Here's one for all the Classic Golfers

[rony]

An older, white haired man walked into a jewelry store one Friday evening with a beautiful young gal at his side. He told the jeweler he was looking for a special ring for his girlfriend.

 

The jeweler looked through his stock and brought out a $5,000 ring and showed it to him.

 

The old man said, "I don't think you understand, I want something very special."

 

At that statement, the jeweler went to his special stock and brought another ring over. "Here's a stunning ring at only $40,000", the jeweler said.

 

The young lady's eyes sparkled and her whole body trembled with excitement.

 

The old man seeing this said, "We'll take it."

 

The jeweler asked how payment would be made and the old man stated, by check. "I know you need to make sure my check is good, so I'll write it now and you can call the bank Monday to verify the funds and I'll pick the ring up Monday afternoon," he said.

 

Monday morning, a very teed-off jeweler phoned the old man. "There's no money in that account."

 

"I know", said the old man, "but can you imagine the weekend I had?" :rolleyes:

[TimV]

:cheesy:

[BIG STU]

ROTFLMFAO :cheesy:

[Guia]

Good one.

[Texsport]

Speaking of old men and sex - a friend sent me this..........

 

SEXUAL ACTIVITY OF SENIORS

 

The frequency of sexual activity of senior men depends on where you were born.

 

Statistics just released from the USA, Canada and the United Nations Team, reveal that....

 

1. North American men between 60 and 80 years of age, will on average, have sex two to three times per week.

 

2. Whereas Japanese men, in exactly the same age group, will have sex only once or twice per year if they are lucky

 

This comes as very upsetting news to most of my buddies at the golf course, as none of us had any idea we were Japanese!

[stevemcgee99]

There's a term wives give their older husbands tired on the weekend from looooongg hours of work and 3 hours of packed train rides: 粗大ごみ。Soudai Gomi.

 

It the word on the stickers the city government gives you when you have oversize garbage to toss, like a refrigerator or Christmas tree.

 

(Instead of 'my old man' they say 'my oversize garbage')...

[JDLA]

Now that is funny. Lol

[Texsport]

Experience counts!

 

A threesome of guys - 2 young bucks and an older gentleman were set to tee off when a beautiful blond strolled up and asked if she could join the group.

 

Naturally they agreed and enjoyed watching her all the way around.

 

When they reached the last green, the young lady announced, "If I make this putt, it'll be my best round ever, and whoever gives me the best advice allowing me to make it, can spend the evening with me"!

 

The first guy says, "I think it breaks an inch to the left".

 

The second young man advised "Don't leave it short".

 

The older guy says, "It's a gimme - pick it up"

 

Texsport

[Tim Schoch]

I've always liked this one.....

 

Two guys leave work and head to the course to play a quick round. They come up on a twosome of women that are playing at a slow pace.

 

The first guy says, "I'll go ask and see if we can play through." He makes it halfway and turns around.

 

The second guys asks "What gives?"

 

First guy says "That's my wife and my mistress."

 

"I'll go ask," says the second guy.

 

The second guy makes it halfway and turns back as well and replies, "Small world, huh?"