How to Let Go the Anger?

Was in a bit of a Road Rage situation yesterday. Just minding my own business and a crappy BMW starts tailgating me. It was un safe to get over as a large dump truck was entering the highway. As soon as it was safe, I signaled to get over. BMW decided this was a good time to cut me off, he goes to the outside lane, flicks me off and mouths some nice words.

At this point my Rage sets in. I wanted to do very bad things. However, sane thoughts of the consequences came into my brain. So I let it go, but was very angry the rest of the day. It affected Golf later on too.

How do you guys let your anger go? Any tips? Share some stories if you want.

> @BB28403 said:

> Was in a bit of a Road Rage situation yesterday. Just minding my own business and a crappy BMW starts tailgating me. It was un safe to get over as a large dump truck was entering the highway. As soon as it was safe, I signaled to get over. BMW decided this was a good time to cut me off, he goes to the outside lane, flicks me off and mouths some nice words.

> At this point my Rage sets in. I wanted to do very bad things. However, sane thoughts of the consequences came into my brain. So I let it go, but was very angry the rest of the day. It affected Golf later on too.

> How do you guys let your anger go? Any tips? Share some stories if you want.

I go play golf, seems to sort it out pretty well.

Meditation practice

> @trilerian said:

> I go play golf, seems to sort it out pretty well.

I'll second this. Among many things, I see golf as a very cathartic activity. Something about showing up to the course with my clubs seems to make all the other BS fall away. But, if golf itself isn't working to get rid of the rage, maybe call up Koepka and get some tips on blocking everything else out while playing. He seems pretty good at it.

> @Philomathesq said:

> > @trilerian said:

> > I go play golf, seems to sort it out pretty well.

>

> I'll second this. Among many things, I see golf as a very cathartic activity. Something about showing up to the course with my clubs seems to make all the other BS fall away. But, if golf itself isn't working to get rid of the rage, maybe call up Koepka and get some tips on blocking everything else out while playing. He seems pretty good at it.

>

He does doesn't he ? Man he and tiger, wish I had their concentration.

> @BB28403 said:

> He does doesn't he ? Man he and tiger, wish I had their ~~concentration~~ money.

FTFY. :D

From the title I thought it was going to be about chunking a simple shot into the drink. I still can't let that go (the 100 times I've done it).

Man, if I could go to the golf course every time I became angry, life would be good. Unfortunately, that isn't an option for me.

Golf has taught me strategies for dealing with my anger better, however. In fact, that's the one realm of life where I feel like I have conquered the anger demons entirely.

First, I needed to have a rational realization that getting mad doesn't help anything. Second, I realized that I like to verbalize anger. Third, I came to understand that how I verbalized anger had an impact on how I dealt with it and how long it stuck with me.

Over time, I began replacing F-bombs with choice nuggets like "good gravy" and "oh my lord." This helped me to add some humor. I found that when I could get my playing partners laughing, that I would laugh too, and the anger would just melt away.

Again, over time, I found that my anger on the course came less frequently and didn't last as long. Now, I can honestly say that I don't get angry on the golf course.

Now, I just need to figure out a way to carry this over into other aspects of my life.

Y'all are talking about going golfing to escape the anger, but I fully expected this thread to be about letting go of anger _on the golf course_ lol.

Use your imagination to picture yourself on the French Riviera wearing a thong bathing suit while frolicking on the beach with ten topless international supermodels. That always works for me.

> @BB28403 said:

> How do you guys let your anger go? Any tips? Share some stories if you want.

Don't worry, God invented a special thing for those people called _poverty_. He'll get there in no time.

Haha...okay, that's harsh, LOL

I can relate though because I too have to hop on the interstate for a stretch when I go play and it's filled with impatient *****s who are often terribly reckless. And I'm a pretty fast and deliberate driver myself!

There isn't much you can do aside from avoid them and have a little sympathy given their OCD about weaving around and getting past the next person is really just their own psychological problem.

The best way to combat someone else's rage is to make fun of them until they get over it. That's what my dad used to do to me when I was a kid. I'd be yelling at him for something and he'd tell me I was joking. LOL...genius.

Basically just troll them. I got cut off the other day but I was able to catch up. So I took the chance to make some inappropriate gesture(s) as I went by that he would've had no alternative but to laugh at.

Anger isn't really the way anyone wants to be. It's a state wherein the person has lost control. So the best way to fight it is just to rise above it.

Just remember this...one man's rage is another man's comedy.

D-bags on the freeway, or the golf course, aren't worth the toll on your health (mental or otherwise), that getting angry will cause. I spend way too many hours in L.A. traffic, and see way too many a-holes. You just have to learn to let it go. They don't care what you think anyway, otherwise they wouldn't be a-holes.

Now a few of the wrong words from my wife when I'm on my way out the door on the way to the course can definitely do damage to my score that day.

Consider this: Being angry at someone or something over something you can't solve (your not going to chase them until they stop, are you?) Is giving them or it power over your life. Do you really want some stranger you will never see again to be in control of you?

Oh by the way, it affected golf, lol.

Musings about traffic encounters really have nothing to do with instruction.

Just let yourself melt and you'll be fine.

You just got to let it go. i got rear-ended a couple years ago on the freeway by a minivan on my way to work. When we pulled over he apologized and said some porsche or bmw had cut him off and in an effort to catch up to him, he didn't see the traffic suddenly stopped so he ran into my truck. He even said he just paid off his van, too. He seemed like a decent enough guy. Even offered to buy me coffee (i declined). We exchanged insurance/license information but all i could think of was, man... that guy basically jacked up his car and insurance rates just by getting road rage. Is the satisfaction of catching to someone just to yell or flip them off worth it if he had hurt someone unintentionally? Don't get me wrong, i get angry on the road and i'll find myself yelling through my window but i never do anything more than that... it's really not that big of a deal

> @Hawkeye77 said:

> Oh by the way, it affected golf, lol.

>

> Musings about traffic encounters really have nothing to do with instruction.

>

> Just let yourself melt and you'll be fine.

>

>

>

Actually I’m pretty sure I started it in ‘General Golf Talk’. Dunno how it ended up in Instruction. Thanks as always Hawkeye!

> @b_f_c_99 said:

> Consider this: Being angry at someone or something over something you can't solve (your not going to chase them until they stop, are you?) Is giving them or it power over your life. Do you really want some stranger you will never see again to be in control of you?

It’s one of those things, should we care? When should we care? If we turn off our concern over problems, does everyone walk all over you?

I feel like it is a fine line, and I get your point and this too is how I approach situations. Yet still situations we all get in, affect us in some way.

I once heard a strategy on a YouTube discussion . If you let someone walk over you then it is going to affect you more than if you stand up for yourself in that moment.

For instance someone is trying to jump tee times to get ahead of you. You either say nothing and let them (will bother you all day). Or assert yourself , say” look guys , I’m the 2pm tee time , it says so right here on this receipt.

And with that you Avert feeling as if someone walked all over you.

I get into these stupid situations all the time . I swear it’s like curb your enthusiasm , haha.

Even Monte’ posted about an incident he had at the Range a while back. Some knucklehead was hitting balls where Monte’ pays to have his tent and teach. He asked the guy to leave , but the guy didn’t . So he moved his stuff for him.

Because Monte’ knew he was in the right. He still felt the need to Vent some on WRX. Get some feedback ...

So we all go thru these stupid trials

> @BB28403 said:

> For instance someone is trying to jump tee times to get ahead of you. **You either say nothing and let them (will bother you all day)**. Or assert yourself , say” look guys , I’m the 2pm tee time , it says so right here on this receipt.

> And with that you Avert feeling as if someone walked all over you.

> I get into these stupid situations all the time . I swear it’s like curb your enthusiasm , haha.

You're kidding, right ? Or just trollling ?

> @"Ghost of Snead" said:

> > @BB28403 said:

> > For instance someone is trying to jump tee times to get ahead of you. **You either say nothing and let them (will bother you all day)**. Or assert yourself , say” look guys , I’m the 2pm tee time , it says so right here on this receipt.

> > And with that you Avert feeling as if someone walked all over you.

> > I get into these stupid situations all the time . I swear it’s like curb your enthusiasm , haha.

> You're kidding, right ? Or just trollling ?

>

>

Just giving examples of situations people find themselves in on and off the golf course. I do love to troll though, some days I just can’t get home fast enough from a busy day to get some trolling in. How about you? Done some trolling buddy?

I’m already starting to feel better. Thanks GofSS!

> @BB28403 said:

> > @"Ghost of Snead" said:

> > > @BB28403 said:

> > > For instance someone is trying to jump tee times to get ahead of you. **You either say nothing and let them (will bother you all day)**. Or assert yourself , say” look guys , I’m the 2pm tee time , it says so right here on this receipt.

> > > And with that you Avert feeling as if someone walked all over you.

> > > I get into these stupid situations all the time . I swear it’s like curb your enthusiasm , haha.

> > You're kidding, right ? Or just trollling ?

> >

> >

> Just giving examples of situations people find themselves in on and off the golf course. **I do love to troll though**, some days I just can’t get home fast enough from a busy day to get some trolling in. How about you? Done some trolling buddy?

>

> I’m already starting to feel better. Thanks GofSS!

>

It's obvious ...

No trolling here but when I get angry at reading threads like these, I just go out in the garage and beat the pulp out of my impact bag.

> @"Ghost of Snead" said:

> > @BB28403 said:

> > > @"Ghost of Snead" said:

> > > > @BB28403 said:

> > > > For instance someone is trying to jump tee times to get ahead of you. **You either say nothing and let them (will bother you all day)**. Or assert yourself , say” look guys , I’m the 2pm tee time , it says so right here on this receipt.

> > > > And with that you Avert feeling as if someone walked all over you.

> > > > I get into these stupid situations all the time . I swear it’s like curb your enthusiasm , haha.

> > > You're kidding, right ? Or just trollling ?

> > >

> > >

> > Just giving examples of situations people find themselves in on and off the golf course. **I do love to troll though**, some days I just can’t get home fast enough from a busy day to get some trolling in. How about you? Done some trolling buddy?

> >

> > I’m already starting to feel better. Thanks GofSS!

> >

> It's obvious ...

> No trolling here but when I get angry at reading threads like these, I just go out in the garage and beat the pulp out of my impact bag.

>

>

Ahh the old “Never me but probrably you” accusation strategy.

It’s ok, I know it well. Good luck with that impact bag.

I let it go by remembering that it really doesnt matter. Someone cut you off in traffic. So what? Does it matter?

I think my wife has the best strategy. She yells at someone who is used to getting yelled at and probably deserves it...like a Comcast rep.

BB, Your threads are weird.

OP, you are supposed to laugh at idiots. not let them upset you.

> @Fade said:

> OP, you are supposed to laugh at idiots. not let them upset you.

Haha oh I do. Watch some curb your enthusiasm, it’s the best!

> @Tanner25 said:

> BB, Your threads are weird.

Thanks man!

“Letting it go” is not the answer. You have to make this guy very uncomfortable- get on him, follow him, at the very least far enough to make him nervous, at most to his house. This guy isn’t anyone to worry about, he wasn’t going to hurt you. You have to show idiots like this who is in charge. I’m serious about all of the above.

Put yourself in his shoes.

All that money he spent on the car did nothing to fix the fact his wife cheats on him, his kid isn’t really his kid, he has ED and his boss is actually using him as a the fall guy for his own incompetence.

See. You feel better now huh.

It takes much more effort to keep angry/hold a grudge/etc.; then it does to let it go/move on/forgive/etc.

Think about the other drivers actions and how unhappy he/she must be to act that way.