Golf Lies!

[TheHomez]

What lies have you heard from friends?

I decided to start this thread because of a story a classmate told me. Add any funny, rediculous, & crazy lie/lies your friends/people have told you or that you have heard: :ok:

So I'm at a bar with a bunch of classmates and we were talking about going out for a round the next morning. One guy from our class who was also there overhears us talking and jumps into the convo. We are talking about how difficult golf is (we're all n00bs) and he tells us its not that hard at all and goes on to tell us this story...

"As a matter of fact, I think its pretty easy. I had a roomated in college (from his undergraduate school so none of us can verify the story) who golfed all the time and was on his highschool team and our school team that asked me to go out with him for a round once. So, I told him I had never played or even held a club in my hands before aside from messing around at a range, but that I'd give it a shot."

"So we go out and I'm all nervous cuz I've heard he's really good and all. We start playing and I'm doing just as good as he is and he's shocked."

"So then we come to this one hole which is a par 5. I hit a great tee shot and have my second shot to hit over a hill and could barely see the flag. So I go ahead and hit it. Then my friend and I walk towards the green and don't see my ball. We're looking for it and he goes and checks the hole and yells OMG ITS IN! So basically I double eagled the hole my first time out. My friend said he'd never seen anything like it before...BLAH BLAH BLAH." :tongue:

WHAT A LIAR! There is no way he double eagled a par 5 his first time out. We all were like are you serious? Even though we were all thinking it was bull$*#% but didn't want to argue with him and he goes "yea, I mean it was rediculous, the pros barely even have double eagles. So, I don't think golf's that hard, it was my first time out"


This story just made me mad and I know you guys have heard some other lies, so lets hear em :lol:

[cpa49707]

this is just a general BS that everyone heres all the time. " I hit the ball 300+ yards off the tee"

 

well I think most people are full of BS. ITs an ego thing driven by the "Tiger Syndrome"

 

PS I can't stand Liars

[csiachos]

Yeah,

 

I love it when high handicappers say that they were hitting it 300 yards down the fairway. What a crock.

[phil75070]

Just saw one on another forum where a guy was on a launch monitor and his smash factor was 1.52. Maybe with the "dials tweaked". LOL

[wholeinwon]

i had one guy i play with from another club who is about I'd say a 4-6 handicap tells me he shot 71-70-74 in a tournament to lose in a playoff at -1...

 

later on in the week the weekly golf publication comes out with tournament results!!!!

 

 

86-82-88 finished 24th out of 30.....i brought the clipping to the next time we played and said "nice finish" and showed him... the look on his face and the backpedalling was priceless!!!

[DemolitionMan]

"I have a +2 index..."

 

B..H.....

[sergizmo]

"I have a +2 index..."

 

B..H.....

 

That's too funny. He only plays to it while alone or with DT. When other people play with him he's "having an off day".

[TheHomez]

i had one guy i play with from another club who is about I'd say a 4-6 handicap tells me he shot 71-70-74 in a tournament to lose in a playoff at -1...

 

later on in the week the weekly golf publication comes out with tournament results!!!!

 

 

86-82-88 finished 24th out of 30.....i brought the clipping to the next time we played and said "nice finish" and showed him... the look on his face and the backpedalling was priceless!!!

 

:lol:

 

Thats awesome, way to catch him in his own lie.

 

I can't stand liars either

[g13]

I told my wife I wouldn't get new clubs this year.

 

Lies.

[TheHomez]

I told my wife I wouldn't get new clubs this year.

 

Lies.

 

 

Thats one lie that I think we can all relate to :lol:

[wedgetoafoot]

What's wrong with a smash factor of 1.52? I've had this exact smash factor on a monitor just recently. It was an Accusport Vector and I had no idea you could rig those to produce different numbers. Is that true?

[allsouthpaw08]

i love liars, i think they are so funny because if you know you can challenge them to it at any time, you might as well just talk s*** until they challenge you and show them up, but anyways some kid in my highschool tryouts last year he tryed to tell me that he got three hole in ones in one round at a par 3 course, so we ask him which course (after we catch our breath from laughing so hard), and it turns out that me and my bestfriend know this course by heart which would be threetops, a treetops course in michigan where they play the apr 3 shootout, and we ask him which holes, and he just racked off three numbers something like "5, 12 and 17"but he did say 2, 2 digit #'s, but if you know anything about threetops course "IT ONLY HAS NINE HOLES STUPID A**!!!" so we caught him in his own lie. it was really funny.

[SW20 MR2]

I not sure if it's an outright lie or lack of knowledge, but a friend of mine started playing golf last year. A month or so after he started, he told me that his goal is to break 100. Okay, fair enough. A month later, he tells me that his best score to date was 87. I didn't believe him, but gave him the benefit of the doubt cause he's quite athletic. Anyways, fast forward a few months, I play a round with him and found out why he scores so low. If he hits a slice OB, he reloads but doesn't count his first ball at all. Same thing goes for approach shots. Hahahaha...ah well, I never play for money, so I don't bother saying anything.

[rj7807]

Every hack at the country club has the same old LIE.....that they're a 5 handicap or less. They par two or three holes a round so they are a scratch golfer. Til you take them on and they fire a 95, and blame it on the weather, or that they weren't on there game, or whatever.

 

Lieing about your true handicap is the biggest by far, not that it matters anyway.

[Geo]

worst lie of all time:

 

» Click to show Spoiler - click again to hide... «

it's your baby :lol:

 

beruo

[Damo75]

i had one guy i play with from another club who is about I'd say a 4-6 handicap tells me he shot 71-70-74 in a tournament to lose in a playoff at -1...

 

later on in the week the weekly golf publication comes out with tournament results!!!!

 

 

86-82-88 finished 24th out of 30.....i brought the clipping to the next time we played and said "nice finish" and showed him... the look on his face and the backpedalling was priceless!!!

 

Similar story here - a guy showed up at our club who said he was playing off 1 and had just missed out on getting his card at the Aussie Q-School. Said he had something like -1 for the 4 rounds to miss out by a shot or something like that.

 

I got onto a mate who actually was at the Q-school and got his card to check him out cause when I played with him he hit it OK, but certainly not to 1 hcp standard. My mate looked up the results and the guy had had something like 78-84-WD.

 

Was a pity I never saw him again to have a laugh at his expense. :drinks:

[parkinni]

I have a "friend" and regular weekend golf partner who is guilty of the following tall tales:

• Changes his driver every 6 months or so, and ALWAYS tells me that with the latest one he's been hitting the steel fab. storage shed beyond the end of our local driving range....on the fly! C-LANNNGG!!! The range is about 325 yards to the usual high netting at the end, and the storage shed is another 100-125 beyond that. How he can tell me this with a straight face, I don't know....but he does! We get to the course, and when he comes out of his shoes it finishes at 280. Rest of the time he's in the 240-260 range.
   
   
  
• Routinely shoots anywhere from the mid 80's to the high 90's off the regular men's tees when I play with him. Last weekend it was "92" (versus my honest 84) at one of the several courses of which he's a member, but he has both a front and back-nine mulligan, plus the disaster holes get adjusted to no worse than double-bogey on the par-4/5 holes, and double par on the 3's. His driving and putting can be pretty good, but he pulls a lot of his approach shots wide of the green. Put him there and he can take as many as 6 to get down sometimes. Always uses his 60° wedge and tries to flop (ie., scoop/blade) everything right next to the pin. Claims he's been playing off and on since he was 8 years old, and was in single digits through his teens and twenties (he's 43 now). Yeah, rrrrr-ight!
   
   
  
• He shoots the above scores week-in, week-out with me and my buddy, but when he travels out of state for work/vacation, he comes back with stories of hitting a 68, 71, 73, or 77 at some of the spendy courses throughout the South-East (Legends 'IronHorse' in TN, for example). And he's been playing from the championship tees, too!!! Then proceeds to tell us that he can't understand why he's back in the 90's again with us? Although, he did tell me once that I played a tad too slow for him.
  

Bottom line is that this guy is a legend in his own mind, plus he's smitten with an early case of OldTimer's or something. If it wasn't for the fact that he always drives us around and never asks for gas money, I'd have to tell him that he's full of sh*t! As it is, at $2.50 a gallon, it's a small price to pay to hear the bull!

[jleffell]

Every hack at the country club has the same old LIE.....that they're a 5 handicap or less. They par two or three holes a round so they are a scratch golfer. Til you take them on and they fire a 95, and blame it on the weather, or that they weren't on there game, or whatever.

 

Lieing about your true handicap is the biggest by far, not that it matters anyway.

 

This adds to the above:

 

I have played with those 5-handicappers and it seems like since they are so good they do not have to putt anything within 8 feet. My favorite is when they give the putt to themselves, or ask me to give it (in a non-money match, so I do) and then they try their putt and miss. Guess which score goes on the card and into the GHIN?

 

I putt everyting out and some people get mad, but what is the point of a handicap if most people abuse it.

 

I wonder what my handicap would be if I didn't have to worry about those pesky putts.

 

Josh

[Sandy_Hook]

Josh, I know exactly what you're talking about. I was playing in Las Vegas and got teamed up with a guy who took all of about fifteen seconds to tell me that he shoots 64s and 65s regularly. He was a decent striker of the ball, he stuck three or four iron shots tight, and could bomb it off the tee, but he NEVER putted ANYTHING from inside six feet, he just picked them up.

[golfr03]

I like to listen to the kids on my golf team who brag about hitting it 280-300 then when they get on the course it is 200-220...I just laugh at them.

[Clemson656]

• He shoots the above scores week-in, week-out with me and my buddy, but when he travels out of state for work/vacation, he comes back with stories of hitting a 68, 71, 73, or 77 at some of the spendy courses throughout the South-East (Legends 'IronHorse' in TN, for example). And he's been playing from the championship tees, too!!! Then proceeds to tell us that he can't understand why he's back in the 90's again with us? Although, he did tell me once that I played a tad too slow for him.
  

I guess this kind of golfers are everywhere. One of them is a friend of mine. When he plays with us, he always shoot in the high 90s even with one mulligan front and one mulligan back and "mis-count" at least 6-7 strokes a round. When he goes to play with his friends, he never shoots higher than 90 and he even breaks 80 from time to time. Another friend of mine who is a high handicapper who normally shoots about 110-120 even laughs about it.

 

Not only that, he always "ask" for his score. For example, one time, at a par-3 hole, he shot into the water. Hit another one from the tee box into the water again. He asked for 6. The high handicapper even asked me how this could be because he also shot in the water (same hole), took a drop, chipped over the green, chipped it back on the green and made three putts to get 7. He said, with his second shot in the water, either he took another good shot from the tee box or he took a drop and also a good shot to get it close to the pin and then he had to make one putt to get 6.

 

Or, sometimes, when he shoots 8 or 9, he'll ask for a double-bogey.

 

Another thing is, when no one is looking, he always finds his ball in a good spot. Hmm...

 

The worst lie out of this guy was this. It's a par 4. He hit his drive into the woods. He went to look, but couldn't find it. Take a drop by the woods. (I know. It's not legal, but...) Hit it into the woods again. He went in to look for his ball. He claimed he found the ball. Tried to hit it out, but ended up in the woods again. He took the ball out to drop by the woods. Hit it onto the fringe. Chipped to the fringe on the other side. Chipped it back on and made two putts. Can you guess the score he told us he shot? If you guess 6, you're right. One of our playing partners even asked him if he actually shot 6 when he hit into the woods like that. His response was, "He didn't play that bad this hole."

 

In his mind, he's broke 80. But I don't know if he's ever broke legit 100.

[Lowpro]

"WENT OUT AND PLAYED 18 BY MYSELF--- SHOT MY LOW ROUND OF A LIFE TIME"

:)

[TheHomez]

Great stories everyone, now keep em coming :)

[Golf_Beauty]

I was buying a new driver just the other day when the sales guy tells me he has a swing speed of 132-35. :tongue: Yeah right. ;) Even Tiger's is not that fast (125-28, last time I read). He was so full of it. I wanted so bad to call him on it. I didn't know the guy and he obviously wanted me to be impressed, so all I did was nod and say in the most monotone voice I could muster. "Yeah, that's okay." :)

[mrpheebz]

i have 3 from the sam guy:

1.) This guy is gunna pay me $4,000 to play in a member-guest with him at some country club (this coming from a 7.6 handicap)

2.) Yea this past weekend I got paired up with this guy who plays number 5 on MArshal's golf team and i beat him on every hole

And 3 the worst of all) (Durin the wee of the Masters)Yea last night when I got back from Georgia my girlfriend gto a call from her grandpa (which is supposedly Tom Kite but a total lie) and she handed me the phone and he was sittin in the locker room of Augusta National and he sitting next to Phil and Vijay was in the corner talkin to Tom Watson

[SCameron009]

Guys that hit it 300 yards off the tee and shoot around par all the time. Generally the response is, 'Wow that's pretty good, let's go play for a buck a hole'...it works every time!

 

Now if the guy is telling the truth, it's a really fun match - if not? Then hey, reality check bud... :)

 

- Bryan

[TheHomez]

Guys that hit it 300 yards off the tee and shoot around par all the time. Generally the response is, 'Wow that's pretty good, let's go play for a buck a hole'...it works every time!

 

Now if the guy is telling the truth, it's a really fun match - if not? Then hey, reality check bud... :)

 

- Bryan

 

Thats a great idea Bryan, make them put their money where their mouth is, I should do that to my friend who lied...

[dukesweb]

The +18 handicapper who says "I am a good ball striker - I just have a terrible short game". :)