time again. 

 

If I can ask a question- why do you golf?

What a great post, really hits home.  This mindset will be a goal for me next year, great stuff!

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19 hours ago, TurnDog69 said:

We are entitled only to our labor and not the fruits of our labor. Said another way, we aren't guaranteed anything. 

 

If my golf buddies put in the work I have, they would be scratch or better. I'm a 15. 

 

Commitment is a state of being. If I'm truly committed to knocking down my handicap, I commit myself to it and then the actions follow without any effort. I do things that are commesurate with that goal. 

 

Attachment is a toxic obsession with an outcome. It's the opposite of commitment. Attachment is only being concerned with the end result and basing your worth/identity/etc off whatever shows up at the end. It's trying to let something go by squeezing it tighter. 

 

The committed person doesn't care if they shoot 70 or 100 because an end result has zero to do with their commitment, and who they are. 

 

The attached person is so reviled by the 100 that they become someone who operates in avoidance They're "Trying not to suck" or "trying not to hit it OB" Our brains don't understand that well. The attached person ends up manifesting the things they claim to hate. 

 

I spent most of the year in your shoes. I practiced stupid hours and sacrificed time with my wife, hikes with my dog, etc. to hit a stupid ball at a driving range. 

 

I'm still committed to becoming a single digit hcp, but I'm not basing who I am off my golf performance anymore. The golf gods will decide when it's my time again. 

 

If I can ask a question- why do you golf?

 

If TurnDog69 starts handing out koolaid I'm totally drinking it!

@golfnhack I've recently found a coach that #1 I trust and #2 offers on course lessons. The next time this happens to me I plan on getting him on the course with me to see what's actually going on real time. Maybe you can find a coach that offers on course lessons?

Edited by KD1
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22 minutes ago, KD1 said:

 

If TurnDog69 starts handing out koolaid I'm totally drinking it!

@golfnhack

Any kool aid i got is from going through this same thing all year

 

My posts from 5 months ago probably would have a similar tone.


The surgeons General warning on my kool aid says “may cause snap hooks” anyway 

 

Edited by TurnDog69
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You can practice all you want, but if you aren't practicing the right things, you will continue to have problems.  If you have a swing flaw it will be exposed when you don't have a bucket of balls beside you.  Sounds like you need to see a competent Pro and figure out what your issue(s) are.  Been down that road.

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When a golfer  makes motor skill changes-he/she  is creating a new neural pathway in the brain 
The problem in learning new motor skills is not JUST to learn the correct new skill , but to AVOID REGRESSING back to your old ingrained incorrect habits. This is because your old incorrect habit is a result of  a well developed neural pathway/path ways, while the new skills are based upon neural pathways that are just being developed . 


How do you do this ? 
First you need to understand the correct new skill. Only a small % of golfers are able to do so on their own without help from someone who both understands and can explain this new skill, so most golfers need help . The strong preference is from an in -person approach over an online session. 

Second , you need to understand that the longer the swing and the faster the swing , the higher the probability that you will regress back to what is is comfortable and WRONG.


What you need to do is to start with “ baby steps”; swings that are both very short and very slow, let’s say 20 yard  pitch shots. You should take videos  for verification  , but the most important concept is to really compress the ball with these swings. Slowly increase the length and speed of your swings , but don’t not progress to longer and faster swings unless you are consistently compressing the ball with the shorter / slower swing. 
Add in some freezer swings , where you take the club back to a specific length backswing , stop for 2 or 3 seconds and then make your downswing . Again the goal is to consistently compress the ball. 

To make only shorter,  slower swings may seem to be boring  , but it is consistent with the idea that longer , faster swings are more likely to contain errors that require compensations . Pretty soon your swing will be a mess of compensations . 


You may also consider isolation or exaggeration drills where you overemphasize a certain aspect of the swing . Let’s say that you are having trouble in extension of the right wrist going back . You might want to use a tactile tool of audible feedback to help you do this .

 

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On 11/17/2021 at 11:10 AM, golfnhack said:

There used to be a time I could play this game. I would shoot even or under a 3 or 4 times a year, and manage to shoot round about 75.

 

But not this past year. My game has just completely fallen off the planet. I practice 4-5 times a week. All parts of my game. I would find something on the range, but just cannot take it to the course. My swing feels like it has completely deserted me. Not only that.. but I feel like I have lost 10 yards (AT LEAST) this year.

 

For the effort I am putting in, the return just isn't there.

That happens more often than anyone cares to admit.  I am 70 yrs old and still out there fighting against muscle degeneration while trying to maintain yardages.  I have been playing this wonderful game for over thirty years.  If I've learned anything, it's when I have bad days, it's usually the result of my thinking or bones not cooperating.  In other words, some aspect of me is in my own way.

 

The other day, I carded a 79, and was murmuring to myself walking off 18.  It didn't take long before two friends and my wife, almost in sync, said, you should be damn happy that you are still out here playing.  Then they say they'd love to have that number over their 90s, and they are 15-20yrs younger than this ole man. 

 

It's as if you expect you should play better, because there was a time when you did play better.  If true, I can see how that thinking can ruin a round.  You're in your own way with expectations.  I pray you find your way out of that dilemma. 


 

 

 

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On 11/17/2021 at 2:10 PM, golfnhack said:

There used to be a time I could play this game. I would shoot even or under a 3 or 4 times a year, and manage to shoot round about 75.

 

But not this past year. My game has just completely fallen off the planet. I practice 4-5 times a week. All parts of my game. I would find something on the range, but just cannot take it to the course. My swing feels like it has completely deserted me. Not only that.. but I feel like I have lost 10 yards (AT LEAST) this year.

 

For the effort I am putting in, the return just isn't there.

pickle ball is all the rage

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  • 2 weeks later...

So I thought I would post an update.

 

My wife recorded a video of my swing. I HATE looking at my swing. But I noticed that I had ZERO hip turn, which was causing me to "lift" and pickup the club on the back swing. I searched youtube and found the video below.

 

It confirmed that not only did I have ZERO hip rotation, but my hips were shifting significantly to the right (i.e. sliding) on the way back.

 

I did the drill, and found that the only way I could get the alignment stick to not move, was to feel like I was pushing off of my right leg on the way back... almost like I am straightening the right leg on the way back.

 

In any case. I put the move into play. Since then, I have shot 75, 75, 74, 74, 73.... in my last 5 rounds. I actually had a realistic chance to break 70 today, but stupid mental mistakes, some lipped putts, and some bad luck cost me on the back 9.

 

To put in in perspective... prior to the streak above, I did not break 80 in the 3 previous rounds, and before that.. was shooting high 70's. So hopefully this helps someone who finds this thread... either the video... or the fact that just stick with it... you will eventually find the thing that "clicks" for you. I have 1 month to shoot even before the year ends. Playing again on Wednesday and Saturday. I am confident I am going to do it.

 

 

 

 

Edited by golfnhack
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"Some emotions cannot be endured with a golf club in your hand." - Bobby Jones

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On 11/17/2021 at 5:27 PM, TurnDog69 said:

Sounds like you don’t enjoy golf. You really only enjoy doing something well.

 

this is totally understandable and the cause of so much anguish (at least it was for me). It’s an easy trap to fall into.

 

Here are your choices 

1. keep going down the same road and try to dig out a game. this might work 
 

2. See a highly regarded instructor and hope you have some fatal flaw preventing you from good golf that can be corrected. This also might work

 

3. Give up golf short term or long term. Your results may vary here. It works for some people and others can’t fathom it

 

4. Change how you talk to yourself and accept that your game is wherever it is. Doesn’t mean it’s there forever. Forgive yourself for torturing yourself over a game. Decide what you really want out of this long term.

 

my goal in golf is to score well and become a single digit handicap. My purpose is to experience incredible places and strengthen relationships with my friends and dad as I continually learn to make golf my lifelong friend
 

Achieving or missing my goal doesn’t get to dictate how I feel.

Interesting.  I’m Not completely on board. But not completely off either. 
 

 

im a highly competitive person , and I happen to love hitting golf balls.  Sometimes I think I love wedge practice more than playing a round.  I don’t generally care to be around people.  Although if I like you , I can be a chatter box and have no issue sharing the day.  But that’s a selected few. I’ll fake it with the best manners on earth during a round. Casual or tournament.  But what I’m there for is controlling a golf ball.  Even though I know that control is an illusion to some degree. I chase those days where it’s mostly reality.  
 

why do I play ?  Escape of work I guess. Life is 99.9% hardship and work.  Somehow golf is a break.  Until it’s not.  Sometimes it’s a second  or third job.  
 

i think this is also why I loathe modern equipment.  Even though I currently use it. It’s like a anesthetic  to the senses . Dull , drab and lacking in feel.  But.  To compete we are condition to think it’s compulsory to join the arms race.  
 

do I have a point ? I don’t know.  Just that it’s an interesting topic.  

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52 minutes ago, mikpga said:

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I agree with this.  I think my disconnect comes from lack of playing time.  If I got to play 3/4 times a week , it would be easy to say “ there’s tomorow. “ or “ next time “.  But when it’s once a week on course.  It really sucks to have a bad day and think “ well I have to wait 7 days to erase this taste form my mouth “.  
 

golf is like driving a car that’s held together by tape.   Once you get one part secured , something else is falling off.    They say youth is wasted on the young.  To a degree I get that.   But I firmly believe that daily golf is wasted on the old.  The young guy would get much more out of staying sharp playing most days. 

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On 11/18/2021 at 3:10 AM, golfnhack said:

There used to be a time I could play this game. I would shoot even or under a 3 or 4 times a year, and manage to shoot round about 75.

 

But not this past year. My game has just completely fallen off the planet. I practice 4-5 times a week. All parts of my game. I would find something on the range, but just cannot take it to the course. My swing feels like it has completely deserted me. Not only that.. but I feel like I have lost 10 yards (AT LEAST) this year.

 

For the effort I am putting in, the return just isn't there.

Were you actually shooting around par following all the rules of golf or is that a nostalgic memory that you've put mayo on? 

 

Someone who has had the ability to shoot around par suddenly does not lose the ability to hit the ball. They are extremely good golfers. To get to that standard in the first place you need to play for a lot of years and ingrain exceptional technique that doesnt disappear overnight.

 

Or you play easy courses, forget the mulligans and shots OB and enter in false scores in the Grint app towards your handicap, like so many do in the name of vanity.

 

Perhaps this is just a harsh realisation that you're just not as good as you think you were or are.

 

Eat a bit of humble pie and accept your current abilities, play to all the rules, submit your scores honestly and play to your handicap. If it goes up - meh. That's the beauty of the sport - we have a system where everyone can compete against each other regardless of ability.  We got older too, and our skills inevitably decrease. This is a certainty. Happy days.

Edited by Wormkiller
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9 hours ago, Wormkiller said:

Were you actually shooting around par following all the rules of golf or is that a nostalgic memory that you've put mayo on? 

 

Someone who has had the ability to shoot around par suddenly does not lose the ability to hit the ball. They are extremely good golfers. To get to that standard in the first place you need to play for a lot of years and ingrain exceptional technique that doesnt disappear overnight.

 

Or you play easy courses, forget the mulligans and shots OB and enter in false scores in the Grint app towards your handicap, like so many do in the name of vanity.

 

Perhaps this is just a harsh realisation that you're just not as good as you think you were or are.

 

Eat a bit of humble pie and accept your current abilities, play to all the rules, submit your scores honestly and play to your handicap. If it goes up - meh. That's the beauty of the sport - we have a system where everyone can compete against each other regardless of ability.  We got older too, and our skills inevitably decrease. This is a certainty. Happy days.

Nope. I am 51, play from what ever the furthest markers are that are under 7,000 and I am a stickler for rules (with 2 exceptions.. see below). Only time I roll the ball is if the fairways call for it, i.e. they are muddy or in bad shape. We do also play 2 off the first tee if needed (and ONLY the first hole). This is just because often we are first off, and don't hit balls before hand. I would rather be first off and play in 3 hours of less, than get to warm up and tee off at 10AM and play a 5+ hour round. It gets really bad in Florida during the winter, thanks to all the retired snow birds that don't have to work and enjoy 5+ hour rounds with not a care in the world.

"Some emotions cannot be endured with a golf club in your hand." - Bobby Jones

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2 hours ago, golfnhack said:

Nope. I am 51, play from what ever the furthest markers are that are under 7,000 and I am a stickler for rules (with 2 exceptions.. see below). Only time I roll the ball is if the fairways call for it, i.e. they are muddy or in bad shape. We do also play 2 off the first tee if needed (and ONLY the first hole). This is just because often we are first off, and don't hit balls before hand. I would rather be first off and play in 3 hours of less, than get to warm up and tee off at 10AM and play a 5+ hour round. It gets really bad in Florida during the winter, thanks to all the retired snow birds that don't have to work and enjoy 5+ hour rounds with not a care in the world.

 

are you actually putting cards in under those rules??! Rolling the ball when its not officially preferred lies, and hitting til you are happy off the first?!

 

 

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43 minutes ago, milesgiles said:

 

are you actually putting cards in under those rules??! Rolling the ball when its not officially preferred lies, and hitting til you are happy off the first?!

Miles.

 

Yes, I do

 

I see you are from the UK. As I am also a member at a golf club in South Africa, I know that UK and SA club golfs are very similar. By default, most clubs in SA have a placing rule... even when the fairways are in excellent condition. It is also mandatory to carry a sand bag, fix your pitch marks, and fill your divots.... as I am sure it is in the UK. Course in the USA DON'T specify placing rules. I have not played a SINGLE public course in the US that does. It is left to the discretion of the player. Have you ever played golf in Florida? Where courses are wet. Where there is NO etiquette for filling divots, fixing pitchmarks, or raking bunkers?

 

I play state events.... were I don't place. But those courses are generally in MUCH better condition, with players that follow course etiquette rules. I also do not play two of the first either.

 

So.. as for entering the scores.

 

1) If I don't like my first tee shot, my decision is to cancel that round, and start a new one.

2) Since placing in the USA is discretionary and not posted (as it is in UK and SA), I do indeed use discretion in determining if placing is warranted and do so on the fairways if it is.

 

PS: Tell me...how is the view from that high horse you are sitting on?

 

 

Edited by golfnhack
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"Some emotions cannot be endured with a golf club in your hand." - Bobby Jones

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1 hour ago, golfnhack said:

Miles.

 

Yes, I do

 

I see you are from the UK. As I am also a member at a golf club in South Africa, I know that UK and SA club golfs are very similar. By default, most clubs in SA have a placing rule... even when the fairways are in excellent condition. It is also mandatory to carry a sand bag, fix your pitch marks, and fill your divots.... as I am sure it is in the UK. Course in the USA DON'T specify placing rules. I have not played a SINGLE public course in the US that does. It is left to the discretion of the player. Have you ever played golf in Florida? Where courses are wet. Where there is NO etiquette for filling divots, fixing pitchmarks, or raking bunkers?

 

I play state events.... were I don't place. But those courses are generally in MUCH better condition, with players that follow course etiquette rules. I also do not play two of the first either.

 

So.. as for entering the scores.

 

1) If I don't like my first tee shot, my decision is to cancel that round, and start a new one.

2) Since placing in the USA is discretionary and not posted (as it is in UK and SA), I do indeed use discretion in determining if placing is warranted and do so on the fairways if it is.

 

PS: Tell me...how is the view from that high horse you are sitting on?

 

 

 

it isnt preferred lies by default anywhere Ive ever played in the uk..

 

you cannot be serious about the first tee..

 

 

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23 minutes ago, milesgiles said:

 

it isnt preferred lies by default anywhere Ive ever played in the uk..

 

you cannot be serious about the first tee..

Yes I am.

 

And you must be very fortunate over there in the UK to not play wet/bad fairways.

 

Again.. how is the view from that high horse on which you sit?

"Some emotions cannot be endured with a golf club in your hand." - Bobby Jones

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