Mental hurdle I keep tripping on

[ZGriswold83]

I can't delete this post, so I just edited it to contain nothing.  I get it, I actually suck at golf.

Edited June 6, 2023 by ZGriswold83

[Abh159]

My advice... You're not that good so stop worrying that people are watching you in awe as you play.

 

Sure, a 9 handicap might be less bad than a lot of other golfers, but you're still a bad golfer. 

 

That might sound harsh, but it's the truth. 🤷‍♂️

 

[sittingbull]

Thers always someone better.

[ZGriswold83]

23 minutes ago, Abh159 said:

My advice... You're not that good so stop worrying that people are watching you in awe as you play.

 

Sure, a 9 handicap might be less bad than a lot of other golfers, but you're still a bad golfer. 

 

That might sound harsh, but it's the truth. 🤷‍♂️

 

I'm not claiming to be great. Believe me, I tell myself I suck all the time.

[Is Golf Fun or Work]

You play to the level of your competition....I heard that from a former NFL RB I played with once.

 

If in awe of a 9 hdcp, your partners haven't gotten out much.

[caniac6]

Start playing with better players. I was between a 1&2, and played with a +2, and I was humbled pretty quickly. Also, worry about your own game, not what others think about you. Golf will jump up, and bite you when you least expect it.

[Fuscinator]

These aren't particularly useful thoughts you're having. When you're done with a round, think about what's the most obvious weakness in your game and practice it. When you're playing, think about what you're doing and let them worry about their own games.

[ZGriswold83]

8 minutes ago, caniac6 said:

Start playing with better players. I was between a 1&2, and played with a +2, and I was humbled pretty quickly. Also, worry about your own game, not what others think about you. Golf will jump up, and bite you when you least expect it.

I'm just never going to be able to be as good at golf as I want TBH, I think this thread just showed me that.  I've tried everything from youtube rabbit holes to online coaching. I'm just trying to figure out how to get better and I just don't think it's going to happen for me.

[kiwh]

“Better”…. I got better when I stopped keeping score. But “my better” was enjoying my good shots. 

I was way too hard on myself. All the time. Golf was hard and not fun. 
 

Golf is still hard, but it’s fun again. I’m smiling when I string together 3 or 4 pars. And when I’m in the trees…. I live in Colorado…. So…..

 

Take it easy amigo 

[ZGriswold83]

17 minutes ago, kiwh said:

“Better”…. I got better when I stopped keeping score. But “my better” was enjoying my good shots. 

I was way too hard on myself. All the time. Golf was hard and not fun. 
 

Golf is still hard, but it’s fun again. I’m smiling when I string together 3 or 4 pars. And when I’m in the trees…. I live in Colorado…. So…..

 

Take it easy amigo 

I'm there right now. I'm just searching for anything to get better. I have had fun playing golf 3 or 4 times in the past 2ish years. I thought I was on to something after some online lessons this year, but I'm closer to hanging it up than being able to shoot my goal. Thanks for the post.

[PJE]

1 hour ago, ZGriswold83 said:

I have had fun playing golf 3 or 4 times in the past 2ish years. I thought I was on to something after some online lessons this year, but I'm closer to hanging it up than being able to shoot my goal. Thanks for the post.

Go easy on yourself.  Golf is hard. There's only about 200 guys in the whole world who are at the tip of the pyramid. And even they find it hard, at times. 

 

Consider that guy who almost won the Memorial, McCarthy. It was his 156th event and he blew it on the last hole. Meanwhile his contemporaries, guys like Jordan Spieth, etc., have long since eclipsed him. Check out McIlroy, talk about screwing it up. At least their angst is related to their livelihood. Golf for us is a pastime. 

 

If you don't get to your goal, what will happen? Nothing, except you didn't achieve your goal. That just gives you an opportunity to try again. 

Yes, you want to do well but the downside of not doing well is what? Making yourself feel poorly. You can control that narrative. 

 

My good friend passed away of cancer at a young age.  I think he'd have some fun playing golf, even badly. 

 

Hang in there. You will eventually achieve what you seek and it will be that much nicer when you do. 

 

[Pepperturbo]

4 hours ago, ZGriswold83 said:

'm not claiming to be great. Believe me, I tell myself I suck all the time.

There in lies the problem.

 

A buddy that plays to near scratch often says he sucks at golf.  It's his distorted way of being humble, only it doesn't work.

[ZGriswold83]

34 minutes ago, PJE said:

Go easy on yourself.  Golf is hard. There's only about 200 guys in the whole world who are at the tip of the pyramid. And even they find it hard, at times.

 

I'm knocking on the door of 40 and I don't do well with going easy on myself, never have. It's something that has held me back in golf and life in general.  I'm truly sorry to hear about your friend, thank you for trying to put things into perspective.

[ZGriswold83]

24 minutes ago, Pepperturbo said:

There in lies the problem.

 

A buddy that plays to near scratch often says he sucks at golf.  It's his distorted way of being humble, only it doesn't work.

I'm really bad about negative self talk, just in every day life. I don't say I'm bad to stay humble, I truly believe it.

[Ferguson]

6 hours ago, ZGriswold83 said:

I can't delete this post, so I just edited it to contain nothing.  I get it, I actually suck at golf.

 

 

How's the marriage?    

[ZGriswold83]

28 minutes ago, Ferguson said:

 

 

How's the marriage?    

It's amazing, guessing I can only have one right? Good marriage or good at golf?

[bobfoster]

Someone (on WRX) said something a few years ago, on a similar topic, that I still remember.

 

I was talking about the fact that I played a lot of golf, some with friends, often walking on and playing as a single. Was noticing that on way more than a few occasions, decent (single-cap) golfer could be real a**holes to play with. Kinda full of themselves. Yeah, they are "good" - around 2% of golfers will every actually break 80. And some of the funnest rounds I've had were with people that shot in the 90s or 100+, but didn't slow the course down, and didn't take themselves too seriously. 

 

The line I'll always remember? "Nobody cares how you play, they only care how you are to play with." Seriously true. I'd much rather play with folks that thoroughly enjoyed a 95 round, than a scratch golfer that throws clubs. 

 

 

Edited June 7, 2023 by bobfoster

[Soloman1]

7 hours ago, ZGriswold83 said:

I'm just never going to be able to be as good at golf as I want TBH, I think this thread just showed me that.  I've tried everything from youtube rabbit holes to online coaching. I'm just trying to figure out how to get better and I just don't think it's going to happen for me.

 

What a refreshingly honest comment.

 

Doesn't make you a bad person.

 

Now I, on the other hand, broke par my third time playing golf while going to medical school, law school at night, and flying with the Blue Angels. Oh, I was in astronaut training on weekends.

 

I worked as Executive VP of GM during the summers in undergraduate school while I founded several companies.

 

But, I found the time to practice for a couple of hours before playing the first time, and that’s all it took.

 

Some of us are just full or awesomeness and some just aren’t.

[Pepperturbo]

21 minutes ago, bobfoster said:

The line I'll always remember? "Nobody cares how you play, they only care how you are to play with." Seriously true. I'd much rather play with folks that thoroughly enjoyed a 95 round, than a scratch golfer that throws clubs. 

100% covers it. 🙂  What's interesting about that line - I took up golf because I could be as focused as I wanted on golf, yet enjoy the company of others that are not nearly as into golf as I am.  I will always select happy people.

 

People that take themselves so serious have no credentials to substantiate their pompous self-demands.  It's safe to say, they are not long for the game.  LOL 

 

You have a good week and play well.

[phizzy30]

7 hours ago, caniac6 said:

Start playing with better players. I was between a 1&2, and played with a +2, and I was humbled pretty quickly. Also, worry about your own game, not what others think about you. Golf will jump up, and bite you when you least expect it.

I actually tend to do better when I play with my + cap buddies and client.  I think I focus harder to the point where I'm in the "zone" so to speak.  Or maybe it's because we play for money and I don't wanna lose, lol.   

[Ferguson]

11 hours ago, ZGriswold83 said:

It's amazing, guessing I can only have one right? Good marriage or good at golf?

 

Yes.  I have seen countless guys try to stay on the fence. 

Eventually, you must make a choice. 

 

 

[ZGriswold83]

2 hours ago, Ferguson said:

 

Yes.  I have seen countless guys try to stay on the fence. 

Eventually, you must make a choice. 

 

 

I think I'm close to my choice. This is probably going to be my last year playing. I have tried everything to get better. It lasts about 2 weeks then it's gone again. It's worn me down and to me playing bad golf isn't fun.

[Ferguson]

11 minutes ago, ZGriswold83 said:

I think I'm close to my choice. This is probably going to be my last year playing. I have tried everything to get better. It lasts about 2 weeks then it's gone again. It's worn me down and to me playing bad golf isn't fun.

 

WRX gets a discount for divorce attorneys.  We also have access to very good therapists.  

 

[ZGriswold83]

23 minutes ago, Ferguson said:

 

WRX gets a discount for divorce attorneys.  We also have access to very good therapists.  

 

Therapist definitely.

[Ferguson]

3 hours ago, ZGriswold83 said:

Therapist definitely.

 

Liz - tell her Ferg sent you. 

 

https://www.millenniallifecounseling.com/