Former European Tour winner facing charges for stalking and death threats

[golfday]

Hate to hear this - I met him a few times when he was in college and he was the nicest, kindest, and amiable guy. Very laid back. 

 

The emails that he sent are obviously inexcusable, but I do believe that there was some abuse on the other side leading to that. This sounds like Dirty John Season 2 but with a gender reversal. All adult parties involved here need help and hopefully they can get it so that they don't mess up the kids that are caught in the middle.

[bladehunter]

On 8/7/2021 at 5:20 PM, golfgirlrobin said:

He literally threatened to murder her and her family. If you’re arguing you need to hear both sides before condemning that, there’s something wrong with you.  Yes, there are two sides to every divorce, and lots of miserable behavior on both sides, but none of it justifies threatening to kill people.

 

The 2000 women in the US murdered by their partners every year, and the tens of thousands murdered worldwide every year would appreciate it if you’d all remember that.

 

I had my own terrible divorce. Try divorcing a police officer if you want to know what powerless feels like.
 

I don’t want you to think that I’m condoning abusing anyone. Especially a lady. I’d step in front of a bus today to save my wife without a single thought.  I don’t want to be here if she’s not.  
 

But.  I’m trying to show the flip side of your story.  The evidence we have in front is us says that he was order to have supervised visits with his own kids.  That in itself isn’t right.  Then on top of that the social worker says they went great. So , she gripes until they change the social workers etc no doubt in hopes of a more one sided opinion so as to sway the final custody hearing.  
 

I have this curse of wanting to see both sides of anything.  In years past I’d be on your side completely.  Give her every ounce of the benefit.   But recent times have me thinking of the consequences of the current climate between the sexes.  One of them unfortunately is that you can’t cherry pick the moments for chivalry . So you get less of it out of caution.  Just being honest.  My own wife is the only exception to that for me.  I now question everyone equally.  

[golfandfishing]

2 hours ago, bladehunter said:

I don’t want you to think that I’m condoning abusing anyone. Especially a lady. I’d step in front of a bus today to save my wife without a single thought.  I don’t want to be here if she’s not.  
 

But.  I’m trying to show the flip side of your story.  The evidence we have in front is us says that he was order to have supervised visits with his own kids.  That in itself isn’t right.  Then on top of that the social worker says they went great. So , she gripes until they change the social workers etc no doubt in hopes of a more one sided opinion so as to sway the final custody hearing.  
 

I have this curse of wanting to see both sides of anything.  In years past I’d be on your side completely.  Give her every ounce of the benefit.   But recent times have me thinking of the consequences of the current climate between the sexes.  One of them unfortunately is that you can’t cherry pick the moments for chivalry . So you get less of it out of caution.  Just being honest.  My own wife is the only exception to that for me.  I now question everyone equally.  

I like to see both sides also Blade, but he threatened to kill her and her family. I’d say supervised visits are probably in order and her insistence that the reviews of his behavior needed more scrutiny might have been justified. Is he maybe threatening to kill a few people privately but putting on a show for a social worker?  

[bladehunter]

25 minutes ago, golfandfishing said:

I like to see both sides also Blade, but he threatened to kill her and her family. I’d say supervised visits are probably in order and her insistence that the reviews of his behavior needed more scrutiny might have been justified. Is he maybe threatening to kill a few people privately but putting on a show for a social worker?  

I read it as threats came after she changed the visits and social workers.   Maybe I’m incorrect there ?  Don’t know.  But assuming I’m correct , I think any father would eventually react with anger if he’d been forcibly separated from his kids.  
 

And I’ll again say i don’t condone his tact.  Or his choice of words.  

 

But. Anger is not an evil emotion. It’s ever bit as valid and useful as any other emotion.  The prognosticators  say to not be “ quick to anger “ somehow weve skipped to outlawing anger and call it the same. It’s not.  
 

If the scenario is as I read it , I don’t call that “ quick to anger “. More like a slow boil over.  But that’s my opinion.  And you know how those are.  They all stink to somebody.  
 

flip this around and ask why she didn’t require supervised visits ? She did try to manipulate the courts.  Right ?  I’m weighing words vs an action . To me words always weigh less.  Show me him with an action involving physical abuse or and I’ll gladly change my mind.  
 

id throw up lucas Glover as a reason why nobody should get the benefit of the doubt.  That poor man has been abused for years.  If he left her today he probably wouldn’t see his kids anytime soon.  I say Show me the video tape ! We just can’t go on words anymore.  
 

 

Edited August 10, 2021 by bladehunter

[golfandfishing]

25 minutes ago, bladehunter said:

I read it as threats came after she changed the visits and social workers.   Maybe I’m incorrect there ?  Don’t know.  But assuming I’m correct , I think any father would eventually react with anger if he’d been forcibly separated from his kids.  
 

And I’ll again say i don’t condone his tact.  Or his choice of words.  

 

But. Anger is not an evil emotion. It’s ever bit as valid and useful as any other emotion.  The prognosticators  say to not be “ quick to anger “ somehow weve skipped to outlawing anger and call it the same. It’s not.  
 

If the scenario is as I read it , I don’t call that “ quick to anger “. More like a slow boil over.  But that’s my opinion.  And you know how those are.  They all stink to somebody.  
 

flip this around and ask why she didn’t require supervised visits ? She did try to manipulate the courts.  Right ?  I’m weighing words vs an action . To me words always weigh less.  Show me him with an action involving physical abuse or and I’ll gladly change my mind.  
 

id throw up lucas Glover as a reason why nobody should get the benefit of the doubt.  That poor man has been abused for years.  If he left her today he probably wouldn’t see his kids anytime soon.  I say Show me the video tape ! We just can’t go on words anymore.  
 

 

Can’t argue with much of that. And every time Glover is on TV I think of that incident. I wonder if Oprah or whoever the current gasbag is will have him on to talk about how brave he is to overcome domestic violence and win on tour?  

[bladehunter]

43 minutes ago, golfandfishing said:

Can’t argue with much of that. And every time Glover is on TV I think of that incident. I wonder if Oprah or whoever the current gasbag is will have him on to talk about how brave he is to overcome domestic violence and win on tour?  

I appreciate the conversation….   If I flip my mind back to “ brother “ mode and this is my sister , and I’m honest.  I’d react as most do.  Knee jerk into wanting to beat the guy.   And  I’ve been in that situation with one sister , and I told him where I’d plant him. So I have no problem pointing out my own hypocrisy.  But that’s another tale.  😅.  
 

So I understand why we as decent males react that way.  It’s our nature to protect.  But we’re being told so much now that we are wrong for  acting naturally , that I enjoy playing devils advocate and having the discussion to see the reactions when the opportunity arises.  

 

Most won’t even try to see it as anything but “ damsel in distress “ mode.   I think that mode ran out in the 1950s.  .  And we now have no choice but to try to ask before we convict every guy who is just mad and frustrated at the double standard that’s denying him time with kids or similar.  This all will come to a head sooner than later because the hypocrisy is too great to continue to survive.  

[Pepperturbo]

17 hours ago, bladehunter said:

Anger is not an evil emotion. It’s ever bit as valid and useful as any other emotion.  The prognosticators  say to not be “ quick to anger “ somehow weve skipped to outlawing anger and call it the same. It’s not.  

I agree 100% with you, here. 

 

Except, for anger to not turn evil, it MUST be bridled by self-control.  The problem most hot headed males, even females face, they quickly react.  Without restraint to limit one's behavior before you know it, he and or she can cross the boundary line allowing children to witness blind-rage.

 

Potentially losing the grasp on one's children is NEVER justification, if for no other reason than, a parent's behavior always reflects on to their children.  Society must find ways to error on the side of child safeguard, knowing a lit fuse can devastate families.

Edited August 10, 2021 by Pepperturbo

[Ferguson]

At least they will get to recycle another bowling ball when they catch this guy. 

Angel might loan his out - who knows. 

 

 

 

 

 

[bladehunter]

32 minutes ago, Pepperturbo said:

I agree 100% with you, here. 

 

Except, for anger to not turn evil, it MUST be bridled by self-control.  The problem most hot headed males, even females face, they quickly react.  Without restraint to limit one's behavior before you know it, he and or she can cross the boundary line allowing children to witness blind-rage.

 

Potentially losing the grasp on one's children is NEVER justification, if for no other reason than, a parent's behavior always reflects on to their children.  Society must find ways to error on the side of child safeguard, knowing a lit fuse can devastate families.

Yep. I agree. That should be the goal.  But i draw the line at it being an automatic disqualification.  Loosing ones temper is by far not the worst thing a Child can see.  But I get your point.  I do.  It’s never a desirable thing.  Thanks for reading my thoughts.  I know it’s a challenge. 😂

[Pepperturbo]

43 minutes ago, bladehunter said:

Yep. I agree. That should be the goal.  But i draw the line at it being an automatic disqualification.  Loosing ones temper is by far not the worst thing a Child can see.  But I get your point.  I do.  It’s never a desirable thing.  Thanks for reading my thoughts.  I know it’s a challenge. 😂

Automatic - not without reasoning.

 

No, it's not the worst thing a child can see, but it does NOT help in any way, for a child to see a parent out of control.  Many studies have shown that children replicate what they see in their parents, they model us and rely on us.  That is the reason I live by example.  Everyone that knows me can, if need be, measure their reaction off my behavior.  I don't lose control, if anything, I instill confidence.

 

Nobody in my family has seen the side of me that is ugly, when I was in-county.  My grown son, is a good example.  He grew up watching his Dad under pressure of running a company during difficult and prosperous times, seeing me compete on the golf course, at the shooting range under a clock, running scenarios, and martial arts training, and still find the time to be supportive at all his events when growing up.  He learned the value of self-control and reason before reacting, cause he saw me.  He never saw me or his mother, angry and out of control.  He learned how to work hard, but make time to be a good father and husband, and as important, when it's time to step up and get in the slop to deal with pigs.  You have a wonderful day... 🙂

 

Edited August 10, 2021 by Pepperturbo

[Frankensteins Monster]

[oikos1]

In what world is it acceptable to make written death threats (based on the alleged evidence)?  From what I've read, not a single person in this thread would tolerate a written death threat directed at someone they loved.  No excuses.  And yet there it is, with an odd effort to justify it while knowing just about nothing about the history of the case, why someone would be required to have supervised visits, what the violations were for the alleged 166 violations of the restraining order and what the actual laws are for the country/countries this has taken place. 

 

So much that has been said that is complete minutiae and has zero, nada, zilcho to do with this specific situation.  But...entertaining nonetheless. 

[bladehunter]

36 minutes ago, oikos1 said:

In what world is it acceptable to make written death threats (based on the alleged evidence)?  From what I've read, not a single person in this thread would tolerate a written death threat directed at someone they loved.  No excuses.  And yet there it is, with an odd effort to justify it while knowing just about nothing about the history of the case, why someone would be required to have supervised visits, what the violations were for the alleged 166 violations of the restraining order and what the actual laws are for the country/countries this has taken place. 

 

So much that has been said that is complete minutiae and has zero, nada, zilcho to do with this specific situation.  But...entertaining nonetheless. 

That’s my whole point.  Too many choose a side without really knowing anything except male and female.    Trying to invoke thought.  That’s all.