can u beat a scratch golfer?

[oregongolf]

You will fold under pressure.

 

 

fold? under pressure of $100 bucks? wer're not playing for 10 grand here. some of my green fees are more than that.

 

i look forward to beating him, stomping, crushing him. If i'm up by 1. i'm gonna try to be up by 5 if i'm up by 5 i'm gonna try to be up by 10. not let up at any time. until its over.

competition gives me a rush and makes me feel alive!

 

i don't count myself out by any means. we'll see what happens.

 

 

You know what, nerves are a factor... i know a couple times where I am under or even on a side, I am always just nervous on the other side. It is like you know you are playing well, and then the nerves kick in and screw everything up.

 

Course management = maybe you need a caddy?

 

caddie is a luxury i never experienced. my golf guru gps and my wits. hopefully will do the job.

 

Dude, I love your attitude. I read the this thread grinning at all your posts. I'd still give the scratch the edge though. You're like 4:1 if you ask me. I'm pulling for you man... play to your strengths and stay out of trouble. Trees and hazards will burn that cash faster than anything else.

 

If it were me though, I'd probably just knockdown wedges all day into the green. I don't think I'd hit a full shot all day.

 

Does this guy carry a handicap or does he just shoot around par? Plug his name into GHIN and post his scores here for us... we'll get a pretty good indication of how good this guy really is.

 

edit: Let's hope the guy isn't a GolfWRX member... ;)

[puppypilgrim]

Spacedust,

 

First, I love your courage to make this bet and take on this challenge. Kudos to you!

 

Second, like many have said, if you normally shoot in the low to mid 80s, I think you're toast. Why? A golfer's handicap is like a cumulative GPA rating. It doesn't just measure how far you can hit an average drive, it measures the game skill set of the total package. I think you put a lot of pressure on yourself to "make shots" knowing you have a shorter club into every green. Your biggest challenge will be a mental one. That is not over-thinking each shot, each hole. If you stay-in-the-present (don't count!) you will likely be able to play your best.

 

Third, I looked at the slope rating of the course. From the gold its in the 130's from the red, about 117. My advice is to play a course that you are VERY familiar with so you have the advantage of local knowledge. You will know where the fairways run out and which parts of the greens to hit to. You will also know how the greens break. In order to avoid a blowout hole in stroke play, make sure the course does not have a lot of OB and water.

 

Fourth, having said all this, the scratch golfer only needs to play his normal game from his normal distances. You however, will be playing a different game from different distances. You will need a banner round to beat him over 18 holes. You would have had a better chance in matchplay, but in stroke play, you must avoid blowout holes.

 

Best of luck. I applaud you for going forward with this. You will learn and grow as a golfer.

[kinneywhat]

i'm just kinda chuckling to myself at this point, cause i really can't see him shooting an even round, even if it is from the reds...

 

a mid 80's guy is a mid 80's guy for a reason... we are inconsitent from hole to hole, and aren't the greatest putters... i know i can go from playing a par 5 perfecty and walking out with a birdie and then go to a short par 4 and walk out with a double cause i drove into trouble, missed the green and possibly 3 putted, cause i hit a crappy pitch...

 

consistency will win this match...

 

Have you been following me around the course and watching? ;)

 

I'm also a mid 80's player and I wouldn't be terribly confident. On the same hand, I probably also would have taken then bet, just because. I have the same problems. I'm a pretty poor putter. I can also get in trouble off the tee with the best of them. I do hit my irons well though.

 

I occasionally play from the reds when my wife plays with me, however, I usually tee off with a mid-iron, so that I'm around the same distance that she is.

 

I usually play the tips at my home course when we play casually or in tournaments. In a golf league I play in, we play up on the white tees (about 400 yards shorter). I don't score any better. It really does all come down to getting off the tee well and putting.

 

Anyway, goodluck. You've got your work cut out for you.

[iscarter69]

I also agree with the posters who said be prepared to have a number of handcuff yardages. I am pretty solid 5 from the tips at our club (about 7,100) and I play with a retired friend of mine who is a consistent 13 from the whites (about 6,000) about once a month. It took me a number of rounds to figure out where to hit to. The course is just completely different. The reds would be even worse. There is trouble that I just never even fathom from the tips. From the whites with a driver I was constantly hitting it through the fairway, having to hit wedges from 60 yards, etc. I finally learned to scale back from the tee and I am now usually around par.

 

You may have a chance if you find your favorite 90-120 yardage and hit to there from the tee and hope for the best. You may have a chance if you stay out of the trouble and if you can putt. A scratch player is going to be in play all day and can probably flat roll his ball. The scratch player will be a challenge from any tees.

[PepsiDuck]

The distance advantage lets you drive to whatever layup yardage you want and should negate any off-the-tee length advantage the scratch golfer has.

 

 

That may be true, but the real advantage the scratch player has over the 10 handicap, like everyone says, is around the greens. If playing from the red tees lets the 10 handicap start from "the same spot" on the fairway, he'd still get his butt handed to him. The only real way for the 10 handicap to even this up is to negate the short game advantage. Perhaps pulling a Tonya Harding might help? ;)

[withdrew]

I already said that I dig your confidence and the whole challenge altogether- however, the more I think about it, coming back down to earth and as Randy Jackson says, "Keepin it real," (and please take no offense) you really don't have a chance if your handicaps are accurate.

 

Let's think about this...we're going through a list of things you need to do to be competitive:

-Keep the ball in play

-Lay up to your best yardages

-Hit GIR

-Don't be a hero

-Course management

 

So why don't you do these things all the time? Don't you go out with a gameplan of shooting your best scores (in this case, par) every time you tee it up? Why is this outing any different?

 

I think if you stick to the gameplan and most importantly EXECUTE (which I think will be the HARDEST PART) you'll stick around, but as a scratch golfer, the closer yardage isn't really a big enough advantage for you to have a real chance.

[animalistic]

Its still golf, you'll see the length really wont matter and you'll still get beaten...not nice but true!! ;)

[tina]

interesting.. this reminds me of a game we do back home. I was about a 1 at the time at the local club and late afternoons we would go out and play skins for $. Well we always played with Tom Sneva guessing a solid 8-10 at the time . Horrible off the tees but incredible around the greens. So anyway The bet was off the tee he had the choice of my tee shot or his and then it was straight up the rest of the hole. Im telling you I had to play my a** off to beat him. So i guess what im saying is it can be done but its going to depend on how good your short game is. His was good so he always gave me a run and beat me several times.

[c010r4d0g01f3r]

Dude Im glad your so confident...you all the negativity on here as motivation...and I am giving you a 1 in 7 shot or so...I think if you can hit the ball close enough on 2 or so par 4s to have a realistic chance for birdie, and if you can manage to par the others...your already 2 under...par the par 3s and birdie 1 par 5...your 3 under...who knows? Good luck though dude!

[DemolitionMan]

Can I put $500 down on the scratch player? With the proceeds going to the DemolitionMan "save a delusional golfwrx member" Charity Fund?

 

It might look close for awhile, but as soon as you make your first bogey, it's over.

 

Reminds me of a bet last summer I made with another member here. Every once in awhile we play a course that is pretty tough, I think it is in the top 5 slope ratings in CA. It's not a long course, but it's target golf, very tricky, and many elevation changes. Because the course is not terribly long, the guy thinks he can break 80 only using irons. I immediately took that bet for $100. His index is around 3, maybe 4, we had played the course many times, so he thought it was in good shape. I think he took my generous offer of a $50 buyout on the 6th hole as there was no way he was getting under 80 after being 5 or 6 over through 6.

 

No matter how fierce of a competitor you may be, I don't think you realize how much pressure you will be putting on yourself grinding on every shot. It effects your game, your swing is going to start doing things you don't expect.

 

Maybe you guys can do an additional bet. $100 more per ball lost.

[sniperjoe]

I hope you win. That would be cool.

 

Stay within yourself and only play your game. Don't even care about what he is doing or saying, etc...

 

You will have to be sooo mentally tuff and so confident in your abilities to pull it off, but it is doable.

 

Don't even think about one comment on this thread. If even for one second a negative thought creeps up; you won't have a prayer. Even if you hit a bad shot, stay very calm, and walk it off before you hit your next shot. Play shot to shot and don't think about anything between shots. Enjoy the walk between shots. Keep you mind in a solid place.

 

Just trying to help out a little here. I can tell just from reading all these comments that you are far less confident in your abilities now than when you first started this. Even if you don't want to admit it.

 

You need to get your mind frame right and you might just have a chance.

 

And........I'm spent.

[stevestrike]

John will clean your clock.

 

[spacedust]

;) i'm gonna beat him. the players that beat me, they mostly beat me because of distance. playing around 6700 yards. some of my second shots on long par 4's is an easy 5 wood (180-210). which im confident in. the players i play against uses irons cause they are longer off the tee. i know i'm always around the green. and most of the time, i can get up and down.

 

my drives 225-275- playing today, confidently straight where i aim.

my wedges are like weapons. (around 65 yards and in, my 60* makes the ball dance) (around 70-85 yards my 56* does the same) (85-100 my 52*) i'm really confident around these yardages. i rarely miss the green at all these yardages. my pitching also. around 115 my pitching wedge, all these distances i attack the pin, as we all should. depending on location on the green. my 9-8 irons are good. its more fat part of the green towards the pin from the 7 iron on out.

 

its a fun challenging bet with a good golfer and nice guy in general, and its for charity. winning or losing, i'm going to learn valuable lessons that will help me become an even better golfer.

 

i look forward to it. i can't wait! i'm anxious to get on the tee and smoke'm!

[rankoutsider]

i play off of 2, and if i knew a guy was really a mid 80s player i would bet him any amount he wanted with him at the forward tees and me way the hell off the map. you are both going to be on or around the green in regulation anyway. and he is probably looking good on the 3s and 5s despite where you tee off from.

 

the thing that higher handicap players don't always realize is how tough it is to win a hole against a good player. if you knock your wedge to 10 feet and he misses the green but is pin high, even if he is in a bunker or long rough, you will probably saw off the hole. he is a scratch player because he gets up and down almost all of the time that he misses.

 

now reverse that scenario. if he knocks it to 10 feet, or even 30 feet, and you miss 10 yds right or left, who is going to win the hole? he'll two-putt that, or make it, nearly everytime, and you will have to work your a*& off to make 3 from there.

 

in the rematch, take 6 strokes aside and play him from the whites or the blues. that is really your best chance. you can still make a number of pars, and with the stroke he will have to grind his butt off to stay with you.

 

rank

[birdie_man]

Atta boy Mr. Spacedust.

 

Good luck.

 

Turn him into Spacedust.

 

Play to your strengths.

[HEMIPHIL]

John will clean your clock.

 

I was going to post the same thing...too funny. Dude...I wish you all the best. Seriously...have you ever been paired with a scratch, or better golfer before. My doubles match play partner a couple years back played off a +3. Some of the best ball stricking I've ever seen. If the guy you're playing has any amount of serious length...forget it. My partner drove it into the greenside bunker on a short par 4 (370 yards). Nearly holed the bunker shot for eagle...tap in birdie. He shot (-7) 64...it seemed even lower...unreal!! FWIW...that day, during our match I was 79 (net 67...off his HDCP). The match, mercifully for our opponents was over on #13. Stroke play...that's going to be way harder to knock off a scratch player. Better players seem to have a way of looking like they're not doing anything fantastic, until you add it all up. Then you realize...that guy is really good. Like David Feherty said in TW 2005 for PS2..." You're going to need a hug from your Mommy".

[chrisfx811]

;) i'm gonna beat him. the players that beat me, they mostly beat me because of distance. playing around 6700 yards. some of my second shots on long par 4's is an easy 5 wood (180-210). which im confident in. the players i play against uses irons cause they are longer off the tee. i know i'm always around the green. and most of the time, i can get up and down.

 

my drives 225-275- playing today, confidently straight where i aim.

my wedges are like weapons. (around 65 yards and in, my 60* makes the ball dance) (around 70-85 yards my 56* does the same) (85-100 my 52*) i'm really confident around these yardages. i rarely miss the green at all these yardages. my pitching also. around 115 my pitching wedge, all these distances i attack the pin, as we all should. depending on location on the green. my 9-8 irons are good. its more fat part of the green towards the pin from the 7 iron on out.

 

With all of the above assumed to be true, you wouldn't be shooting mid 80's unless you were a terrible putter.

You rarely miss the green from, <100 yds?

You attack the pin with pw & less?

Your 8 & 9 are good?

Your hitting the fat of the green with 7i or more?

Your confident in your 5w from 180-210?

225-275 confidently straight?

 

Where do you drop 12+ strokes a round with that kind of game?

[tec333]

This is interesting, with all the info you provided - I think you are definitely the underdog.

 

I think you would have better chances getting 9 strokes and playing him from the blues. Unless you have troubles from the tee box.

 

I play a good friend who is a scratch golfer and head golf pro at my local course. I play to about a 12. Last time I played him - he gave me a stroke a hole except for the par 3's. It was close but I still lost by a stroke after 18. I think he would definitely spank me heads up if I played red tees and he played blue tees.

 

You are pretty much saying you will shoot par from the red tees.

 

Good Luck! I hope you take him down...

[oregongolf]

I still wanna see if this guy's an actual scratch player.

 

Punch his name into the GHIN lookup and see what you can find.

[bloodredsun]

I think that this is a great way for a mid-capper to test their game.

 

SpaceDust, I love the fact that you back yourself enough to take the bet but I have to agree that you're about 4:1 on losing. Still, there's always the chance the you can take him. He has a bad day and you have a good one and suddenly it's all different! You are really going to have to grind out the holes and force him to play shots that are a little more risky, otherwise you're deadmeat!

 

Good luck, play your best and please tell us how it goes.

[TEConnor]

I was thinking of the Ping commercials the whole time I read this thread...thanks for the smiles! I've been imagining spacenuts stroking putts and making that little "poof" noise like the guy in the add. Classic.

 

I hope you give us a full recap of the match spacenuts!

 

I'd also be really curious about how this bet was proposed. Was it the case that you said something to the effect of, "gee Wally, if I could hit the ball as far as you I'd shoot under par every time!" Then Wally responded, "gee Nuts, that's interesting I hear that from mid-80s shooters all the time, but I think that's a delusional statement...care to back it up?"

 

Cheers,

Tim

[cdesana]

;) i'm gonna beat him. the players that beat me, they mostly beat me because of distance. playing around 6700 yards. some of my second shots on long par 4's is an easy 5 wood (180-210). which im confident in. the players i play against uses irons cause they are longer off the tee. i know i'm always around the green. and most of the time, i can get up and down.

 

my drives 225-275- playing today, confidently straight where i aim.

my wedges are like weapons. (around 65 yards and in, my 60* makes the ball dance) (around 70-85 yards my 56* does the same) (85-100 my 52*) i'm really confident around these yardages. i rarely miss the green at all these yardages. my pitching also. around 115 my pitching wedge, all these distances i attack the pin, as we all should. depending on location on the green. my 9-8 irons are good. its more fat part of the green towards the pin from the 7 iron on out.

 

With all of the above assumed to be true, you wouldn't be shooting mid 80's unless you were a terrible putter.

You rarely miss the green from, <100 yds?

You attack the pin with pw & less?

Your 8 & 9 are good?

Your hitting the fat of the green with 7i or more?

Your confident in your 5w from 180-210?

225-275 confidently straight?

 

Where do you drop 12+ strokes a round with that kind of game?

 

I was thinking that game resembled mine, and I am a 2 handicap. A crappy 2, nut a 2 none the less!

[Geo]

;) i'm gonna beat him. the players that beat me, they mostly beat me because of distance. playing around 6700 yards. some of my second shots on long par 4's is an easy 5 wood (180-210). which im confident in. the players i play against uses irons cause they are longer off the tee. i know i'm always around the green. and most of the time, i can get up and down.

 

my drives 225-275- playing today, confidently straight where i aim.

my wedges are like weapons. (around 65 yards and in, my 60* makes the ball dance) (around 70-85 yards my 56* does the same) (85-100 my 52*) i'm really confident around these yardages. i rarely miss the green at all these yardages. my pitching also. around 115 my pitching wedge, all these distances i attack the pin, as we all should. depending on location on the green. my 9-8 irons are good. its more fat part of the green towards the pin from the 7 iron on out.

 

With all of the above assumed to be true, you wouldn't be shooting mid 80's unless you were a terrible putter.

You rarely miss the green from, <100 yds?

You attack the pin with pw & less?

Your 8 & 9 are good?

Your hitting the fat of the green with 7i or more?

Your confident in your 5w from 180-210?

225-275 confidently straight?

 

Where do you drop 12+ strokes a round with that kind of game?

 

I was thinking that game resembled mine, and I am a 2 handicap. A crappy 2, nut a 2 none the less!

 

Word. I'm a vanity 15, and I attack the pins with the 9 through LW.

 

So far, the pins have yet to be scared. ;)

[spacedust]

i've been told by many good players, i have all the tools. my long irons can be a little inconsistent at times and chipping could be a little better 10-40 yards is a little awkward. this is where i'm dropping those shots. That and being the "hero" when there risk/benefit doesn't warrant it. over all my game is ok, if i improve on these, i would be a solid single digit.

 

being longer off the tee would do a lot for my game also.

 

so thats where the 10-12 shots coming from.

 

if i lay up to 60-115 yard range instead of 10-40. i would do better. and wouldn't have to use such a long iron for my second shot to be around the green. i'll give it a try next time.

 

been using the bushnell yardage pro for years. its good. but doesn't have the pinseeker option. have to keep really still. but it tell you things you can see or how far to a blind creek.

 

before i would know there is water but not how far. so i would lay up. and at times it comes up way short. now i have a long iron coming in. i just ordered the gps golfguru. i hope this will help me make better decisions. hit a full swing and confidently know i'll be close but not in the hazard. and with a short iron coming in. this will shave a couple of strokes off my game.

 

my friend has the skycaddie sg5. very nice. and can confidently hit to yardages, no standing there aiming like the range finder.

[mistral]

We did this exercise with one of our teams a couple of years back. Their handicaps ranged from 4 - 7. Not one of them came close to breaking par off the front tees.

 

Just because a hole is 85 yards long, don't think you will birdie it. If you attack the flag, that 2 can easily turn into a 4 or 5 if you short side yourself. 10 handicaps are what they are due to inconsistency, short game and course management.

 

Good luck though. Scratch players can still shoot 80 on any given day.

[rankoutsider]

i've been told by many good players, i have all the tools. my long irons can be a little inconsistent at times and chipping could be a little better 10-40 yards is a little awkward. this is where i'm dropping those shots. That and being the "hero" when there risk/benefit doesn't warrant it. over all my game is ok, if i improve on these, i would be a solid single digit.

 

being longer off the tee would do a lot for my game also.

 

so thats where the 10-12 shots coming from.

 

if i lay up to 60-115 yard range instead of 10-40. i would do better. and wouldn't have to use such a long iron for my second shot to be around the green. i'll give it a try next time.

 

but then where is your advantage? your best shot right now is to fake that you are sick and not play. i'm only kidding.

 

but you need to insist on the rematch: both from the whites, 6 strokes each way. he would never take that bet if he was smart.

[TEConnor]

i've been told by many good players, i have all the tools. my long irons can be a little inconsistent at times and chipping could be a little better 10-40 yards is a little awkward. this is where i'm dropping those shots. That and being the "hero" when there risk/benefit doesn't warrant it. over all my game is ok, if i improve on these, i would be a solid single digit.

 

being longer off the tee would do a lot for my game also.

 

so thats where the 10-12 shots coming from.

 

if i lay up to 60-115 yard range instead of 10-40. i would do better. and wouldn't have to use such a long iron for my second shot to be around the green. i'll give it a try next time.

 

been using the bushnell yardage pro for years. its good. but doesn't have the pinseeker option. have to keep really still. but it tell you things you can see or how far to a blind creek.

 

before i would know there is water but not how far. so i would lay up. and at times it comes up way short. now i have a long iron coming in. i just ordered the gps golfguru. i hope this will help me make better decisions. hit a full swing and confidently know i'll be close but not in the hazard. and with a short iron coming in. this will shave a couple of strokes off my game.

 

my friend has the skycaddie sg5. very nice. and can confidently hit to yardages, no standing there aiming like the range finder.

 

I've played for 20+ years and I've never seen a player that has only two weaknesses (pitching and long-irons) that makes them a 10. Out of the hundreds of approx. 10 handicap players I've played with over the years they generally do ALL of the following things poorly compared to scratch players:

 

1) Putt from 6 - 10 feet.

2) Lag putt from outside 25 feet.

3) Approach from 60-150 yards.

4) Hit greens on par 3s of any length.

5) Chipping from poor/difficult lies.

6) Honest about their iron distances/tendencies.

7) Handle pressure.

8) Hit Fairways.

 

The one thing not on the list is driving distance. I've met many, many 10 handicaps who generally hit the ball as far as necessary to become scratch. I've known many scratch players who can barely get it out of their shadows. The bottom line is the number of strokes to get it in the hole. If you generally take 10-12 more than your competitor, the tee position is the least relevant factor to making up those strokes.

 

I'd be willing to take side bets (for charity of course) that Spacedust shoots higher than rating + index in this match. Any takers? Spacedust?

 

Good luck, nonetheless.

 

Cheers,

Tim

[spacedust]

i've played a lot but never had an official usga handicap. what i think of a handicap is probably wrong. i think its what you're average score is.

 

thats what i think a handicap is. but other's have said otherwise, its you're potential, etc. etc.

 

i've played a lot of people that were 12-15 handicaps, i think they suck.

 

i don't have time or want to play 10 rounds with them, waiting for them to hit a good round. if you tell me you're a 12, i expect you to hit low to mid 80's all the time, everytime.

 

am i wrong?

 

and if you're a scratch. 0 handicap. i expect you to par the course, maybe 1 or 2 over at most- everytime. doesn't matter if its a 6800 or 7500 yard course.

 

i don't mean any disrespect to anyone, but maybe my thoughts on the handicap thing is out of whack with the norm. but to me. its seems like common sense.

[jjj912]

The handicap is a bit more complicated than the simple average of your scores. And there are two handicaps, your handicap index and your course handicap. Check out the USGA website for more details.

 

I think the math works out where a golfer shoots his handicap or better only about 25% of the time. Based on the scorecard that was posted, I figure your scratch golfer is going to shoot around a 75. Obviously, he could have a good day and shoot a 70. He could also have a not so good day and shoot an 80.

[mat562]

I'm in agreement with many of the above posts.

 

I think you will struggle to make up a dozen shots purely by shortening the course - even by a huge amount. A genuine scratch player, playing reasonably well, would be expecting to hit around a dozen GIRs, and, assuming he doesn't putt like a blind man, he'll be making par or better on those holes. A typical scratch player also has a solid short game - which will save pars more often than not when he does miss a green, and which may yield birdies on the par 5s.

 

If you're a mid handicapper, you're dropping a dozen or more strokes a round. Yes, it will be easier to hit on or around the greens from a shorter approach (or tee shot on the par 3s) but a dozen strokes is an enormous amount to make up in a round of golf, even if you are hitting 3 or 4 clubs less.

 

When you play a better player under the handicap system, you get a guaranteed advantage of however-many strokes. A distance advantage is ambiguous, and it makes it easier, but it doesn't automatically knock strokes off your score. It gives you an opportunity to score a bit better if you hit the ball well, but it doesn't have you a stroke up standing on the tee.

 

Unless you're able to hole a lot of putts, or transform your greenside chipping and pitching to 'automatic up and down mode' I think you'll struggle, since that's where the game is likely to be won and lost.

 

I'm a scratch player (well, 0.6 currently) and I regularly play with mid handicap friends from the yellow (i.e. not back) tees to make things easier when we play. I reckon I gain a shot or two at most by playing the course at 400 yards shorter. I'm hitting a 6 iron into a green instead of a 5, or I'm playing a par 3 with a 4 iron rather than a 5. No big deal. And some of the tee shots are a 1 iron or 3 wood instead of a driver since the fairway bunkering is more relevant from a forward tee or a dogleg's more awkward. Again, no big deal. Admittedly, a 30 yard yardage cut may make a bigger difference to a mid-handicapper than it does to a scratch player, but I don't see it being worth nigh-on a shot a hole. Certainly, I don't go from shooting around par to firing a 66 every time we play.

 

As I say, the big difference between a solid scratch and a 12 or 14 handicapper is in the overall consistency of ballstriking and in the short game in my experience; and I don't think a few (or even a lot) of yards will negate that advantage.

 

Good luck regardless, but my advice would be to practice your short game and putting and try to avoid any really damaging 'silly' shots that cost a bundle of strokes. The first time you cane one 40 yards off-line and lose a ball is the beginning of the end in my opinion. Put yourself in play from the tee and leave yourself a lot of comfortable approaches and you may hae a smidgeon of a chance if your opponent has a mediocre day.

 

My tactic, if I was your opponent, would be to play my own game and, assuming it's a familiar track, shoot a solid round around par. I'll play for GIRs and two-putts and take a birdie when it comes. I'll also avoid any big numbers as best I can and use my short game where I have to. I'll let you get yourself into the uncharted territory of being level par coming down the last, short tees or not, and leave it with you...

 

AS I say, I think you'l struggle, but good luck.