I Can't Stand Playing Golf With My Father!

[ICANPUTT]

Anyone juniors agree?

I for one can not play a round of golf with my father without becoming extremely angry. Today he hit my ball by accident on three occasions. After the first time I asked him to make sure before hitting next time that it was indeed his ball. I even mark my ball with a sharpie so it can been seen easiely. I even on one occasion said, "Check that.....I think that's my ball." Another thing that really gets to me is the constant uneeded advice/comments while playing. For insance I had a putt today that broke maybe 1/2 a cup. I clearly pushed it severly and missed the hole. He goes......"You can always play the putts straight in and ram them in the back." On another instance I hooked an iron and shortsided myself. He says. "You never learn, you have to shoot at the center of the green." I then tell him I know this and was aming at the center of the green. It just little things like this that go on all day and by time the back nine roles around I am ready to explode. Another thing that gets to me is he never knows where his ball is........so I am constantly redirecting the cart.

Anyone else have people like that they just can't play with? If so what did you do?

[matt411]

i know i am not a junior (28 yrs old), and your dad probably frustrates the hell out of you on the course. But, treasure this time you get to spend with him on the course. Its one of the few sport related activities fathers and sons can do together. My dad and I never used to get along when i was a younger but most of my memories with him over the last 10 years are on the course. Don't let it get to you so much that you end up not playing with him anymore. Good Luck. Matt

[alpha_pro]

dude, just be happy you can actaully share a day golfing with your father. i wish i was you in that sense. im 26 and lost my dad when i was 10. i never got to do anything with him.

 

 

 

but i do understand what you mean, i have friends who just started and have no respect for the game or when people are in the middle of their backswing. i just golf with them because they are my friends, but not too often.

[ICANPUTT]

Agreed. It's just so fustrating. I mean he is a good player and has helped my game greatly. It's still really fustrating though. It just stinks when you go to the course, spend two hours on the putting green, and get a lecture on how you need to stop spending time working on the range and go practice your putting more.

[Spilly]

My good friends dad just died a month ago, and its taught me to really enjoy the time u spend with your dad.

[DougnDallas]

Enjoy the fact that your dad will play with you and use the time to move the relationship forward; say things that you would not normally say!

[expunge]

My dad punched out a marshall at my first caddied tournament. He wasn't on the bag the next day. Because I wasn't allowed back on the course.

 

He passed away 6 months later. Cherish it. I did. I laughed my a** off that day.

[SacTown24]

bro i know exactly where ur comin from- id just say "hey dad, i enjoy playing golf with u, but quit with the remarks, i dont need them and they dont do s*** to help"

[Furrankee]

I for one can not play a round of golf with my father without becoming extremely angry. Today he hit my ball by accident on three occasions. After the first time I asked him to make sure before hitting next time that it was indeed his ball. I even mark my ball with a sharpie so it can been seen easiely. I even on one occasion said, "Check that.....I think that's my ball." Another thing that really gets to me is the constant uneeded advice/comments while playing. For insance I had a putt today that broke maybe 1/2 a cup. I clearly pushed it severly and missed the hole. He goes......"You can always play the putts straight in and ram them in the back." On another instance I hooked an iron and shortsided myself. He says. "You never learn, you have to shoot at the center of the green." I then tell him I know this and was aming at the center of the green. It just little things like this that go on all day and by time the back nine roles around I am ready to explode. Another thing that gets to me is he never knows where his ball is........so I am constantly redirecting the cart.

 

Anyone else have people like that they just can't play with? If so what did you do?

 

My dad's the same way. We'll play with another two-some and during the round, whenever the other player hits the ball in the air and in the direction of the flag, he'll say good shot not knowing that the guy shanked the ball. The guy has low standards when it comes to golf. Any ball in the air - good shot. Any ball out of the bunker and onto the green - good shot. 3 foot putt - gimmie. On all par 4 or 5, he's always saying "why don't you use your driver?" The guy has no course management, no patience for putting and chipping. He's always complaining about the group in front of him.

 

The worst is, every time we play together, he always tells me he can't play good golf when we're playing together.

[pitbull808]

I'm no junior but I needed to add to this post. I just finished a three day Member/Guest tournament with my Father. We played lousy but had a great time. I've been lucky to be playing golf with my Father for 30+ years and even played under him when he was my Coach during High School. We fought a lot when I was young and hard headed but the memories we have good and bad will never be forgotten or replaced.

 

Enjoy the time you have with your father. He's not out there to hurt you. You've been his best friend since you were born and he loves you. One day you'll look back hopefully without a tear in your eye and wish you could be back on the course with him.

 

Now go and hug your father and thank him for being there for you.

[seahwk95]

I had days like that as a junior. I even gave up golf for several years and didn't pick it back up until I was in college. My dad is in his early 70s and I can't think of a better way to spend a day on the golf course. He's alot shorter off the tee but damn he can roll it on the greens still. I don't have a whole helluva lot of time left with him, at least golf-wise, so I cherish each day I get to spend out there with him and my brother. Point is, you will learn to appreciate the advice he gives, wise or not. I probably go to my father for advice more now than when growing up. The older he and I get, the more I realize he knew what he was talking about all those years.

 

Why don't you tuck a copy of this post and maybe even some responses away and pick it back up in about 20 or 30 years. My guess is you'll be appalled that you made a post like this. Good luck

[Ty_Webb]

Sounds to me like you're a lucky guy. You get to play with your dad and he obviously cares about you or he wouldn't say those things. It also sounds like you're taking on board what he says to you. Perhaps if he gives you a lecture about how you should be practising your putting more after you spent hours practising your putting, you could say something like "yeah Dad, sound advice, that's why I spent the last two hours on the putting green." He wants to help, so don't begrudge him the opportunity to help his kid out.

 

The rest of my thoughts on this pitbull already put far better than I ever could, so I'm not going to try. Good luck.

[cpa49707]

Forget about it, enjoy the time you have with him, remember its just a game and don't take it so serious when playing with your father. Use it as a time to talk to him and get to know each other. life is short. remember don't let the little things in life bother you, and beleive me this is very little.

 

Beleive since I just lost my father-in-law less than 2 weeks ago, you can't bring them back so cherrish this time you have with hime.

[Spumoni]

I lost my dad a few years ago but always enjoyed the few times we got to play together. I have a 15 year old son who's primary sport is soccer but plays golf when he has time. He gets pretty frustrated while playing golf mostly because soccer doesn't allow him to practice or play too often. I try to tell him to forget the score & how he's playing and just enjoy playing & being together. Lifes too short to get pissed on the golf course...

[JoeF]

I agree with most of these answers. I'm a lot older than you and probably older then your dad. My Dad was inept at most any sport he tried. but I fondly remember any attempts he made. It was more about spending some time together. Dad's been gone about 8 years now and I sure do miss those days. My son is grown, married and has kids of his own and we only get to golf together once in a while, but we have a good time and don't care much about the score. Enjoy your dad no matter how much he infuriates you because he won't be around forever.

[upndowninthree]

It's been said before, but he is your dad afterall. Do you think all the d*mbWord not allowed things you've done incite him to go on a public board and complain about it? If I could think back to all the stuff he had to deal with when I was growing up it doesn't hold a candle to the little stuff he does now. I actually caused trouble and put him in some precarious positions, what he does is just funny. My dad can't break a 100 on the golf course, but still offers advice(you gotta hit more fairways) and probably always will. Your family and your dog are the only things in life that are truly unconditional, not for one second is he trying to make you feel bad or embarress you, so take it easy, he used to change your dirty diapers and wipe your butt after you crapped yourself. And why are the things he does your problem? He was a man long before you were an embryo, he can take care of himself, shame and pride are both useless. By the way next time you go out and play you could always throw a 66 at him and maybe that would help.

[ICANPUTT]

My dad's the same way. We'll play with another two-some and during the round, whenever the other player hits the ball in the air and in the direction of the flag, he'll say good shot not knowing that the guy shanked the ball. The guy has low standards when it comes to golf. Any ball in the air - good shot. Any ball out of the bunker and onto the green - good shot. 3 foot putt - gimmie. On all par 4 or 5, he's always saying "why don't you use your driver?" The guy has no course management, no patience for putting and chipping. He's always complaining about the group in front of him.

 

The worst is, every time we play together, he always tells me he can't play good golf when we're playing together.

 

...........thats sounds exactly like mine also. I agree that years from now I will look back and love the times we played. Maybe I should just start playing an orange ball so he dosen't get them mixed up........ :D .

[Placebo]

Some very good advice in here along the lines of cherish these times and you'll miss him when he's gone, so on and so forth. Only problem with that is it doesn't really give you any good advice to help address the issue. I'm guessing that you probably start getting pent up well before the round knowing that the, "little" things Dad does are going to frustrate you to the point of negatively affecting your game. That being said I would work on creating a more positive mindset prior to the round which should allow you to not get as frustrated and recognize the situation for what it is, and more importantly, the day that golfing with pops turns into a memory is drawing far too near. Keep things in perspective, as others have said, realize that his intentions are good regardless of the way you want to interprate them. I think if you prepare yourself mentally for what is to come you will be able to deal with it much better. So try focusing on all the positive things that happen when you golf with your Dad as opposed to the negative ones. If you don't have any then try this on for perspective: There are literally millions of people that would gladly donate a limb to be in your shoes and have the opportunity that you have. I am one of them.

[Charlie_Foxtrot]

Ditto on what everyone else has said.

 

One of the truest sayings ever uttered is "My father was an amazing man. The older I got, the smarter he got." - Mark Twain

 

You probably won't understand that until later in life, but I assure you, as you grow older, you will slowly start to recognize your father's intelligence, experience, wisdom, and wit. None of us thought we would, and now we all do. I'm a grown a** man, and I still call my dad for advice on things like buying a new car and major home repairs. Why? Because I value his opinion and experience, and I'm not ashamed to admit it.

 

Fathers are genetically programmed to give advice, even if it's bad sometimes. Whenever he does it, and it gets on your nerves, just start thinking, "He's just trying to help because he loves me and he wants to see me succeed."

 

Another one that works for me (both for friendly advice and in response to idiot drivers) is "in the grand scheme of things, is this really worth my energy to get upset or annoyed about." Almost always, the answer is "No, this is not worth stressing myself out."

 

You are not alone. Everyone's father bugged them at your age. If people got along with their parents forever, they would never leave home. And that would be bad - not everyone can be a Star Trek geek living in their parent's basement. Just trust me, some day not so far away, you WILL cherish these golf outings. And the sooner you recognize that, the more enjoyable they will be.

 

My advice - just let it go, no matter how frustrating it seems at the moment. And keep golfing with your dad.

 

And to add my own story: When I came back for the summer after my first year of college, my father said that he had tickets to a Texas Rangers' baseball game on the 4th of July and asked if I wanted to go with him. The Rangers were losing as usual, it was a hotter than usual Texas summer, this was before the nice, new ballpark, and my father isn't really a baseball fan. But I said yes. That night Nolan Ryan pitched a 4 hit shutout and then we watched the 4th of July fireworks. To this day, the memory of sitting with my father and watching in amazement as Ryan mowed down batter after batter is one of my most cherished memories.

[dan360]

I turned 29 last Friday.

 

My father turned 70 last December.

 

 

Having a dad that was so much older than I (he was 41 when I was born) meant we really butted heads over all the typical father/son issues.

 

He's never been a golfer--the closest we've got to a round is when he bladed a sand wedge across the back yard and through the kitchen window while my mom was doing the dishes...blamed it on me, of course. LOL

 

Anyways, another old guy here with another vote for don't let his comments rile you up, he's just being a father...someday you'll have kids and find yourself doing the same stuff. You might not believe you will or believe that you'll do it, but ya will....we all do.

 

Now go give him a hug, tell him you love him, but remind him you're the better golfer.

[ICANPUTT]

Thanks guys. No worries......I will charish the time I have with him. :D One of my fondest memories of my father was at the State championship a couple years back. It was 28 degrees.......snowing....hailing.....30MPH winds. Of course in Michigan we don't think to cancel the state championship..... :D . He walked all 18 holes both days weeks after hip replacement because he wanted to be there and they wouldn't give him a cart. Stood through multiple frost delays......and fought the elements.

 

I appreciate you guys taking the time to respond with your advice..........and I guess maybe if I didn't shortside myself 8 times a round I might not get the lecture.

[akap4surf]

I like playing with my dad, but my grandfather Who taught me golf is the worst!!! I have gotten my game as good as it ever has been, but he can't ever say i hit a good shot. i shot a 2 under at a local golf course when he was here and the nicest thing he said to m,e was that i didn't shape my iron shots well.

 

But i know how difficult it is to play with a family member you don't like and i feel your pain

[jportz]

Hey bro...you're catching a lot of flack for this post but I can tell that you love your dad and didn't mean for everyone to beat up on you so bad. Just laugh it off when he hits your ball....unless you're playing for money, then you might need to thump on him a bit. :D

 

My dad and I recently played in a Parent / Child tourney. It was alternate shot and he's a 16 handicap and I'm a 7 so I had to play his crummy shots all day and it was hard not to get frustrated with him. I got pretty frustrated the first day....his short game sucks so I would get mad if he messed up an easy chip shot (easy for me). We managed to scrape it around for a net 71 and were somewhere around 20th place but I had a poor attitude all day long.

 

The next day was different, I started out by reminding myself how lucky I am that I even have the opportunity to be playing golf with my dad and I went out with the attitude of just having fun and enjoying his company. Well the good attitudes rubbed off on our game and we shot a net 65 and ended up coming from behind to win the bronze medal. It was a great day that I'll always remember.

 

The picture of my dad and I holding our bronze medal is something I will cherrish forever.. ..and hopefully I can share that experience with my son someday. I'm sure he'll be thinking "dang, I have to hit my dad's crummy shots all day" :D

[axeman310]

What is worse is that my dad's game had taken a trip into the toilet up until a couple of weeks ago. When I was still going through the process of learning the game and finding a swing, he would get pissed when I showed any negative emotion after a bad shot. Now, he gets more pissed off than I ever did when he hits a bad shot and proceeds to drop and hit balls until he gets it right. When we go out in the afternoon to play nine, either he gets fed up with playing badly or I get tired of watching him get pissed and waiting for his 7 from everywhere that we usually leave after 4 or 5 holes. Also, for the longest time he refused to get any kind of lesson, which just annoyed me more. Luckily, all is good now that he's seen the pro at our course and his game immediately stepped up to the best it's been in a long time. I only wish now he'd gotten a lesson 5 months ago when his game started going south.

[Ian_123456]

i really enjoy playing with my dad i find its really good competition just for bragging rights at home and we both seem to the match each others great shot and well alot of the bad shots too haha but the one thing i hate about playing with my dad was that one time he outdrove me when i said "long drive contest" that was 2 years ago and ive heard about it every round haha

[Ty Webb]

Let me give the perspective from the other side of the coin. I am 38 yrs old, my son just turned 17... a junior to be in HS. I started him golfing when he was about 7 or 8. He had a natural sweet swing from the first day to the point where the people on the clubhouse deck that overlooks the 1st tee would gather to watch him smoke the ball 225-250 when he was 10 yrs old. He has progressed to the top level of Jr golf becoming a very good competitive golfer. We used to play about 100 rounds a year together, I would say now we average 10 rounds a year or less... he has no desire to hang around with me even though I feel I am still hip and can still post a decent score ( I hover from a 7 to a 10 hcp). I guess what I am trying to say is enjoy this time with your father because he treasures it and when the time comes that you dont spend time with him on the course it will leave a big hole in his heart. Us dads dont care who wins or who plays bad, it is all about memories for later in life. It isnt the same to go play without my son... I look back at the last 9 or 10 years we played alot together and realize that those were good times. Also if your dad seems to be breaking your stones with advice he is not... he just wants you to do well and is only trying to help (even if his advice sucks..lol) I guess what I am trying to say is go play with your dad and enjoy each others company as even if it doesnt mean much to you it means the world to him... I guarantee it.

[The Boom Bapp]

Bro, Tell your father how you feel, let him know that he is important in your life and that you enjoy the times your are together but Let him know when he upsets you, or makes you proud.

 

My son is 4 and I have been teaching him to be honest with me and to let me know how he feels, no matter what it is we are doing he can tell me if he does not like how I do things.

 

I respect what he says and it just let's me know that he is listening and in return makes me as a father more confident that I or others will not be able to pressure him into things he may not want to do or should not do. His handle on Self Reliance impresses me even with him being 4.

 

My father worked away from home for a long while and never played sports, he was into Martial Arts and in order for me to get close to my dad I had to participate in his life which in turn made him notice mine. After that he was involved fully in what my brother and I decided to persue. He would always give somesort of advice but he knew that if he ever started to get pushy we had the freedom to express any discomfort in what was being said. He will appreciate you strength and honesty. He will feel as though his dreams for you are being fulfilled.

 

 

Best of luck.

[vthokie1157]

yea, i don't have too fun of a time playing with my dad because he will make maybe some comments about my swing which you just don't want to hear on the course and also he dsnt reall know what he's talking about, but i just have to treat it as a nice casual round because it is much different than playing my serious, deliberate and walking (not riding) round...i have just come to find that is the best way to do it. (btw im 15) I do look u pto my dad though because he cares about the game and is the one who got me into it and likes to see me excel in waht i love.

 

- actually waht i do sometimes is have a lil competition comin down the stretch or something like that but the prob is that once i get that done with and my drive is gone, i do poorly. i just have to have something meaningful to play for.

[VTHOKIES]

This post got me to thinking how it was for me and my dad to play together when I was a teenager. I use to be just like you and get a little pissed off on the course at my dad for bad shots that I hit. It was always his fault which was just not true now that I am 41. We are playing together tomorrow and I can't wait. We so much enjoy our time together now and each and every time we play there is always a story or two told which cracks us up. My dad usually will start by saying remember when you were young and you did this/that or whatever. I cherish each and everytime we play together now and realize that my pops was just trying to help whether I thought so or not.

 

Just like everyone said, enjoy the time you have together.

[rickiegolfer]

Dude how could you say you hate playing with your Father. you should just be thanful