Kinda Losing the Mojo

[ScooterMcTavish]

Hey All,

 

Firstly, thanks for being an awesome web community. Although we live in different countries on different continents, this is one of the most civil islands on the Interweb, and the level of encouragement and enthusiasm we have would be hard to match anywhere else.

 

So I seem to be having a problem.....I'm losing my mojo.

 

I have to say, I wasn't sure what rabbit trail I started down by first picking up my '63 Turfriders, then picking up and regularly gaming my FG-17's. By doing this, it led me to this section of the forum, and has created a bit of a monster in that I cannot go by a thrift store without looking for clubs/bags/balls/etc. Regardless, I redeveloped an enthusiasm for the game last year that I had not had since my teens.

 

However, this year, this enthusiasm seems to have dwindled a bit. Sure, I still love vintage clubs, and sure, I'm still working on getting a wooden driver in the bag full time. However, I am just not quite as enthused about golfing as I was last year, trying out all the pretty sticks that I seemed to keep finding for only pennies. For example, I became so frustrated with slow play during league last night that I walked off the course after 3 holes, so I could go home and do some laundry. Yes, that's right, I chose doing laundry over golf. Mind you, taking one shot every five minutes might be enough to make anyone prefer to do laundry.

 

Maybe I'm reading too much into this, but even last weekend, I went to the course, sprayed the ball all over for five holes, and decided to go home. The sad part was I realized that I simply didn't care about my round, and that (again) I had other things I could be doing at home. Maybe part of this is that I always viewed golf as a solitary pursuit, but now I am finding I am enjoying golfing with others more than I used to. Possibly part of this is that golf used to act as a pressure valve for me, but as life is going pretty good, I don't need this valve quite as much.

 

Not sure if I maybe need a little vacation from golf, or maybe need at least one other hobby besides golf? Or more clubs? Just not sure.

 

Anyone else gone through a similar set of the blahs? If so, how'd you get out of them?

[oldschoolrocker]

Scott,
There is an ebb and flow in all areas of life. Golf is no different. I find myself getting a bit more disenchanted from time to time. I have only played two 18 hole rounds since I have been back. Left after nine this afternoon, just too hot and too slow. If I had paid for a cart I would have stuck it out purely to get my monies worth.
The joy is not in how much you play, but in how much you get from the times you do play. I enjoy going to the range, striking a bucket, and chipping and putting as much as playing most of the time. There are rounds when I am preoccupied and can't fully give the concentration needed for a round.
Take some time to reflect and whatever you decide will be what's best for you.
Randy

[birly-shirly]

[quote name='ScooterMcTavish' timestamp='1401994320' post='9437141']
Or more clubs?
[/quote]

Or fewer?

Seriously.

It's just an idea, but by your own admission, you're chopping and changing irons and drivers.

I think you can get away with that, if you approach it with a mindset of enjoying the variety but having low expectations.

But if you're looking for some sort of magic bullet, then I think that can easily be counter-productive. If you ever find yourself worrying about whether you've brought the [b][i]right set of clubs/the right shafts/the right muscleback design [/i][/b]to the course, then I think you're sunk. Ask me how I know ;-)

I think you even said yourself on another thread that most blades play pretty similarly. I would agree - and tend to view the differences as aesthetic matters of preference, rather than anything terribly functional. Even with shafts, I'm no long hitter and it doesn't seem to make any great difference to me whether I play regular or stiff.

I wouldn't ever tell you what to do. Only you really know whether the extra choice is part of the fun, or getting in the way of your enjoyment.

Personally, I've always loved solitary golf as much as, and probably more than, competitive or social golf. And that kind of golf just lends itself to empty courses and light, half-empty bags of clubs.

[Kirasdad]

This is an important topic, worth a good discussion so I hope the folks weigh in with their usual thoughtfulness.

"The joy is not in how much you play, but how much you get in the times you do play."

This from OSR really cuts to the heart of the matter, and something we all should keep in mind. My golfing life has changed markedly in the last few years for a variety of reasons. Strangely enough, having a child fairly late in the game is not one of them, if anything I play a bit more than I might otherwise taking Kira along for company. No, my reasons range all the way from philosophical to economic. Golf is frightfully expensive here in LA, and while I would say certainly we have enough resources to go around, it's irresponsible I believe for me to shell out 80-150 bucks every time I want to play golf, and so, I accordingly, pick my spots. However, the real reason I changed my golfing life was I got completely fed up with almost everything associated with the game, the cost, the goofy equipment, slow play which is so ubiquitous here in the US and it is so damaging to the sport. The Great Recession also put a big dent in my regular game. I had five or six guys I played with on a regular basis back ten years ago. Then 07/08 came along, two of them went broke, one got a divorce, and one moved away for better prospects. By 2010 I was so disenchanted with golf and my association with it that I had virtually quit playing. Then my wife read an article in a the newspaper about some guys down in San Diego that had formed a hickory golf group. She said "that so sounds like something you'd like, why don't you go down there and check it out." A couple of weeks later it was my birthday and I somewhat dutifully went, they gave me a set to use, and I had an absolute blast. It gave me sort of a new outlook on golf. I have since gotten into vintage somewhat, but hickory still gets most of my golf time and with the exception of a couple of local tournaments and the one big hickory SoHG event I go to every year, I play most of my golf alone, or with my kid in the evenings. My actual play has gone down probably 50 per cent in the past decade, but frankly I enjoy it much more.

[Kirasdad]

[quote name='birly-shirly' timestamp='1402010888' post='9438801']
[quote name='ScooterMcTavish' timestamp='1401994320' post='9437141']
Or more clubs?
[/quote]

Or fewer?

Seriously.

It's just an idea, but by your own admission, you're chopping and changing irons and drivers.

I think you can get away with that, if you approach it with a mindset of enjoying the variety but having low expectations.

But if you're looking for some sort of magic bullet, then I think that can easily be counter-productive. If you ever find yourself worrying about whether you've brought the [b][i]right set of clubs/the right shafts/the right muscleback design [/i][/b]to the course, then I think you're sunk. Ask me how I know ;-)

I think you even said yourself on another thread that most blades play pretty similarly. I would agree - and tend to view the differences as aesthetic matters of preference, rather than anything terribly functional. Even with shafts, I'm no long hitter and it doesn't seem to make any great difference to me whether I play regular or stiff.

I wouldn't ever tell you what to do. Only you really know whether the extra choice is part of the fun, or getting in the way of your enjoyment.

Personally, I've always loved solitary golf as much as, and probably more than, competitive or social golf. And that kind of golf just lends itself to empty courses and light, half-empty bags of clubs.
[/quote]

Just read this after I posted mine.

+1 Very. Well. Said.

[oldschoolrocker]

Splendid post Kdad.
I suspect I would enjoy a solitary walk with a set of hickories.

[ScooterMcTavish]

Thank you gentlemen,

 

The usual thoughtfulness from all of you.

 

Funny enough, before coming here and reading these posts, I had gone to the local thrift at lunch today. Not much in the club department, but I found a lightweight stand bag that looked like it would good for carrying over the shoulder. Plus, Randy and I had exchanged some thoughts on a different thread about old fashioned set composition, with the 1 and 3 woods, and the 3, 5, 7, 9 irons and a putter.

 

Guess this was in the back of my mind, as I grabbed the bag (for a whopping $4), brought it home, and went rummaging in the garage. Sure enough, I put together a nice little 7 piece Wilson Staff set with my Tour Block II 1 and 3 woods, and 3,5,7,9 FG-17s, plus a Billy Casper.

 

 

See, the eldest Scooter Jr. has been wanting to go walking in the mornings, and we are going to motivate each other to go. So I thought, what better place to walk than the golf course that is 3 minutes from my front door. So, we'll go for a walk there tomorrow AM. A lightweight traditional bag seemed like a pretty good idea. Sad enough, I had the matching green barrel covers in the garage, with a matching green golf towel.

 

 

Maybe I'm not tired of golf.....maybe I'm tired of being on a crowded course, riding in a cart, and drinking beer just to pass the five minutes between shots. B-S, messing with the gear is half the fun, though I typically will stick with one set for a few months to see if it is a keeper or not. If anything, using the different gear makes it fun for me, and I never worry about if I brought the right set to the course.

 

KD and Randy, your usual thoughtful selves, and funny that I am going to take my daughter to the course with me tomorrow AM for company. Let's see what I can get out of the round, eh? I've even thrown these in the bag - they may get hit for fun even.

 

 

I think you all hit on something very important in your posts - it's not golf I'm tired of. I should enjoy it being a solitary sport. And I should get frustrated when play is grindingly slow. And if I want company, my daughter is a great companion. And I can play whatever I want to because I can. To paraphrase Randy, it isn't how often I am golfing - it is obvious that I am not getting something from it that I need to be.

 

Let's see how this works out.

[BIG STU]

I can remember when I hated golf. That came back from the days when I was trying to do it for a living on the minis and playing calcuttas. I quit playing for 6 years or so. i moved down here to the beach and started out playing again. We had a good group to play with on the weekends when my friend had his golf shop. Well my friend passed on and our group split up. I play with a few different people now and then. Recently I have been training so to speak to try to play some mini events this summer since I am now old enough to play "super senior' division. So I have been playing and practicing with my modern gamers. Hope you guys and ladies dont throw me off here or un friend me for this. Scooter thanks you have put this in perspective for me. This Sunday after church I am going to put together one of my vintage sets like you did with a few clubs and walk 9 at my home course. I do appreciate the walk and it is almost a religous experience for me when I used to do this. It does help me relax by my self and enjoy the pretty birds , turtles and golf course the Good Lord created. My vintage Mac set is in its staff bag ready to go. What I think I am going to do is take my vintage Sun Jet or Sun Mountain bag and do a set up like yours with different vintage clubs and go. In fact i am going to go to the shop when I get off here and do that very thing. thanks a million

[oldschoolrocker]

I for one think that is a splendid idea. I know from my own perspective that just because one is on the course, "playing golf" does not mean one is garnering any enjoyment from it. And, then comes the question, "What's the purpose?"
A purposeful walk with a minimalist set can do wonders for the golfing soul. As we have battered before. Why do we play? What is the object of our outings? A final score to tally, or a few well struck shots along the way. For me, when it becomes an all consuming number game, and my reflection of the round rests entirely upon what was penned on paper, then I have lost irregardless of the score.
Yes, a few rounds with a minimalist bag will do just fine. Now if I could just find some playable hickories without breaking the bank.

[ScooterMcTavish]

Well, we had a nice little 5 hole outing this AM - I even played the white Hogan ball on the first hole. Unfortunately, I noticed the cover was cracked after putting it in, so it went back into the bag, to be followed by some Slazenger Raw Distance Feels.

Boy those FG-17s are squirrely girls. the sweet spot is definitely closer to the heel than it is on my Maxflis or Radials. This being stated, when you hit 'em on the sweet spot, it is unlike either of the afore mentioned clubs. They feel good on a well struck shot. The FG-17s feel like shaking the hand of God (or some other poetic prose).

Funny how quickly we miss having a full set of clubs. However, I can't say my scoring was much different.....it was a usual early morning erratic round, a product of grogginess and stiff backness.

Regardless, Scooter Jr. the Sr. enjoyed our walk. We made fun of the geese, saw an oriole, and enjoyed a cool, mosquito-free walk. And I think I may have put my finger on my issues with golf lately.

The company was awesome, the minimalist bag over the shoulder was fun, the Hogan ball was great. In other words, the golf itself was fine.

The issue is that I believe I am bored with my home course. Sure, I'd still like to break par and have been very close - best odds are of doing it on my course. But it has almost become routine. I mean, I didn't even need to line up three of my putts as I knew the line already. K-D, in the expensive LA-Land, you mentioned that you have to ration your golf somewhat due to dollars. Here, I pay $300/year for unlimited golf. Can't argue with the thrift on that, though this is a local municipal course that does not possess the level of charm and manicuring that a more expensive course would have. Point being, I have played in the neighbourhood of 97% of my rounds on this course since taking up golf again about 6 years ago, and I think I simply need a little more variety.

One of the struggles has been that as I've gone to vintage irons exclusively, I enjoy the variety of shots I can hit. Still not great with the fade, but I can hit anything from a mild to hard draw. If it is windy, I can punch a nice hard low 2 or 3 iron. I can both draw and fade my persimmon fairways. Plus, using the bullseye has put a lot of the putting feel back into the game for me. I mean, when I can tell you my tee clubs for the entire 9 holes before even going to the course (D, 6i, 3i, 8i, D, D, 7i, 5W, D), and likely my second shot clubs (7i, 7i, PW, P, 9i, 5W, P, PW, 5W), this has become routine, and nothing "special" any more. Maybe this is why I like swapping gear so much - at least it adds a new challenge and variety to what would otherwise be a routine round.

At least carrying a cut-down bag, a different putter, and walking with a shoulder carry added some spice to a normally routine round. So unless I'm chasing score (which we try to avoid doing) or playing competitively, my lack of motivation to play this particular course is what appears to have brought on the doldrums. Part of the fun of golfing is the thrill of discovery - discovering a bird's nest, discovering you can hit over or around a certain tree, discovering new and beautiful views on a new course. Unfortunately, there's very little left for me to discover on my home course.

Big Stu, we'll never pitch you out of here for using modern clubs. Just because we all love classics, and most of us play them regularly doesn't mean we judge others. In this forum, we seem to draw strength from what we share in common - very rarely do we let what we differ on cause us to ostracize another member. Speaking for myself, I wish I was actually good enough to play some mini tours. Heck, last year I got my first big payday by winning the second flight in an Open tournament ($140!) playing my "gasp" Ping Eye2s. If I could somehow make golf self-funding, it would be awesome. All I can wish you is the best of luck in your quest to make a little scratch playing the game we all enjoy. Worst case scenario, you go back to the beach, and golf for fun again.

But from yourself, Randy, and K-D, it sounds as if we all get the golf blues at some time. I guess the important thing is if we can isolate why we get these blues, we can then take action to get rid of them.

Me, I think instead of planning any golf this weekend, I will instead work on my boat. Maybe I'll stay away from the course until league next week. And maybe I'll try and plan a few rounds with some friends for some different courses at some point this summer.

[oldschoolrocker]

As usual a very soul searching discovery type post Scott. You may very well have hammered the nail with your observation. I too live within a stones throw of our local muni, so that factored in along with the other variables makes it a prudent choice for most of my rounds. However, that said, I do try and get in at least two rounds a month on other courses on the area. My favorite being the only thing close to a links course we have. Two tout themselves with "links" in the name, but I am fond of only one.
Have played my best golf on that one over the years and is where I take my wife's British cousins when they Sally over from across the pond.
Went to the muni range this morning on a lark after thinking "minimalist " and put together a partial set of 30ish faux shafted irons and putter. 3 punched face and 3 grooved. Had the George Sayer wood that I found a few months ago as well.
As hot and humid as yesterday was today was as dismal and dreary, to the masses at least. The lingering hint of Lowcountry fog, along with the steady coolness provided by a constant light rain seemed to invigorate my senses.
I am sure I was a sight with my shorts topped off by a woolen sweater and felt fedora. But, I regress, back to the topic at hand.
As I was going through the bag I thought how splendid it would be to play the. "Links " course with this setup. Now, the problem would lie in the 3 pars and being able to carry one over water without completely defeating the purpose of the challenge and resorting to the senior tees.
Have a 2 iron in the mix. Put it on a tee and see what happens. As luck and the golfing gods would have it, it will more that suffice for the shorter 4 pars and the one long. 3 par carry.
So, next week my goal is to take this minimalist set to the "links" grounds and give them a whirl. Just the thought of it sparks my interest, so
Perhaps this new approach that you have chosen will rekindle your desire with the game.
Good luck and as always,
"Keep us posted."

[ScooterMcTavish]

Thanks Randy,

After my 9 holes last night (and it was perfect as the course was deserted), I am narrowing this down even further.

Yes, there is a certain level of boredom with the course. However, I think I had also hit a certain level of boredom with my game.

Unfortunately, as we age, we must be realistic in our approach towards golf. We only have so much time to practice and play, which means we will likely never rise above a general malaise in our games. Sure, we will have brilliant rounds where every shot works out, and we get pumped and excited. We also have disaster rounds, where everything goes wrong, and we find other things to enjoy about our time on the course, like birds and the smell of fresh cut grass. And in between these extremes is our "normal" round, where we make the odd double and birdie, and turn birdies into pars and pars into bogies. We may hit good drives, but nothing notably long, or notably straight. And our reads all end up either above or below the hole. These rounds, the bulk of our golfing existence may make us ask the question "Is this is good as I really am", or even more disturbingly "Is this as good as I'll ever get?"

The sad part is when we have the solid round (I think of my 8 par 1 bogie spectacular earlier this year), we think we may have turned a corner, and something has "clicked" - it's not the score, but the feeling that one has gotten close to some mastery of the game. Then the golf Gods taser us with reality. I believe this 36 was followed by a scrambly, ugly 44, and the 44 was a lucky 44. Confidence? Shot. Feeling I was approaching some control of the game? Gone.

But I appreciate the post H-C put in the "Rounds With a Vintage Bag" topic - he set himself a goal, to hit par with his classic set. To me, this distills down even further - it is not about the score, it is about hitting every club in your bag as well as you can, making correct decisions on the course, and proving that vintage gear works as well as new stuff. If you can do this, the score takes care of itself. The score is the measure, not the goal of playing vintage equipment. Unfortunately, as much as we may have hit out shots sweetly, this measure may not measure up like we feel it should.

I think the boredom with the home course is less boredom, and more frustration with the fact it keeps holding a mirror up to me - a mirror that highlights that no matter how I may have made a shot in the past, I can always find a way to mess it up today. It reflects that although my putting had improved last year, this blessing can be taken away as quickly as it is bestowed. And as much as I may feel I have improved, and as much as I can now hit a teeny-tiny baby fade with my irons, the objective measurement tells me I haven't gotten any better at all.

If I play on a new or different course, I have low and reasonable expectations. When I play on my home course, I have different expectations.....unfortunately, these expectations look like something that I may never meet. Despite playing vintage, and becoming a better ball striker and worker of the ball, I just cannot be "perfect" enough in my game to meet these expectations. And my home course cruelly taunts and mocks me for it.

Also like H-C, I have been on the cusp of my expectations so many times, only to have them dashed by something which seemed unfair or providential.

So it is not the course I am bored with - it is the frustration that my home course generates. I feel I'm improving my game, yet not seeing this improvement in the only objective measure we have - score. And knowing my course as well as I do, and knowing what I can do on every hole on the course (all have been birdied, two have been eagled), I am automatically set up for disappointment and frustration every time I go out. And that feeling my friends, will make you lose your mojo.

[Kirasdad]

Well said. Frankly, that's what hickory has done for me. The expectation part of golf is gone. If I have a less than stellar day, well..."the game is hard and I'm using 90 year old clubs!" If I have a great day it's..."Wow, I must really be a playah cause look how well I played with 90 year old clubs!" There are lots of benefits to the hickory game, but healthy expectations are a major factor, in my conversion anyway, and I think many of the guys I've played in hickory events with over the last four years share that sentiment.

[birly-shirly]

Anyone losing their mojo needs to come and play my course.

Last night was a beautiful summer's evening, and it's light here 'til almost 10pm. I picked up my kids from school, prepared dinner, got everyone fed and then went out to the course sometime after 7 thinking "half an hour of putting, and then a leisurely 9 holes with the course to myself."

Only to be met by an intransigent, blustering Director of Golf. "The course is closed." he said. "The course closes at 7pm".

"And, since I'm a member here and have paid for "unlimited golf" for the year - what harm/loss/mischief would it do if I went out right now for 9 holes?"

"That would be breaking the rules" comes the answer.

"And what's the purpose of that rule?"

"I'm not prepared to discuss that."

Believe me...if complacency is starting to creep into your golfing, try having some officious jobsworth take it away from you on a perfect summer's evening.

[ScooterMcTavish]

Wow.

Is 7-10 reserved for a nude swingers golf party? Of which your Director of Golf is a member?

Could really breathe some life into those golf double-entendres we are all so fond of.

[BIG STU]

Scooter I can relate to being bored with a course. When we had the old golf shop group we sorta got into a rut because we played the same course every Sunday for a year and a half. Nothing paticularly wrong with the course just got burned out on it so to speak. the little executive course up the street I got bored with it untill I started playing vintage. Usually when I play it I take my 40s model Armours to play it and that makes it challenging. My home course around the corner is a great course but sometimes I get bored playing the modern gamers. I will probably play tomorrow and play vintage since they just punched the greens Thursday. i did play my minimulist bag last Sunday and walked 9 holes. I did your setup except with MacGregor irons instead of Wilsons Carried an old Power Bilt driver and 5 wood putted with an old IM5 Mac putter. Played from the senior tees since I dont hit persimmon about 225 or so any more. Par 36 shot 40 on crappy greens but it was peaceful and fun. I did go down the road and played Thursday on another course with my modern clubs with a lifelong friend of mine and had fun

[BIG STU]

[quote name='birly-shirly' timestamp='1402591898' post='9480959']
Anyone losing their mojo needs to come and play my course.

Last night was a beautiful summer's evening, and it's light here 'til almost 10pm. I picked up my kids from school, prepared dinner, got everyone fed and then went out to the course sometime after 7 thinking "half an hour of putting, and then a leisurely 9 holes with the course to myself."

Only to be met by an intransigent, blustering Director of Golf. "The course is closed." he said. "The course closes at 7pm".

"And, since I'm a member here and have paid for "unlimited golf" for the year - what harm/loss/mischief would it do if I went out right now for 9 holes?"

"That would be breaking the rules" comes the answer.

"And what's the purpose of that rule?"

"I'm not prepared to discuss that."

Believe me...if complacency is starting to creep into your golfing, try having some officious jobsworth take it away from you on a perfect summer's evening.
[/quote]Oh what an arrogant arse! Does he not realize that the members like you help pay his wages? I guess they did not teach him that at his PGM/PGA school

[Blade Junkie]

[quote name='birly-shirly' timestamp='1402591898' post='9480959']
Believe me...if complacency is starting to creep into your golfing, try having some officious jobsworth take it away from you on a perfect summer's evening.
[/quote]

We have the same problem but early in the morning .. no golf before 07h30.

It is light at 4am at the moment, and I'd love to get 18 holes in before work, but heaven help anyone that has tried to flaunt that little rule.

"The groundstaff need that time to prepare the course" is the stock answer ... which is fine by me, but I'm not exactly going to get in their way or stop them doing that, and I certainly wouldn't be hitting any golf balls anywhere near where they were working ...

[birly-shirly]

Hmm. At least you've been given a reason of some sort. I understand the problems that would arise if busloads of parties were turning up to play at 6am - but you'd like to think there would be a way of letting the odd solo get some golf in, even if it means skipping holes where someone is working.

Maybe there's some compromise you could reach. I do now have permission to tee it up after 7pm - so anything is possible!

[That Bob Guy]

Boy, is it ever strange to run across this post, as I too struggle with my desire to play the game I truly love.

[Ironmaster Oddities]

Back in the day, after most golfers had gone home, we used to play cross country golf to break the boredom barrier. #1 tee to either 7, 11, or 16 green. 12 tee to 14 green ( a ball-buster par 6, by the way.). Then from 15 tee, clear out in the north west part of the course, all the way back to #9 green, in the southeastern corner. Plus any of a dozen variables on that theme. Gave us opportunities to hit different shots and be inventive. You would call what your next shot would be. The more outrageous the better. And it gave us more chances to gamble. Not just for 50 cents or a buck. But gamble on whether or not you could pull off your called shot.

[ScooterMcTavish]

Bob, I love that idea, and immediately see the fun appeal of that.

Just thought I'd give an update as my mojo and I have not been around all that much. Been pretty busy on the life front, meaning I have put up only 27 holes in the last month - a sin for our diabolically short golf seasons here. Life has been the priority over golf (as it sometimes should be).

So I think it is somewhat apparent that my mojo is not back. In a lifestyle decision, I have sworn off my long time friend, alcohol (mainly manifested as beer and single malt) - for me, as an adult, alcohol had become an integral part of the game, especially when out with friends. In other words, the "party" atmosphere that seems to be creeping up on golf had snuck into my game, and only being sober did I realize this. So this has taken away one element of my "mojo", though I do enjoy golf in more than one context.

18 of my 27 holes were at one of the most beautiful golf courses in our province. Although I enjoyed the round, I did not hear Handel's Messiah chorus while the heavens opened, and cherubim and seraphim looked down on me in joy. It was a round of golf on a very long course. That was about it.

And as our life has gotten busy with some other life changes (purchasing additional property, pursuing more family activities with the kids out of school), I am not golfing much. More disturbingly, I don't really seem to care.

Rewind about 1 year ago, and I was so pumped about trying to recapture some of the "golf wonder" of my youth, as documented in the set for all seasons thread. Based on where I am right now, it is going to take more than a set for all seasons. There is still something I'm missing here, and I can't put my finger on it.

[VivaTerlingua]

Man, this is a tough one. I wish I knew the answer, but I don't. I do know, however, that I used to play a lot. From age 6 to 36. Then a job took me to New Mexico where there were trout streams everywhere, golf courses no where near. So I fly fished. Seriously fly fished. Job brought me back home to Texas, where trout streams are found.........in New Mexico. So I picked up golf again. And found Golfwrx. And really enjoying it, for sure.

Son is in college, daughter in High School. I've tried to get both interested in fly fishing, and then in Golf. Son is kind of playing a little now with me when he is home. Daughter not so much. The kind of person I am - I put together a "golfwrx" bag for her, complete with custom wedges and custom putter. Because that's what I would have wanted.

I've rambled, and I apologize. I guess long-story short - I have been selfish. I enjoyed fly fishing, so the kids should enjoy it. I enjoy playing golf, so the kids should have the same enthusiasm I have. I thought they should mold their wants around mine.

I'm finding my joy now coming from seeing my kids enjoy (not excel) what they enjoy. And (gasp) it's not what I enjoy/enjoyed when I was their age. Learning to be unselfish was/is hard, but it's getting easier. My bible speaks in numerous places about being humble, or putting others interests in front of yours. I just haven't listened. And what do you know - the more I listen and put others interests in front of mine, the happier I am. The more places joy awaits me.

Scooter- I don't imply that you don't, please don't misunderstand me. I'm just reflecting on MY situation, and putting it out there what's helped me.

Now, i am not saying I gave up on fly-fishing. I haven't. I'm not saying I will give up on playing golf. I haven't. I guess I'm just saying that playing golf is on my "to-do" list each week, but it's way behind taking an interest in and encouraging my kids, asking them questions, spending time with them. Enjoying what they enjoy, not what I enjoy. Trying to be more selfless and less selfish. Not only with my family, but others.

Golf can be a selfish game. It made me selfish with my time, selfish with my income, selfish with ______. It's a fine line that I walk, because I do enjoy it. I can also say my joy and peace after puring a forged iron can't start the joy I get when I see my kids enjoying something. Or getting better at what they like to do.

I need to do better with my wife. A LOT better.........

I enjoy playing golf. I find joy in it. But trying to find true joy in it, well....I don't think it can be done. And I don't want to look in the wrong place for it.

Again - I'm not implying that you're guilty of the same things I am. I just wanted to come clean, too. Thanks for the topic. And good luck, I hope you find it again!

[VivaTerlingua]

Wow, just noticed the date. I apologize for the thread bump!

[BIG STU]

[quote name='dtrayler' timestamp='1433277348' post='11676904']
Wow, just noticed the date. I apologize for the thread bump!
[/quote]Nothing at all wrong with the thread bump. Sometimes it is good to revive an old thread and my Bible says the same thing yours does

[ScooterMcTavish]

No problem dtrayler, as questions that wax philosophical about the game we all share are never stale-dated. Not to say this should be a sticky or anything, but the discussion is always current.

Actually a good time to maybe mention that I do have my mojo back, though it is a little less "driven" mojo than I previously had.

Before, I was in a tizzy to get out and break par. I played round after round on the same course, as this was going to be my best opportunity to break par. I drank too much, and lugged my fat a** around in a power cart.

But now, instead, I'm actually trying to live the qualities I have espoused elsewhere in the forum. I am golfing less, I am golfing on more courses, and I am embracing the history and feel of the equipment I'm playing with. Instead of looking at my score, I am cycling through my various sets and trying them for all their good and bad, and am enjoying the challenge this presents. I am now walking the course, drinking water, and enjoying the sun. I am giving away clubs, and rejoice when I hear of their happiness in their new home.

The driving range has become more important, and I now look forward to range sessions, working on both a draw and a fade, and feeling the solid smack of the persimmons, and the effortless feel a well struck iron shot has. I've enjoyed learning more about my swing, and what ball positions work when I'm cold, loosening, and warm. I'm taking these lessons to the course, and am making my play more purposeful. It's not about the shot - it's about if I executed the shot I sought. And the score is the score, and I don't really care.

I'm also learning more about me. Exercise has become a regular thing, and I look for reasons to walk instead of drive. Taking the time to relax and enjoy the round has become more important, and I don't worry about playing as fast as I can to get home. Each round is a treat, and I enjoy it as such. Best part, the family doesn't mind, as I'm going less, and not drinking, two things that make everyone happy.

However, I think that we can even strip away a lot of the preceding, and distill getting the mojo back to a couple of simple changes

- Taking your time to enjoy the round (which also means walking, not riding)
- Golfing less often so you have no guilt with taking the time to enjoy the round
- Moving to at least a 1:1 practice to golf ratio - this way your rounds feel like rounds, not practice

[VivaTerlingua]

Very well said, Scooter. Thanks. I will try to add your 1:1 practice to golf ratio (the other two are already in place), that makes sense.

I find myself approaching golf the same way I approach fly fishing now. I'm not fishing to set a personal record, fish longer, or catch more or bigger anymore. I'm just fishing, enjoying the things that "go with it". Like being outside. In beautiful scenery. Enjoying creation. And that moment that I make the perfect cast, exactly when and where I want it - it matters not whether a fish strikes. I still remember those casts.

I'm finding the same approach working for me on the course. I still remember those shots.

[i]Sometimes[/i] being old isn't that bad.

[Kirasdad]

Well said. As a semi Buddhist I have learned that the middle path is the one to walk, and that means usually not having to force things. My daughter (11) goes with me to the course about twice a month. She has three clubs plus a putter. She will hit ten to fifteen shots per round. She enjoys it, but I think really she just likes hanging out with me and vice versa. As she gets older and stronger I will probably up the ante a little, get her an 8 club "set" and work with her a little. If she takes to it, great, if not, we'll go back to what we do now, which is just fine with me.

My golf life has completely changed in the last few years.

Five years ago
1. I almost quit
2. Started playing hickory
3. Stopped playing on weekend mornings (except for the odd tournament) and had 6/10 more hours of family time.

Two years ago
1. Stopped buying lots of clubs
2. Started playing more and more hickory

One year ago
I hurt myself and couldn't play for 4 months and could barely play for 4 months after that.

Now
1. Health returned two months ago. I am 100%. And grateful for it.
2. Playing almost exclusively hickory.
3. Learning about old clubs and how to work on them
4. Picking my spots (Mid Pines, for instance) and enjoying it more than ever.

Scott, I loved reading your latest. I remember when I first got on this forum and read your erudite and witty posts with great interest. At the same time I felt like you were chasing something that I wasn't sure you were going to find. You seem to have emerged from that search a more something...um settled, maybe, or peaceful guy, perhaps?

Pardon my Freud.

Thanks for the bump dt. There is no such thing as a dead thread around here. Great posts.

[ScooterMcTavish]

Appreciate the kind words K-D, though you have now piqued my curiosity as to how one defines a "semi-Buddhist". Mind you, I guess I'm sort of a semi-Christian so I'm guessing it's rather similar but with Karma.

I think golf, more than any other sport, reflects the person who plays it. When we are in turmoil, we seek solace in the game. But the game instead becomes a manifestation of this turmoil, seen in chasing score, obsession over gear, or practice to the point of injury.

But when we are at peace, our game is at peace.

[Kirasdad]

+1 big time.