The Ettiquette of Flying Solo

[Well Played]

Three-part Question

So I've been heading out to the course myself quite a bit lately and am curious to hear feedback with regards to etiquette. The following are three questions I think about when joining a group as a single:

1) Is it often frowned upon to go out as a single early on a weekend morning, when obviously most golf clubs will throw you into the first available threesome? I went to one of my local courses yesterday morning looking to play. This particular club has permanent tee times. I was at the practice tee waiting for a spot when I was called to the first tee. Upon approaching the tee box, I find a group of three guys literally berating the ranger because they don't want anyone to join their group. Apparently their fourth had to bail out last second and they couldn't find anyone to replace him. The ranger was polite to me and calmly explained to them that since they have an opening it is at the discretion of the club to fill the open spot. The guys just kept going on and on about how it was their permanent tee time and they don't want to be placed with a stranger, yada yada yada. I told the ranger no worries, I'll wait for the next spot. Now, I can kind of see their point - permanent tee time, usually the same group of guys, it's their one time a week to get away from the wife and kids, etc - but part of me also thinks it's rather ridiculous. Your thoughts? Are there any unwritten rules about this? One of the biggest reasons I ask is due to my schedule these days the weekend mornings are often the best times for me to play.

2) As the single is it OK to play the tips when everyone else is playing up at least one tee, if not more?

3) As the single is it rude to walk if the other three are riding, or vice versa?

Important to note: I'm a 6 handicap who is generally well versed in etiquette and the rules of golf, and will never inconvenience a group with slow play.

[Cameron Carter]

It seems they should allow you to play with them it is just part of the gamer meeting new people and playing with them.

 

As for playing the tips with them it seems reasonable if you aren't holding up play. Question number three about riding is kind of difficult, it seems you should ask the other three what they would prefer as they are the ones who actually made the tee time.

[KevCarter]

So I've been heading out to the course myself quite a bit lately and am curious to hear feedback with regards to etiquette. The following are three questions I think about when joining a group as a single:

 

1) Is it often frowned upon to go out as a single early on a weekend morning, when obviously most golf clubs will throw you into the first available threesome? I went to one of my local courses yesterday morning looking to play. This particular club has permanent tee times. I was at the practice tee waiting for a spot when I was called to the first tee. Upon approaching the tee box, I find a group of three guys literally berating the ranger because they don't want anyone to join their group. Apparently their fourth had to bail out last second and they couldn't find anyone to replace him. The ranger was polite to me and calmly explained to them that since they have an opening it is at the discretion of the club to fill the open spot. The guys just kept going on and on about how it was their permanent tee time and they don't want to be placed with a stranger, yada yada yada. I told the ranger no worries, I'll wait for the next spot. Now, I can kind of see their point - permanent tee time, usually the same group of guys, it's their one time a week to get away from the wife and kids, etc - but part of me also thinks it's rather ridiculous. Your thoughts? Are there any unwritten rules about this? One of the biggest reasons I ask is due to my schedule these days the weekend mornings are often the best times for me to play.

 

2) As the single is it OK to play the tips when everyone else is playing up at least one tee, if not more?

 

3) As the single is it rude to walk if the other three are riding, or vice versa?

 

Important to note: I'm a 6 handicap who is generally well versed in etiquette and the rules of golf, and will never inconvenience a group with slow play.

 

 

1) Their loss

2) I believe you should play from the same tees, just from a socializing standpoint

3) Walking fine, as long as you are comfortable trying to keep up with the carts. Judgement call.

 

I think the group was VERY inconsiderate.

 

Kevin

[Naffiliate]

couple of thoughts....

 

If you're invited in, go for it.. these guys had a problem- these jackholes are going to complain for the next 5 hours- make you miserable and you too..

 

Man, playing the back tees (or further back) maybe look at it like playing with women.. they are always (usually) going to be on the red- so you're going first..

 

so, not only are you going first.. they are in carts 100 yds ahead of you walking - and waiting for you to tee off first... every hole... I'd play with them (from what ever tee they play) won't kill you or them..

 

Cart- vs walking-- if you're a 6H- you're playing fairways and greens.. again-- they may be 100-200 yards ahead of you (maybe...) but you could be watching them play army golf (left, right, left, right..) and be on the green sooner..

 

Tough call... but etiquette... really depends on the attitude of the 3 - a world of difference - if they welcome you...

[JeffreySpicoli]

According to etiquette ("rules governing socially acceptable behavior"), my answers would be:

 

1. No, it's not frowned upon for singles to look to join up with other groups at busy times. Though don't be surprised if, as you've noted, some groups don't want you.

 

2. Play from the tips if you want to.

 

3. Walk if you want to.

 

According to politeness, ("showing regard for others in manners, speech, behavior, etc."), my answers would be:

 

1. Don't be surprised if some weekend morning groups aren't excited to have you join them.

 

2. Play the same tees as the rest of group, whenever possible.

 

3. If they ride and you walk, make damn sure you don't slow them down.

[Johnny]

I would have told the 3 too...pay for the fourth spot then, or find a new permanent tee time somewhere else. etc. I would have done the same as you though, not wanting to play with those guys and wait for the next spot.

 

2) play the same tees to speed things up

3) keep pace if you are walking

 

I was a single the other week off the tips, when I caught a 3some they asked me to join and I played the remaining holes from the whites (2 tees up). No biggie atleast they were cool.

[klaymon]

1) No real feelings on that.

2) I would probably play the same tees.

3) I walk. Period. By the time, most people are done driving back and forth between balls and just being generally inefficient with a cart (90 degrees off path, cart path only, etc), I will have walked to my ball and I will be ready to play. I played a round not long ago where the other 3 rode and I walked. I had no trouble keeping up.

[Well Played]

I was a single the other week off the tips, when I caught a 3some they asked me to join and I played the remaining holes from the whites (2 tees up). No biggie atleast they were cool.

 

 

Yeah, I agree this is probably the appropriate thing to do.

 

Also, for the record, I've been playing golf for a long time and do this quite often. Only after yesterday's episode have I started to think, "Well, maybe it is kind of rude to impose on a group's planned, weekly outing?"

 

Bottom line is I love to play golf and will simply play with whomever. Most groups are generally very receptive. I just am curious if there are a lot of people out there who are not...

[arbitrage]

I play solo all the time, so:

 

 

1) I play with whatever group the clubhouse pairs me with.

2) I always play the same tees as the group I'm joining.

3) I always walk. I always play ready golf. Unless it's 99* in the shade, I am usually waiting on the other guys (I am usually longer then my playing partners).

[jones137]

1.) You should absolutely be allowed, and not feel bad, to pair up early on the weekends. Good golfers won't mind but most bad golfers will not want to be paired up......they're embarrassed of their game and the added pressure of playing with somebody different could make their game even worse.

 

2.) Play from the same set of tees. Keeps the pace going and everybody close together on the course.

 

3.) At a 6 hdcp you'll out pace most folks that are riding. I say definitely walk.

[Feddyvon]

While I lived in Dallas, we played a lot as either 2-somes or 3-somes, so we were paired with lots of different people. What I learned then, and have tried to carry forward is that it's most courteous to try and adapt to the style of play of the people you're being matched with. We always played whites, and had a couple singles insist on the blues and kind of mock us for not joining him. We had another who decided to try and give lessons the whole way, which was not appreciated at all. We were playing a casual game, laying it up, and not hitting from under trees and what-not, and a single accosted us for not following the rules to the tee. Money was not on the line, and his input was not needed.

 

I think it's fine to play as a single, I like to from time to time to meet new people, but I think it's a good rule of thumb to never impose your play on the rest of the group. You wouldn't insist on bringing a meat dish to a vegetarian party, so don't make people fit into your standards on the golf course.

 

It sounds as though you were completely in-line, and these guys were beyond rude on the course.

[c010r4d0g01f3r]

1) I can understand their feelings. (No offense) When I first started playing, I HATED getting paired up with anyone I didnt know because it would just make me feel more pressure, both to play well and not to hold them up.

2) I would say same tees as everyone else unless you are trying to practice for a tournament or something.

3) Walk. End of Story.

[One_Putt_Blunder]

Very interesting topic!!

I have a bit of a non stantard schedule since I have sunday and mondays off, normaly if I am playing with my usual buddies we go out on sundays and usually have 4,however on the times we have 3 we will almost always get the get paired up with the single. While 85% off the time we get paired up with a single and they are polite/enjoyable/fun to play. The downside is we get hit with "that guy 15% of the time and by "that guy I mean the guy who tells my buddies they should invest in leasons, and gives unsolicited advice. Now while I find this absolutley hilarious my playing partners are not too amused by the stranger clowning on their lack of game. Just a hint If I am beating you by 4 shots a side I really dont want your unsolicited advice

 

On the flipside to this I play on mondays as a single and usually am paired up with a 3 some. When I play as a single I find it best make my introductions, play my normal game and try not to intrude on their group, until they bring me into the conversation. Now normaly I will play the tees that they are playing unless it is just way to short, but I will always ask if they mind that I play farther back from them.

[golfortennis]

My attitude would be that if these guys wanted their game preserved, their fourth should have shown up. Having said that, you spared yourself 4-5 hours of playing with complete and utter a%^holes. On the one hand if they really get their knickers in a knot over a new guy, it would have been nice to see them squirm for 18 holes, but frankly, it wouldn't have been worth it. That was a great point the other poster made about good golfers willing to accept and bad golfers not wanting someone.

 

I don't know about the tees, I get paired up at this one course, and I end up playing a set of tees back, and other than the fact I'm always first, which sometimes leads to a bit of a rush, it's not bad. I walk wherever allowed, like others have said, there is no problem keeping up with a cart unless they are single digits themselves.

 

I usually go very early in the morning to try to avoid that situation, and normally get away ok. Whatever you do, don't impose ruels on them. If they ask, you can tell them. they always ask me why I do certain things(re-tee, etc.), and I tell them. I leave it at that, and alot of times they end up doing the same. But I wouldn't tell they need to do that.

 

Whatever you do, don't stop going out as a single if that's how you are able to get out there. If the golf course won't accommodate you, then tell the rest of us so we avoid that place. A lot of us go out by ourselves, we need to know where we can get on.

[Brad31]

1- Take whoever they give you

 

2- Play the same tees as them. Unless you are getting ready for a tournament or something. Or lets say for 2-3 holes the back tees really give you a shot you wanna try into a par 3 or make you drive a certain way that you wanna work on etc, then ask to play tyhe back tees for those certain holes. But if you or them or playing serious this tee jumping might not be appreciated. Check with them

 

3-Walk or ride its up to you

[stage1350]

My local muni is very similar. Some people think they own the course and deserve special treatment. If the first group didn't want a fourth to join, they should have paid an additional green fee for the spot. You probably didn't want to hangout with a bunch of crabasses anyway, so get into the group behind them and hit into them all day.

 

I'll usually move up to whatever the group is playing if I'm joining up. Worst case, you'll work on your fairways and irons off the tee. Part of joining a foursome is the social aspect and I'd rather play from the same tee than be an outcast. I'll go back to the tips if one of them wants to join me, however.

 

Unless you can't keep pace with the riders, walking shouldn't be an issue.

[toofless]

I feel your pain.

I play at least once a week and I don't have any golf buddies. I play by myself ALL THE TIME. So I'm used to getting mixed in with 3 guys who were hoping to play as just a 3 some... If they resent your presence, F them! You have as much right to that tee time as they...

 

Play from the tips, just don't sky it or shank it. Doing that from the blacks is the most embarassing. :swoon2:

 

I think THEY should apologize to you for riding in a cart. Golf was meant to be walked...

[Diesel]

i wouldn't want to play in a group that didn't want me... i would have waited like you did for the next open spot...

 

you should play the same tee, so you don't make it like you're special... i've often moved up to the front tees when i join a group that plays from them... no big deal, and i usally score better cause it's less times i have to hit my driver...

 

if you want to walk, walk... if you're a 6, it's not like you will be holding up play...

[skizix]

I play as a single plenty. I almost always walk (only exception: when I'm with friends who definitely are riding, I'll ride too).

 

All issues well-covered here, but I will add: usually nothing wrong with walking while others in your group ride. I find it usually, curiously, does not hold up play at all (since riders have to go from one ball to the next, I guess). However, on certain courses, holes are not set up well for this (thinking of Legacy Ridge, north of Denver). I and a friend walked there, while a twosome we were paired with rode. Distance from each green to the next tee is unusually huge, and...I did feel like we kept them waiting a bit.

 

So on certain courses, it may not be completely cool to be the only walker.

 

Exceedingly lame of those guys to cry about getting paired -- part of the game, period.

[BILL12x]

Lots of good advice above, but I'll add one thing: If I want to play the tips, sometimes the people I get paired with will say, "OK, I'll play the tips with you!"

 

Trust me, if you have three 20+ handicappers playing the tips with you, it will be a long round. (Nothing against 20+ handicappers, it's just a fact of life). Play whatever tees they're playing. Hit 3wood or 3 iron on holes you'd use driver from the tips, so you can have the same approach distances.

 

I'll play with anyone: man, woman, child or elder of any handicap and have a good time if you're a good person. A few weeks ago, my plans changed and I ended up playing with three 80+ year old women and had a great time! They were really a kick to be around and were very quick players, even with their 30+ handicaps. We played in less than 4 hours and waited quite a bit.

 

I will even find a way to enjoy playing with 3 grumps like you mentioned didn't want you in their group.

[777twist]

I play by myself all the time now... I like playing alone better at this time. I can kind of go Zen and not worry about other people or their shots.

 

However, if someone asks me to join them or if they can join me, I normally say yes. Even though, I would rather not.

 

I normally play twilight, cheaper and not as many people out.

 

Like today, a guy joined me on hole two but quit at hole 5 because of lightning... The course rang the bell, but I always keep playing. I love it when the course is empty!!! And rain doesn't bother me. Granted, getting struck will bother me (if I live) but I think only one person has died in 10 years, I don't think I'm that lucky!

 

 

As for the topic, I think the club should be able to fillout a foursome any time they want. If the group doesn't want the addition, they should have to pay for the slots. These courses are out to make money, are they not?

[One_Putt_Blunder]

I dont think the hard stuff is going to come down for a while^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

[ballzo]

1) Is it often frowned upon to go out as a single early on a weekend morning, when obviously most golf clubs will throw you into the first available threesome? I went to one of my local courses yesterday morning looking to play. This particular club has permanent tee times. I was at the practice tee waiting for a spot when I was called to the first tee. Upon approaching the tee box, I find a group of three guys literally berating the ranger because they don't want anyone to join their group. Apparently their fourth had to bail out last second and they couldn't find anyone to replace him. The ranger was polite to me and calmly explained to them that since they have an opening it is at the discretion of the club to fill the open spot. The guys just kept going on and on about how it was their permanent tee time and they don't want to be placed with a stranger, yada yada yada. I told the ranger no worries, I'll wait for the next spot. Now, I can kind of see their point - permanent tee time, usually the same group of guys, it's their one time a week to get away from the wife and kids, etc - but part of me also thinks it's rather ridiculous. Your thoughts? Are there any unwritten rules about this? One of the biggest reasons I ask is due to my schedule these days the weekend mornings are often the best times for me to play.

 

2) As the single is it OK to play the tips when everyone else is playing up at least one tee, if not more?

 

3) As the single is it rude to walk if the other three are riding, or vice versa?

 

1. I'm a 7 hdcp and I play alot of golf as a single. Mostly late afternoon rounds cause I'm cheap but occasionally I will play an early morning round and expect to be stuck into some sort of new 3 some or 2 some. I usually enjoy meeting new golfers and playing a round with them. Occasionally I get stuck with someone that is just not enjoyable for me and I deal with that. I look as that a new challenge of the game just like chipping and putting. It takes practice to deal with personalities and still maintain your game focus. As far as that 3 some that didn't want to play with you, I bet they were so bad that they hate to be paired with anyone else because they are so and embarrassed with the way they play!

 

2. I play what ever boxes I play. I hate it when a 20 handicap trys to play where I'm playing and I wouldn't want to do the same to someone that regualrly plays the tips. Just play your own tees.

 

3. If you normally walk, then walk it.

[mrbandit]

I been that single player, many, many times.. usually when I go visit a new course.

 

1. I would have played, the great thing about golf is that you don't need to talk to anyone if you don't want to.. its you and the course!! Those guys probably didn't want someone watching them cheat!!! LOL!

 

2. I played from where ever the group is playing from, makes it fun you don't feel like your showing them up playing from the tips. not that you would.. but some people get sensitive!!

 

3. if you normally walk then walk.. not a big deal, I don't think!!

 

Sometimes you find a good group while as a single and then you become part of that group! That's how I found my current group..

[Godfather]

I often enjoy getting paired with someone or having a single join on. Good call not playing with them.

 

Except with the closest of friends, I play whatever tee the other guys are comfortable with. Sure, I'd prefer to play the tips, but I don't want to be a snob or make someone play the more difficult tees and struggle. Really playing the tee that the worst player is comfortable with is a good idea when paired with strangers.

 

Walk or ride. Whatever... as long as the pace of play doesn't suffer.

[Blues Golfer]

I'm a walk on single more than I play with people I know. Have been for 20 years.

 

1. I would have spoken with the ranger about why they came unglued. It's not a private club, they have no right to the teetime...unless they bribe someone weekly to get it, which is what it sounds like to me. Were they worried you were a hack? Hustler? Slow player?...but if I had really wanted to get started, I'd have ignored them and walked to the tee and got ready to hit.

 

2. What tee to hit from...I choose based on what I want to do that day, not usually what the others are playing. Sometimes I'll join a group at the shorter tees, but if I really was looking forward to a challenge, I'll stay with the plan and play the longer tees. I outdrive most people from the back tees anyway.

 

3. I walk no matter what, mostly because I play better. BUT, I will sometimes toss my bag on the cart, because I can walk faster that way. Or when there is a long walk from green to tee, they usually offer than I jump in to speed up getting to the next tee. I play quickly, so I've never really felt like I am holding anyone up.

 

That said, if I get paired with a single player riding, and the course is open ahead of us, I will go to the cart to take advantage of a faster pace.

[tburchell]

1. I'd feel sorry for the starter, but I would still take the opening, and just keep my mouth shut for the round.

2. I'm going to play my game from the tees I'm comfortable playing. But I do make a point to anyone else to please don't let me pressure them. I might consider moving back to the tips in specific situations if the rest of the group is (I almost always play one up from tips).

3. Ride most of the time, other than the munis, the courses that I play have too much space and elevation change green to next tee to make walking on pace with riding.

[FlyFish]

1) Unless the group was paying for four tee times, they should have let you play. I walk on as a single all the time and I've only once been in a situation once where one of the players was complaining to the marshall. I just ignored them, walked up to the blue tee and piped one down the middle. They didn't say a word about it after that.

 

2) It is common courtesy to play from the same tees.

 

3) Walking or riding doesn't make a difference as long as you keep up the pace.

[jvr1]

i'm curious.. i'm a 12 handicap and for people around my range or higher, is there a difference in etiquette? as in, only take 2min to find your ball before dropping instead of say 5min?

[Well Played]

i'm curious.. i'm a 12 handicap and for people around my range or higher, is there a difference in etiquette? as in, only take 2min to find your ball before dropping instead of say 5min?

 

No, I don't think so. I hear what you're saying, but as a 12 you know what you're doing out on the course and aren't losing too many balls. I'm kind of throwing out an arbitrary number, but I'd say a 20 handicap or higher might try to be a little more conscious of how much time he/she spends during the course of a round looking for golf balls. Per the rules, I believe one is allowed 5 minutes to look for a ball regardless of whether it is the first ball he/she lost or the 8th ball. Obviously at some point etiquette, and common sense, need to be considered. And depending on the round it might not really matter. I mean, if there is nobody behind you and you're playing partners aren't concerned then search til the cows come home... But in general again, as a 12, I wouldn't feel guilty using my 5 minutes to look for my ball.