Hit into at private club

[roll - gybe]

Ok, I'm a guest. Playing with a member - someone I am close to (not a business relationship). There is another guest with us - also in the same situation.

 

On an uphill par 5, I am left with 85 yards after scrambling back from an ugly tee shot. I am only a few strokes over par, haven't been out of place all day, and have yet to have the guys behind me within range. (In fact the first I heard of them was the previous hole. As I was putting for birdie on a par 4 one left the brake off on the tee box and beep beep beep the cart actually got away from him. First time I have seen that...)

 

I hit my 85 yard shot and I hear wizz, clunk. A ball lands 3 feet in front of me. The guy was in the fairway with a wood (not a 7i) in his hand.

 

I don't think he intended to plug me. However, I do think his brain was in outer space. I didn't take offense, but I did think I was on the wrong end of a dangerous situation.

 

...so I reached down and teed his ball up...

 

Thought I would just make him aware of his surroundings.

 

When he got up there he had a laugh. He said something like, "how could my ball land on a tee, what are the odds?"

 

I realized that he was really in outer space, so I pointed to myself while I stood on the next tee. I mean, wake up man. I calmly said "You almost hit me, I was right where you are standing."

 

He apologized, and I thought I had found a harmless way to wake the guy up. I mean, hitting a 3 wood on a par 5 when people aren't even on the green and not knowing where the ball landed is pretty damn spacy...

 

So the other guest with me, looks at me and says something about which I didn't even think. The guy is a member.

 

Oh my god.

 

He is a member. Of course, he should plug all the non-members.

 

But then, my friend pointed out that my behavior may reflect poorly on our host at this nice club. True enough. So I apologized to our host. He was nice and told me that if he were still a young man like me, there would have been hell to pay.

 

Thoughts?

[oregongolf]

Can't say you did anything too terrible...

 

I might have just left it on the tee and let that be it though.

[crtssxc]

A friend of mine is a member at a private club, and he has taken me out there a couple of times and I always try to be extra cautious about etiquette etc. However, member or not, the person should have been aware of his surroundings and not hit into you. I do not think that what you did was wrong in any way.

[ChxDigLongBall]

Believe me, you handled the situation in a much calmer manner than many people would have. Well played sir.

[Alefty]

I'd have stepped on it or pocketed it.

[stage1350]

Thank your friend. Whether you are in the right or not, creating problems when you are guest at another member's club is a sure fire way to never be invited back.

[Carolina Golfer 2]

I don't think you should burn in hell or anything. :diablo: But I wouldn't have done anything, like Stage said. When you are a guest at a club or even someone's home course, everything you do is a reflection on them. From what you where, to the way you treat the staff, the way you play..etc you get the idea.

 

You did the right thing about apologizing to your host and he took it well. As for the guy who hit into you, I have been a guests at some pretty nice private clubs and have been amazed as well at lack of golf etiquette displayed by some members. So it happens everywhere.

[Mr.Zee]

You really should have apologized for being in the way of his ball....

 

I kid... I kid... :tongue:

[roll - gybe]

Thought about stepping on it. Then I figured the guy would just have a bad lie and not get his head out of his rear end.

Like I said, I didn't think about the membership situation immediately following whiz, clunk.

 

I've seen one situation that resulted in no more invitations. I didn't really start with any risk to that, nor did I end with any. My thought was more about creating some discomfort for the member, who agreed with me. I knew he would agree. He is older and a year ago, I saved his noggin from a drive in flight. My concern was more about any grief he might get, of which there was none.

 

Still I didn't fully apply the game theory to the situation before I responed. My adrenaline was pumping.

[roll - gybe]

I don't think you should burn in hell or anything. :diablo: But I wouldn't have done anything, like Stage said. When you are a guest at a club or even someone's home course, everything you do is a reflection on them. From what you where, to the way you treat the staff, the way you play..etc you get the idea.

 

You did the right thing about apologizing to your host and he took it well. As for the guy who hit into you, I have been a guests at some pretty nice private clubs and have been amazed as well at lack of golf etiquette displayed by some members. So it happens everywhere.

 

 

This was the opinion of my other friend. Herein lies the discussion. I totally disagree.

 

I will tolerate a member telling me that I didn't get enough of every strand of grass in the the last divot to replace, or that these are the fastest greens in the twelve neighboring states, or that their handicaps aren't manipulated, it is just that they moved the blues back to the blacks or vice versa today... I can handle snobbery and typical manipulation to make members seem like better golfers, more sucessfully businessmen, etc...

 

However, being a dangerous player isn't something membership affords anyone. (IMO of course)

[OpusX20]

I wouldn't worry about it. You apologized to the host (which may not even me necessary, but nice either way). Personally, I probably would not have done anything. All of us have hit into someone and been hit into. The guys that do it accidentally are easy to identify: they usually yell FORE and come to apologize on the next tee. These folks "get it", so you don't really need to teach them a lesson. On the other hand are the clueless morons (like the guy behind you it sounds like). These guys don't get it and nothing you do will help. So for me it seems counterproductive either way to react.

 

Of course, I'd be lying if I said I had never "reacted" inappropriately when getting hit into.

[kylemacca01]

Am i lost or did all you do was tee his ball up and then tell him he had hit into you?

 

That doesnt really seem OTT to me at all!

 

Someone at my club had this happen, he teed up the ball and hit it back at them! This WAS ott and he got suspended lol.

[Rohlio]

This is from the first page of "The Rules of Golf" under the etiquette section:

 

"Safety

 

Players should ensure that no one is standing close by or in a position to be hit by the club, the ball or any stones, pebbles, twigs or the like when they make a stroke or practice swing.

 

Players should not play until the players in front are out of range.

 

Players should always alert greenstaff nearby or ahead when they are about to make a stroke that might endanger them.

 

If a player plays a ball in a direction where there is a danger of hitting someone, he should immediately shout a warning. The traditional word of warning in such situations is "fore."

 

Consideration for Other Players"

 

 

 

 

If you were my guest and another member did this to you, I would have said "I will take care of it". Then I would have talked to the other member that did it in private later. I would have been fine with you teeing up his ball to make your point, he was the one who violated the rules of golf in the first place. I would have requested you to not say anything to him about it unless he brought it up to apologize.

 

 

 

 

Either way I am glad you weren't hurt and in the end no harm no foul thankfully.

[Pepperturbo]

I've held membership a two high end clubs. Guest behavior is very important. If a guest’s behavior is perceived questionable by any other member consequences could come back to the member later.

 

That’s not common in private clubs, but is at muni tracks. For all you know, the member didn't mean to hit close to you. Maybe the member is like a friend of mine, can't see very well past 100yds. I can't count the number of times someone hits a ball purely and to their surprise it flies longer then ever before. I've done that one a few times over the years with driver, 2i and 4i. I never hit a 2i 245yds or 4i 215yds; but can count on my hand the number of times I’ve clocked driver over 300 yds off the tee. When it’s that infrequent waiting because it’s remotely possible is partly why play golf gets slow at times. Every joker thinks what if... so he waits; then he dribbles it off the tee like a doofus last week end.

 

I recall my almost blind buddy hit his 3wd 25 yds further one time on 475yd par 4; his ball rolled past some folks standing on the green, fortunately it was left off the green. I told him to get up there and apologize fast. That’s what courteous people do if they know they made a mistake.

 

Next time before you assume intent and touch another player’s golf ball, check to make sure.

[Swingtheclub]

the old Mountain out of a mole hill

 

We should have a poll who on this forum has never been hit in too

 

Who on this forum has never hit into someone by acciden Like Forrest said "It happens"

 

 

As far as the private club thing you should have calmly mentioned it to your host and allowed for him to decide IF he should report them

 

If the situation had gotten nasty you would have been considered totally his responsibility.

[Sawgrass]

I know you didn't start the conflict. But it does seem you feel a bit guilty about your behavior. If not, why even worry about what your host might think? I think minor guilt was an appropriate reaction for you to have, although I believe that your transgression was in fact minor.

 

Unless he hit into you multiple times, it was probably an accident, and I believe he deserves the benefit of the doubt. Your teeing his ball up seems to me to be your attempt to modestly "get even" or "show him up" rather than to communicate, which perhaps could have been done simply by turning around and waving to him.

 

I've accidently hit into people. I've felt very bad about it. I wouldn't have liked the retribution of your having altered my lie. But that's just me.

 

I think apologizing to your host was the classy thing to do after the fact. I also think it reflects well on you that you're thinking about the whole incident.

 

If I were you I'd say to myself, "You live and you learn" forgive myself for this minor action, and avoid doing something similar in the future.

 

 

Anyway, seems like no lasting harm was done. I wish you the best.

[Blues Golfer]

As a member of a club, had you been my guest, I would have wanted to handle it for you, not have you do what you did. It would have been straighforward to stay with the ball until the hitter arrived, and asked if he yelled fore, did he realize how close he came to injuring my guest, etc.

 

Any member worth his dues would apologize and lie that they yelled fore, and the matter would be closed. But the hitter would be on notice that another member politely called him out.

 

Even though you had a close call, "how close" is immaterial, because now your friend is on the defensive. In an imperfect world, you let the perp off the hook.

[blade_man]

This is from the first page of "The Rules of Golf" under the etiquette section:

 

"Safety

 

Players should ensure that no one is standing close by or in a position to be hit by the club, the ball or any stones, pebbles, twigs or the like when they make a stroke or practice swing.

Players should not play until the players in front are out of range.

 

Players should always alert greenstaff nearby or ahead when they are about to make a stroke that might endanger them.

 

If a player plays a ball in a direction where there is a danger of hitting someone, he should immediately shout a warning. The traditional word of warning in such situations is "fore."

 

Consideration for Other Players"

 

 

 

 

If you were my guest and another member did this to you, I would have said "I will take care of it". Then I would have talked to the other member that did it in private later. I would have been fine with you teeing up his ball to make your point, he was the one who violated the rules of golf in the first place. I would have requested you to not say anything to him about it unless he brought it up to apologize.

 

 

 

 

Either way I am glad you weren't hurt and in the end no harm no foul thankfully.

 

I'm sorry for hijacking this but when I read the bold the first thought was "No one was thinking of Charles Barkley!" everyone would have to leave the course....as to the op, no biggie, you did ok for holding your temper.

[SUMM1T]

Let's let the facts be facts. You were a guest at his club. He should not have hit into you. But he did not hit you, though that seems harsh, it's the truth. Sometimes we don't have the right depth perception, and sometimes we hit shots further/better than we think we are going to.

 

So, he should not have done it, but you are not the rules official are enforcer, and you were the guest, so I don't think you were in any place to say anything. But I actually think that your friend who was a member could have said something, if you felt something needed to be said.

 

Teeing his ball up didn't serve a purpose.

[ezra76]

The tee thing is new to me but a creative idea. I don't think you should have to be all cautious and certainly not have to apologize for someone hitting into you. Had you been with me I would've said something to the guy myself. Certainly you want to follow etiquette wherever you play and it's cool to be even extra consciensious when at someone elses club. However, members of a club should also respect other members guests. Those guests are bringing in revenue to their club and keeping their bill down. We are being charged an extra $500 per member as an assessment fee because the club is hurting with all the bad weather there has been. They've lost a ton of potential and anticipated income in the last few months and that was entirely outside tournaments and guest fees.

[Carolina Golfer 2]

I don't think you should burn in hell or anything. :diablo: But I wouldn't have done anything, like Stage said. When you are a guest at a club or even someone's home course, everything you do is a reflection on them. From what you where, to the way you treat the staff, the way you play..etc you get the idea.

 

You did the right thing about apologizing to your host and he took it well. As for the guy who hit into you, I have been a guests at some pretty nice private clubs and have been amazed as well at lack of golf etiquette displayed by some members. So it happens everywhere.

 

 

This was the opinion of my other friend. Herein lies the discussion. I totally disagree.

 

I will tolerate a member telling me that I didn't get enough of every strand of grass in the the last divot to replace, or that these are the fastest greens in the twelve neighboring states, or that their handicaps aren't manipulated, it is just that they moved the blues back to the blacks or vice versa today... I can handle snobbery and typical manipulation to make members seem like better golfers, more sucessfully businessmen, etc...

 

However, being a dangerous player isn't something membership affords anyone. (IMO of course)

No disagreement with you what so ever on that point!!! OK, I'll admend my post, you should still apologize/explain to your host. THEN add something to the affect. "You might want to tell that Jackass member behind us, If he ever hits into me again, I'll personally shove that ball up his AZZ, I don't care if he's the President of the Club, he better learn some GD etiquette" Maybe something like that, I could understand as well :)

[Alefty]

I'm amazed at how much people seem to tolerate in this thread just because of the "private club" aspect. Hitting into someone is dangerous. I don't care if what the course is. The poster says it was 3 feet in front of him. That is the width of a standard doorway.

Someone hits into me from a blind teebox or something that is one thing, but under normal circumstances if someone hits a ball that close to me, the least I'm going to do is pick up that ball.

[DavePelz4]

We were playing Medinah #3 last fall. 18th hole...I was on the right side of the fairway which is 100% visible from the tee. We had been waiting on the group in front of us the entire round...but hey, it's Medinah, #3...am I going to call the clubhouse and ask for a ranger to come out?

Standing waiting to hit my second and see a ball hit right behind me and then realized it was on line and about to one hop me, right in the arse (fortunately). The guy who hit the ball came right up on us...we were STILL waiting on the group in front of us and he said...geez you are ******* slow. No apologies...nothing. He saw the group on the green in front of us and just stood there.

Didn't say a word...enjoy having the chance to play a great track. In the grill afterward he came up to me and I thought he was going to offer to buy a drink, etc. Bad assumption. He said...again...you play really slow.

[pingfool]

[quote name='stage1350' post='1834235' date='Jul 21 2009, 02:53 PM']Thank your friend. Whether you are in the right or not, creating problems when you are guest at another member's club is a sure fire way to never be invited back.[/quote]

ditto...
case of even when you're right...better to let the members police themselves. guests are guests and should bite their tongue etc.
no win situation for you...

[stevestrike]

Put his ball on a tee? Nah, just pick it up and write something creative for him with your sharpie (F-you, suck this or that, etc...)

Actually, I've done the tee thing before, and the sharpie thing before. I've never had to get to stage 3: whipping 'it' out and relieving myself on their ball.

[duff]

Things like that happen and doesn't indicate he was trying to cause a problem.

I would have ignored it, especially if the members let it go. If it happened a second time, I would have asked the members if this is normal and at that point, they should then take care of it.

You are their guest and should follow their lead.

[Pepperturbo]

There are many reasons people don't become members of private clubs; the obvious is money, the second is they lack the social skills; and don't know how to handle conflict.

[TwoFours]

I think you did the right thing, although you probably shouldnt have said anything afterwards. Teeing up his ball is a quiet way of telling him that he almost killed someone and does ZERO harm.

[roll - gybe]

Some good ideas here that are subtly new to me. Thanks for the opinions.
The reason I felt the discussion was relevant was because my other friend and I are still debating it.
You guys have added a few new elements to the discussion.

One point that I will hold my ground on is taking action to alert the guy who hit into me. I knew at the time it was an accident. However, the guy was young (40s), strongish, was hitting a wood for his second shot on a par 5. The ball was a well struck draw, so not his first good shot. Later, he didn't understand the teed up ball.

The man was in outer space at that point in time. (At best). I think he needed to be made aware of his surroundings and his hazardous play. It was hazardous. The ball flew three feet off my right shoulder. I could have impressed it into the ground with one step.

His pattern of activity was also hazardous. Hitting a wood from the deck with people still playing a par 5. So I feel the "do nothing" option is not one that I will chose in this case.

I like some of the ideas presented though, and I can incorporate some of those tactics in the future.
The sharpie is pretty funny, however, I'm not sure I would want him to have to see my note for multiple shots. Ha!

[roll - gybe]

[quote name='Pepperturbo' post='1835975' date='Jul 22 2009, 08:55 AM']There are many reasons people don't become members of private clubs; the obvious is money, the second is they lack the social skills; and don't know how to handle conflict. [/quote]


Funny, but I never said I wasn't a member somewhere else. Also, to get denied sponsorship/membership, you generally have to have some real problems unless we are talking PV and similar, where your business enemies can shut you down. I can't really think of many clubs that will (lame restrictions aside) deny someone with the adequate amount of money a membership. A few, but not many.

Also, while it is a different swimming pool than the muni track, members at private clubs can have some pretty poor social skills themselves sometimes.

Hopefully that comment was a joke.