Unsolicited Advice

[dlygrisse]

I really really hate this

I was at the range one, just killing the ball dead straight, and this guy walks up to me and starts telling me what is wrong with my golf swing. I promise you this guy was not a pro, not as good as me, and had no idea what he was talking about except what he just read in Golf Digest. It really pissed me off!

I am playing golf with these guys the other day, the guys we were playing with seemed pretty cool, and good golfers. I made a tough putt for par on one hole and one of the guys walks up to me on the next tee and says" do you want some advice?" I say "no" He then begins to give me a putting lesson. I'm like you have got to be kidding me!

I know these people are trying to be helpful, but IMO there is not much worse on a golf course than unsolicited advice when you dont want any, especially when it's not coming form a pro. I mean both times I felt my game was in good order and it kind of got into my head. Does anyone else have as big of a problem with this as me?

[jdhallissey]

Haha i hear ya on that one. I will do it to people if we are playing for money. It sometimes fun to see people try and control there emotions. I am a very good player and people tell me that stuff and I laugh and give them some advice back! Give em the old the harder u swing the farther the ball goes! Then they will be done practicing in 20 mins and out of your hair! :drinks:

[dlygrisse]

Haha i hear ya on that one. I will do it to people if we are playing for money. It sometimes fun to see people try and control there emotions. I am a very good player and people tell me that stuff and I laugh and give them some advice back! Give em the old the harder u swing the farther the ball goes! Then they will be done practicing in 20 mins and out of your hair! :drinks:

I hear you, my examples were not gamesmanship, one was just some dude at the range, the other guy I was playing with but not for money. They both actually thought they were trying to be helpful.

 

If my buddies give me advice just to get in my head I dont get mad I just get even, like you said.

[DiscountDansGolf.com]

A little jab early in the conversation usually works well. Something like "The day I want to look or play as poorly as you do, I will come let you know."

 

The thing that strike's me as sad is that the guy was likely a GolfWRX member trying to stretch his wings outside of the computer. Back to your desk chop-donkey where you are a +2 golf instructor.

 

Sorry

[JNewsted]

Geez, I try to be a nice guy and help out and you come on here and string me up!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

:)

 

yeah, it is definitely a touchy subject! Golf is hard and if somebody thinks they can help, a lot of they will say something, even if you're beating them by 5 strokes a side. I dont get it either. When I was learning the game a couple years ago, me and my buddies were all at the same level and would always bring it up if we saw something that was good or bad in our swings. Thats fine! And when I play with my other friends that are college level golfers, I tell them to bring up whatever they see me do. But for unsolicited advice, especially from people that suck at golf.... well thats just fun to read about on the message boards. :drinks:

[ForTourUseOnly]

its liek the old saying goes, "the higher the handicap the more you seem to know about the golf swing"

[Charlie_Foxtrot]

He was hitting on you. The swing advice was just a way to start a conversation.

[ShoxTP]

He was hitting on you. The swing advice was just a way to start a conversation.

 

 

 

 

LMAOnase!

[TheVelvetCat]

I'm not trying to start an issue here -- just curious...

 

Are you a junior golfer? Perhaps these people see what a great talent you are, and can't help but offer you a "tip" to feel as if they're contibuting to your development and a great golf story in the making. Perhaps they can't wait for the day to read about your success in the sports section of the local paper, and say to their friends, "I gave that fine young man a putting tip one afternoon. Looks like it's working." They want you to succeed, and live vicariously through your success. :)

 

On the other hand, if you're an adult, Charlie Foxtrot is probably right.

[br61]

its liek the old saying goes, "the higher the handicap the more you seem to know about the golf swing"

 

Amen, there's couple local guys that's always trying to give me advices and I'd ignore their advices everytime since I"m a selftaught player. After all why should a guy who's handicap is at least 7-10 strokes higher than mine's, be giving me an advice in the first place when they can't do it right themselves?

 

I'm out there playing on the course to enjoy my golf round, not out there to listen to this unnecessary crap.

[TheVelvetCat]

 

I'm out there playing on the course to enjoy my golf round, not out there to listen to this unnecessary crap.

 

Well said. :) Now, if I could only get the voices in my head to shut the .... up, too.

[Charlie_Foxtrot]

 

I'm out there playing on the course to enjoy my golf round, not out there to listen to this unnecessary crap.

 

Well said. :) Now, if I could only get the voices in my head to shut the .... up, too.

 

Amen brotha!

 

I wondered where my voices were vacationing this year. Feel free to keep them for as long as you like.

[yoonie]

I definitely agree about the unsolicited advice- thankfully i've managed to avoid any so far. On the other hand, who hasn't occasionally had the urge to help a struggling slicer with his over the top move (although I resisted the urge)? And regarding the handicaps, even Tiger has a teacher. who just happened to have a near decade long case of full swing driver yips. There's also a story in golf digest somewhere about a tip Ernie Els got from an amateur during a pro-am that helped him regain his chipping stroke (his words, not mine). Just something to consider.

[Geo]

I'm not the playa' that lots of you guys are, but I like working on my own swing. I try not to be snide with the comments, but a "sorry man, i don't think i can afford your help" seems to cover the bases from hacker to pro. Only the most persistent helper gets the follow-up "i'm not talking about money." :)

 

But truth be told, not many people come up offering to help. Wonder if I should stop coordinating my golf clothes. :superman:

 

[NPVWhiz]

I've gotten unsolicited advice on enough occasions that I've gotten past it. A great deal of the golf I've played in the last 10 years has been walk-on, just due to the constraints of family/kids...never sure when I'm going to be able to get out.

 

I've categorized these folks into three groups.

 

1. Lonely old guys. This is the usually 55+ fellow that you can tell is an addict, in his own way, of the game. The pain that he feels when he hits a 40 yard foozler is unbearable. His wife passed away three years ago, and his kids live in Temecula (or somewhere else that's two thousand miles from where you are when he's trying to cure your game). Two of his old golf buddies are sidelined by cancer, and now he plays most of his golf as a walk on as well. His desire to give you advice is a feeble effort to try to find some way of connecting with you, because he laments the lost years and the ravages of old age. He sees what he could have been in you, and he's overwhelmed by the desire to impart to you all that he's learned that he cannot do over his many years on the links.

 

2. Wily old veterans. These are the other 55+ guys that were pretty good players at one point in their career. They don't like being beaten by younger fellas. They're trying to get into your head. You, in a moment of weakness, allow them to, thereby demonstrating that you have a weakness. Chalk one up for the wily vet.

 

3. The sincere student of the game....comes in any age over 30, and fancies himself as knowing a little about instruction. He has his own theories about his own swing that comes from countless hours of watching himself on videotape. He truly does have an idea of why you snaphooked that last one, but we all know it was because the other old fellow in the foursome tried to give you a tip on the last tee.

 

I've learned to smile politely, give them one shot and thank them for their thoughts, then change the subject to what they really want to talk about, which is probably their own game.

[banistr]

Be careful why refusing the guy that comes up and ask "Can I give you a tip?"...last guy that came up to me he was just wanting to tell me about a new internet company that was going public----GOOGLE.

 

And just remembe..some of these guys would just rather try talking to you rather than go home and talk to the wife ... :)

[dlygrisse]

I'm not trying to start an issue here -- just curious...

 

Are you a junior golfer? Perhaps these people see what a great talent you are, and can't help but offer you a "tip" to feel as if they're contibuting to your development and a great golf story in the making. Perhaps they can't wait for the day to read about your success in the sports section of the local paper, and say to their friends, "I gave that fine young man a putting tip one afternoon. Looks like it's working." They want you to succeed, and live vicariously through your success. :)

 

On the other hand, if you're an adult, Charlie Foxtrot is probably right.

LOL, I am 41 years old male, and I have a 6 handicap. These guys were definately not hitting on me, trust me my gay-dar was not going off. They were just idiots who think they know more about the golf swing than they do because they read something in a book or were watching Dean Reinmuth on the golf channel and now they fancy themselves as a golf instructor. Which is fine, if I want your opinion I will ask for it, I will often ask someone I respect what I see with my swing. What pissed me off about these guys was they just walked up to me like they knew my game and started telling me what to do unsolicited.

[dlygrisse]

This may well be one of my biggest pet peeves. I consider it almost the ultimate breach of course etiquette. The advice quite often comes after a not-so-good shot ... but this is exactly when I'm going through my own swing, and diagnosing what I did wrong.

 

IMO, it actually does not matter at all whether someone is much worse, or even better than I am - that's not the issue. Golf (for those that shoot in the 80's and 70's) is as much a mental game as a physical one. The idea that someone would have the balls to introduce their swing thoughts into my game unasked is, to my mind, fully equal to someone slipping their clubs into my bag because they think I should play with different clubs.

 

When I want advice, I'll ask. Most of the time I do not. If it is offered anyway - I have no problem being quite ... harsh, and just nipping it in the bud right away. One or two little comments certainly don't screw my game up ... but I remember a number of years ago a guy that mistook my silence for attention ... and started "helping" me on almost every shot. So at this I just say - right from the beginning - that unasked for advice usually hurts people's game, and is a serious breach of good course manners.

 

And I agree with a couple of others here who have noted that - basically - free advice is worth pretty much what you've paid for it. I have never seen a truly good player, or a PGA teaching pro, offer unsolicited advice on a course.

I think you hit the nail on the head. I myself would never offer advice to someone unless I would really think they want some. In the last couple of years, I have been playing with someone who is trying to learn the game, and as a lower handicap player they have looke to me for help. I make sure I always ask them if they want some advice before I ever give anyone any. I think the big difference between someone who thinks they know a lot about the golf swing and some one who knows how much advice should be given.

[Charlie_Foxtrot]

LOL, I am 41 years old male, and I have a 6 handicap.

 

They were definitely hitting on you.

 

 

. . . my gay-dar was not going off.

 

They must have had a gay-dar jammer.

 

 

 

 

 

(I crack myself up.)

[littlepoison]

I was at the range one, just killing the ball dead straight, and this guy walks up to me and starts telling me what is wrong with my golf swing. I promise you this guy was not a pro, not as good as me, and had no idea what he was talking about except what he just read in Golf Digest. It really pissed me off!

 

I am playing golf with these guys the other day, the guys we were playing with seemed pretty cool, and good golfers. I made a tough putt for par on one hole and one of the guys walks up to me on the next tee and says" do you want some advice?" I say "no" He then begins to give me a putting lesson. I'm like you have got to be kidding me!

 

I know these people are trying to be helpful, but IMO there is not much worse on a golf course than unsolicited advice when you dont want any, especially when it's not coming form a pro. I mean both times I felt my game was in good order and it kind of got into my head. Does anyone else have as big of a problem with this as me?

 

 

Hmmm... sounds suspiciously like "the needle"

 

my .02...

[dlygrisse]

I was at the range one, just killing the ball dead straight, and this guy walks up to me and starts telling me what is wrong with my golf swing. I promise you this guy was not a pro, not as good as me, and had no idea what he was talking about except what he just read in Golf Digest. It really pissed me off!

 

I am playing golf with these guys the other day, the guys we were playing with seemed pretty cool, and good golfers. I made a tough putt for par on one hole and one of the guys walks up to me on the next tee and says" do you want some advice?" I say "no" He then begins to give me a putting lesson. I'm like you have got to be kidding me!

 

I know these people are trying to be helpful, but IMO there is not much worse on a golf course than unsolicited advice when you dont want any, especially when it's not coming form a pro. I mean both times I felt my game was in good order and it kind of got into my head. Does anyone else have as big of a problem with this as me?

 

 

Hmmm... sounds suspiciously like "the needle"

No, that is my point , not a needle, I didnt even know the guys, was not playing for money or even for [pride. These guys were just so eagar to share their wisdom on the golf swing that they had to butt in. If I could add one more comment to this thread, which I started, it would be that I am just trying to point out how rude this behavior is IMO. Mind your own business uness someone asks.

Sure if you are giving your buddies the neede in your weekly match for some money and pride it's all fun and games.

 

my .02...

[jdhallissey]

Next time your out and they want to give you advice turn it onto them. Say hey instead of you giving me a tip how bout I give you a tip. Grab a 6-9 iron and to start your swing kick the shaft with your left foot. Then plant it before your swing gets to the top and strip one done the middle and say that is the american golf swing rite there. I have done that swing on ranges before and actually seen people trying to hit it the same way. :rolleyes: It makes for some good laughs. Normally I let them give me advice and I will say so you mean you want me to swing like this-- Jim Furyk is the swing I always do and turn the toes of my shoes like i was piggeon toed. Then Hit his swing and go ya know that just is not working for me how bout my old swing and crush it down the middle. They get a laugh and kinda just leave you alone.

[Furrankee]

I was at the range one, just killing the ball dead straight, and this guy walks up to me and starts telling me what is wrong with my golf swing. I promise you this guy was not a pro, not as good as me, and had no idea what he was talking about except what he just read in Golf Digest. It really pissed me off!

 

I am playing golf with these guys the other day, the guys we were playing with seemed pretty cool, and good golfers. I made a tough putt for par on one hole and one of the guys walks up to me on the next tee and says" do you want some advice?" I say "no" He then begins to give me a putting lesson. I'm like you have got to be kidding me!

 

I know these people are trying to be helpful, but IMO there is not much worse on a golf course than unsolicited advice when you dont want any, especially when it's not coming form a pro. I mean both times I felt my game was in good order and it kind of got into my head. Does anyone else have as big of a problem with this as me?

 

Put your swing on video and upload it here. Let us all see your swing.

 

A little jab early in the conversation usually works well. Something like "The day I want to look or play as poorly as you do, I will come let you know."

 

The thing that strike's me as sad is that the guy was likely a GolfWRX member trying to stretch his wings outside of the computer. Back to your desk chop-donkey where you are a +2 golf instructor.

 

Sorry

 

Funny

 

I've gotten unsolicited advice on enough occasions that I've gotten past it. A great deal of the golf I've played in the last 10 years has been walk-on, just due to the constraints of family/kids...never sure when I'm going to be able to get out.

 

I've categorized these folks into three groups.

 

1. Lonely old guys. This is the usually 55+ fellow that you can tell is an addict, in his own way, of the game. The pain that he feels when he hits a 40 yard foozler is unbearable. His wife passed away three years ago, and his kids live in Temecula (or somewhere else that's two thousand miles from where you are when he's trying to cure your game). Two of his old golf buddies are sidelined by cancer, and now he plays most of his golf as a walk on as well. His desire to give you advice is a feeble effort to try to find some way of connecting with you, because he laments the lost years and the ravages of old age. He sees what he could have been in you, and he's overwhelmed by the desire to impart to you all that he's learned that he cannot do over his many years on the links.

 

2. Wily old veterans. These are the other 55+ guys that were pretty good players at one point in their career. They don't like being beaten by younger fellas. They're trying to get into your head. You, in a moment of weakness, allow them to, thereby demonstrating that you have a weakness. Chalk one up for the wily vet.

 

3. The sincere student of the game....comes in any age over 30, and fancies himself as knowing a little about instruction. He has his own theories about his own swing that comes from countless hours of watching himself on videotape. He truly does have an idea of why you snaphooked that last one, but we all know it was because the other old fellow in the foursome tried to give you a tip on the last tee.

 

I've learned to smile politely, give them one shot and thank them for their thoughts, then change the subject to what they really want to talk about, which is probably their own game.

 

Totally agree with this comment. There's a guy at my range that actually relocates whenever he sees a golfer in need of tips OR a cute girl. He relocates to the 2nd floor of range, 1st floor, left end, right end, dead center...wherever he'll get the most attention. Oh, he sucks too. The guy tees up every shot, including wedge shots.

[KMeloney]

I've been guilty of this, I'm sure. But, in my defense, I've only given advice to buddies of mine (and only a couple of them), and I try to limit it to set-up stuff (not swing issues, since I'm certainly no pro). For instance, I've got a couple buddies who always align themselves completely closed to the target, then wonder why they pushed the ball directly where they're pointing, or swung across their body and hooked it. I'll recommend they put a club across their toes and see for themselves where they're pointing. I know that *I* can't align myself without aligning to a spot a foot infront of the ball -- with astigmatism in one eye, I'm sure I'm not getting the whole picture once I'm over the ball. Looks like some of my friends aren't, either.

 

Then there's the guy who plays the ball so far forward that the club bottoms out 6" behind the ball -- and he wonders why he's chunking 'em. You obviously need to be in a general position to give yourself a chance to hit the ball before you ever swing at it...

 

I've NEVER offered advice to anyone I didn't know. That's just... Desperate. People really do that, huh? Wow.

 

Anyway, right or wrong (and I know it's wrong), I'm just going to stop altogether, close buddies and all. Afterall, if it's secretly annoying them, then that's no good. And, why the heck would I want them to improve to the point where they could beat me?! :tongue:

 

There. I feel better now. :D

 

/< / /2 /<

[chesterrc]

I have never seen a truly good player, or a PGA teaching pro, offer unsolicited advice on a course.

 

Amen. To take it one step further, I have never seen a good player or PGA Teaching pro offer unsolicited advice anywhere.

[sheppy335]

I would never, ever give someone a tip. I might look at them and think boy they are not doing something right. If asked what advice i would give them, i tell them go here and ask for so in so and get a series of lessons from him. I tell the a PGA Professional is who thery want to get advice from.

 

I dont like when people offer it to me so i dont offer it out.

[meroj]

Some of the older guys that I used to play (I was the young one at 40 y.o.) with in a leauge would offer 50 opinions on what I should do differently after a bad shot. Normally this type of advise could be tolerated, but I routinely would beat these guys by 10 shots on 9 holes. At times it would annoy me, but after a while, I started to realize that they thought they were being helpful and nice.

 

My challenge was to effectivly block it from my mind. In a way it was good training for maintaining focus. :rolleyes: