New Wise Ass material

Ok Guys and Gals. I need to new material to say to my golfing buddies when they boot a shot. Like, after leaving a putt too short for a gimme: "There's pizza left in the box." etc. Any comments are good, about any poor shot. Thanks.

"Man, you really %^$#ing suck."

> @chinaski said:

> "Man, you really %^$#ing suck."

Hey, no need to beat about the bush!

My favorite, though you've got to be careful who you say it in front of. For a putt left well short of the hole: "Next time, tuck your labia away before you putt."

You stink at golf...

Hardly new, but often used when leaving a lag putt short: FISM -- f***, it's still me!

A popped up tee shot is an elephant's arse -- sky high and not worth a s***!

Your wife told me you were terrible at golf but you're way worse

Most people miss 100% of the shots they don't take, but you miss 100% of those you do

You didn't just fall out of the crummy golfer tree, but you got dragged through every branch of the you suck at golf forest

I don't think you suck, maybe it's just that you have bad luck every time you step on the course

It's ok to suck every once in a while, but don't you think you're overdoing it?

You do know it's ok to make a putt longer than 4 feet, right?

Well that sucked with a capital S and a lot of U's

I know don't what makes you so bad at golf, but it's working

have you ever thought that you may actually be left handed?

You better hope that Trump doesn't start deporting lousy putters because you'd be the first to go....

If you're a coach or picked someone for your team.... Did I seem wasted when I picked this team? (Wait for no) Ok, just wondering how I ended up with you

So basically all of these are ripped off from the hilarious videos of a kid's baseball coach making fun of his pitchers and adapted for golf. If you have some spare time these are gold.....

Awesome, thanks!

Cha Ching!

And here in this day and age of political correctness and awards for participating that those sorts of beat downs were long gone. That was like a blast from the past of when I played little league baseball! Ya, you guessed it: I too fell out of the you suck at baseball treee and hit every branch on the way down! :lol: Now you know why I'm sooooo good at golf! :lol:

One of my personal favorites....after a drive

"Ive noticed that you are standing too close to the ball?

"Really?"

"Yes, when it lands"

You have a great swing...for a bowler.

If they leave a putt short, tell them "That was a good decision to lay up from there. From that lie? Smart golf."