Help me settle a dispute with my dad

[Snell golfer2014]

So back in early May, my dad and i decided that i needed some properly fit irons. So we went to a guy who used to be the main clubfitter for a major golf company. I was fitted in his garage in his house that didn't have a launch moniter, just that plastic pad that you strike and it gives you the lie angle i guess. Anyway, he gave me the correct lie, loft, and length for my clubs, but only recommended a shaft flex for me, not a type of shaft. We went with the KBS tours because they came stock with the irons. Fast forward to now, and I'm stronger and load the club much heavier and I need lower spinning shafts. I went today to get the Project X 6.0 installed in my irons with my mom. He found out and is freaking out because he paid for $800 worth of clubs (which I truly appreciate) that were "properly" fitted for me. Someone help me here!

[southpaw72]

Are you asking how to tell your dad that the project x 6.0 shafts are needed in your irons with your improved swing?

[KYMAR]

Can anyone confirm the idea that 6.0 will spin less than KBS tours?

I don't know how old you are but as a father, I would be a little annoyed at 2 things. 1 that you now dis the fitting you got as somehow inferior when you likely were all smiles on the day and 2. that you went to mom with your new shaft "needs" in an effort to hide it from him. I would frankly be pretty steamed up were I him.

[Snell golfer2014]

I can understand that but all I'm trying to do is tell him that I'm really having trouble when playing approach shots into the wind and he just says "too bad"

[StevenF]

If the kid is paying for them then no big deal.

[wolfpack]

Yeah... you may have played the dad against mom card here... regardless of which shaft you think is best for your swing.

[lukesmurf59]

If you payed for them, well who cares, it wasn't his money. That being said, if you used your parents' money after he already bought irons... well, it may be justified.
I would settle it with a bet like "Dad, if I hit more greens in reg that you today, you let me keep the new shafts and can't yell at me." Lets hope you're a good ballstriker!

[Snell golfer2014]

My dad paid for the irons when we first got them, but i did pay for the new shafts, grips, and installation.

[MadGolfer76]

So, how good a golfer are you? I don't want to sound snide, but if you are a very low or plus cap playing in junior tournaments, this might be an issue. If you are just a recreational or mid/high cap, the answer is that you should tell your dad you are going to stick with what he set you up with, and that you made "a mistake." Also, I think you have to be honest with yourself and be prepared to admit if this is just a case of being influenced by WRX and equipment talk to move to different shafts. The difference between PX and KBS is not so great as what people would lead you to believe in these forums. Even if there was a significant difference, it isn't enough to be relevant for any swing changes made in 3/4's of a year.

[pingfool]

stick with the clubs your dad bought for you...

if/when you get a chance to play golf (with him) he will understand [b][u]IF [/u][/b]you really need different shafts.
make a good decision with his input. paying for a re-shaft (even w/ your own money) still could cause a problem for some.

[blink3665]

It does sound like you are playing mom and dad. I would be sore too if I spent $800 on clubs for my son and he wanted to switch them out 9 months later. Even if you are paying for the switch, it is a bit of a slap in the face for the person that bought the clubs. If you are a terrific golfer than MAYBE a case can be made. If you're a rec golfer or mid handicaper it would come across as insulting. You may also want to think about the damage you could be doing to future things your father will pay for. He may think twice about shelling out cash to help with a new driver, laser rangefinder (or other golf related items with big price tags)

[kitsoasis]

What flex were the KBS tours? They're not that different from the PX unless you went from R to 6.0...

[jwash112]

[quote name='Snell golfer2014' timestamp='1331688143' post='4502845']
My dad paid for the irons when we first got them, but i did pay for the new shafts, grips, and installation.
[/quote]

Sell the pulled shafts on ebay and give your daddy the money

[ChipDriver]

[quote name='Snell golfer2014' timestamp='1331685550' post='4502537']
So back in early May, my dad and i decided that i needed some properly fit irons. So we went to a guy who used to be the main clubfitter for a major golf company. I was fitted in his garage in his house that didn't have a launch moniter, just that plastic pad that you strike and it gives you the lie angle i guess. Anyway, he gave me the correct lie, loft, and length for my clubs, but only recommended a shaft flex for me, not a type of shaft. We went with the KBS tours because they came stock with the irons. Fast forward to now, and I'm stronger and load the club much heavier and I need lower spinning shafts. I went today to get the Project X 6.0 installed in my irons with my mom. He found out and is freaking out because he paid for $800 worth of clubs (which I truly appreciate) that were "properly" fitted for me. Someone help me here!
[/quote]


I'm almost 50 so please take this with a grain of salt. I have a teenage nephew who I treat like my son...he's probably like you - a good son who happens to have a mind of his own every once in a while.

First and foremost - I'm sure things will be fine in a day or so....but probably not quickly.


Just wondering if Dad and Mom are golfers too? If not - I can see their point. They won't understand the necessity of "a better shot into the green" or "more accuracy". Unless you're a golf prodigy - I doubt they care as much about golf as you do. What they see is a spoiled kid who did something that he knew Dad wouldn't agree to, and tricked his mother into doing it.

To be blunt: You've acted spoiled; basically told your dad that you don't respect his opinion, and you used your mom as a fool. I doubt very seriously that your parents ever wanted to raise a son capable of those things....and at least not to them directly. It's a violation of the trust they may have had in you as their son. I'm guessing that level of trust took a small dip tonight. It takes a lifetime to build your integrity - and a moment to lose it. You just lost some. Hopefully their opinion of you matters?

This isn't something "I'm sorry" or "I'll pay you back" is gonna fix overnight. But they are your parents - and they'll love you always. Tonight might be harder than other nights though.

Lay low - and hopefully your dad will cool off. We were all young once and have done things we regret...maybe this is one of those times for you. Don't worry...there will be more.

[wolfpack]

[quote name='ChipDriver' timestamp='1331690579' post='4503175']
[quote name='Snell golfer2014' timestamp='1331685550' post='4502537']
So back in early May, my dad and i decided that i needed some properly fit irons. So we went to a guy who used to be the main clubfitter for a major golf company. I was fitted in his garage in his house that didn't have a launch moniter, just that plastic pad that you strike and it gives you the lie angle i guess. Anyway, he gave me the correct lie, loft, and length for my clubs, but only recommended a shaft flex for me, not a type of shaft. We went with the KBS tours because they came stock with the irons. Fast forward to now, and I'm stronger and load the club much heavier and I need lower spinning shafts. I went today to get the Project X 6.0 installed in my irons with my mom. He found out and is freaking out because he paid for $800 worth of clubs (which I truly appreciate) that were "properly" fitted for me. Someone help me here!
[/quote]


I'm almost 50 so please take this with a grain of salt. I have a teenage nephew who I treat like my son...he's probably like you - a good son who happens to have a mind of his own every once in a while.

First and foremost - I'm sure things will be fine in a day or so....but probably not quickly.


Just wondering if Dad and Mom are golfers too? If not - I can see their point. They won't understand the necessity of "a better shot into the green" or "more accuracy". Unless you're a golf prodigy - I doubt they care as much about golf as you do. What they see is a spoiled kid who did something that he knew Dad wouldn't agree to, and tricked his mother into doing it.

To be blunt: You've acted spoiled; basically told your dad that you don't respect his opinion, and you used your mom as a fool. I doubt very seriously that your parents ever wanted to raise a son capable of those things....and at least not to them directly. It's a violation of the trust they may have had in you as their son. I'm guessing that level of trust took a small dip tonight. It takes a lifetime to build your integrity - and a moment to lose it. You just lost some. Hopefully their opinion of you matters?

This isn't something "I'm sorry" or "I'll pay you back" is gonna fix overnight. But they are your parents - and they'll love you always. Tonight might be harder than other nights though.

Lay low - and hopefully your dad will cool off. We were all young once and have done things we regret...maybe this is one of those times for you. Don't worry...there will be more.

[/quote]

Yep.. couldn't have said it better. This is an even stickier situation if the parents are divorced... (just speculating) since your Dad may see this as his special thing he does with you, and you washed that down the toilet just to have a simple material object. In short... it was a mistake on your part.

[Love2Slice]

If the KBS were stiff then you have no reason to switch to PX. I play KBS X and hit greens with them and feel they do better in wind than 6.0's which I have had. Too late now, but PX and KBS are both higher spin iron shafts IMO, the only big difference into wind would be moving to an X or Dynamic Gold or C Taper or something, if you can load the 6.0 all the way, then you will balloon a full shot into the wind, it works like that with any shaft. But I would just try to explain that you've been working so hard that you needed stronger shafts, which hopefully is true. I went from nothing to 115 SS in a year from practice and 2 good coaches.

[PixlPutterman]

going to have to mimic a few posts on here. In NO WAY could your game warrant the change from KBS to PX, assuming the flexes are remotely close, the average golfer wont see a major difference. Now if you went from R300 to PX7.0, that would be a different story.

If you want them then sell your KBS and give the money to your dad. But please dont try and fool yourself into thinking you NEEDED those shafts.

Not trying to be a jerk, but you asked for the truth

[square]

Agreed.
On this subject, father knows best.

[quote name='PixlPutterman ' timestamp='1331692408' post='4503423']
going to have to mimic a few posts on here. In NO WAY could your game warrant the change from KBS to PX, assuming the flexes are remotely close, the average golfer wont see a major difference. Now if you went from R300 to PX7.0, that would be a different story.

If you want them then sell your KBS and give the money to your dad. But please dont try and fool yourself into thinking you NEEDED those shafts.

Not trying to be a jerk, but you asked for the truth
[/quote]

[Ace2424]

Im on you side of this fence man. I think the only thing you did wrong was to take your mom and not tell you dad. I feel like if you earned the money on your own in most cases you should be able to spend it on your own unless you had previous obligations. Im in college and I completely understand where your coming from. My parents dont know anything about golf an are all the time giving me grief about spending money on it when they dont realize that this is MY hobby, they have theirs an I have mine simple as that......... I completely understand parents and I completely understand that I DONT know everything but in the same respect, just because your a parent doesn't mean you know everything either. Im not trying to offend anyone on here nor do I wish to fight about it but I just wanted to give the "kids" perspective and hopefully it'll help some people understand their kids better. And I'm not say that this applies to everyone or every situation either..........

Oh and one last thing, KBS Tours are ALOT different from Project X especially for high swing speed/spin players like myself. It just goes to show that everyone is different, just because their "almost" the same to you doesn't mean that applies to everybody........

[dlamb83]

Op-I may be only one to side with you,but I do 100%. I understand dad bought you a set. The shafts that came with them,you stuck with. It is not like you used dad to buy 800 in clubs,then in 2 days,talked mom into changing the shafts. I applaud you for using your own money to do the shaft upgrade,install,and grips. Your dad just does not get that,golf being taken seriously,sometimes requires one to change things. Yes,you do grow out,or,are good enough to need something different. Dad is looking at it as "I just paid 800,and everything should be good for the rest of your golfing career."

The people that said before my post,that a KBS tour shaft,and Project x shaft are no different regardless of flex,are,well,off a bit. If you felt a difference,there is a difference. I am willing to bet my whole golf bag, that the ones saying the shafts are the same,and there was no need to change,have no clue what they are talking about. Ask any other person on here,and I bet 100%,that they can tell you there are significant differences in the 2 shafts. You changed shafts,who cares. Hope you play your new shafts well.

Here is proof. Enjoy. O,and on the third link,look at post number 10. Great write up to tell difference in shafts.

http://www.golfwrx.com/forums/topic/467113-project-x-60-vs-kbs-tour-s/

http://www.golfwrx.com/forums/topic/516478-kbs-tour-vs-project-x-vs-kbs-c-taper/

http://www.golfwrx.com/forums/topic/395372-range-test-kbs-tour-stiff-px-60-dgs300/

[Thrillhouse]

Fact is he is your dad and he gets to raise you how he sees fit. Sorry Snell, but you are just going to have to live with this one.

[PixlPutterman]

[quote name='dlamb83' timestamp='1331705544' post='4504595']
Op-I may be only one to side with you,but I do 100%. I understand dad bought you a set. The shafts that came with them,you stuck with. It is not like you used dad to buy 800 in clubs,then in 2 days,talked mom into changing the shafts. I applaud you for using your own money to do the shaft upgrade,install,and grips. Your dad just does not get that,golf being taken seriously,sometimes requires one to change things. Yes,you do grow out,or,are good enough to need something different. Dad is looking at it as "I just paid 800,and everything should be good for the rest of your golfing career."

The people that said before my post,that a KBS tour shaft,and Project x shaft are no different regardless of flex,are,well,off a bit. If you felt a difference,there is a difference.[size="7"] I am willing to bet my whole golf bag, that the ones saying the shafts are the same,and there was no need to change,have no clue what they are talking about[/size]. Ask any other person on here,and I bet 100%,that they can tell you there are significant differences in the 2 shafts. You changed shafts,who cares. Hope you play your new shafts well.

Here is proof. Enjoy. O,and on the third link,look at post number 10. Great write up to tell difference in shafts.

http://www.golfwrx.com/forums/topic/467113-project-x-60-vs-kbs-tour-s/

http://www.golfwrx.com/forums/topic/516478-kbs-tour-vs-project-x-vs-kbs-c-taper/

http://www.golfwrx.com/forums/topic/395372-range-test-kbs-tour-stiff-px-60-dgs300/
[/quote]

Do you need my address on where to ship your "whole bag"

Everyone know there is a difference in every shaft available, but thats not the point to his question.

Its like asking if its ok to get rid of the car you parents got you because it doesnt pick up chicks well.

The point is that he just got them and the KBS fit fine, how in the world in a few months does he NEED new shafts. Its ok to WANT things as long as you dont try and pass them off as NEEDS.

Im sure my game could benefit from some small tweaks here and there, whos couldnt, but he is asking a situational question where he is trying to justify something he did so as to try and get his dad accept his actions.

Im sure his dad may have liked to seem him spend that money on something that he didnt already buy, like maybe some lessons or something.

[TigerStrong]

Learn to play the clubs you have...the shafts won't make a bit of deference in the long run

[PixlPutterman]

How about just next time talk to your dad first. Take him to the range and show him why you think you need them.

[kitsoasis]

this thread still lacks a good amount of information, for starters:
- current SS
- flex on the KBS tour

and whether your dad plays any golf at all

[i]nb: this would be pretty funny if OP went from KBS Tour S to PX 6.0[/i]

[dlamb83]

[quote name='PixlPutterman ' timestamp='1331705990' post='4504605']
[quote name='dlamb83' timestamp='1331705544' post='4504595']
Op-I may be only one to side with you,but I do 100%. I understand dad bought you a set. The shafts that came with them,you stuck with. It is not like you used dad to buy 800 in clubs,then in 2 days,talked mom into changing the shafts. I applaud you for using your own money to do the shaft upgrade,install,and grips. Your dad just does not get that,golf being taken seriously,sometimes requires one to change things. Yes,you do grow out,or,are good enough to need something different. Dad is looking at it as "I just paid 800,and everything should be good for the rest of your golfing career."

The people that said before my post,that a KBS tour shaft,and Project x shaft are no different regardless of flex,are,well,off a bit. If you felt a difference,there is a difference.[size="6"] I am willing to bet my whole golf bag, that the ones saying the shafts are the same,and there was no need to change,have no clue what they are talking about[/size]. Ask any other person on here,and I bet 100%,that they can tell you there are significant differences in the 2 shafts. You changed shafts,who cares. Hope you play your new shafts well.

Here is proof. Enjoy. O,and on the third link,look at post number 10. Great write up to tell difference in shafts.

[url="http://www.golfwrx.com/forums/topic/467113-project-x-60-vs-kbs-tour-s/"]http://www.golfwrx.c...-vs-kbs-tour-s/[/url]

[url="http://www.golfwrx.com/forums/topic/516478-kbs-tour-vs-project-x-vs-kbs-c-taper/"]http://www.golfwrx.c...vs-kbs-c-taper/[/url]

[url="http://www.golfwrx.com/forums/topic/395372-range-test-kbs-tour-stiff-px-60-dgs300/"]http://www.golfwrx.c...f-px-60-dgs300/[/url]
[/quote]

Do you need my address on where to ship your "whole bag"


The point is that he just got them and the KBS fit fine, how in the world in a few months does he NEED new shafts. Its ok to WANT things as long as you dont try and pass them off as NEEDS.

Im sure my game could benefit from some small tweaks here and there, whos couldnt, but he is asking a situational question where he is trying to justify something he did so as to try and get his dad accept his actions.
[/quote]

Sure an address would work,but you didn't answer they are similar shafts. KBs tours,and Project x,are not similar shafts.Read it again. The op said the fitter fit him for everything but A SHAFT. So he stuck with the shaft that came standard.Who says the stock KBs tour he has is fine for him? Kbs tour shafts balloon for some,but are fine for others. He is not justifying spending his own money. His dad is not smart enough to see why there is a difference. Maybe,his dad should have had him fitted into shafts to begin with? Specially spending 800 for a set,and not one time knowing if the stock KBS was a fit for him.

[PixlPutterman]

[quote name='dlamb83' timestamp='1331706466' post='4504623']
[quote name='PixlPutterman ' timestamp='1331705990' post='4504605']
[quote name='dlamb83' timestamp='1331705544' post='4504595']
Op-I may be only one to side with you,but I do 100%. I understand dad bought you a set. The shafts that came with them,you stuck with. It is not like you used dad to buy 800 in clubs,then in 2 days,talked mom into changing the shafts. I applaud you for using your own money to do the shaft upgrade,install,and grips. Your dad just does not get that,golf being taken seriously,sometimes requires one to change things. Yes,you do grow out,or,are good enough to need something different. Dad is looking at it as "I just paid 800,and everything should be good for the rest of your golfing career."

The people that said before my post,that a KBS tour shaft,and Project x shaft are no different regardless of flex,are,well,off a bit. If you felt a difference,there is a difference.[size="6"] I am willing to bet my whole golf bag, that the ones saying the shafts are the same,and there was no need to change,have no clue what they are talking about[/size]. Ask any other person on here,and I bet 100%,that they can tell you there are significant differences in the 2 shafts. You changed shafts,who cares. Hope you play your new shafts well.

Here is proof. Enjoy. O,and on the third link,look at post number 10. Great write up to tell difference in shafts.

[url="http://www.golfwrx.com/forums/topic/467113-project-x-60-vs-kbs-tour-s/"]http://www.golfwrx.c...-vs-kbs-tour-s/[/url]

[url="http://www.golfwrx.com/forums/topic/516478-kbs-tour-vs-project-x-vs-kbs-c-taper/"]http://www.golfwrx.c...vs-kbs-c-taper/[/url]

[url="http://www.golfwrx.com/forums/topic/395372-range-test-kbs-tour-stiff-px-60-dgs300/"]http://www.golfwrx.c...f-px-60-dgs300/[/url]
[/quote]

Do you need my address on where to ship your "whole bag"


The point is that he just got them and the KBS fit fine, how in the world in a few months does he NEED new shafts. Its ok to WANT things as long as you dont try and pass them off as NEEDS.

Im sure my game could benefit from some small tweaks here and there, whos couldnt, but he is asking a situational question where he is trying to justify something he did so as to try and get his dad accept his actions.
[/quote]

Sure an adress would work,but you didn't answer they are/are not similar shafts. Read it again. The op said the fitter fit him for everything but A SHAFT. So he stuck with the shaft that came standard.Who says the stock KBs tour he has is fine for him? Kbs tour shafts balloon for some,but are fine for others. He is not justifing spending his own money. [color="#FF0000"]His dad is not smart enough to see why there is a difference[/color]. Maybe,his dad should have had him fitted into shafts to begin with? Specially spending 800 for a set,and not one time knowing if the stock KBS was a fit for him.
[/quote]

Classy move on supporting him by insulting his dads intelligence

No one is arguing that one shaft fits a person better than the other, he is looking for a way to justify what he did to his father, just not going to happen.

Go read the thread on "Why with all this advancement in golf tech, handicaps are still the same".

Basic fitting of L/L/L and shaft flex are about all anyone NEEDS until they go pro.

Funny one your argument of KBS vs PX, tons of people see to much spin with the PX, my self included.

[PixlPutterman]

Not to mention that PX 6.0 isnt really THAT stiff, meaning he doesnt have that high of a SS (which is not a knock on him), how ever that DOES mean that he doesnt have a "ballooning" problem.

When you dont have that high of a SS, you actually need spin.

Im not going to keep arguing shaft specs with you, since I dont know what I am talking about



His dad has a full right to be mad the same way the OP can do what ever he wants with his money, but he made this thread trying to find a way to get his dad to "see things his way"

[kitsoasis]

dlamb83

Just being realistic about golf equipment here, unless you went from charles barkley to tiger woods in the space if 10 months you won't NEED a reshaft, especially from KBS Tour to PX. Having trouble hitting into the wind? The switch would have minimal difference anyway, play a different shot, knock it down or something. DG, PX and KBS tour are all rival shafts anyway, to put it bluntly - same s*** different smell.

[matthilaman]

i think the OP just drank a little WRX koolaid.

in all seriousness. just go and be upfront with your dad. tell him that it was wrong of you to do this without letting him know about it and trying to "hide" it by having your mom take you. it has nothing to do with whether you paid for it or not, its a matter of respect. my father dropped 900 on a set of irons when i was in 8th grade and i used them for 8 years until i could be able to support myself fully. i dont think switching back to the original KBS's are gonna change anything, just sit down with him and talk to him man to man..guarantee that will make him happier and put you in a better position with him.