Confessions of the average golfer

[MtlJeff]

[quote name='WalleyeDave' timestamp='1418523633' post='10590085']
[quote name='MtlJeff' timestamp='1418511401' post='10589277']
there are only 2 ways to hit a PW 170yds

1) have ridiculous clubhead speed
2) Use GI's and get flyers due to hot-spots, which can send your PW 170 and beyond with regularity...200-210+ easily. Casting imperfections man, they'll get you
[/quote]Sometimes if you blade one just right you can get that kind of distance. Although that never happens to a WRXer.
[/quote]

i never blade balls, ever!

My impact marks on my clubfaces are literally smaller then the spot that actually touches the ball. And that is not even possible

[DeNinny]

[quote name='TMelectric' timestamp='1418526489' post='10590255']
[quote name='DeNinny' timestamp='1418524977' post='10590165']
OP forgive me for I have sinned.

I confess that when I completely blow up a hole, like a quadruple bogey or worse, I will write down my ESC max score limit for the hole instead of my actual score. I loathe seeing that horrible number on the card.

OP you are correct. I feel better now for this. Nice thread!
[/quote]

Here is what I would do. Don't be ashamed of your scores. Draw smiley faces on your 10's.
[/quote]
TM thanks for the advice. Those are the wise words of a zen golfer.
I will also turn my 8's into happy snowmen with carrot nose and stick arms and a scarf.

[homergolf]

I need to go to the ER for the 4 hour limit WITHOUT using Cialis

[wooleeboolee]

[quote name='Qqq123xx' timestamp='1418513257' post='10589427']
My average 7 iron dipped from 192.5 yds. to 191.7 yds. I am so totally ashamed.
[/quote]

My son, your Qonfession is Qontrite...Qonsider your sins forqiven.

[wooleeboolee]

[quote name='homergolf' timestamp='1418527575' post='10590321']
I need to go to the ER for the 4 hour limit WITHOUT using Cialis
[/quote]

Wow. How UPstanding of you!! No pics, please. We believe you. Heh heh....

[DON SVO]

I confess that I tell my wife the callouses are because I have needs she doesn't "fulfill my lust on a regular-enough basis" to trick her into being more amorous... But they're really from constantly hitting 2 large buckets after work.

[Loki]

[quote name='DON SVO' timestamp='1418531498' post='10590529']
I confess that I tell my wife the callouses are because I have needs she doesn't "fulfill my lust on a regular-enough basis" to trick her into being more amorous... But they're really from constantly hitting 2 large buckets after work.
[/quote]

Huh, that's funny. I don’t have callouses on my left because I wear a glove when I hit two buckets after work and I don't have callouses on my right because...well never mind. Doesn't the friction remove the callouses anyway?

[The Beav]

I confess that I roll my ball out of divots in the fairway when not playing competitively.
I mean, I can barely make clean contact from the fairway so how the heck do I hit out of a beaver tail divot haha?

[GameDayDog]

I often brag to buddies about the times I drove a par 4, but I don't mention playing from the junior's tee box with my son.

[TMelectric]

[quote name='DON SVO' timestamp='1418531498' post='10590529']
I confess that I tell my wife the callouses are because I have needs she doesn't "fulfill my lust on a regular-enough basis" to trick her into being more amorous... But they're really from constantly hitting 2 large buckets after work.
[/quote]

That my just be the best excuse I have ever heard. I will borrow that if you don't mind

[TMelectric]

[quote name='The Beav' timestamp='1418536187' post='10590715']
I confess that I roll my ball out of divots in the fairway when not playing competitively.
I mean, I can barely make clean contact from the fairway so how the heck do I hit out of a beaver tail divot haha?
[/quote]

That falls under the grounds under repair catogory. You just have to know how to make the rules work for you

[TMelectric]

[quote name='GameDayDog' timestamp='1418537702' post='10590773']
I often brag to buddies about the times I drove a par 4, but I don't mention playing from the junior's tee box with my son.
[/quote]

No lie was made here. Rest your mind and live in peace. I tell people I shot a 74.I just don't tell them it was only 9 holes. See how this works? All in the wording.

[DON SVO]

[quote name='Loki' timestamp='1418534998' post='10590673']
Huh, that's funny. I don’t have callouses on my left because I wear a glove when I hit two buckets after work and I don't have callouses on my right because...well never mind. Doesn't the friction remove the callouses anyway?
[/quote]

I play without a glove. Read into that whatever you wish.

[billh17]

I actually used a cart...several times....when it was less than 95 outside....hope I don't get banned from this site..i'll try to do better next year

[2putttom]

[quote name='dennis4190' timestamp='1418512818' post='10589393']
Forgive me for using a staff bag this summer...
[/quote]Ewwww ...

[jrich61820]

Forgive me father, for I have sinned I'm not Catholic so this is my first confession:

I have removed the Scotty Cameron from my All Titleist bag and replaced it with a Byron Morgan.
The bag immediately began to smoke and burst into flames.
I am now in need of a new bag and set of clubs.

***crosses self and points to the sky***

[Imp]

[quote name='TMelectric' timestamp='1418506656' post='10588961']They say confessions are good for the soul. I want to start the new golf season with a clean slate. This thread is for the average golfer like myself to get things off their chest without being judged. I will start

I tell people that I hit my PW 175 yards when really I hit it only 170. There, I said it and feel better. Please join me by cleansing the soul and confess your deepest darkest secrets.[/quote]I tell people I putt 30+yards.

You're right. It does feel better!

--kC

[DeNinny]

Here is a prayer for my golfwrx brothers in sin:


The Our WRXer
Our WRXer, Who art on Golfworks, hallowed be Thy game; Thy A-game come, Thy eagles be done on the course as it is in the General Forum. Give us this day our daily bird; and forgive us our slow play as we forgive those who slow play in front of us; and lead us not into early extension, but deliver us from triples. Amen.

[TMelectric]

[quote name='DeNinny' timestamp='1418595657' post='10593033']
Here is a prayer for my golfwrx brothers in sin:


The Our WRXer
Our WRXer, Who art on Golfworks, hallowed be Thy game; Thy A-game come, Thy eagles be done on the course as it is in the General Forum. Give us this day our daily bird; and forgive us our slow play as we forgive those who slow play in front of us; and lead us not into early extension, but deliver us from triples. Amen.
[/quote]

That's the gospel right there. I vote to have this poem placed on the home page.

[DeNinny]

[quote name='TMelectric' timestamp='1418596538' post='10593103']
[quote name='DeNinny' timestamp='1418595657' post='10593033']
Here is a prayer for my golfwrx brothers in sin:


The Our WRXer
Our WRXer, Who art on Golfworks, hallowed be Thy game; Thy A-game come, Thy eagles be done on the course as it is in the General Forum. Give us this day our daily bird; and forgive us our slow play as we forgive those who slow play in front of us; and lead us not into early extension, but deliver us from triples. Amen.
[/quote]

That's the gospel right there. I vote to have this poem placed on the home page.
[/quote]
You are too kind and I owe it to you for this great thread. Here's another:

Hail Playa
Hail Playa full of game, Lord Byron is with thee. Blessed are thou among gamers and blessed is the ball from thy swing like Hogan's. Holy Playa owner of plus 'cap, pray for us hackers now and at the hour of our bet. Amen.

[Imp]

I'm gonna post that on my FB page.

[Michael C.]

Beautiful DeNinny........Birdies be with you....lol

For the Golfdom the fairways and the greens are yours now and forever. Amen

[Hellstorm]

This thread is CRAZY.....but I like it. I might as well confess my big sin.

I ran over my buddies ball with the golf cart in the rough and it may have been buried a little more than he could tell......he took a triple and I took his $5.

I did repent and spent half of his money buying him a Miller Lite though so maybe all is well.

[TMelectric]

[quote name='Hellstorm' timestamp='1418641253' post='10594975']
This thread is CRAZY.....but I like it. I might as well confess my big sin.

I ran over my buddies ball with the golf cart in the rough and it may have been buried a little more than he could tell......he took a triple and I took his $5.

I did repent and spent half of his money buying him a Miller Lite though so maybe all is well.
[/quote]

Well playing with a man's balls is forgivable as long as you don't play with his wife.

[TMelectric]

This is sort of in the lines of confession. But a funny story non the less. I was playing with a guy that is just bad. But he thinks he is a scratch golfer. You know the type, every time they hit their driver only 150 yards with a big ole banana slice, they are slamming the driver down on the ground and cussing. Or they topped their 100th ball always stating that they just don't have it that day. I have played with him 8 times now and he has never had it. But on with the story.

He bought a 72* wedge. I told him to be careful with that because he could put HIS eye out. He said and I quote " For the people that are not good, maybe. But he should have no problem." Two holes later, he was in the 2nd cut about 40 yards from the green. The ball was sitting up a little. Easy to get the iron under the ball. He asked me if he should try his 72* wedge and I said absolutely. Give it a big swing because the grass will slow you down. I stood back to watch and wished I had it on camera. He swung, hit the ball, ball went up and knocked his hat off his head. I have never laughed so hard. I can still see his face in slow motion. He has a little bump where the ball bounced off his big ole hard head.

Now for the confession. I had the opportunity to film this to show all of you guys but just wasn't thinking fast enough. I feel guilty of depriving you of pure entertainment. Not because I told him to use the 72* wedge and to swing hard. Maybe next time and knowing him, there will be more.

[CDLgolf]

[quote name='DeNinny' timestamp='1418524977' post='10590165']
OP forgive me for I have sinned.

I confess that when I completely blow up a hole, like a quadruple bogey or worse, I will write down my ESC max score limit for the hole instead of my actual score. I loathe seeing that horrible number on the card.

OP you are correct. I feel better now for this. Nice thread!
[/quote]

I also have to admit that I did this once or twice this year.

[TPG1971]

I carry a Wilson Staff Progressive 2 iron in my bag, I tell people it's because I can't hit a three wood. It's a total SHAM I can hit a three wood from anywhere about 275 with a baby draw. Forgive me!

[TMelectric]

[quote name='TPG1971' timestamp='1418649602' post='10595179']
I carry a Wilson Staff Progressive 2 iron in my bag, I tell people it's because I can't hit a three wood. It's a total SHAM I can hit a three wood from anywhere about 275 with a baby draw. Forgive me!
[/quote]

I certainly understand you not wanting people to know you can ONLY hit a 3 wood 275 yards.The Bible teaches vanity is a sin. From this day forward, go forth and tell the world that your 3 wood is only 275 yards and feel proud knowing that you are guilt free. Say three hallelujahs and two amens and you are forgiven

[TMelectric]

[quote name='clinville' timestamp='1418648366' post='10595129']
[quote name='DeNinny' timestamp='1418524977' post='10590165']
OP forgive me for I have sinned.

I confess that when I completely blow up a hole, like a quadruple bogey or worse, I will write down my ESC max score limit for the hole instead of my actual score. I loathe seeing that horrible number on the card.

OP you are correct. I feel better now for this. Nice thread!
[/quote]

I also have to admit that I did this once or twice this year.
[/quote]

Nothing to forgive here. I thought we all did this.....lol

[Tcann32]

I hit Ryan Carters new house during a match in my Tuesday night league this summer :-/. Also, I am a lefty. I know I stand on the wrong side of the ball, and I'm sorry.