ONESOMES....find your own friends !!!

[Boogs2]

[quote name='jwknow' post='1986288' date='Oct 3 2009, 10:21 PM']Alright....this is starting to bug me because its starting to happen too often. What are your opinions on this?

I play a threesome frequently. Its me and two close friends. We've been playin together for years and we're not looking for a 4th.

Too often, there seems to be a ONESOME that comes up on the first tee or somewhere on the course that has the nuts to say "Hey, mind if I play with you guys"? Me and my buddies are pretty friendly guys but if we wanted to play a foursome we'd have called another friend.

I just can't see me havin the nuts to walk up to 3 strangers and asking if they care if I "horn" in on their game.

Whats with the "onesomes"? What gives them the gall to even ask?

Me and my buddies figure if a single can't find anybody to golf with....especially on the weekend.... there's probably a reason.

Anybody have any opinions on this or should we be forced to play with a stranger even though we didn't "invite" him to be a part of our group?

Keep in mind....this isn't someone from the clubhouse sending these ONESOMES out to pair up with us....its the ONESOMES themselves.

JW[/quote]


You say you're not trying to be derogatory but look at you're title: "ONESOMES...find your own friends!!!"
I'd say that is derogatory implying or insinuating that singles cant find friends or dont have any friends. I play alone alot during the weekdays but on the weekends...i usually play with family/friends. Golf is a great way to network or make friends and I have made good friends with random people or people who work on the course or golf stores. Golf is more than a game...it's about building friendships and meeting new people good or bad. If you dont want a single to join your group, then do what the other people here suggested by either paying for the 4th spot, politely saying that you'd rather play as a 3-some, or invite them to play. It's that simple. You say that everyone here is missing the point yet you have not stated your central theme to this post. Please do and enlighten us with you're true meaning to this post as all of us are baffled by what you reall "mean".

Also you say that you wouldnt have the nuts to ask to join a threesome...well therein lies the problem. It seems to me a lack of self confidence or introvert tendencies. Maybe you should "grow a pair" by decling the single or going out by yourself and put yourself in their shoes and see how it must be hard to ask to join a group that you dont even know.

Just callin it how I see it...not trying to be disrespectful.

[arydolphin]

jwknow,
Looks like you think that most people are misunderstanding you, so I have a couple of questions for you. First of all, a little background on myself: I work at a hospital and work very weird hours (lots of nights and weekends), so I mostly get to go out as a single during weekdays. Also, I just moved to where I now live and don't know very many other people that play golf, so that's another reason why I go out as a single. Yes, I'm calling myself a single because I've never heard the term onesome until I came across this thread.

First question: are you playing at a private club or a public course? If you're at a private club and are having this issue, take it up with the head pro or the club director. If you're playing on a public course, I don't have a whole lot of sympathy for you because it's a public course. I don't belong to a private club, so I play on public courses around here. A lot of public courses won't even take tee times for singles, they'll just tell me to show up at the course and unless the course is wide-open, I'll get paired with someone else. You say that the clubhouse isn't sending the singles out to be paired up with you, how do you know that? Whenver I've played as a single and been paired up with other people, there's usually a starter that comes up to the group that I'm getting paired up with and asks if that is ok, does that not happen where you play?

Finally, think about it: when you started playing the game, did you already have friends to go out there with or did you have to make friends on the course? Some of the people that you're annoyed with are just starting to play the game, or are maybe like me and are new to the area and looking to find others that play golf (again, this is assuming that you're at a public course). Plus, it's not like you're not able to hang out with your boys even with one other person there...I've been put into a group with 3 other guys that haven't said anything to me during the round except "good shot" or "you're away" because the 3 other guys all know one another. I'm fine with that, just as long as the other people that I'm paired up with aren't outwardly mean to me. So let us know a little more about your situation, and maybe people will understand you more.

[OpusX20]

I posted this story below on another thread where the topic was people you would never forget playing with. You didn't happen to be in Ponte Vedra Beach back in February of 1996 were you?


[quote name='OpusX20' post='1937290' date='Sep 7 2009, 12:43 AM']I was playing the Valley Course at the TPC @ Sawgrass. My threesome was on deck and there was a threesome on the tee waiting for the group in front of them to clear the fairway. While they were waiting a woman drives up in a cart and has a conversation. She then gets in her cart and drives back to us. She introduces herself and asks if she can join up. I say yes and introduce her to the other two guys. She tells us that the guys in front of us didn't want her to join, because they thought she would slow them down. One of my playing partners recognized her after a couple of holes. Turns out she was an LPGA Hall of Famer. She played the tourney tees with us and had absolutely no problem keeping up. Needless to say, we waited on the group in front of us for the entire round.

-1 for golf stereotypes.[/quote]

I'm sure the group in front of us had a grand old time playing with just their friends. But, they missed out on a once in a lifetime opportunity.

[turbo4door]

Epic thread failure. I love these....





I practice quite a bit on my own. It lets me focus a bit more. While I may not always seek out someone to play with (course is usually empty when I get there), I certainly don't mind anyone asking to play alongside if the opportunity presents itself. I've had it all, people who can't hit the ball 3 feet, to people that drive greens. I learn something quite often in these cases too. Never know who you might meet. And I have a sneaking suspicion that if a rather attractive female "ONESOME" asked to join, you, billy-bob, and cletus wouldn't think twice about it.

[Omid Salehi]

I think I understand where the OP is coming from. Although its not sporting to reject every single that wants to join your threesome, sometimes you and your buds just want to be a threesome alone. I agree with the politely decline post. Whats with all the negativity, is everyone here a Carolina hurricanes fan?

Maybe its just the tone of your OP and title...

[Muteki]

I think the OP is saying that everyone is missing the point because these people ask to join his 3some, rather than are paired up via the clubhouse. He thinks there is something wrong with people that ask to join instead of are forced to join. Is this why you keep saying everyone is not getting what you posted?

Regardless, I disagree with you. Golf is supposed to be sociable. Does your course allow singles during these times when they ask to join your group? If they do, maybe they don't want to hog up an entire tee time as a single and would rather leave it open for others?

[Mr.B]

[quote name='jwknow' post='1986288' date='Oct 3 2009, 10:21 PM']Alright....this is starting to bug me because its starting to happen too often. What are your opinions on this?

I play a threesome frequently. Its me and two close friends. We've been playin together for years and we're not looking for a 4th.

Too often, there seems to be a ONESOME that comes up on the first tee or somewhere on the course that has the nuts to say "Hey, mind if I play with you guys"? Me and my buddies are pretty friendly guys but if we wanted to play a foursome we'd have called another friend.

I just can't see me havin the nuts to walk up to 3 strangers and asking if they care if I "horn" in on their game.

Whats with the "onesomes"? What gives them the gall to even ask?

Me and my buddies figure if a single can't find anybody to golf with....especially on the weekend.... there's probably a reason.

Anybody have any opinions on this or should we be forced to play with a stranger even though we didn't "invite" him to be a part of our group?

Keep in mind....this isn't someone from the clubhouse sending these ONESOMES out to pair up with us....its the ONESOMES themselves.

JW[/quote]



Congratulations on your nomination for 'Ignorant DB Post of the Month'

[kyo-nax]

 

Dude, when was this pic taken? Guy on the left has burner bubble irons!! lol

 

 

Anyway, unless golf courses stop letting "onesome" pay for their round, you will not find a solution.

Some people and everyone here in WRX love golf so not having someone to golf that time of the day is going to stop them from playing?

 

Like others have said, some of my best friends I have are met from golfing single. I moved to ATL 3 years ago, and I have so many #'s written on the scorecard.

 

You should try playing single and if you are not entertaining a client, you should let them in with open arms. I really think you must have had a very bad experiences...

[mickw]

[quote name='OpusX20' post='1986401' date='Oct 3 2009, 11:24 PM']I posted this story below on another thread where the topic was people you would never forget playing with. You didn't happen to be in Ponte Vedra Beach back in February of 1996 were you?


[quote name='OpusX20' post='1937290' date='Sep 7 2009, 12:43 AM']I was playing the Valley Course at the TPC @ Sawgrass. My threesome was on deck and there was a threesome on the tee waiting for the group in front of them to clear the fairway. While they were waiting a woman drives up in a cart and has a conversation. She then gets in her cart and drives back to us. She introduces herself and asks if she can join up. I say yes and introduce her to the other two guys. She tells us that the guys in front of us didn't want her to join, because they thought she would slow them down. One of my playing partners recognized her after a couple of holes. Turns out she was an LPGA Hall of Famer. She played the tourney tees with us and had absolutely no problem keeping up. Needless to say, we waited on the group in front of us for the entire round.

-1 for golf stereotypes.[/quote]

I'm sure the group in front of us had a grand old time playing with just their friends. But, they missed out on a once in a lifetime opportunity.
[/quote]

Enough said...pretty much sums it up in a nutshell.

[Buzzkill]

[quote name='jwknow' post='1986288' date='Oct 3 2009, 07:21 PM']Alright....this is starting to bug me because its starting to happen too often. [b]What are your opinions on this?[/b]

I play a threesome frequently. Its me and two close friends. We've been playin together for years and we're not looking for a 4th.

Too often, there seems to be a ONESOME that comes up on the first tee or somewhere on the course that has the nuts to say "Hey, mind if I play with you guys"? Me and my buddies are pretty friendly guys but if we wanted to play a foursome we'd have called another friend.

I just can't see me havin the nuts to walk up to 3 strangers and asking if they care if I "horn" in on their game.

Whats with the "onesomes"? What gives them the gall to even ask?

Me and my buddies figure if a single can't find anybody to golf with....especially on the weekend.... there's probably a reason.

Anybody have any opinions on this or should we be forced to play with a stranger even though we didn't "invite" him to be a part of our group?

Keep in mind....this isn't someone from the clubhouse sending these ONESOMES out to pair up with us....its the ONESOMES themselves.

JW[/quote]

Hope you got some opinions.

[Ogre41]

I see both sides of the story here. When I get out with me a a couple buddies, we know they are going to add a 4th if there is one (and over the summer, there always is one). We introduce ourselves, play our round, and are cordial with him )never had the 4th be a girl). Do we joke around with him? No. Do we complement him when he hits a nice shot? Yes. Will we ever play with him again? Probably not unless the same circumstances happen again. Sometimes the guys are awesome to play with. Sometimes they will annoy the hell out of me. But they deserve to be out there playing and they deserve to be treated respectfully. Does that mean I like the guy? Not always. But I will always be nice to the guy.

[bluetrane]

[quote name='turbo4door' post='1986404' date='Oct 3 2009, 10:25 PM'][b]Epic thread failure. I love these....
[/b]




I practice quite a bit on my own. It lets me focus a bit more. While I may not always seek out someone to play with (course is usually empty when I get there), I certainly don't mind anyone asking to play alongside if the opportunity presents itself. I've had it all, people who can't hit the ball 3 feet, to people that drive greens. I learn something quite often in these cases too. Never know who you might meet. And I have a sneaking suspicion that if a rather attractive female "ONESOME" asked to join, you, billy-bob, and cletus wouldn't think twice about it.[/quote]

That made me crack up a little. It's nice to see that a lot of golfers here have, one time or another, played as a single or joined a group of 2,3 etc. It's part of the game.

I've played NYC muni courses for a while now and i've grown accustomed to playing with people from all walks of life. When I drive up north, where it's less populated, I almost always play by myself. One time I played a round by myself but ended up stuck behind a group of beginners. A group of 3 pulled up behind me on the tee and I politely asked, "since we're going to be here a while would you mind if I joined your group?". They gave me a blank stare like I was come crazy nutcase and didn't respond to what I said. After the group ahead finally hit the ball they said nah we're going to play as a threesome with that same blank stare. I felt a little odd, like I offended them in some way by even having the gall to ask to join their "threesome", but understood and drove the ball down the fairway.

If you don't want a ONESOME to join your group then just say sorry we'd like to play as a threesome and move on. I'm sure the single won't mind at all.

OH and one more thing. "ONESOMES" have golfing buddies too. Find some friends ehh?

[harold baines]

[quote name='Muteki' post='1986412' date='Oct 3 2009, 11:30 PM']I think the OP is saying that everyone is missing the point because these people ask to join his 3some, rather than are paired up via the clubhouse. He thinks there is something wrong with people that ask to join instead of are forced to join. Is this why you keep saying everyone is not getting what you posted?

Regardless, I disagree with you. Golf is supposed to be sociable. Does your course allow singles during these times when they ask to join your group? If they do, maybe they don't want to hog up an entire tee time as a single and would rather leave it open for others?[/quote]

that may be what he be thinking we missed,

but really, where did the single come from? it's not like people just come from nowhere and walk on without taking to the pro-shop or starter

the single may not be announced over the loudspeaker, but if he's a late add to the group they're probably not going to re-announce the group over the speaker

[RICKYBOBBY]

Its funny you mention this OP cause I hate just the opposite. One course I go to alot does not have tee times which is fine but on a Saturday its quite busy, there have been times when I have had the gall to ask a 2or threesome infront of me if they minded if I join them. Not only does it help me out but I also dont hold up another group behind me waiting for the single to get out of their way.

It bothers me when they say NO. Look I dont want to be your best friend, truth is Im really quiet on the course and probably wont even talk to you, I just want to play 18 shoot a good score and go home. So why dont you like people joining you?

oh and one more thing...

[bobmarley]

The OP and his friends (all 2 of them ) fail.

I usually play with the same 4-5 people but in the event a friend can't make it, we don't mind a solo player joining us for the round. You never know who you will meet.

[jwknow]

[quote name='ionakana511' post='1986397' date='Oct 3 2009, 11:21 PM'][quote name='jwknow' post='1986288' date='Oct 3 2009, 10:21 PM']Alright....this is starting to bug me because its starting to happen too often. What are your opinions on this?

I play a threesome frequently. Its me and two close friends. We've been playin together for years and we're not looking for a 4th.

Too often, there seems to be a ONESOME that comes up on the first tee or somewhere on the course that has the nuts to say "Hey, mind if I play with you guys"? Me and my buddies are pretty friendly guys but if we wanted to play a foursome we'd have called another friend.

I just can't see me havin the nuts to walk up to 3 strangers and asking if they care if I "horn" in on their game.

Whats with the "onesomes"? What gives them the gall to even ask?

Me and my buddies figure if a single can't find anybody to golf with....especially on the weekend.... there's probably a reason.

Anybody have any opinions on this or should we be forced to play with a stranger even though we didn't "invite" him to be a part of our group?

Keep in mind....this isn't someone from the clubhouse sending these ONESOMES out to pair up with us....its the ONESOMES themselves.

JW[/quote]


You say you're not trying to be derogatory but look at you're title: "ONESOMES...find your own friends!!!"
I'd say that is derogatory implying or insinuating that singles cant find friends or dont have any friends. I play alone alot during the weekdays but on the weekends...i usually play with family/friends. Golf is a great way to network or make friends and I have made good friends with random people or people who work on the course or golf stores. Golf is more than a game...it's about building friendships and meeting new people good or bad. If you dont want a single to join your group, then do what the other people here suggested by either paying for the 4th spot, politely saying that you'd rather play as a 3-some, or invite them to play. It's that simple. You say that everyone here is missing the point yet you have not stated your central theme to this post. Please do and enlighten us with you're true meaning to this post as all of us are baffled by what you reall "mean".

Also you say that you wouldnt have the nuts to ask to join a threesome...well therein lies the problem. It seems to me a lack of self confidence or introvert tendencies. Maybe you should "grow a pair" by decling the single or going out by yourself and put yourself in their shoes and see how it must be hard to ask to join a group that you dont even know.

Just callin it how I see it...not trying to be disrespectful.
[/quote]

Finally....someone used the "keyword" of the point that I was trying to make......INVITE !!!!!! Probably too late for that to mean anything after the "gang mentality" going on but that was the WHOLE POINT of my post.

If you're playing by yourself and come up on a THREESOME, see if they INVITE you to play along. Don't INVITE yourself to join the group. There may be a reason why they are only playing a THREESOME and if they don't INVITE you to play with them be courteous enough to not ASK to join. Pretty good chance that they will offer to let you "play through" if they aren't looking for a 4th.....like we do when we aren't looking for a FOURSOME.

That was my reason for telling people to RE-READ my post. I thought it was clear.

Ya just can't slow down the "gang mentality" once it gets started though....can ya? Go boys....GO !!!!

[harold baines]

so you're saying that you're not able to say you'd like to not be joined?

(assuming you're not on the 1st tee)

if they have the nerve to ask, you should have the nerve to say no if you don't want them to join (and once again, assuming you're not on the 1st tee)

[andechr]

Wow...

 

All the threesomes I have been a part of would have gladly welcomed any single young men who wanted to play with us.

 

 

[RICKYBOBBY]

Wow so in your 210 word response we were supposed to pull out the word invite? Dang i failed the test. what if you just said "nah thats ok man, why dont you just play thru."

[jwknow]

[quote name='Buzzkill' post='1986423' date='Oct 3 2009, 11:38 PM'][quote name='jwknow' post='1986288' date='Oct 3 2009, 07:21 PM']Alright....this is starting to bug me because its starting to happen too often. [b]What are your opinions on this?[/b]

I play a threesome frequently. Its me and two close friends. We've been playin together for years and we're not looking for a 4th.

Too often, there seems to be a ONESOME that comes up on the first tee or somewhere on the course that has the nuts to say "Hey, mind if I play with you guys"? Me and my buddies are pretty friendly guys but if we wanted to play a foursome we'd have called another friend.

I just can't see me havin the nuts to walk up to 3 strangers and asking if they care if I "horn" in on their game.

Whats with the "onesomes"? What gives them the gall to even ask?

Me and my buddies figure if a single can't find anybody to golf with....especially on the weekend.... there's probably a reason.

Anybody have any opinions on this or should we be forced to play with a stranger even though we didn't "invite" him to be a part of our group?

Keep in mind....this isn't someone from the clubhouse sending these ONESOMES out to pair up with us....its the ONESOMES themselves.

JW[/quote]

Hope you got some opinions.
[/quote]

Just a couple.

[mickw]

What's so diffficult about saying "No thank you, we would rather remain a threesome. But you can play through, if you'd like to." I fail to see how the action of the single asking to join you...would get you up in arms enough to write this post.

[jwknow]

[quote name='3onpar5' post='1986477' date='Oct 4 2009, 12:21 AM']Wow so in your 210 word response we were supposed to pull out the word invite? Dang i failed the test. what if you just said "nah thats ok man, why dont you just play thru."[/quote]

It's OK if you failed....I understand. It's all about reading comprehension skills. You either have it or you don't.

The word "invite" wasn't in there. Didn't think it needed to be. I thought intelligent people would be able to decipher the meaning of the whole post a little better. I guess not.

[Boogs2]

[quote name='jwknow' post='1986464' date='Oct 4 2009, 12:11 AM'][quote name='ionakana511' post='1986397' date='Oct 3 2009, 11:21 PM'][quote name='jwknow' post='1986288' date='Oct 3 2009, 10:21 PM']Alright....this is starting to bug me because its starting to happen too often. What are your opinions on this?

I play a threesome frequently. Its me and two close friends. We've been playin together for years and we're not looking for a 4th.

Too often, there seems to be a ONESOME that comes up on the first tee or somewhere on the course that has the nuts to say "Hey, mind if I play with you guys"? Me and my buddies are pretty friendly guys but if we wanted to play a foursome we'd have called another friend.

I just can't see me havin the nuts to walk up to 3 strangers and asking if they care if I "horn" in on their game.

Whats with the "onesomes"? What gives them the gall to even ask?

Me and my buddies figure if a single can't find anybody to golf with....especially on the weekend.... there's probably a reason.

Anybody have any opinions on this or should we be forced to play with a stranger even though we didn't "invite" him to be a part of our group?

Keep in mind....this isn't someone from the clubhouse sending these ONESOMES out to pair up with us....its the ONESOMES themselves.

JW[/quote]


You say you're not trying to be derogatory but look at you're title: "ONESOMES...find your own friends!!!"
I'd say that is derogatory implying or insinuating that singles cant find friends or dont have any friends. I play alone alot during the weekdays but on the weekends...i usually play with family/friends. Golf is a great way to network or make friends and I have made good friends with random people or people who work on the course or golf stores. Golf is more than a game...it's about building friendships and meeting new people good or bad. If you dont want a single to join your group, then do what the other people here suggested by either paying for the 4th spot, politely saying that you'd rather play as a 3-some, or invite them to play. It's that simple. You say that everyone here is missing the point yet you have not stated your central theme to this post. Please do and enlighten us with you're true meaning to this post as all of us are baffled by what you reall "mean".

Also you say that you wouldnt have the nuts to ask to join a threesome...well therein lies the problem. It seems to me a lack of self confidence or introvert tendencies. Maybe you should "grow a pair" by decling the single or going out by yourself and put yourself in their shoes and see how it must be hard to ask to join a group that you dont even know.

Just callin it how I see it...not trying to be disrespectful.
[/quote]

Finally....someone used the "keyword" of the point that I was trying to make......INVITE !!!!!! Probably too late for that to mean anything after the "gang mentality" going on but that was the WHOLE POINT of my post.

If you're playing by yourself and come up on a THREESOME, see if they INVITE you to play along. Don't INVITE yourself to join the group. There may be a reason why they are only playing a THREESOME and if they don't INVITE you to play with them be courteous enough to not ASK to join. Pretty good chance that they will offer to let you "play through" if they aren't looking for a 4th.....like we do when we aren't looking for a FOURSOME.

That was my reason for telling people to RE-READ my post. I thought it was clear.

Ya just can't slow down the "gang mentality" once it gets started though....can ya? Go boys....GO !!!!
[/quote]


Well most of hte time...people ask to join a group. There are many ways that this type of situation can play through. 1.) The 3some invites the single to join 2.) The single asks to join the 3some (out of respect for the people behind him/her) 3.) Both parties say nothing and hope that it stays the same 4.) The single is forced into the 3some because of the starter (depending whether they are just starting the 1st hole). So it really depends on the situation. You also have to understand that people have different attitudes in general and they may see them "inviting" themselves to join your 3some as not imposing or disrespectful to your group...you have to take that into account as well.

If that was you're central theme, then all it was was miscommunication in the post. Also, I dont believe it's really gang mentality. A lot of people seem to side against your opinion or view on the scenario but that does not automatically result in a "gang mentality", the majority just dont side with your post, thats all.

[bigred90gt]

[quote name='jwknow' post='1986464' date='Oct 3 2009, 11:11 PM']Finally....someone used the "keyword" of the point that I was trying to make......INVITE !!!!!! Probably too late for that to mean anything after the "gang mentality" going on but that was the WHOLE POINT of my post.

If you're playing by yourself and come up on a THREESOME, see if they INVITE you to play along. Don't INVITE yourself to join the group. There may be a reason why they are only playing a THREESOME and if they don't INVITE you to play with them be courteous enough to not ASK to join. Pretty good chance that they will offer to let you "play through" if they aren't looking for a 4th.....like we do when we aren't looking for a FOURSOME.

That was my reason for telling people to RE-READ my post. I thought it was clear.

Ya just can't slow down the "gang mentality" once it gets started though....can ya? Go boys....GO !!!![/quote]

So, what you are saying is that you are so much better than those pathetic "onesomes", that they have to be invited to be in your company? Got it.

[Tupperwolf]

[jwknow]

[quote name='mickw' post='1986481' date='Oct 4 2009, 12:27 AM']What's so diffficult about saying "No thank you, we would rather remain a threesome. But you can play through, if you'd like to." I fail to see how the action of the single asking to join you...would get you up in arms enough to write this post.[/quote]

Whats so difficult about not "Inviting Yourself" and just waiting to see if your "invited" to play along or offered to play through? Is that really that unreasonable?

Up in arms????.....might be a little extreme. Was just asking a question and been sitting back watching it get twisted in several different ways. Interesting....

[oregongolf]

I guess there's nothing wrong with telling a guy he can play through, rather than join up... but if it's off the first tee, you've gotta sack up and quit acting dickish.

Still, I've never once in my life told a guy no and I've never asked... always been invited. Usually I'd much rather just place through anyway if given the opportunity. I get the point you're trying to make, but someone who would say no to any single isn't exactly the type of person I wanna play with.

I've gotta ask though, do your other two buddies truly feel the same way too, or is it just you? Your whole peeve just seems odd... it's like you've found two like minded people and you can all only stand each other. Kinda the definition of the "that guy" thread that was so popular here awhile ago.

Anyways... if I'm in Ohio anytime soon, I'll make sure and find another person to play with so I don't intrude.

[cb_golfer]

[quote name='mickw' post='1986481' date='Oct 3 2009, 09:27 PM']What's so diffficult about saying "No thank you, we would rather remain a threesome. But you can play through, if you'd like to." I fail to see how the action of the single asking to join you...would get you up in arms enough to write this post.[/quote]

That would be too clear and succinct. Much like using "onesomes" instead of singles.

[kyo-nax]

[quote name='mickw' post='1986481' date='Oct 4 2009, 12:27 AM']What's so diffficult about saying "No thank you, we would rather remain a threesome. But you can play through, if you'd like to." I fail to see how the action of the single asking to join you...would get you up in arms enough to write this post.[/quote]
+1
I just don't get it. Say no thank you. Common sense is not common these days.

And you are upset because the opinions you asked for is not same as yours??
You asked if single asked to join, what would people think, and got what you asked for.
You said you don't like it, but most people don't mind at all. Just because you are minority, doesn't mean you need to cry about people not agreeing with you.

[Desert Golf]

[quote name='jwknow' post='1986464' date='Oct 3 2009, 09:11 PM'][quote name='ionakana511' post='1986397' date='Oct 3 2009, 11:21 PM'][quote name='jwknow' post='1986288' date='Oct 3 2009, 10:21 PM']Alright....this is starting to bug me because its starting to happen too often. What are your opinions on this?

I play a threesome frequently. Its me and two close friends. We've been playin together for years and we're not looking for a 4th.

Too often, there seems to be a ONESOME that comes up on the first tee or somewhere on the course that has the nuts to say "Hey, mind if I play with you guys"? Me and my buddies are pretty friendly guys but if we wanted to play a foursome we'd have called another friend.

I just can't see me havin the nuts to walk up to 3 strangers and asking if they care if I "horn" in on their game.

Whats with the "onesomes"? What gives them the gall to even ask?

Me and my buddies figure if a single can't find anybody to golf with....especially on the weekend.... there's probably a reason.

Anybody have any opinions on this or should we be forced to play with a stranger even though we didn't "invite" him to be a part of our group?

Keep in mind....this isn't someone from the clubhouse sending these ONESOMES out to pair up with us....its the ONESOMES themselves.

JW[/quote]


You say you're not trying to be derogatory but look at you're title: "ONESOMES...find your own friends!!!"
I'd say that is derogatory implying or insinuating that singles cant find friends or dont have any friends. I play alone alot during the weekdays but on the weekends...i usually play with family/friends. Golf is a great way to network or make friends and I have made good friends with random people or people who work on the course or golf stores. Golf is more than a game...it's about building friendships and meeting new people good or bad. If you dont want a single to join your group, then do what the other people here suggested by either paying for the 4th spot, politely saying that you'd rather play as a 3-some, or invite them to play. It's that simple. You say that everyone here is missing the point yet you have not stated your central theme to this post. Please do and enlighten us with you're true meaning to this post as all of us are baffled by what you reall "mean".

Also you say that you wouldnt have the nuts to ask to join a threesome...well therein lies the problem. It seems to me a lack of self confidence or introvert tendencies. Maybe you should "grow a pair" by decling the single or going out by yourself and put yourself in their shoes and see how it must be hard to ask to join a group that you dont even know.

Just callin it how I see it...not trying to be disrespectful.
[/quote]

Finally....someone used the "keyword" of the point that I was trying to make......INVITE !!!!!! Probably too late for that to mean anything after the "gang mentality" going on but that was the WHOLE POINT of my post.

If you're playing by yourself and come up on a THREESOME, see if they INVITE you to play along. Don't INVITE yourself to join the group. There may be a reason why they are only playing a THREESOME and if they don't INVITE you to play with them be courteous enough to not ASK to join. Pretty good chance that they will offer to let you "play through" if they aren't looking for a 4th.....like we do when we aren't looking for a FOURSOME.

That was my reason for telling people to RE-READ my post. I thought it was clear.

Ya just can't slow down the "gang mentality" once it gets started though....can ya? Go boys....GO !!!!
[/quote]


I play as a single occasionally...usually on Fridays when I have the day off and my golfing friends are at work. It doesn't really matter to me if I get paired up with others or remain a single. If I'm paired up with others I almost always have a good time and meet a lot of interesting people. Every once in a while you get paired up with jerks and those days I wish I had played alone.

However, I don't ever ask if I can join a group. If the group asks me to join them I almost always will or if the starter pairs me up that is fine too. If I'm playing with my friends and we are a 3some we would welcome a 4th player. BUT, it is usually the case that the group or the starter initiates the pairing...not the single. Is there anything wrong with a single asking to join? I guess not...but it isn't something I do and I can't remember a time when a single has asked to join my 3some. Maybe JW didn't come across well but I don't think his question is out of line.