Losing my playing partners.

[jrich61820]

I'm a younger guy (36) who is a teacher. I play A LOT of golf in the summer with a group of retired guys.

I have really grown to love these old timers like family, so losing a couple of them over the last two yrs has been hard.

Anyone else out there in the same boat as me?

[MtlJeff]

I was a member at a course for a few years, we had a regular foursome, all guys my age and really good guys. We remain really good friends today....but one year we just decided to all go our seperate ways. The course we were at was a disaster and was failing, 2 of my friends were Jewish and wanted to go to a Jewish club, the other joined the club where his dad was a member.

I decided to join a whole other club basically by myself. Been there 4 years now and have made many new friends....i'm sure you too will find some new buddies. Just give it some time!

[MidwestGolfBum]

I am 15-20 years younger than most of the guys I play golf with. They all have families and everything that goes with it and I don't so I don't always get included in many of the "family events" which I completely understand. I have a lot of things that I also do that aren't family oriented and they don't get invited to those things. When we get together as a group of couples and the kids and families don't get talked about, we all have so much in common it's kind of scary.

Point being, while it's hard to have those kinds of losses, you will find more/another group that will quickly become family despite any differences that you may have in life.

[MichiganSRT8]

Im the same way. I grew up playing at a local course a lot all day every day in the summer when I was young 10-17 and as a single would get paired up with a lot of old guys, most of which were war vets and would tell me great stories as I played with them, most 50+ years older than me. Would see a few of them frequently enough to know a few by name and they knew me, now after going to college and playing college golf and coming back (I'm 24) I have seen almost none of them and it makes me very sad, especially after losing my father in high school as well when I was 17. Many of the guys I played in college with as well have moved so my group has drastically changed so I understand what you're going through.

[butch33611]

Many years ago I ran a course. We had a lot of older members. I got know these people very well over the years. Every time one passed away I took it hard. These guys were like part of my extended family. I saw these guys everyday. Laughed and joked with them and played many rounds of golf with them. Its never easy when you lose someone you care about.

Life goes on.

[Roody]

I've lost several playing buddies in the past 3-4 years. For many different (but similar) reasons:

- One guy who used to play with me every single weekend, I now see maybe once a year ever since he got engaged and then married. I suspect he will return someday when the "new car smell" of marriage wears off.

- Another guy decided to start coaching multiple kids sports teams, so most of his time is spent on that. Hardly any time for golf

- Another friend joined a private club that's about a 35-40 minute drive for me. Otherwise I'd have joined with him.

- My father in law used to play a lot with me, but since I can mostly only play weekends he doesn't much anymore. He started complaining about the price and the slow round times of weekend golf. So he mostly plays with his retired buddies on weekdays now. He'll drop $200 on the slots without blinking, but $40 for 18 w/cart on the weekends is "ridiculous". #OldManLogic

- One friend had twins, so there went most of his time. However, he at least gets out with me more than any of the above mentioned.

So yeah, I feel ya.

[farmer]

I'm 64, so I've been through this a lot.

[Divot_07]

I lost most of my playing partners to marriages. I was the only smart one to marry a cool woman who let's me golf when I want.

[artica]

[quote name='Divot_07' timestamp='1415237664' post='10403319']I lost most of my playing partners to marriages. I was the only smart one to marry a cool woman who let's me golf when I want.[/quote]

Same boat

My wife rocks, two kids 5 and under and she gives one day every week to golf. This with a job that has me traveling for 2-3 nights a week.

Unfortunately my wife is a rarity in comparison to my old golf buds. They get MAYBE one outing a month at best... I'm solo now considering joining a club next year.

[CRider]

If you get a chance to read Updike, have at it. The passage of time and the comradarie that passes with it is the story. Makes me so appreciate the moments, the summers, and the friends I get to know on the course. Sorry if this sounds trite. Great game, this golf.

[Jaylasvegas]

I have worked at my club for the past 10 years, and it pains me to see so many of the members either pass away or age to the point that they cannot enjoy this game. I have lost some playing partners due to them relocating or other things taking priorities over golf. Its sad but its all apart of life.

[Hutchi15]

[quote name='MichiganSRT8' timestamp='1415072380' post='10394113']Im the same way. I grew up playing at a local course a lot all day every day in the summer when I was young 10-17 and as a single would get paired up with a lot of old guys, most of which were war vets and would tell me great stories as I played with them, most 50+ years older than me. Would see a few of them frequently enough to know a few by name and they knew me, now after going to college and playing college golf and coming back (I'm 24) I have seen almost none of them and it makes me very sad, especially after losing my father in high school as well when I was 17. Many of the guys I played in college with as well have moved so my group has drastically changed so I understand what you're going through.[/quote] very sorry about your father..sounds like you learned a lot on the golf course especially from your older playing partners

[Steele47]

[quote name='MichiganSRT8' timestamp='1415072380' post='10394113']
Im the same way. I grew up playing at a local course a lot all day every day in the summer when I was young 10-17 and as a single would get paired up with a lot of old guys, most of which were war vets and would tell me great stories as I played with them, most 50+ years older than me. Would see a few of them frequently enough to know a few by name and they knew me, now after going to college and playing college golf and coming back (I'm 24) I have seen almost none of them and it makes me very sad, especially after losing my father in high school as well when I was 17. Many of the guys I played in college with as well have moved so my group has drastically changed so I understand what you're going through.
[/quote]

Yeah I identify here. Started playing at age 11 at AF Base in So Cal which has since closed. Played with the enlisted guys, up to Colonels and Generals. Great guys. Some were WWII, Korea, Viet Nam vets and some were really good friends. Remember, when I turned 16 there the Manager came up to me and said, "you're here all the time anyway, you want a job?" I replied, "sure". He gave me a broom and said, "ok get started then." Worked there for 7 years. Looking back, was funny how I'd call up a high ranking officer setting up a time for Saturday morning joking I was gonna kick their a** which was usually not the case. lol. Miss those guys but great memories. But yeah totally identify.

[CHE KJARRVERA]

Great thread - thanks.

Spent a few years playing 2-3x per week at a couple of clubs with regulars and enjoyed a shrinking handicap - happy days and excellent company with mostly older gents who kicked my butt with their consistent play and course reading ability.

A decade + later in my 40's with a busy career, house, kids and a lovely wife, I get guilt trips if playing more than 9 holes a fortnight. A sad state of affairs golfing wise - haha - but great in every other respect.

Advice to young golfers: stay consistent and regular with your hobbyist passions over the years (golf, fishing, music, cycling, cars, art, whatever) and make it clear when embarking on new work or relationships, that this weekly time out is an important part of your life and wellbeing!

All I know is that failing to keep a consistent few hours a week to myself (without impacting on the family) is currently my only regret - its something I'll be working on in 2015!

[Crpcaver]

I get a pass to our park district courses every year. We have a senior group that starts at 7:30 Monday through Friday. I have been the youngest the last 3 years. I'm 52 now but really enjoy playing with the old generation. Get to play with them on my days off. Age range is from me to 92. Great group of guys, but we have lost a few.