Temper Tantrums on the golf course

[matt_thatsme]

says the guy insulting a person he doesn't even know... but continue, please.

While you are at it, please explain to me how I lacked courtesy. I apologized the first time. The second time I asked him if he would let it go because my friend was clearly not acting rational and I didn't want it to escalate into a fight and he reluctantly agreed and walked off. I am assuming that you took my statement that I told him that my friend was going to hit him with a club literally and you ignored the part where I said that I politely told him. If that is the case then that is your mistake for assuming and mine for not clearly explaining.....either way, I don't need your approval. I still stand by my point(s) that 1) one angry man confronting another angry man on a golf course in an agressive manner is not a good idea; 2) a call to the clubhouse is a better option; and 3) jean shorts are not ok on the golf course or anywhere else.

[doof_dizzler]

[quote name='Jimmy Mac' date='02 June 2010 - 09:51 AM' timestamp='1275493868' post='2482072']
[quote name='matt_thatsme' date='31 May 2010 - 03:08 PM' timestamp='1275332883' post='2478173']
I was playing with a few friends today at a local muni. Well, one of the guys was having a difficult day to say the least. He is normally not the kind of guy who lets the game get to him, but today was different. After several bad shots and bad breaks the guy finally blows a gasket and tomahawks a club twenty yards. The problem is that he holds on to it just a little too long and it flies toward another group of golfers. It lands about 15 yards short of the other group, but it was just close enough to make my friend feel like an a** for throwing a club. I do not promote club throwing at all and I have never thrown a club myself (too afraid of losing or breaking a club...and well looking like an a**). However, a guy from the other group took it upon himself to walk over to my friend and lecture him. I fully intended on saying something once he regained his cool, but this guy decided it was his place to step in. There is a time and place for lecturing a club throwing idiot......that time is not right after he throws a club and has fire burning in his eyes. I quickly drove over in between the two and told my friend to get in the cart and he did. I apologized to the guy and drove off. It just wasn't enough for him though because three holes later he starts running his mouth again. I walked down to the guy who by the way is around 5 ft. 8in 150lbs. Not to mention he is wearing jean shorts and has more golf clubs in his bag than he has teeth. I calmly and politely informed him that my friend was clearly in the wrong for tossing his club, but if he continued to run his mouth there was a good chance that my 6 ft. 4in 225lb friend was going to wrap that same club around his head. I think he got the point because he just walked away and didn't say a thing.

Oh, and I definitely voiced my displeasure to my friend about his club throwing after the round. I guess the point(s) I am trying to make is that 1. unless you are riding in a cart that says ranger on it you should either mind your own business or call the clubhouse and have a ranger come out and take care of the situations. 2. there is a time and place to talk to a person who has just thrown a temper trantrum and tossed his club...that time is certainly not right after he does it.
[/quote]



Classic post. So now the guy who the club was thrown toward is the bad guy in this version of the story? Classic. I also love the part about the 5'8" 150lb guy needing to step aside because your buddy is 6'4" 225lb. Heck this is great news, I'm 6'4" 330, according to this logic I can pretty much do whatever I want. (Excepting of course sit ups, pull ups, wind sprints, dating supermodels and living past 60 - just thought I'd save you the trouble of pointing that out to me)


[/quote]

LOL. Nice to see a big guy pointing out that it's actually not OK for a big guy to expect to act like a jerk and get away with it. I too reject the idea that a larger man is entitled to act like a jerk and shouldn't apologize in this specific situation.


[quote name='scottcuban' date='02 June 2010 - 09:56 AM' timestamp='1275494164' post='2482085']
I recall reading a story about a guy who was so angry after a bad shot that he swung his club (driver) onto his golf cart. The shaft snapped in half and the grip end (that he was holding) bounced sharply back up and punctured his neck. They said it hit his carotid artery and he bled out and died right there.
It may be urban legend, but I definitely read it a few years ago. Crazy tempers are not good
[/quote]

Swift Current, Saskatchewan, circa 2004. My first ex-wife's cousin Shaun had the driver shaft in the neck. Very lucky he didn't die, only dumb luck prevented it from puncturing an artery. Not certain, but I believe it was whacked on the ground.

[doof_dizzler]

Throwing clubs is not acceptable for ANY reason IMO. If one absolutely must demonstrate their displeasure, snapping a shaft over the knee is OK tho. Best to snap the driver to show that one is REALLY mad, no sense in being a pu$$y and breaking a cheap steel shaft.

[Jimmy Mac]

says the guy insulting a person he doesn't even know... but continue, please.

 

While you are at it, please explain to me how I lacked courtesy. I apologized the first time. The second time I asked him if he would let it go because my friend was clearly not acting rational and I didn't want it to escalate into a fight and he reluctantly agreed and walked off. I am assuming that you took my statement that I told him that my friend was going to hit him with a club literally and you ignored the part where I said that I politely told him. If that is the case then that is your mistake for assuming and mine for not clearly explaining.....either way, I don't need your approval. I still stand by my point(s) that 1) one angry man confronting another angry man on a golf course in an agressive manner is not a good idea; 2) a call to the clubhouse is a better option; and 3) jean shorts are not ok on the golf course or anywhere else.

 

 

 

 

Matt you have very good points. It doesn't seem that YOU lacked courtesy. I certainly don't doubt that you tried to defuse the situation. However, when you make derogatory comments about the golfer from the other group and say you warned your buddy might "wrap a club around his head", it casts a pretty big shadow over your claim of "calmly and politely" especially the "politely" part. I'll take your word for it, though.

 

As to your points: 1) I think that's just a given; 2) True, but a quick, sincere apology from your friend would have defused the situation just as well - probably better; 3) somewhat agree, but I'd have to qualify that by saying "men wearing jean shorts...."

 

One of the main flaws is that you're saying "Why does that guy need an apology?" Why? Because your buddy threw a club at him, sure it didn't hit him, nor was it intended to hit him, doesn't change the fact that he threw the club and he should act like a man and apologize for it. Throwing tantrums and acting inconsolable is for three year olds. As are chest puffing and using physical intimidation.

 

happens in the heat of the moment. But being an adult requires you have a cool enough head - even in the moment - to apologize when you do something stupid and to know how to properly direct your anger. Then you pick up your club and beat the crap out of your own bag with it - or whatever you need to do to vent. If your pal wants to be a man, he needs to learn how to keep himself in control.

[Buddyjay]

If someone throws a club and it lands near me, I am definately going to say something...BUT IN A NICE MANNER.

It's not what you say, but how you say it that causes the problems.

I would not have "sugar coated" the reply but I would not have been confrontational as I returned the club to him. If the "thrower" now gets confrontational after he is in the wrong, now we have a problem. It's on him.

[mills225]

There are better ways to release some anger rather than throwing your club, but I think most people would understand how stupid they look like after almost hitting the group in front of you. In your case I agree with you, maybe say something right away to the guy, but there is no need for that guy to go back after your friend 3 holes later. Just let it go and move on.